by Lucy Scala
That question startled me and I found myself unable to formulate an answer.
Fiamma slid her hand in mine. She squeezed it hard to give me courage and replied for me. “When you were born you were a baby. You were really small and you cried a lot,” she began to tell him, capturing Lukas’s attention. “Your mother thought to protect you and love you with all her heart. Without her, you wouldn’t have survived.”
Lukas sat on the ground, crossing his legs, next to Casper. “So you also need a mummy to grow?”
I settled beside him. “We all need love and parents who take care of us. We weren’t born to be alone, but to surround ourselves with people who make us happy. I’m sure that Casper had a good mother, but dogs are often separated from their parents for adoption.” I caught my breath. “So the owner replaces the mother. It’s his task to take care of the puppy, like one of the family.”
“Now I understand: his owner wasn’t a good mother,” he said with tears in his eyes. “But why? How could he forget about him?”
Casper rolled in the grass, emitting some comical sound and then jumped to his feet, ready to wipe the child’s tears away.
“Because he was too busy thinking about himself and forgot the rest,” I said in a small voice.
I realized that there was another boy and a woman nearby, watching us, a few steps away me. Lukas straightened his back, Martina waved her small hand to greet them and began speaking solemnly. “Come here, don’t be afraid. That’s Giulio and his mother Paola.”
So this was Giulio. I concentrated on that quiet boy who was holding his mother’s hand. He didn’t have unusual attitudes nor did he get agitated, but I knew immediately that he wasn’t able to communicate effectively. He was attentive, alert and calm, but showed a certain inability to express himself.
“Hello, did you bring Giulio to meet the dog?” asked Roberta.
“Yes, I explained to him what this beautiful young lady will do and Giulio made me understand he was happy.”
“Thank you,” I answered, beaming. “Nice to meet you, please call me Mia.”
Giulio looked up at me and then laid his eyes on Casper. He produced a high pitched squeal.
Paola told us that her son had been diagnosed with a form of autism at the age of two and since then, had been subjected to various therapies without any real improvements. His body had grown, taking the form of a boy of his age, but his physical and cognitive abilities had not developed normally.
“I have a dog, too!” cried Martina.
“Really? And what’s his name?” I asked, smiling.
Lukas interrupted her. “It’s not true. You haven’t got a real dog.”
Martina scowled and crossed her arms. “Of course I have. He’s called Pepsi.”
Lukas shook his head slowly, before pointing a finger at her. “No, you’ve got a cuddly toy and it’s also ugly. I really had a dog,” he began triumphantly.
“He’s still a dog, even if he’s a toy, and I love him,” concluded Martina, sticking her tongue out.
I tried to hold back a laugh and joined the conversation. “We aren’t here to fight, but to do something beautiful. It doesn’t matter whether you have a real or a stuffed dog, today I’ll teach you something about them.”
The children fell silent and turned towards me. Fiamma came up with Casper and helped me to encourage them. “Come on, which one of you wants to learn how we take care of the animals?”
Two hands went up at the same time, accompanied by laughter and enthusiastic comments.
Little Martina wouldn’t stop throwing glances at Lukas and continued behaving like a prima donna.. “Oh, poor thing, is he sick?” she asked, when she realized Casper’s condition.
I was about to speak, but a voice anticipated me.
“Of course he’s sick. Have you ever seen a hairless dog?” The little girl started to talk again. “It was only a question. And you’re really annoying today…” she muttered, under her breath.
I looked for Fiamma, asking for moral support with my eyes. Those children were worse than adults.
“I don’t want to hear you two arguing, especially about these things. Now, let’s move to the shade, near the benches, and have a chat,” I said firmly. I didn’t like to show my stern side, but I had no choice on that occasion.
I smiled and took Lukas by the hand. Footsteps followed us and I suddenly felt light headed. In that moment, a feeling of well being exploded that life gave me without asking for anything in return.
