“No, Frank.” Ellen’s emotional words were buried in him. “I forgot too. I forgot.” She started to cry. “I feel awful. What’s wrong with me? How could I forget my own son?”
“No.” Frank closed his eyes. “You didn’t. You never will.”
“I let him slip from me, Frank, like he meant nothing. I let him slip from me.”
Frank held her tighter. “You did nothing wrong. It’s just hard to face, that’s all. It’s a hard day.”
“I smiled today. I joked around today. I felt happy and I shouldn’t have. Not today.”
“Why not today?” Frank pulled back and lifted her chin. “Why not today? God, El.” He closed his eyes and smiled gently. “I can remember many, many times we laughed on this day. You were the queen of making birthdays happy for your kids. Remember his Halloween birthday party and the time we all went to the zoo for his birthday and it snowed. It snowed in October. We laughed.”
“Does this make me terrible, Frank? Because it slipped my mind?”
“No.” Frank shook his head wiping his hand down her face. “It makes you a person who just is trying so hard to get past the pain.”
Ellen closed her eyes.
Frank laid his lips to her forehead. “Let’s go take a walk, a long walk and talk. O.K.?”
He watched Ellen nod. Without saying anymore, Frank took Ellen’s hand in a tight secure grip. Keeping Ellen near enough to hold, he quietly led her from the house.
Dean stood alone.
<><><><>
Dean hadn’t any idea where Ellen and Frank had gone. He just knew that evening had crept up quickly and he wasn’t about to leave her house until he spoke to her. Even if she didn’t come back until morning, he vowed to be waiting there.
Dean never really liked the song much, but he kept hearing, ‘Peaceful Easy Feeling’, over and over. Maybe it was a sign. Was there something in the words that he should have been paying attention to? Were they telling him something or was Robbie just being annoying, sitting there singing and playing it?
The front door opened, Dean stood up and Ellen walked in alone.
“El,” Dean called her.
She looked oddly at him, her face puffy from crying. “What are you doing here?”
“I need to talk to you.”
“Not tonight, Dean. O.K.?” Ellen moved to the steps and slowly walked up them.
Finally the strumming guitar stopped and Dean faced Robbie.
Robbie set down his guitar. “Well, I guess I’m done.”
“Can I go up and talk to her?” Dean asked.
Robbie shifted his eyes around. “Are you asking me?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“You live here.”
“So I get the decision on whether you go up?” Robbie paused to think. “I guess it would be all right. Sure, Dean, go on.”
“Thanks.” Dean moved to the steps and walked up them. He could hear Ellen’s door shut as he reached the top. Though the door was closed as if she were shutting everything out, Dean knocked anyhow. “El?” He turned the knob. It wasn’t locked. He called through the partially open door. “Can I please come in?”
“Yeah,” she answered.
Dean walked in. Ellen was getting undressed. “I was waiting for you.”
“I saw that. Thank you.” She walked to her dresser and pulled out a large sweatshirt and slipped it on. “Why?”
“Why?” Dean ran his fingers through his hair and shut the door. “I was concerned. And ... I did a lot of thinking.”
“About?”
“Everything. Can we sit?” He pointed to the bed.
Ellen shrugged and moved over.
“How are you doing? Did you and Frank talk?”
“Yes.” Ellen nodded. “We had dinner with Johnny and talked about the kids. I needed to do that.”
“Did it help?”
“Yes.”
“El.” Dean reached over and grabbed her hand. “I told you after what happened with you and Frank, that we would stay friends.”
“I know.”
“And I told you that I wanted to be close to you for the baby’s sake.” Dean took a breath. “See, I hate to admit my father was right, but he was. I was never good with people. I assumed being close was any type of contact you had with someone, whether it be working or just friends. I didn’t have many friends.” Dean looked up to the ceiling. “In fact, I can’t recall anyone outside of work that I associated with the older I got. Anyhow, getting to the point I am taking an awful long time to get to, I told you we’d be friends. And I started out good, right?” He waited for Ellen to nod. “Then I screwed up. I saw myself getting closer to you and I pulled back. I figured as long as we worked together, as long as we communicated somehow, we were close. I was very wrong in that thinking.”
