I get to choose.
Artemis chose me over her own future. And I know what she would tell me to do. Maybe this is part of the prophecy. I don’t care. I refuse to believe that I have to choose death to save people. If I can be a hunter and a healer, a Watcher and a Slayer, it proves that life isn’t binary. There’s always another way out there, and no matter what, I’m going to find it. If I’m a Slayer, my choice is to use everything I’ve been given to protect those I love and to protect those I’ll never even know.
At that thought, I relax.
Eve can take what she wants from me now. And then, powers or no powers, I will make her regret it.
• • •
I feel Eve, hands on my chest, somehow sinking past the skin and bones and muscle. Past the organs, to something that hadn’t always been there. I know the contours of the power as she touches it. It’s the first time I’ve truly understood it, bright and burning, flooding my body.
In that moment, I know what I’m losing.
I take one last deep breath, holding on to the feeling of life. Of a connection to other girls across the globe, each with her own messy life and her own tremendous potential. Of power—power so deep and dark I could dive into it and never find its limits.
Eve tugs, the light fighting to stay. It curls, clinging to me, burning me in protest. My Slayer instincts roar up, demanding I fight. But I don’t resist. I hold Artemis’s face in my mind.
And I let it all go.
32
“NINA! NINA, WAKE UP! PLEASE wake up!”
Everything hurts. I don’t want to wake up. But Artemis is scared. I peel my eyes open, then cough. I cough so long and hard I can’t draw a breath. When I’m about to pass out again, I manage to stop long enough to breathe.
I’m . . . weak. So weak. What had been my normal before stands in such stark contrast to being a Slayer that I honestly don’t know how I ever moved. How I survived feeling like this for so many years.
I gasp, finally getting enough air that lights aren’t dancing in my vision. Artemis helps me sit up. She’s on the floor next to me, her knee at an angle a knee is not supposed to be. My back is against my nightstand.
“Where is she?” I croak, eyes darting in panic around the room, searching every shadow.
“She demanded to know where Mom went. She wants Mom’s book so she can get to other Slayers in case she needs more power.” Artemis grimaces, holding her knee. “Eve said she’d kill Imogen and the Littles, so I told her about Naked Grains. I’m sorry.”
“Did it work? Did she get my power?” I know the answer. I feel it in every inch of my body, but still I ask.
Artemis’s hand trembles as she smooths back my hair. “It worked. She mentioned something about her husband again. He was trapped in a hell dimension when the portals closed. Nina, I think—I think she’s going to use your power to open up a hellmouth.”
I stand, swaying woozily. Everything feels trembly and disconnected, like I haven’t eaten in three days. I fight back nausea, and I fight back a deep sorrow, a piercing sense of loss for something I was only beginning to truly accept. But Slayer or no Slayer, people are in danger. “If she gets to Naked Grains—”
“Mom,” Artemis says.
“And Honora,” I add, my voice soft. Because as much as I hate her, I don’t want her to die. And I really don’t want Artemis to go through that. Plus, once Eve gets what she wants there, there’s no telling who else she might hurt or kill. And we for sure do not want a hellmouth under her control.
“What do we do?” Artemis is looking to me for help. For guidance. And for the first time in years, I’m going to be the strong one for her.
I grab two stakes and use them to splint her knee. She hisses in pain, but then she stands, able to put a little weight on it. “Meet me at the garage,” I say. I take a small notebook from my collection and shove it into my pocket, then run into the hall—which makes my head spin. I slump against the wall until I can move again. And then I speed walk instead of run to Imogen’s door.
“What is it?” She’s still in pajamas, a bag of Cheetos in her hands, the three Littles lounging on their stomachs around a television.
“Do you trust me?” I ask. Imogen nods, her eyes narrowing as she sees how serious I am. “Okay, so Eve is a demon, she stole my Slayer power, she’s gonna open a hellmouth if we don’t stop her, and if she comes back here, no one is safe.”
Imogen blinks once. Twice. Then she drops the Cheetos and claps her hands. “Hey, kiddos! It’s a field trip day!”
The Littles jump up, squealing.
“We’ll go to Cillian’s,” I say. “Rhys is there. Cillian can take you all somewhere safe. Somewhere we don’t know about.” In case Eve gets to us. Better that no one can betray where the Littles are.
“Can you drive?” Imogen grabs a duffel bag from a trunk by the door.
“Stake me.” I slap my forehead. I never learned, and neither did Rhys. Artemis can, but with her knee injured, I don’t know if she’ll be able to.
