by Hawk, CJ
Haus turned to Sabrina as if she was the one he was serving. “Miss. I need to turn the limo around in that driveway across the road. Then I will be ready to go when you are. Are you ok here alone?” I watched his eyes glance towards me then back. What did he mean by alone? She was with me. What was I going to do? I could not focus on the house across the dirt road that the limo was parked in front of. My body felt like it was rocking itself in a chair back and forth. Nothing seemed real. I tried to pinch myself to see if I was dreaming, but my fingers did not seem to want to cooperate. I had to be dreaming.
I watched all six feet plus of Haus, his golden curly hair, in his black suit and drivers cap, get back in the limo. I heard the limo start up and then we both watched him expertly turn the limo around on the single dirt lane road with only a small dirt driveway allowing him this privilege.
It all felt surreal. I looked at Sabrina pleading for an answer with my eyes and felt the tug of tears building. Had my worst nightmare come true? A reoccurring one where Sabrina sat poolside; drink in hand, dressed in lavish jewels, in a gorgeous two-piece swimsuit while Mathew stood behind her and rubbed her shoulders telling me I was old news. Sabrina was the one for him now.
Sabrina couldn’t and wouldn’t. We shared so much together. Mathew had a cold heart when it came to business, but he always took care of me, as long as I took care of him, in the sexual sense. Thinking quickly of how I took care of him nicely yesterday in the shower. He seemed more than happy and satisfied. There had been no indication things were going south for us. I was stunned. I wasn't able to speak. I fulfilled my end of the bargain.
“By the look on your face and the drugs I doped you with; you're confused. So let me make this quick because Mathew and I have a plane to catch to the Caribbean mind you, to celebrate our success. See. You my dear are out. I saw Mathew first that night that we all met. I even claimed him, but I guess gentlemen prefer blondes. However, I have convinced Mathew that I will be the better trophy wife to your sorry GED ass.” Her laughter was wicked.
I felt a small amount of bravado. “I won’t let you. I will take Mathew for half, and you can have him. I don’t need you or him, and I can live just fine off half of his sorry ass.” I crossed my arms in front of my chest with the straps of my purse dangling over my shoulder. Then the straps dropped to the crook of my elbow as I tried to stand up gracefully. I was like a bull in a china shop.
“You are dumber than I realized. See behind you and the land you stand on, is where your sorry ass is going to live. The money in your purse is all you have to live on, and you divorced your husband weeks ago claiming you wanted nothing in return. See I was you and I filed for you. Starting to see the picture? Me, pretending to be you and start to look like you has been a three-year plan. Haven't you ever noticed how easily people got us confused?” Her laughter filled the air. I remembered back to when Sabrina was thirty pounds heavier than me along with a full head of chestnut brown hair. I shuddered at the difference, now that I was staring at her with the new information.
Haus got out of the limo and opened the back door for her. His eyes were screaming I’m sorry. With Sabrina’s back to him, I knew that would change as soon as she looked at him. Christ she had even slept with Haus, claiming him as a victory. Making me vow to never tell. Now I would. Damn why hadn’t I saved any of her sleazy texts where she damned Mathew and would try to get me to steal from him and leave him. As far as I was concerned, as the picture was taking shape, I didn’t need to pinch myself. This nightmare was my reality, but she could have him. As far as being flat out on my ass, I was going to be just that.
I watched Sabrina drop a single key, on a smiley face key chain, right on my newly polished toes, in my adorable flip-flops, that I picked out for the trip.
“So long sweetheart. Enjoy your humble abode.” The snap of her fingers sparked in the air. Within ten seconds, they were gone. I turned to look at the rundown cottage and realized that my entire luggage, six pieces of it, was sitting on the front porch with a missing step. My formals for the one night of fine dining, I packed several since I can never make up my mind. My gazillion swimsuits so I wouldn’t regret packing the perfect one. My makeup and hair kits in the luggage and everything in them, cost more than the fake boobs Sabrina was wearing.
