“What’s wrong?” I stop and face her.
She shakes her head vehemently and pulls me into Noah’s and my room. “Not out here!”
After securing the door and checking under every surface, she walked back over to me.
Tears glistening in her eyes, Taylor leaned in and whispered in my ear, “I’m pregnant.”
I don’t think I was supposed to be the one who nearly faints but alas, I need to sit down.
“Are you sure? Does Tommy know? How far along are you? Do you need anything?” I whisper-shout.
Tay sits beside me and takes my hands.
“I’m positive – no pun intended – and Tommy’s the one who told me! He said, ‘Baby, don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re really moody and gaining weight. Plus, you’re always sick. Is there something you want to tell me?’ That’s about when I threw a pack of crackers at his head and burst into tears. We took a test all the way out in Caldwell that said negative, but after two weeks we went to see Jess and she confirmed through blood tests.”
I hugged her tight and squealed.
“Wait. So, how did he take it once it was for real?”
“Oh, Jamie, he’s over the moon. I keep having to stomp on his foot when he opens his mouth. He wants to tell everyone but I wanted to tell you first.”
My heart ached, it physically hurt. Pregnant and stuck underground because of me.
“Stop being a martyr. There are enough of those in this building as it is. I’m beside myself. Be happy with me. Also, I’m two and half months along so we’re gonna have to start shopping soon! I’ll find out in the near future, hopefully my next appointment, what the little belly bean is.”
She’s radiant. I can’t believe I didn’t notice it before.
“Of course! They’ll have the best of everything.”
“I knew their God-mommy would say that.”
My jaw dropped and she wrinkled her nose in amusement.
Tay and I spent the rest of the night watching movies in bed. Tommy brought us ridiculous amounts of food plus I busted open No’s stash of goodies – what Tay left of it. I told Taylor I was going to have to get her a bell to which Tommy shook his head and said a prayer.
I’m pretty sure I passed out with a twizzler in my mouth. The bed dips twice beside me and I open my eyes to find Tommy carrying Taylor out and Noah sitting beside me, watching me.
He smiled and pulled the twizzler out of my mouth.
“Looks like yall sure had some fun.”
“We were celebrating.” I said, shaking my head to clear the fog.
“Is that so?”
I worried my lip as I had an internal battle. I don’t want to spill the beans but I’m so excited I can’t keep it to myself.
“I’m going to be an auntie and a Godmother!” I beamed.
Noah chuckled loudly and laid down, pulling me into his arms.
“I heard the Godfather and Godmother are supposed to be married. Y’know, for good measure.”
The laughter bubbled out, and I said, “Well, that makes sense. Could you point me in his direction?”
“I think I could help you out with that.” He grabs my hand and moves it around like he’s searching for treasure before pointing at himself.
“Tay asked me before TJ pulled her outta here. Also, remind me never to tell you a secret.”
Little trickster was leading me. I pull my hand back and go up one elbow, hitching a brow.
“Hey there. My name’s Jamie, Godmother of first baby Kane. I hear we’re supposed to be married, y’know, just in case.” Unleashing my best, sauciest, sexy grin makes his grin falter slightly.
“The way I heard it was ‘just for good measure’, but I think we’d better heed the warning in either statement.”
His signature smirk has me blinded.
“Oh, of course.”
And now I’m breathless.
“Shake my hand.”
But he doesn’t give me time to ask, “What?” He just shakes my hand.
“Deal. Pleasure doing business with you, future Mrs. Noah E. Kane.”
Is he serious?
“What does the E stand for?” I ask instead.
“I’ll tell you when you say ‘I do’.”
“Uh-uh. Mine is Sue but you already know that. Tell me yours.” I demand, suddenly quite intrigued.
“Is this like, if you show me yours, I’ll show you mine?” Noah made his brows wiggle.
“Sure. Your turn.”
“Didn’t we just establish you couldn’t keep a secret? Besides, I’ve got a much better game in mind.” He purred seductively, burying his face in my neck.
