“Oh. Okay.” I had nothing else to say so I lifted the blanket, rolled over giving him my back and maybe on purpose, a great view of my butt with next to nothing on.
He was either praying or cursing the heavens before he climbed into the bed - under the blankets - and pulled me into him once more.
“Sweet dreams, Noah.”
“You, too, Sugar.” He kissed the back of my head before I drifted off in total peace.
Chapter 6
Something hot was pinning me down and my heart made its departure from my chest to the ceiling. Taking several deep breath to assess the situation without giving anything away, I realized whatever it was, smelt like Heaven.
Noah.
I remembered the minutes before his phone call and opened my eyes to look around.
He stayed all night and for another first in my whole life, I didn’t have one single nightmare at all. I actually had a very naughty dream starring a very sexy cowboy.
There is absolutely no way for me to move without waking him so I just lay still, basking in his warmth trying not to lick or bite him. I have this intense need to feel him, to kiss him, to taste him. Something deep inside me moved me without rhyme or reason.
With the tiniest amount of movement, I turn my head to the side to place a chaste kiss on his
muscular bicep. Deep in my bones, it felt like my life depended on kissing him, connecting with him physically.
“Sugar, I’ve got something for you to kiss and it ain’t my arm.” His gruff, sleep heavy voice vibrated against my back, tickling me down to my toes.
My face heated at being caught.
He ran his lips from my shoulder blade up my neck to kiss behind my earlobe.
I let out a soft breathy sound and he groaned; pressing his hardened length against my rear making me push back into him involuntarily.
A knock sounded at the door causing Noah to growl. Well, that or my sudden need to climb him like a tree.
“Holy fuck. Now I know why Tommy does it.” He murmured before releasing me and rolling awkwardly off the bed.
Someone knocked again before Noah made it to the door.
“Jesus, come in already.”
Matt swung the door open and Luke followed him in, sauntering over to the corner chair like he owned the place.
“Let’s do this somewhere else.” Noah commanded softly.
“No. She deserves to know. Jamie always likes to be in the know and this is no different. It’s her life.” Matt answered, coming to stand beside me in support.
I sat up in the bed, clutching the sheet to my chest. He winked at me then turned back to the
“What’s going on?” I asked.
Luke peered up at Noah and shrugged his shoulders apologetically. “Sorry man, he’s right.”
Noah paced by the bedroom door wearing a scowl, keeping his eyes on mine.
“Sweetheart that email was sent by someone who knew what they were doing. There is literally no trace of the sender or location. Eventually Luke will figure it out but it’s going to take a long time and in my experience, time is never on the good guys’ side.” Matt said.
“How do you even know it was for me?”
Enter face palm here.
I knew it was, without a doubt but I couldn’t help asking. Asking stupid questions was like an automatic defense – ask ludicrous question, pray the answer has mysteriously changed.
All three men shared a look of discomfort before Noah faced me and said, “He sent another email last night.”
I meant to ask what it said but Luke answered first.
“It was for us. Basically, they said they know who we are, what we do and where we are.” He hesitated but steeled his spine and finished. “They also said they thought they were going to come and take you back where you belonged.”
I could see the pain and ferocious anger churning on his face, in his stance and the way his muscles rippled.
A single tear slipped out of the corner of my eye; the only tear to fall that I would allow.
I was a fighter… now.
Matt’s fingertip caught the tear, startling me.
Yep, I was an O.G. alright.
“Sorry, sweetheart.” He took a step away but stayed fairly close.
It amazed me that he was even out of bed, let alone staying off the narcotics after being shot twice. He was moving around like nothing happened at all. Except for the shift in his facial features as he moved; if you didn’t pay real close attention to him, you wouldn’t notice.
I knew Matt, or so I would like to believe. There was a time I hoped he would be my knight in shining armor. Turns out he was just my idiot in tin foil. The Matt we knew, Taylor and me, was just a façade; a part he played after running from who he really was.
He wasn’t so bad though. I have a feeling the good lord put him in my path for a reason.
“James?” Matt called to me.
“Sorry.” I blinked a few times, surveying them. “Wait, you said they wrote of how they thought they were going to come and get me?”
Matt got a twinkle in his eyes that was mirrored by Luke when he grinned and answered. “Yeah, they think they can come and get you. It ain’t gonna happen of course. You’re ours, a part of this family and we don’t just let go.”
And just as quickly as he answered me, he turned back to the other two. Maybe he wasn’t much of a sharer with the feel goods.
Having not taken his eyes off of me yet, I practically felt his every emotion being shoved through our connection into me.
“With Tommy gone, we are going to have to double down. He’s part of our muscle but his absence isn’t such a detriment that we are sitting ducks. You and I’ll stick around here if that makes you more comfortable since Matt is holed up here.” He paused making me wonder what the other option was.
Staying at his mother’s house? The thought almost made me giggle.
“Or?” I pushed.
Noah let out a sigh and Luke stood.
“Or you can come over to our humble abode.” He smiled from ear to ear, throwing an arm over Noah’s shoulders.
“It’s my house, asshole, you’re just sleeping in it.” Noah warned, throwing his arm off.
