I laughed as he all too soon peeled his body away from mine, helping me up, and I headed toward the bathroom that was attached to his office to get cleaned up. When I came out, he smiled in my direction but I noticed he was on the phone so I went back to my own desk to do the actual work that I was paid to do. I noticed that I had yet another missed call from Carter and a few from a number I didn’t recognize, so I decided to call Carter back first.
“Monroe, what the hell? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you all damn day,” he said before I could even get a hello out.
“Sorry, I’ve been—”
“Doesn’t matter,” he cut me off. “You need to get home. Now.”
“What? Why?” I began to panic, his tone was demanding but there was something else there that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. It definitely wasn’t the normal Carter.
“Monroe,” he bit out. “Don’t freak out, but it’s your dad. He’s in the hospital. Your mom wanted me to get you home. She’s there with him now.”
“What?” I dropped down into my seat, my legs giving out on me as my head tried to wrap around the fact that something was wrong with my dad. He was a rock, nothing ever got him down, ever. “What do you mean? What happened? Is he all right?”
“I don’t know if he’s going to be all right, Roe. Something happened while he was at work, they’re guessing it was a heart attack. Your mom called me and I told her I would get you home.”
“Okay, I’m coming. Right now. I’ll call you when I figure out what time I’m landing.” I stood up, grabbing my purse and running to Miller’s office, only to see him on the phone still. He held up one finger to me, his face twisted with confusion, probably from seeing the expression on my face. I could tell he was trying to get off the phone with whoever he was talking to, but the person on the other end just kept blabbing on and on. I shook my head, mouthing “I have to go,” and turned in the opposite direction.
I couldn’t wait, I had to leave now.
I wasn’t going to waste any time that could be spent with my dad. Something else could happen to him and I would regret it for the rest of my life. It was already going to be bad enough having to sit on the airplane, wondering, and who knew how quickly I would be able to find a flight. I needed to be there for my dad.
I BREATHED A sigh of relief as soon as I stepped into the hospital room and was able to grab onto my dad’s hand, squeezing it tightly, and know that he was still here. He wasn’t looking the greatest. The man lying in that hospital bed didn’t resemble my strong but serious dad in the slightest; he looked frail and almost childlike.
“Monroe, I’m so glad you’re here, sweetheart,” my mom said quietly, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and kissing the side of my head. “I just can’t believe—” Her voice broke and she moved to cover her mouth with her hand, muffling the sobs that were trying to escape.
“It’s going to be okay, Mom. He’s going to be fine.” I patted her on the back before wiping away my own tears that had remained silent. “He’s going to be just fine,” I repeated.
“You’re always the one I can count on, Roe.” She sat down in a chair that was pulled up closely to my dad’s bedside and grabbed onto his other hand.
“Where are Holland and Jackson?”
“The cafeteria, I think. I haven’t seen them in a while. They said they can’t handle seeing him like this, so they’ve been trying to keep themselves busy.”
“Those two need to grow the hell up,” I bit out. “They should be here supporting you.”
“It’s okay, Monroe. I’m just glad you’re here.”
“It’s not okay,” I muttered but I tried to let it go for now. For now, I was just going to have to be the rock for my mom and dad because someone had to be.
Over the next few days, I did just that. My mom was a mess most of the time, even though she tried to hold herself together, it was almost impossible. Her and my dad were going on almost thirty years of marriage, so I could see why. Holland and Jackson held true to form, not being there when they should have been. I just didn’t understand it and their attitudes frustrated the hell out of me. My parents had always been there for them for everything; it was their turn to be there.
“How’s your dad doing today?” Miller asked and I snapped my attention back to him, pressing the phone to my ear.
“He’s all right, seems like he’s getting a little bit of strength back, but not much.”
“I still can’t believe you just up and left, Monroe. I would’ve gone with you.”
“Miller.” I sighed and grabbed my snacks out of the vending machine before sitting down in the waiting room so I didn’t wake my dad up. “I know, but you’re super busy right now and I didn’t want you to have to rearrange your schedule.”
“You’re so damn stubborn, Monroe. Next time, let me worry about that shit, all right?”
“Mmhmm,” I muttered, taking a bite out of my candy bar. I really missed regular food but I refused to leave the hospital, let alone the floor that my dad was on.
“So how long do you plan on staying up there? You know you can take off as much time as you need.”
“I know. I’ve already talked to Nina and she said the same thing. I’m not sure yet. Once my dad does get to go home it’ll be a while until he’s back on his feet and they can’t survive without my mom working so she won’t be home to take care of him. And I couldn’t even think of Jackson taking care of him, even though he doesn’t do a thing during the day. So, I don’t know how long I’m going to be here. Sorry.”
“Hey, don’t be sorry,” he said softly and it made me wish he were here right now so I could just let myself get lost in his arms for a little while. “Make sure you’re taking care of yourself, too. I miss you.”
“I miss you too. Oh, and thanks for the flowers, they smell so good.” The thought of them made me smile. Two vases had been delivered to my dad’s room, one for him and one for me, only mine had a special note. “And I love you too.”