A little nibble and I melted.
“Mmm. No fair.”
“How are you feeling?” His voice was instantly tender.
“Only a little sore. No worse than riding an unpadded bike for an hour.”
His laugh warmed the crook of my neck.
“Well good. We’re gonna try something a little new. If it’s too much, you tell me immediately. Don’t wait to see if you like it. Okay?”
“Okay.”
Noah had both our clothes off in the blink of an eye, priming me with his fingers. I wanted to tell him he didn’t waste any time but every time I opened my mouth, moans increasing in volume escaped.
“Noah. Noah, I ne-need you.”
“You tell me. Got it?”
“Now!” I shout.
Noah situated himself between my legs and I understood what he was talking about.
Hard and fast is what I’m in the mood for but short of tying him down and taking it, he’s not going to rush this. Not right away anyhow.
He had put his piercing back in.
Admittedly so, I’m a little nervous but a thrill runs through me as the head of his penis sits at my entrance; the piercing cold against my heated lips, teasing.
He runs his length up and down me then groans before settling himself and giving a small push.
The bar does in fact catch a little but the idea of having sex with the piercing in is so exhilarating it hardly registers. Going so slow it could be considered cruel and unusual punishment, he finally fills me to the hilt. Noah’s bar rubs against my g-spot eliciting not a moan but a full blown scream from my lungs.
It causes him to stop and pull back so he can look at me fully.
“Keep...going…Noah.”
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
I am so close that words are now beyond me. The sensations I’m experiencing are so deliriously, overwhelmingly amazing, the pain hurts so good.
Instead of assuring him verbally, I wrap my legs around his waist and dig my heels into his perfect butt, shoving him forward. Using my hips, I push forward to meet him, moving in and out at my command in a quicker pace. There’s panting and mewling.
Noah meets my rhythm then doubles it, making our bodies slap together. We move as one, fast and hard like a machine. The minutes go by and these euphoric, decadent sensations make it feel like too much and not enough.
I can’t stop, I need more, I need it all.
“Jesus, Jamie. I’m close, sugar. Come for me, now.”
And I do. As if his words are magic, I come undone beneath his weight, screaming his name like a banshee.
He takes my lips, swallowing my pleas.
The intensity of my orgasm practically causes amnesia.
Noah rocks into me pushing me through it, and to another one in a matter of minutes.
I need him to make me explode again like my life depends on it.
He flips us in a flash so I’m riding him but he holds my weight so I cannot sink fully onto him. Using his own hips, he swirls in a languorous circle. It’s delicious, but I need all of him.
The tip of his bar rubs my spot back and forth, flirting, over and over relentlessly.
“Damnit Noah Kane!” I curse.
The word stuns him enough that I can take advantage and knock one of his arms free, dropping me all the way down his ge
nerous length.
Seated fully, my eyes roll to the back of my head and I cry out his name, grinding against him. Grinding with him.
My head falls back and I savor the completeness I feel. Like we’re two puzzle pieces finally one. I pause to savor the feeling and Noah takes over, increasing the speed so much I have to reach up and grip the headboard. He lifts his hips and voices his release, pounding into me. My chest is level with his face and he takes advantage, stretching his neck up to nip my right nipple then takes it in his mouth, lapping at it to soothe the painful pleasure his bite incites.
All consuming, paralyzing bliss takes over, sending me over that hurdle with Noah.
I collapse onto his chest, panting, gulping in air greedily.
A few random but important thoughts form in my head as we lay here coming down from the high.
“I’m sorry.” I whisper, knowing he can hear me.
“I’m not.” Noah laughed out.
“Not for…that. I’m sorry for running out on you at the first bad news. I wasn’t picking Paulie over you. He’s just…”
I’m struggling for the right words.
“Sugar, I get it. Yall have a shitty past that’s entwined. I won’t lie and say it didn’t hurt but I get it. Plus, I told you I wasn’t letting you go so if I have to go through Paulie so be it.”