I saw a note taped to the front door. I took the porch steps carefully and ripped it off the holey screen door. A neatly typed note that anyone could have written on a computer was trembling in my hands.
Klarissa,
Darling, this may all be a shock to you, but it is for the best. I have a small bank account set up for you in the town down the hill from this house. See darling, Sabrina has saved all those nasty little e-mails you sent her about stealing from me and fake photos you produced to have me look as if I was gay. We know I am anything but. Sabrina will be my wife now, and as long as you keep your mouth shut and stay away from the tabloids; I will deposit your living expense into the bank account. Stay out of Denver, stay out of our circle of friends, stay out of sight, and you will stay alive. Speak any of this to anyone and you will pay dearly. It would do you good to go back to school and start a new life far away from us. The pictures Sabrina showed me of you with other men, was the final straw. I gave you a lavish life in exchange that you be my obedient wife. You failed me as you had failed your best friend. I wish you luck in your new life. Sabrina will have your things packed and shipped to you when we get back from the Caribbean.
Mathew
Well, if that did not beat all. The bitch’s degree in psychology paid off after all. I had shown her how to use that photo-editing program in the first place to make jokester pictures of each other. God how could I have been so stupid.
I watched a tear fall from my face to the type written letter and wanted to rip it to shreds. However, I intended to keep it and fight. I intended to show it to the tabloids. I… had nothing to show but the letter, and I was sure if Sabrina was able to pull off the divorce as me, I could consider myself screwed. She probably set up the account as me and bought this house as me.
I stepped back down off the porch and picked up the key on the smiley face chain. “Nice touch.” I said aloud to no one. As that was how I felt at that very moment, a no one.
I opened the creaky screen door and slipped the key into the front door lock of a wooden door that had seen better days. It turned with ease, and I opened the door and felt like I stepped back in time to more years than I could count. It was a small-roomed cottage that looked like it was out of the early 1900s. The only indication that it was lived in the last two hundred years was the plaid couch and the duck and geese decorations on the wall, along with the peeling wallpaper.
I stepped back outside and let the screen door slam shut. I saw a porch swing at the end of the porch, hidden from the front of the road by tall unruly bushes that had several leaves to hide behind. I sat on the swing and dropped my purse at my feet. I began to cry loud wailing sobs uncontrollably.
As some time had passed, whatever drug Sabrina had given me had worn off, but the pounding headache still presided in my head. I had a feeling it was going to be there for some time until something worked its way out.
Chapter Two
The sound of tires crunching on the dirt road had me still myself on the swing. Could this all have been a very nasty joke? Were they back? I peeked through the weedy bush while hiding on the porch and saw a black Range Rover, on large tires, turn into the driveway at the house across the road. You could barely see the house as it was set back among trees and professionally hidden by nice landscape. A far contrast to this house or shack as it appeared sitting right on the road.
Thankful for the unruly bushes I was hiding behind, I watched the Range Rover disappear down its driveway to the back of the house. For minutes, I heard nothing. Not even the sound like a car door slamming. I sat myself back down on the swing. I began to move myself in a rocking motion and wondered if my neighbors would be friend or foe. I wondered if the sight of my expensive luggage
on the porch was as much a shock to them as it was to me.
I finally heard a faint car door slam among the whispering leaves, then nothing. No person or persons came my way. I was relieved, as I had no way to explain why I was here.
I tried to soak in my surroundings. The colors of fall were just beginning to show on the outer edges of all the aspen leaves surrounding the area. It seemed as if the house was up towards the top of the dirt road.
Several minutes passed and nobody ever showed. I couldn’t blame them. This house looked like it should have been condemned years ago and torn down for something prettier to be built.
The sun had moved further into the horizon, and it seemed like it was at least three o’clock. The sounds of my grumbling tummy echoed throughout the porch. I doubted that any food possibly existed in the house. I was afraid to go in and look. I reached down to the old faded gray porch and picked up my purse. Inside laid my wallet with the thousand in cash I took out just for the trip and shopping. Now it was going to have to last me until I could figure out what to do next.