“So, now we’ll all sit next to each other and introduce ourselves. So even our four legged friend will learn to know you better,” I said, throwing a meaningful look at Fiamma.
“Of course,” agreed Paola, who sat next to Giulio.
I breathed in deeply. “My name is Mia and this is Fiamma, a friend of mine. And together we saved Casper to allow him to get better.” I was going to continue the introductions, but the timid voice of Martina stopped me.
“Was he dying?” she asked, in a small voice.
I waited a few seconds before answering, and to find the words appropriate for children their age. “Yes, if we hadn’t taken him away from the place he was in,” I answered truthfully.
Lukas and Martina brought their hands to their mouths, accompanying the gesture with a surprised ‘ooh’, and Giulio imitated them. “Will he go to a hospital too?” murmured Lukas and reached out to touch Casper’s nose.
“It’s not a hospital like this, but it looks a lot like one. In the clinic we take care of all the animals that visit us and take care of those looking for a home. Casper will have to get his strength back and find a family to live with,” I declared.
Martina walked up to Casper and gently stroked the dog’s back. “Is he suffering a lot?” she asked again, putting me into a difficult situation.
“He’s not suffering now, he just has to finish his course of treatment and he will be even more beautiful than before. He understands you better than anyone else,” I said.
Lukas didn’t take his eyes away from Casper. “I had hair. Mummy says that after the medicine it will grow stronger than before,” he added, his voice unsure, his fingers brushing his smooth scalp.
Silence fell around us. I fought back the tears with difficulty. Fiamma hugged him, and then, impulsively lifted him up.
We all laughed and Casper barked and ran round in circles. I tried to convince him to stop, but he ignored me.
“Miss Mia—” whispered Martina.
“Tell me everything,” I said, motioning her to sit by my side, but with my eyes still glued on Fiamma and Lukas.
“I have all my hair, but I have a bad heart. The doctor says that soon I will receive a new one that will work well. After the operation, I can go home and finally have all my toys,” she murmured softly.
“You’ll certainly have the most beautiful healthy heart in the world.”
“Really? The most beautiful in the world?” she asked, euphoric and full of hope.
I nodded, and she sank into my arms.
I didn’t know that little girl, I didn’t know anything about her, but one thing was certain: she already had the biggest heart in the world. At that precise moment I realized that our four legged friend was perfect for Martina.
“Fiamma, do we have a stethoscope in the bag?”
She nodded and handed it to me. “Martina, do you want to try and hear Casper’s heart?” I asked.
“Can I really?” she asked.
“Good boy, Casper, come here.” I pulled the leash slightly towards us. “Here, Martina. Put these in your ears, and hold this disk on his chest. Are you ready?”
The girl’s eyes widened when she heard the rhythmic beating of his heart.
“Can I do it too? Please—” asked Lukas.
“Sure, come here.”
The afternoon seemed to pass quickly, that hadn’t happened for a long time. The children were excited and shrieking with joy. Hearing their voices fuelled my good mood.
When Roberta approache
d us, I realized that the time available was over. “Lukas, it’s time to go back to your room. And you two, it’s better if you go back inside as well,” she muttered, resting her hands on Lukas’s shoulders.
“Five more minutes,” cried Martina, and Lukas followed suit, begging for more time. Even Giulio, who until a few minutes before had remained silent, showed displeasure.
Roberta shook her head. “No, children. The time for today is over. Come on, let’s go back upstairs.”
“All right,” muttered Lukas.
“Follow the nurse. We’ll see you very soon and perhaps with some other surprises,” I promised them, winking.
“Promise!” said Lukas, and a corner of his tiny mouth curled into a smile.
“Promise,” I said, crossing my fingers and bringing them to my lips.
I hugged Fiamma as I watched the children walk back to the hospital from the garden.
I reached into my pocket and took out a biscuit. “Well done, Casper! Good job.”
Chapter eight
The day at work went by quickly, but I did not hear from Alberto. I had to concentrate not to think of him and about that short and abrupt call.