Some women might hate that possessiveness but despite my lack of experience with men, I find it incredibly sexy from Noah. He’s willing to fight for me, fight for us and he won’t quit on me. His words and actions aren’t abusive and he doesn’t order me around. On the contrary, he is sweet and delicate with me, asking what I’d like or if I like something. He can claim me all he wants because I’m claiming him, too.
“So, your eye looks a lot better. It’s almost totally healed now.”
Elusiveness and stealth have never been a part of my set skills.
“You trying to ask why I hit Paulie without asking? Just say it, sugar. I knocked the hell out of your childhood boyfriend, and it felt damn good. He had no good reason to have his hands on you like that.”
“He’s not my childhood boyfriend, No. Paulie is one of my best friends just like Taylor, just like Matt. Each of yall have been there for very important and different parts of my life.”
“I still don’t regret it. And I’m not going to apologize.”
“Can you at least keep your hands to yourself from now on?”
His chest jumped and then settled. It would seem we’ve reached an impasse.
“Hey, Noah?”
“Hmm?” His chest vibrates beneath my cheek.
“I’m not on the pill.”
He took a deep, steadying breath before wrapping his arms around me and saying, “Then we better thicken you up faster if you’re gonna have my babies because I’m not preventing putting any more of you out into this world.”
After what Taylor told me, I expected a full blown meltdown. This was almost as nerve-wracking. Am I ready to be a mother? Heck no. Not that I wouldn’t be overjoyed, but I want more time with Noah, and of course to be married first.
Someone knocked on the door three times, methodically like it was a preplanned warning, breaking a weird stretch of silence between Noah and me.
He slides out from under me and slips on a pair of plain black flannel pajama pants and his house shoes.
Walking away he looks at me over his shoulder smirking and says, “So, keep the piercing out then?”
Had there been anything around to throw, other than my underwear, I would have thrown it. It’s a woman thing.
“It sure would be a shame to mess up that pretty face.”
Noah just laughs and laughs.
When he reached the door, I jumped up and booked it to the bathroom. Of course I’m just going to stand here naked, eavesdropping shamelessly.
“Hey what’s up?”
“Just wanted to make sure no one was in here murdering either of yall.” A vaguely familiar voice chuckled. His dad. Who I most definitely do not want to see me naked.
“Nope, just playing scrabble.”
“I’ll just bet. Listen, maybe you ought to step back from the girl until all this is settled.”
His voice is rough and gritty; no doubt a smoker.
And who is he to say anything about our relationship – if that’s what we have. I mean, besides his father. Dangit. His dad doesn’t want us together and that hurts me.
“I appreciate your concern for my virtue dad, but we’ve discussed this, remember? What’s going on between Jamie and me is our business.”
Jeesh. I can hear the resemblance when they are the only voices talking.
“I understand, son, but that girl is fragile. Figured I would try again, with a calmer head. With her, it’s a ‘you-break-it-you-buy-it’ type of deal. And if no one else does, I’ll hold you to that.”
It’s clear to even a stranger that Noah’s father’s tone is not angry and threatening but rather loving and full of promise. I would certainly not want to cross him.
“Dad, that deal’s already been done. There’ll be no breaking here though. Let it be known that when this all wraps up, I’m marrying Jamie Wright; she will be a Kane.”
I gasped in surprise.
“Is that so, boy?” Now his father sounds amused.
“It is, sir. We shook on it and everything.” I can hear the silly grin on his face.
That sneaky little turkey. I know he knows I can hear all of this.
“Well, Kane is much better than what she got hit with. Alright, I’ll let your mama know.”
The door clicked shut, the lock engaged and apparently so was I.
“Come on out, sugar.” Noah said quietly.
With as much dignity as I can muster, I emerge from the bathroom holding up the thing nearest me – a ripped washcloth – to cover my important bits. Needless to say there was some sacrifice on my part.
“So…” I began, leading him to answer all of my unspoken quesetions.