He made some sort of noise that I knew acknowledged that he at least heard me even though he still couldn’t say it. I was okay with the little ways that he showed me that he loved me, but I hoped that one day maybe I would actually hear them.
“Carter been around?” he asked, finally breaking the silence. I could hear the tenseness in his voice just from mentioning Carter’s name, and I hated that he couldn’t trust me to be around Carter. I could understand why though.
“Yeah, he’s been here,” I responded vaguely. No way in hell was I going to tell him he was sitting in my dad’s room right now, waiting for me to come back. Carter had been trying to convince me all morning to let him take me back to my parents’ house so I could at least shower and grab a nap in a comfortable bed, but I refused. With the way my eyes were fighting me, though, I might just have to take him up on that offer.
“All right,” he answered stiffly. “I should get going. I have a client who should be showing up pretty soon.”
“Okay, talk to you later.”
I headed back to my dad’s room and it took Carter asking me two more times to let him take me home before I finally gave in. Carter was one of my best friends, but I really wished it had been Miller there for me. I just needed him and I knew he would make me feel a little bit better.
I WENT HOME after work and I have no idea why. I loved the house that I built specifically for myself, but now that Monroe was gone, it just didn’t feel right. I missed her dancing all around the house, singing softly along to whatever music was blaring. I missed waking up with her in my bed, curled against my side with one leg flung over mine. I even missed her attempts in the kitchen that normally went extremely bad.
I popped the top off a beer and then headed straight toward my bedroom, pulled a bag out of the closet, and began cramming clothes in. I wasn’t going to wait for her to come to me. It had been two weeks since she left, and even though I understood that she needed to be there, I needed to see her. She hadn’t mentioned when
she was coming back and I really didn’t want to ask. I knew that her dad was getting better every day, but who knew how long it would take for him to fully recover. I could tell she was exhausted from trying to take care of everyone, but she wouldn’t admit it. She was too damn stubborn, so I needed to go take care of her.
“Hey, anybody home?” I heard yelled from the living room and I yelled back.
“I’m up here, Luke.” He was up the stairs and standing in my doorframe within seconds. It was good to have Luke back in town, especially since he was running Pure so smoothly. I rarely needed to go in there, even though I tried to stop in once or twice a week, but when I did it was mainly to catch up on any paperwork that Luke wasn’t able to get to. To top it off, all of the dancers seemed to be in love with him. I don’t think they had caught on yet that he wasn’t interested in the females of the species.
“Going somewhere?”
“Yeah, I’m gonna head up to see Monroe. Think you can handle the club on your own for a while?”
“I think I’ll be able to manage. ‘Bout time you headed up that way, I can tell you’ve been itchin’ to see her. How in the world, by the way, did you get Mamaw to like Monroe? Every time I see her she’s always going on and on about that sweet girl of Miller’s and how you need to ask her to marry you already. What’s up with that? I thought she was all set on you whisking Tara off into the sunset.”
“It’s hard not to like Monroe. I was hoping Mamaw would warm up to her and luckily she did because that old woman was ruder than hell the first time they met. She’s lucky I talked to her after that.”
“Yeah, she can get awfully mean if she doesn’t get her way, can’t she?” I nodded my head, grabbing one last shirt because I really wasn’t sure how long I would end up being there. I planned on calling Tanner on the way to let him know I would be out of the office for a few days. I knew he could handle the crews to make sure they were getting the job done right. “Need a ride to the airport?”
“Nah, I’ll just leave my truck there. Make sure you call me if you need anything.”
“Will do, cousin, go take care of your girl.”
I found a flight that left within the next couple of hours, so I headed toward the airport and set up a rental car for when I landed. I figured I would just call Monroe when I got there or show up at her parents’ house. She was busy enough taking care of her dad, she didn’t need to worry about picking me up from the airport like I knew she would.
My flight seemed to drag by and I knew it was because I was in a rush to see Monroe. I hadn’t realized how big a part of my life she’d become until I didn’t see her every day.
Mamaw started mentioning the words marriage and grandbabies lately whenever I dropped into the restaurant and it got me to thinking. Monroe didn’t talk about her womanly problems very often after the one time that she’d told me about them. She said there was a possibility that she couldn’t have kids and I knew that wasn’t a deal breaker. I wanted Monroe for Monroe, no matter what problems came along with her. We would solve them together. I knew that would be a couple of years down the road, but I also knew that I did want kids. We would have to look at our options, but I think the marriage part needed to come first.
After I finally landed, I got my rental car and made the short drive to her parents’ house. I knocked on the door a couple of times, but didn’t get an answer, and I groaned when I realized the door was unlocked. She must’ve picked up that habit from her parents. I don’t know how many times I’d had to remind her to lock her apartment door when she lived by herself.
I found Mr. Hartley asleep on the couch with a baseball game playing on the TV, the volume muted, and a radio playing nearby that was broadcasting the game. Apparently, he was like me and preferred the radio announcers over the TV ones. I didn’t spot Monroe anywhere so I figured she was taking the opportunity to catch a nap of her own, so I headed down the hallway toward her bedroom.
I wished that I hadn’t.