“I appreciate you saying that but you’re forgetting I understand why you’re being like that. I do. I wronged you.”
“And I said we’d be friends. We have a baby coming, El.” His hand reached over and touched her stomach briefly. “I don’t want this kid to grow up not seeing his parents care or know about what’s going on with each other. Not in this world now. I want him or her to see I’m there for you. I just want you to know, I will make every effort to be a friend. Not because I have to, but because I want to. And maybe, just maybe if you need to talk or just to feel better, you won’t have to run to Frank every single time.” Dean released her hand and stood up. “You look tired. I’ll let you rest.” He leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek. “Night, El.”
“Dean,” Ellen called to him as he moved to the door. She waited until he turned around. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” He opened the door and stopped. “El, this may not be a good time but I want you to know, despite how I acted, I really, really loved last night and for more than just the obvious reasons. Good night.” He gave a soft wink and pulled the door closed. He felt so much better, as if he were finally taking that new road he should have been taking with Ellen months before.
Walking quietly from Ellen’s home Dean was more upbeat then a spark of irritation hit him and Dean was ready to kill Robbie. Because in the midst of his short walk next door, Dean found himself, out loud humming that stupid song Robbie had played all night.
A Pause ...
PRESENT DAY
Beginnings, Montana
October 2
It was a drastic cough, one that wasn’t real, and then Dean waved the cigarette smoke from in front of his face frantically.
“Dean.” Frank blew even more smoke his way. “Knock it off or I’m for sure throwing your skinny ass out.”
“Do all of you guys have to smoke?” Dean looked around. “I’m doing a chest x-ray on every single one of you. I hear you cough, Frank.”
“I do not cough.”
“Yes you do.” Dean pointed. “Cough for me right now. Let me hear that chest.”
“Dean.” Frank leaned into the desk. “You aren’t going to ask if you can cup my balls too?”
Robbie started to laugh.
Hal failed to see the amusement. “Why do you insist on picking on this man like a school yard bully?”
“What?” Frank laughed. “I don’t pick on him.”
“Yes, you do,” Hal insisted. “This man is married to Ellen. He should be treated and regarded as family. Not to mention he is a brilliant doctor. And you treat him as if he were nothing.”
“Hal,” Frank spoke with annoyance. “You don’t know.”
“I know enough from what I have witnessed. And, Frank, you soon forgot that he almost gave up his life to come and get you.” Hal was taken aback when Frank scoffed. “You know, sometimes I wonder if you weren’t really adopted like Dad said all these years.”
“Do I look adopted?” Frank asked. “No.”
“Yes,” Hal answered.
“You do, Frank,” Robbie added.
Dean got his comments in as well. “Hal and your Dad look identic
al and Robbie, you can see a lot of Joe in him. Who exactly do you resemble, Frank? I mean you have gray in your hair and ...”
“Dean.” Frank shut him up. “I’ll have you know, I look like my mother.”
“Frank?” Robbie snickered. “I may have been young when mom died, but I don’t remember her being six foot three.”
“Ha, ha, ha.” Frank leaned back in his chair. “I have her features.”
“You do not,” Hal argued. “You’re dark skinned and you have black hair. Mom had brown hair. And ... Dad has dark blonde hair. What color hair did Jimmy have?”
“Dark blonde,” Frank answered.
“Me?” Hal asked.
“Blonde.”
“Robbie?”
“Blonde.”
“And you?”
“Blonde.” Frank ran his hand over his head. “I dye it to be different.”
“You’re an ass, Frank,” Hal grunted in disgust. “Forget parentage. We’ve totally gotten off the subject.”
“It’s Dean’s fault.” Frank pointed at Dean.