“So touchy.” Luke flicked his wrist at his brother, adding a lisp to his speech.
I couldn’t help the laugh that leapt out of my throat. I needed more laughs and between the two of them, I really hoped I could put my mind off of what’s happened and is yet to come.
Matt’s always so broody and dark. A man so sexy should always be grinning and petting puppies. Not that I was such a bright ray of sunshine either – that was Taylor in our group of misfits which was odd seeing as how she really wasn’t a misfit at all. But back to the issue at hand, Luke had just suggested I sleep over at Noah’s house.
The house. Where Noah lived. And slept. Does he sleep naked, normally?
Whoa – that was out of left field. What was this man doing to me?
“Well, I don’t want to impose.”
Yes, I do. That answer was usually enough to guilt a man into anything.
“What do you think, Noah?”
He looked me in the eyes, his gaze so hard it felt like he was penetrating my soul, unlocking all the secrets barricaded into the blackest depths of my brain.
Then he nodded.
He.just.nodded.
This one needed a tow chain attached to his tongue. How was I suddenly the one with more to say?
“Okay, we’ll go play house at Noah’s then.”
I clasped my hands together on my lap and smiled around the room; this was a signature move for business meetings that was sure to signal the end of any discussion. My decision had been made and was not to be questioned.
“Are you sure, sweetheart? I could come, too. Just for the familiarity or another body to keep you company.” Matt winked at me, playing his hand at flirty. Well, where has this Matt been? This Matt, I could handle. This Matt, I knew. He was the first man that I e
ver flirted with, liked or voluntarily talked to for no reason other than being friendly.
Until now.
“I could always use another body to keep me company, boo.” I winked back.
This was our little game for the past four years, since we met. Since before all this hell was set loose upon Taylor’s and my world.
Noah tensed up and all but threw Matt out of the room in a series of expertly executed glares.
You know how nations have their own version of sign language? I was fairly certain men also had their own version. It was like sports sort of, a lot of grunting, grabbing themselves and flinging their arms around.
“I’ll be seeing you, sweetheart.”
I blew him a kiss that he mimed plucking out of the air, putting in his pocket and patting it. Noah slammed the door in his face. From the other side of the door I heard Matt’s hearty chuckle.
“Diesel, closer.” Noah said, staring me down.
“Brace.” His jaw clenched and he leaned down, putting a hand on Diesel’s back.
Luke walked over to him and put a hand on Noah’s shoulder.
“Are you alright?” I jumped out of the bed and ran to stand before him.
His mouth was still clamped shut, his teeth grinding.
“Oh yeah, his back is just a little sensitive. Sometimes he needs a good cracking when he sleeps the wrong way or pushes himself too hard when he works out. Funny things, backs.”
I didn’t believe a word he said but when Noah practically pleaded with me to go get him a hot pack from downstairs, I ran without question.
“Matt, where’s the heat pack?” I called out from the stairs.
“What heat pack?” He popped his head around the wall down at the foot of the stairs, spooking me.
I yelped and he laughed.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart, but your face!” He doubled over and I was tempted to kick him while he was down.
“Heat pack!” I enunciated clearly as I passed him and entered the kitchen. Hitting him would be easy, but I just didn’t get that touchy with people.
Unless of course their name was Noah Kane. Not to say I haven’t touched Matt or other people for that matter but where I was constantly staying vigilant not to have any physical contact with others, I was finding excuses to touch Noah.
“Taylor took the heating pad. If you need heat just grab a water bottle, fill it with hot water and throw a dishtowel over it.”
“How very MacGyver.” I mumbled.
“Calm down with the name dropping. I forgot how hip you were to the t.v. scene these days.”
“Have you decided to stop agenting and become a stand-up comedian?” I quipped.
“Agenting, huh? Millions of dollars, a stellar education and from what you’ve mentioned an English Nazi of a foster mother, all to bring me, ‘agenting’.”
“Don’t make me go Brooklyn on your booty.”
“I cannot take you seriously when you refuse to use any curse words. Say it with me, James. ‘Ass!’”
“Eat dirt.” I narrowed my eyes at him and hauled the makeshift heating pack back upstairs.
Matt’s raucous laughter followed me all the way to my room where Noah was standing perfectly once again.
“Sorry, sug. I didn’t mean for you to go fashion me a heating pack. All better now.” He held up his hands and waved, smiling at me. Megas of watts, Batman.
“Are you sure?” I set the bottle on a small table wedged between the chairs in the corner, noticing that Luke and Diesel were gone.
“Positive.” He took the two steps to me and with his hands still in the air, smacked a kiss on my lips.
It was the most forward any man had been with me - aside from dear old dad’s “friends”. My signature icy attitude had a way of keeping men at more than an arm’s length distance.
“What was that for?” I stuttered, fingering my lips.
“For caring? For being you? Just because? Take your pick, sugar.”