I wished that I’d never came so I didn’t see what I saw. But if that didn’t happen then I guess I would’ve never known how much of a dumbass I had been all along. Monroe had been playing me when she said she didn’t have feelings for Carter because if she were truthful, then why in the hell was he in her bed, her head laying in his lap as he stroked her hair and she snored lightly.
Carter looked up as soon as I opened the door, my insides catching fire with a raging anger coursing through my veins. The look on his face said it all. At first, there was a trace of shock to see me standing there, but then he had the audacity to look like a cocky son of a bitch. I wanted to beat the ever-living shit out of him, and I still don’t know how I didn’t. I guess because I didn’t want to waste any more of my time.
I opened my mouth to at least say something, but he held a finger up to his lips as if to quiet me because Monroe was sleeping. I slammed my fist into the doorframe, hearing a loud crack, and Carter just continued to sit there in my girl’s bed with a cocky grin on his face, her hair sprawled out across his lap, and I felt my stomach roll the same time that I gripped my fist that was burning. It definitely felt like something was broken and I had to get out of there before I broke something else, or turned my fist onto Carter.
“MILLER,” I MURMURED his name as his hands stroked my hair and I smiled without opening my eyes, my body relaxing for the first time in a while, and I let myself melt into his lap. I was completely exhausted, taking care of my dad and constantly worrying about him. I can’t remember the last time that I let myself sleep for longer than an hour at a time. He seemed to be recuperating just fine, but I was anxious something would still happen to him.
His hands moved from my hair to just under the hem of shirt, stroking my back in light circles, and suddenly I remembered where I was and that Miller definitely wasn’t here with me. I bolted straight up, my eyes going wide when I snapped my head around to see that it was in fact not Miller.
“What in the hell, Carter?” I shrieked and he reared backward, holding his hands up defensively.
“Calm down, Roe.”
“Calm down?” I repeated, I jumped up from the bed, rubbing at my eyes to make sure I was really awake. How did he think this was okay? “Seriously? This is not okay. Why are you in my bedroom? Why was I laying in your lap? And why in the hell were your hands all over me?”
“Monroe, everything okay?” I heard my dad holler from the living room and I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down so I wouldn’t stress him out.
“Everything’s fine, Dad,” I replied in the most chipper voice I could muster. I turned back to Carter, narrowing my eyes. “What the hell, Carter?” I hissed.
He shrugged his shoulders, like it wasn’t a big deal or something. “I showed up and found you passed out in bed. You looked uncomfortable as hell so I pulled you onto my lap. You didn’t even wake up. Apparently, you didn’t mind.”
“Apparently,” I grumbled. I must’ve really been worn out because I was usually a light sleeper and I don’t know how in the hell I slept through that. Maybe it was wishful thinking that it was Miller in bed with me because I missed sleeping next to him.
“Monroe.” He got off the bed, taking a step closer to me and reaching his hand out to grab mine but I smacked him away. “Don’t act like you’re mad. I know shit is crazy right now with your dad, but you’re gonna be home for a while. Why can’t we just try things out now, see where our relationship goes? Things were good between us before. This time they can be even better.”
“You’re delusional, Carter.” I shook my head. “I’m with Miller and I’m happy. I’m sorry that you can’t see that, but it’s not changing any time soon, so you just need to back off or we can’t be friends any more. Simple as that.”
He had the gall to smirk at me, freaking smirk at me. I don’t know what exactly about that statement he found funny. “Well, that might change soon enough.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“It means that Mi
ller was here.”
“What?” The butterflies in my stomach started going crazy at the fact that Miller was here. I’d been wanting to seem him but I knew how busy he was and I didn’t want to seem like a needy girlfriend by asking him to come up here. “What do you mean he was here?” I asked lowly, already thinking I knew the answer, but I wouldn’t believe it until I heard it. My legs started to shake and Carter gulped thickly.
“I mean, he came while you were sleeping…and saw us in your bed.”
I knew what he was going to say, but that didn’t make it any better. I collapsed back onto my bed, dropping my head down and trying to make myself believe that I was dreaming—no, this would be more like a nightmare. I knew Miller had trust issues, I knew he didn’t like Carter, and I knew exactly what he thought when he walked into my room and saw me with Carter. I couldn’t blame him. I didn’t have his kind of issues and I would’ve jumped to conclusions too. If I walked in on the same situation, I would’ve been heartbroken beyond belief. Miller probably had the same reaction but his was probably mixed with a whole lot of anger and it made me wonder how in the hell Carter was still standing. Miller’s temper could get a little out of control.
“He saw us together and jumped to conclusions and then he left. Don’t you think he would’ve stayed if you meant anything to him, Monroe? He should’ve at least let you explain what was—”
I didn’t let him get any other words out because, now, he had completely pissed me off. Maybe some of Miller’s temper had rubbed off on me because for the first time in my life, I felt like punching someone, so I did. I nailed my fist as hard as possible straight into Carter’s nose, and I was surprised at how good it felt. I don’t think I did much damage because I didn’t hear anything crack or see any blood, and I think I would have felt a teensy bit bad if that happened, but he deserved it.
Midnight Ballerina Page 25