“What?” Dean raised his hand. “I merely coughed and stated my concern. You didn’t have to careen off the Ellen subject and to answer your question, Hal.” Dean faced him. “Yes, Ellen did stay that way for a long time, in my history at least. She was good for the first two months and then the reality hit her all over again and she didn’t start to snap out of it for a while, at least a year. Robbie, confirm or deny?”
“In my history.” Robbie had to think. “She got out of it by summer but she was never the same.”
“In my history ...” Frank spoke up and laughed when Dean grumbled at him.
“Do you think one of you originals may be one of the ones working for George?” Hal asked.
Frank shook his head. “It’s Jason and Rev. Bob. Speaking of Reverend Bob, why is he still here if we found out he’s a Hadley?”
Robbie lifted his shoulders in question. “Beats me. Maybe Dad was just waiting for you to come back. I know he wants to finish up and do a full scale investigation.”
“Yep.” Frank cupped his hands. “Can’t solve any dilemma without the brilliant Frank mind.”
Dean rolled his eyes. “Henry is convinced it’s Andrea.”
“No way,” Frank argued. “It’s not Andrea. I don’t care what evidence you have on the woman, it’s not her. And, though she really gets on my last fuckin’ nerve, her intentions are good.”
“Now.” Hal began to speak as he always did, with un-Slagel eloquence. “I find the woman endearing, but has she always been so ... so ...”
“Flighty?” Frank answered. “No.” He shook his head. “She got bad when Dean spayed her.”
“Frank.” Dean swayed his head. “Do you have to put Frank style into every description? I did not spay her.”
“Did too.”
“Did not.”
“Dean.”
“Frank.”
“Dean.” Frank slammed his hand. “When you remove all the female organs from an animal, what is that called?”
“Spaying. But ...”
“I rest my case.”
“Andrea is not an animal,” Dean said. “But according to Joe ...” He tilted his head with a smile.
Robbie let out a disappointing whine. “I really wish you guys wouldn’t talk about our new mom like that. She’s good to me. I like her.”
“Robbie.” Hal faced him. “You liked every mom we had. Can we just stop talking about people negatively and get back to why we’re here. Catching up. Now, I remember when I was in ...”
“Did we ever tell you ...” Frank interrupted Hal. “About the elephant that ran rampant in Beginnings.”
Hal chuckled. “Yeah, sure Frank. I’m gonna believe that one. An elephant in Beginnings.”
“Yes.”
“Right.”
Robbie tapped Hal on the shoulder. “It’s true. It happened in my time frame as well.”
“No, it is not. Dean?” Hal looked at Dean for an honest answer.
Dean tossed his hand up. “I hate to admit it but in my time frame it happened too. Miguel found him on a run and toted him back to Beginnings.”
“No shit?” Hal quickly shifted his eyes about. “What happened to him?” He saw Robbie and Dean point to Frank. “What.”
“Frank killed him,” Dean said.
“Oh I did not,” Frank scoffed. “He died of natural causes.”
“You gave him a heart attack, Frank,” Dean snapped. “You couldn’t get him to move out of the fields when he wandered there, so you thought you’d scare him and you fired your gun right by his head. He lifted on his back legs and died. Remember?”
“Oh yeah.” Frank nodded. “O.K.” He shrugged. “Oh well. He was a pain anyhow.”
Hal had his mouth open in amazement as he just stared at Frank. “Now I have heard everything. I swear there’s something wrong with you.”
“Yeah.” Frank smiled. He grabbed a cigarette and lit it. “Now, getting back to catching up. Where were we?”
“I believe.” Hal held up his hand. “I was just about to talk about myself.”
“No you weren’t.” Frank shook his head, grinned at an annoyed Hal, and began to ramble some more.
Hal gave up. He knew somewhere in true, not true, Frank-time-frame and Robbie-time-frame stories, he would be able to get his two cents in. By the way Frank went on at that moment in the Slagel brother meeting, he wasn’t getting his chance anytime soon. But as far as Hal was concerned, he wasn’t going to worry about it. He was finally back with both brothers and he was going to enjoy the reuniting time they were spending together. Because Hal knew–especially with the way the meeting was going-- it wouldn’t be long before he sought some sort of sanctity from them both.