My thoughts were interrupted by a voice behind me. “Excuse me, may I?” he asked.
I turned and there he was, in front of me, smiling and happy. Alberto had come in with the same resolute gait and successful masculine air that I had found so attractive the first time he had spoken to me.
“Sure,” I said, intent in compiling a diagnosis on the computer.
Antonio and Fiamma were watching and whispering something between them. I coughed, embarrassed and ignored their mischievous smiles. They were really irritating.
“These are for you,” he began, handing me a box of milk chocolates. “I thought I needed to find a plausible excuse to introduce myself here. Excuse me for not coming to greet you on your first day in hospital.”
I opened the box and ate one. I had skipped lunch and my stomach was rumbling. “You apologize a bit too often, you know?”
“You’re not upset with me, right?”
“Come, let’s go and talk somewhere else,” I murmured. The presence of Alberto made me uncomfortable. After that kiss, having him a few centimetres away from me made breathing difficult. I had always had a weakness for confident men. Yes, I really liked him. Alberto was a gift I was giving myself.
I crossed the office briskly, opened a glass door and let him through. “Alberto, meet Casper. He’s my little helper.”
He opened his eyes wide, watching the dog resting in his cage. “And why did you choose him?”
I came closer. “It was Fiamma who convinced me that he was up for the job and he proved that he was. You had to see them, Alberto, it was something magical.”
Alberto reached through the bars and Casper came up, sniffing and licking him gently.
“It was for everyone, and in the department no one is talking about anything else.” Alberto took my hands in his. “You are very talented and I am a very lucky man,” he whispered.
I stood watching him. All the barriers I had built in my mind over time fell one after another. Up until a few months ago I would have wanted to distance myself from any relationship, but not now. I had another chance to be happy and I didn’t intend to let it go.
“Then tell me,” I said, getting close to his neck.
“What?” he asked.
“Tell me you want me too, please.” Alberto’s expression changed in an instant. He looked at me with interest, as if to detect changes in my face.
“When did you change your mind?”
“I never changed my mind, I only needed some time to understand…”
Alberto put his hand on my hip and with the other lifted my chin. I could smell the scent of his skin. I had missed him.
“If you don’t feel ready…” he murmured, “Tell me to stop and I will.”
I reached my fingers out to stroke him, but he was faster and lifted me off the ground and sat me on the desk. I was conscious of my impudence. I put my legs around his waist, and squeezed him tightly. His pulse accelerated. He bit my lower lip. It was a strong and exciting feeling. A slow, sweet torture, until he moved his mouth on my neck, trying to bite me. I moved my head but Alberto came close again, trying to catch my skin. I pulled away abruptly.
“What’s up?”
I had to tell him the truth and stop remaining entangled in that web of lies built up over time. Remaining anchored to the old road was the easiest solution, as always.
“Your stubble’s tickling me,” I lied.
“I won’t shave any more because I like the way you try to slip away,” he whispered. He opened his coat, kissed my shoulder and dropped his hand to slide it under the thin cotton of my top.
“Alberto, I won’t ruin everything this time,” I said.
Our tongues touched, searching for each other and encircling each other firmly. I let him explore without any hesitation on my part and I offered myself to him without wavering. Why had I waited so long?
His eyes stared at me intensely. A faint smile lit up his face, I wouldn’t have been able to stop myself even if I tried. He was about to pull my top off when a noise invaded our intimacy: brisk and decided footsteps were approaching, and I had only a split second to close my gown. Fiamma threw the door open and froze, her eyes widened. “Oh, sorry,” she said awkwardly. “Mia, there’s someone looking for you…” she added, through gritted teeth.
“Who is it?” I muttered.
Fiamma grabbed me by the arm and, without being heard by Alberto, informed me that Diego was waiting for me at the entrance.
“Shit!” I exclaimed.