Noah just watched me, not taking the bait. He wants me to say it.
“Engaged, huh?”
“Hey, you asked, I just agreed! I’m innocent in all of this.”
“You? Innocent? Hah!” I threw my head back, imitating his roaring laughter. It felt soul-cleansing, even if I was mocking him.
“I’m glad that amuses you. Seriously though, tell me how you’re feeling because my dad has likely already told ma.”
His expression sobered as he reached for me, tossing the washcloth away from us.
“I don’t know. I mean, I didn’t even know we were dating. We hardly know each other.”
“Jamie Sue Wright, 24, born September 14h, though that could be wrong since Marcus forged those documents. I don’t know your parents real names but to be fair neither do you. Your favorite color is whatever shade my eyes are at the time, your best friends are Taylor Kane, Matthew Carver and Paul E. Paulson and you’d do anything for them. You like sushi, but love steak, think mustard is for fries and ketchup is for dirty dogs. You hate feeling powerless and crave knowledge of all things. When you’re emotional or crazy tired, your accent is so thick it’s like a brick wall. You don’t cuss out of habit but deep down you really love to let a good one fly and you are sick and got damned tired of people treating you like this fragile little piece of china. You’re terrified of dogs because Marcus used all forms of control including abused animals but you love our pup and can’t imagine not having him, now. If none of that tells you how well I know you, then at least let it prove how fucking much I love you.”
He took a breather giving me a chance to say something, or so I thought. Noah covered my lips with the tips of his fingers and continued.
“I might not know every single detail, but I know the big important ones. Let’s start there.”
His fingers were still covering my lips so I lightly bit them.
“Okay, but you have to let me in, too.”
“You’re so in, you’re farther in than I have ever
let myself. You’ve seen pieces of me that no one else has which is why everyone is so worried about you. They’ve never seen me like this before. I don’t do dating or relationships or first names.”
Noah reached out and started running his palms up and down my arms, warming me.
“Let’s go back to bed. You’re freezing.”
I allow him to move me while I process what he’s just said. Diesel huffed at us from his doggy bed.
“You don’t do first names?”
“No, sugar. I don’t normally care too much about the women I fuck, so long as they’re willing and legal.”
He makes it seem so cold and meaningless.
“Let me explain better.”
Pulling the blanket and sheets back, I crawl in and he follows me before covering us back up.
“I never ‘dated’, not even in high school. Being wild and free was so much more appealing to me. Ma called me her free spirit but I know it hurts her. Anyway, I loved the kink and the control. Being a Seal helped keep it all casual since I was always moving. After the accident, I was having withdrawals, battling PTSD and suffering night terrors. It was just another shit hand dealt to another soldier. When I lost my leg, I couldn’t stand the sight of myself, let alone another person looking at me. So I started only seeking out the fast and loose women I knew would let me dominate them. Freaks attract freaks. The blindfolds and restraints were my thing. If I could tie them up, take their sight and fuck them hard, it was a good night. I never stayed for sleepovers or cuddles and pillow talk. 9 times out of 10 I was gone before my come dried.”
God, what he’s describing is drawing out conflicting emotions.
I feel fear and excitement at the thought of him wanting to or asking me to try those things but sadness too, for the women he did that to on top of heartbreak for him feeling the need to do all that; the bondage and abandoning.
There’s also a touch of jealousy. I don’t want to be treated like a rag doll but maybe a little blindfold would be exciting.
“With you though, it’s so different, sug. When we were done, I didn’t care if they started letting guys run a train on them, I was done and out. If another man looks at you, I want to rip out his jugular and shoot him in the balls. There’s no need to fuck and run but there is a need to lay you down and love you all night long. I want to – no, I need to see every emotion on your face while I’m pleasing you, driving you to ecstasy. I want to learn your body inside and out; what you like, love and hate. Mostly though, I want to fulfill your every fantasy and be the only one who gets all of you.”
Keeping You: KJ Elite Inc. Page 22