A small pink envelope was inside my purse. I reached in and opened it. It was a generic card with a scene of flowers and a puppy. The kind of card you would buy in a box of a dozen of cheap cards. A small note in a man’s handwriting appeared inside the card. “I’m very sorry. Haus” I was stunned. Perhaps Haus knew all along. I doubted he kept these kinds of things handy in the car. If he did, he was a sensitive man. From the stories Sabrina told me and my experience, he was anything but.
A MasterCard gift card was nestled between the card and envelope. That confirmed my suspicions that he knew all along. It didn’t say how much was on it. I wasn't going to expect much seeing as Haus was a paid employee of my husbands, and he didn’t exactly pay the top pay rate. Then, on the other hand, how much money did he make in this little stunt to keep his mouth shut?
The small acknowledgement did warm my cold heart. However, it did not stop my tummy from grumbling. As if in robotic mode, I began to lift my luggage into the house and set about exploring my new humble abode. A sudden movement of eight long legs stopped me quick in my path. I squashed it within a flick of a moment. The one thing I hated most was spiders. The second thing was dust and cobwebs. The humble abode held more of those then I could digest. I ran looking for the bathroom to puke. Only to find a nonfunctioning toilet full of old pee.
Damn that Sabrina. She had bought a house that squatters had lived in. That or she had peed in it herself. Just at that thought, my stomach contracted. The puke ended up in the sink. I quickly reached for the old-fashioned nozzle to turn on, and I was thankful that the water worked.
Upon further inspection of the small house, I discovered broken glass on the backdoor. It must have been how the squatters or wild teens had gotten in and out of the house. It was dirty. It was small, only one bedroom and one bathroom if you could call it that. It had a small kitchen and laundry room off the back of the house. The largest of living space was up front, and it was smaller than my dressing room back home. It was a joke. It had to be. They would come back tomorrow. No one could be this cruel.
I quickly texted both Mathew and Sabrina. “Joke? Right?” I closed the lid to the toilet, and sat down and waited. I stared at my phone with only two bars hoping the signal stayed strong, and they would text me back that Haus was on his way to get me. I waited minutes that felt like hours, and my phone vibrated a text back and then again. With much trepidation, I read the messages from both. “No joke good luck” Sabrina. “Good riddance” Mathew. Seriously?
“GAH!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. I took a deep breath and realized my worst fears had come true. Deep down, there had been signs I had chosen to ignore. Little bits and pieces were coming together like a difficult bazillion piece puzzle.
I pushed myself off the toilet with my hands to my knees and went in search of a breath mint in my purse. I chewed feverishly then went in search of my toothbrush, toothpaste and mouthwash. I hadn’t thrown up since I had the flu last winter. Memories of Sabrina by my side, day in and out, came to mind then I mentally took a red sharpie marker to her face and scribbled her out.
All the happy memories I had of her, were now jaded by the fact she had ulterior motives. I could fight this and try to convince Mathew. She was always quicker and smarter than me. Yet, a small part of me was glad. It wasn't the dreamiest or the most romantic of marriages. However, it was better than my life before. It wasn’t the money and lavish things so much as I was going to miss the security that I wasn’t on my own anymore.
I had to buck up and think of this as an adventurous camping trip. I had to find the silver lining in the clouds, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. I had to realize that my options were few and that my first priority is food because the sound of my stomach grumbling had just gotten louder.
The search of the cabinets came up empty, only dead bugs and cobwebs. The laundry had a closet full of stuff, old broom, dirty mop, a few cleaning supplies and rags. A note hung on the mop. “Have fun!” It was in Sabrina’s handwriting. I had to wonder what I did that was so mean to her that made her be this cruel.
The old washer had seen better days and there was no dryer. A clothesline in the backyard among the tall weeds caught my eye out the laundry room window. Sabrina had to of picked this house with the cruelest of intentions. She knew my hatred for laundry and cleaning. The small closet, in the bedroom with no bed, had old linens in it and several dead moths. This most likely meant the linens were full of holes.