IN RETROSPECT ... THE FIRST YEAR
Completion
CHAPTER SEVEN
March 20th - Beginnings, Montana
Humming pleasantly, Andrea skimmed her eyes over the small slip of paper with the typed words, ‘Everyday your beauty grows and so does my love for you’. “Oh.” She breathed out. “Maybe tonight.” She giggled, enamored, and laid the piece of paper in a shoe box. With a spark of awe upon her face, her hands rummaged through the many slips of paper that were in the box as well, too many to count. All of them were the same tiny sized paper with typed messages conveying a single sentence of feeling. Small notes that were given to Andrea, one every day, placed anonymously where she could discover them. They always brought smiles to her, just as they did as she gazed in the box. Replacing the lid, Andrea put the shoe box away in the cabinet in the dining room. She checked the table set for two, complete with wine glasses, continued humming a Bobby Vinton Love song, and went into the kitchen to make sure her dinner was cooking to perfection.
<><><><>
“Dad!” Johnny’s voice called into the house. “I’m home.”
Frank shifted his eyes to the alarm clock on the night stand. “He’s early.” He sat up in bed, swinging his legs over the side. “I’ll be down in a second, John.” He watched her slip into her shoes in a rushed, upbeat manner. “You leaving?”
“Yeah. I have to get home. I think Dean wants to head to the clinic.” She grabbed her jean jacket off the foot of the bed and put it on.
“I was going to cook something. You don’t want to stay and eat?”
“I can’t. Rain check?”
“You got it.”
In Ellen’s stride across the bedroom, she picked up Frank’s pants and tossed them to him. “Better get dressed. I’ll see ya.”
Frank caught them. “Thanks for hanging out tonight.”
“Thanks for the talk.” Ellen opened the bedroom door, looked back in, smiled at Frank, and then left. As she hit the stairs, Johnny was walking up. “Hey John.”
“Where’s my Dad?”
“Upstairs.” Ellen told him. “He’ll be down in a second.”
“Bye.”
“Bye, Johnny.” Ellen darted down the steps and stra
ight to the front door. As soon as she walked out she saw Joe. “Hey Joe.”
“Hey Kiddo.” Joe saw where she was coming out. “Everything O.K.?” Joe twitched his head to Frank’s.
“Oh fine. We were just bullshitting tonight. You know us. Preventive therapy.” Ellen shrugged. “Where are you off to?”
Joe walked with her to the next row of house. “Andrea’s and ...” He slowed down. “Her house is dark?”
Ellen looked curiously. “Oh no Joe. It’s not. She has candles lit.”
“She’s probably having trouble with her power. That’s probably why she asked me over.” Joe nodded. “I’ll check it out and see if I need to call Henry.”
“O.K., night.” Ellen separated from Joe and moved to her and Dean’s house. She slowed down, backed up, watched Joe walk into Andrea’s and then looked again. “Candles?” With an ornery snicker, Ellen hurried back and into her house.
“Ellen?” William called out her name seeing the snickering look on her face. “What are you up to?”
“Um, nothing.” She approached William and checked her tiny son which he held in his arms. “How’s Billy?”
“My prodigy is fine.” William leaned down and kissed the baby.
“Where’s Dean?”
“Bathing Alexandra. She’s being fussy.”
“She’s always fussy. They sound so loud too.”
“Well there aren’t any noises in Beginnings. Of course they’re gonna be loud.”
“So it’s not me?” Ellen’s hand reached out and stroked the tiny pouting face of her son.
“No.” William smiled. “Why would you say that?”
Ellen shrugged. “It’s been insinuated that I can’t handle them.”
“What has my son said to you?”
“Not Dean.” Ellen shook her head with a smile. “Someone else. They keep saying if I need them to take the babies, they will.”
“Ah.” William nodded his head knowingly. “Miss Jenny.”
The Next Ten: Beginnings Series Books 11 - 20 Page 10