“Everything okay?” asked Alberto, standing behind us. “Yes, yes. I have to go back, maybe we’ll talk about this on another occasion,” I concluded with a wink. “I’ll lead you out.”
Alberto gave me a puzzled look, but said no more and followed us.
“Mia, what a pleasure to see you again,” cried Diego. He walked over and hugged me tightly. “You look flushed, very flushed. Are you okay?” his smile was curious.
From his tone I knew he was teasing me. Diego hadn’t lost his sense of humour, but his appearance was different. With his unruly hair and a helmet under his arm, he looked like a scruffy teenager on a road trip.
“What—” I whispered, confused. “Yes, and don’t think it’s because of you. I was in the back visiting the dogs and it’s not easy to keep them at bay,” I cut him short, ignoring the allusion.
“Hello, Doctor. I’m Maria, a friend of Diego’s,” said an amazing brunette in high Jimmy Choo heels. Her gaze lingered on my uniform. Instinctively, I settled my hair with my hands, and thought they were quite clean. I was wearing a long white coat and a pair of safety shoes. Maria wrinkled her delicate nose and put a fake smile on her face.
I squeezed her hand. “Maria, it’s really you?” I asked in mock surprise. “Diego told me a lot about you and I see that the appointment went well.”
That brief contact confirmed the first impression I had of her.
Her laugh sounded mocking, then her eyes moved over my shoulder. I whirled.
“I know,” interjected Alberto. “You can’t have forgotten me.”
I just stared at him quizzically.
“Alberto? Is that you?” Maria came up and kissed him.
“You look fantastic.”
“You know each other?” I asked, incredulously.
“Yes, we have some friends in common,” said Alberto. “Yes, more or less,” confirmed Maria and giggled excitedly.
I didn’t like the idea that the man who occupied my thoughts had dated that woman.
“Oh,” said Diego. “Ex-colleagues?” Trying to guess.
“Of course not. He… he is…” Maria looked around for Alberto’s complicity.
“A neighbour, or at least we were until a few years ago.”
Maria nodded in approval. “Exactly.”
“What an incredible
coincidence,” said Diego.
“Yeah, what a coincidence,” I muttered through gritted teeth. “And now, do you live far apart?”
I couldn’t resist.
They both laughed.
“Not really. What a pity, I remember that among other things you were a very good cook.”
“Always generous with compliments,” downplayed Alberto. I wondered if they had also been lovers.
“And you are as modest as ever, your dinners were something else.”
Alberto brightened, enjoying the compliment. “In my opinion it was thanks to all that wine,” he said.
“Are you still mad at me for having signed you up for that cooking programme?”
Alberto and Maria were excluding us. Every nerve in my body was screaming in rage.
“Will anyone listen to me?” I raised my voice. “I find everything very interesting and I would like to write down a few recipes, but I should get back to work. Diego, the reason for your visit?”
“Yes, sorry, but I was hooked on this gripping conversation. I brought you the book you asked for.”
Diego pulled a book with a red cover from a bag and handed it to me. Why this sudden kindness?
I turned it round, on the back a post-it read: “For your evenings in the armchair.” Driven by curiosity, I raised it to be able to read the title and covered it instantly.
I squeezed a book called Kamasutra to my chest. I stood with a stony gaze.
I was incredulous. Good heavens, what was going through his head?
“So, was it that one or not? Are you happy?” insisted Diego.
“It was very generous of you to come all this way to bring it to me, very generous.”
“I did it with pleasure. You cared so much and you were so excited about the idea of reading it that I couldn’t resist,” he laughed, and gave me a slight nudge.
I didn’t appreciate the irony. The only thing I wanted to do was kick him out. “I’m grateful for all your trouble.” Proud of my self-control, I turned with an angelic smile.
“What book is that?” asked Alberto quickly.
“Nothing exciting, a dull story about a vet.”
“Really! The other day you begged me for it, and kept telling me that you needed it for your exercises. It will be more useful to you than to me.” Diego shot me a look, raising an eyebrow.