The front room had an old looking, black and dusty, fire-burning stove with no wood around. Probably what heated the house? The couch smelt funny, and all the windows had a fine layer of dust with the lightest of sheer curtains covering the windows. I wouldn’t be able to last here a week let alone a cold mountain winter.
The fast thought of driving into town entered my mind to get my bearings until I realized I didn’t have a car. I didn’t see a garage, and I doubted that they left me one in fear I would jump in and drive back to Denver, exposing them for the weasels they had become.
I wrestled with the thought of introducing myself to my new neighbors but at that very moment, I was embarrassed and sick with grief and despair. The lurching of my stomach indicated I wanted to throw up but there was nothing in my stomach. The pounding inside my head seemed to have gotten worse, and I was sure I felt the slight sway of my body like it wanted to collapse onto the floor.
I slowly sank to the floor with my back to the wall facing the front door. I sat there for minutes crying empty tears and wondering what my next step should be. I hadn’t talked with my parents since I ran away to Vegas to strip. I was just shy of my eighteenth birthday, a virgin. Yet, anything was better than a mom on drugs and a dad who was drunk all the time.
Back then, my body screamed sex with any man who looked at me due to my full figure, long blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. Or so, I was told. I hadn’t seen a lot of options back then, so I used what I thought was my advantage.
In my mind, I didn’t see me running back to mommy or daddy. The last phone call I had made to them left me with the discovery of a disconnected phone. I felt that was a sign that I shouldn’t go back.
Looking back it was easy to see how Sabrina and I hooked up. She acted like an older sister and mother figure.
Then Mathew came along and offered to take care of me. Giving me all the love and affection I craved along with lavish gifts and an offer of a lifestyle I never imagined I could have. Once we were married, things were always good, as long as I kept his high sexual appetite sedated and myself in tiptop shape physically. My credit cards had no limit; my best friend was always welcomed in his home, and his friends became mine. Or so, I assumed. I was sure they wouldn’t give me the time of day now.
The sun was starting to get lower, and I knew if I was going to get into town and back with a few essentials, I needed to start out now. I eyed my luggage with my yoga and snorkeling gear. I had really looked forwar
d to our snorkeling excursion. I crawled on my knees and quickly entered the combination to the luggage lock. I popped it open and tossed the lock on the floor. I unzipped the luggage and found my yoga top and pants. I undressed in the front room. I wasn’t worried if someone could see in if you couldn’t see out from all the dust and grime on the windows.
I found my running shoes and a pair of ankle socks, and set myself out for what would be a short journey to town. I didn’t bother locking the door. At that point, I was hoping to find a motel/hotel in town, and I would stay there until morning. With my wallet and phone in my small black sports backpack, I set out of my new humble abode for any site of human life.
Chapter Three
I began walking at a fast clip downhill. The road was steep going down, so walking back up would be a challenge with a lot of groceries. I began making a mental list in my head as to what I would need. A good bottle of wine was going to be worth its weight to carry. I had some sorrows to take care of. Forget health food. I was on a warpath that didn’t involve men or slender waists. I could now eat what I wanted when I wanted, and not get judged for a pound gained. I smiled at that thought and felt a warm sensation fill my body with hope. I rounded a bend in the road, and it opened wide to a valley below. It was breathtaking.
The rolling hills that intertwined into a valley river below filled with aspen trees of green and yellow shades, coloring the landscape. The tall intermingling pine trees were lush with green fir tips, and the river sparkled with clear dark-blue water with the late day sun starting to cast golden stars of light off the bending river.
I took a deep yoga breath in, and stretched my arms over my head and slowly let it out as I let my arms sink to my sides. I felt alive in a new and unusual way. I didn’t feel so helpless and alone anymore. I didn’t think Sabrina would understand my love for the fresh mountain air. It ran parallel in first place to my desire to sit on a beach and let the ocean lap at my toes. This place might not be so bad after all.