I had never cared much nor participated in spending all of something on one thing – hopes, dreams, wishes, money – but, Noah made me want to put all of it on him; could he be it for me? Could he be the light at the end of my very dark tunnel? Life had never seemed so bright or sweet when he was around. Did it matter that I only knew him for about two weeks? Had it even been two weeks? Life was one big jumble for the past seven months. No matter how long I had known him, Noah was a balm that while there was no cure for my kind of ruined, he could temporarily heal me and that was priceless to me. How long was someone supposed to be acquainted before it was acceptable to say you loved them and wanted to be with them, anyway? I mean, shoot, do I love him? Ironically, one of my favorite quotes was “Only time will tell.”
I had waited this long, I could wait a while longer; if this was it, he’d still be here in four months, six months, a year, whatever. They say love never dies if it’s true.
In my life, I had to be sure. Not because of my career – other players in the game expect me to have a few divorces under my belt already. No, I needed to be certain because of my past. Other people were open books while I’m more like a post it note that reads:
“Caution – severely damaged – irreparable.”
This time, Noah placed his hands delicately on my cheeks. His long fingers splayed and the tips dipped into my hair. I sucked in a breath and my eyes drifted shut as he leaned in and laid his lips on mine. A rush of lust induced waves had me flying high at his touch. The combination of his nearness and his scent had me reeling.
I tilted my head minutely to fit better against him, my hands went to his waist. His two day old beard makings tickled my smooth face, only adding to the intense desire coursing through my veins. If this is how my space heater felt when she shot the cocaine into her veins, I would never question her again. Noah was my drug and I was hooked. If there was a cure, I didn’t want it. Our bodies were clamped together and I suddenly felt my backside bump up against the door. He had me pinned and I wasn’t fighting him.
Is this what I had been missing my whole life as a social pariah? Who gives a flying french stick; I have it now.
After what seemed like far too short a time, Noah pulled back and rested his forehead against mine.
“Is this how you kiss all your women?” I whispered.
How stupid could I be?
Noah’s face soured but he recovered quickly and pecked my lips before answering.
“Never. You’ll see, sugar.”
His words exhilarate me and light my soul on fire.
He pulled away but kept hold to one of my hands, leading me to the bathroom.
“Do what you have to do, I’ll pack for you and we’ll head over to my place. Maybe we’ll stop in and have lunch with ma. Sound good?”
I just nodded, nibbling my bottom lip.
“Good.” He kissed me again, lightly pulling my lip out of my teeth with his own then smacked my rear. “Get movin’, sugar.”
I’d never showered so fast in my life. Though the prospect of going to Noah’s house and staying there, with him, had me debating on using the shower head in ways I’d only read about.
* * *
Packing and rolling out under the threat of unknowns wasn’t something new to me. As I threw clothes into a suitcase and duffle bag, I realized this was the first time I’d ever felt bad that I was possibly ruining designer clothes of the woman I was madly in…something with.
In the military, we are accustomed to a much faster paced way of living; faster paced way of everything honestly. If this was love, I would accept that. Military knew how anything and fucking everything could change in the blink of an eye. Not just one of my buddies met their wives and were married within one to five months; all of them were still going strong, some with little ones running around raising hell. I never said I didn’t want love, I just figured the whole white picket fence, love, two point five kids and all that wasn’t in my stars. If it was, I’d wait another fifty years if I had to. If it was with Jamie
, I was grabbing on to her and holding tight with everything I had. Fuck it, I’ve got Jamie now and I’m not letting go. Screw fate and destiny if this wasn’t what was planned for me. Jamie is mine.
Whenever she’s ready, all she has to do is say “go”. I’ve pulled the trigger for her before and I’d do it again, no matter what context it was in.
I’m only afraid that she’s pure sugar that’ll melt in my hand if I hold her too tight.
My head is so fucked, Freud would blow a gasket.
I smell her before I hear her moving towards me. I’ve got her all packed up and am just waiting on Luke to get here with my truck.
We’ve all got a truck in the garage. What’re you gonna do – we’re all country boys.
When I hear him honk the horn, I hightail it downstairs before I do something Jamie regrets.
She’s got to be absolutely, one hundred and twenty percent sure before I touch her the way I want to. The way I crave to.
Hell, I may just break her.
Or she’ll break me.
After a nice dinner with ma and Luke, we get Jamie set up at the house. I don’t quite have any other spare rooms set up yet so she’s camping out in my bedroom. It’s exactly where I plan on keeping her, but I’ve got the honest excuse that no other bedrooms are prepared for guests right now, so I’m using it.
Because that doesn’t have ‘HORRIBLE IDEA’ written all over it in permanent marker then surrounded by giant blinking arrows and runway lights.
What can I say, I’m an original fucking Einstein.
Jamie takes in my room, surveying it from top to bottom and inventorying every piece. It’s done up in tan, reds and dark blue. My furniture is all dark and my bed an oversized King four poster. Around the four poster lays a thick canopy tied to each post; where my headboard should be high, there’s instead a long sheet of layered fabric with strings of lights giving a soft glow. Beside the bed, she coos at my little buddies before asking if she can draw a bath.
Like I needed that image filling my mind on top of all the others. At this rate, my dick is going to be so hard it just snaps off.
“Make yourself at home. Honestly.” I say before closing the door and smacking my forehead into the hallway wall.
Keeping You: KJ Elite Inc. Page 8