“Jade!” Imogen shouts as the Littles scramble to put on their shoes. George Smythe, my favorite with his mop top of curls and enormous eyes, is pulling on rain boots over footie pajamas.
Jade stumbles out of her room. “I just got back to sleep. I’d like to note that no one bothered telling me Cillian was fine! I burst into his house ready to fight, but you and Artemis had already left. Then Rhys cussed me out for waking Cillian up!”
“Demons!” I shout. “Immediate threat!”
“Fine.” Jade glares sullenly at me.
“I’m driving,” Imogen says. “Jade, you’ll be in charge of the Littles. If we aren’t back by the end of the day, we aren’t coming back. Nina will text Cillian if we survive. There’s fifty thousand American dollars in this bag. If we die, take them far away and live a happy life.”
Jade looks briefly alarmed, then she takes the duffel Imogen hands her. “Cool. All right.”
I smile falsely at little Thea Zabuto throwing herself against my legs. “Jade, please go tell Ruth and Wanda that Eve’s a demon and we’re going to fight her. They can do whatever they want. Then meet us at the cars.” I allow Jade a second for that to wash over her, then I push her down the hall and help Imogen usher the three Littles into the back of the Range Rover.
The last Little has been lifted into the backseat when Artemis and Jade both make it over to us.
“Old Crone Zabuto said she’ll die protecting the library. Wanda demanded the money so she could ‘safeguard’ it.” Jade smiles wickedly. “I gave her a swift kick in the arse instead. And then an extra one for good measure. So I kind of hope you guys lose, because I think I won’t be welcome here anymore.” She climbs in the back. The Littles crawl over the seats, thrilled to be leaving the castle. I know we should have car seats or something for them, but that’s the least of our worries right now.
George beams at me. “This is the best day ever!”
“Right,” I say. “The best.” Also maybe the last.
Imogen drives as fast as is safe. Probably a little faster. We squeal to a stop in front of Cillian’s. Jade herds the Littles into Cillian’s car, shouting to Rhys and Cillian what the situation is. I watch as Cillian and Rhys embrace fiercely. Rhys whispers something in his boyfriend’s ear. Then Rhys climbs into our car as Cillian climbs into his, and after one final look between us, we drive in opposite directions.
I have to focus on what we’re going to do, because even the idea of facing off against Eve is less horrible than thinking about what I’ve lost. What I let her take away from me. So I take stock of our arsenal.
Imogen—untrained, a glorified nanny.
Rhys—a budding Watcher more suited to research than fighting.
Artemis—injured and barely able to walk.
And me—not a Watcher. And now not a Slayer.
Off to save a world threatened by the very power I’d been given to protect it.
33
“SO, UH, WHERE’S LEO?” RHYS asks af
ter a few minutes of tense car silence.
“Leo’s part demon.” I stare out the window. Every passing tree marks a second lost, a minute lost, maybe the chance to save my mother and also quite possibly the world . . . lost.
“I know. He told me.”
Leo said something about asking Rhys, that he’d explain things. But I didn’t believe him. “He did?”
“That’s why we tried to make you come over. We needed to get you out of the castle without Leo’s mom knowing. If she knew, she would have come after you. He wanted you safe.”
I’m leaning halfway between the driver and passenger seats, lunging for Rhys. “When did he tell you this?”
Rhys holds up his hands. “Whoa, don’t kill the very helpful and much beloved messenger. He showed up right after you left this morning. Told us that his mother was a succubus, turned into one by his father. Who’s an incubus. And not the band, which would be a much preferable option at this point. Leo knows his mom isn’t great, but he says she’s always been nonlethal before now. And he kind of needs her to survive. She can pull energy from anything, but he can only get it from her. After they lost access to his dad, she’s gone off the deep end. He was trying to make sure she was okay, but she was sneaking around killing things. Anyway, Leo’s what’s known as a cambion. They have varying powers, depending on the combination, but one thing is always the same: gravity recognizes that they come from somewhere else and tries to pull them back down. That’s why the car guzzled so much gas when he was in it.”
“And why I couldn’t knock him over.”
“Yeah.”
“He told you this himself?”
“Brought me a page of a book on cambions. He ripped the page right out, which was difficult for me to forgive. But he wanted to help you, even though he’s part demon. And by the way, what is it with you girls and demons? Buffy and the soul vamps, you and a cambion. Is it a Slayer thing?” His smile fades as he sees the stricken look on my face. As he remembers that I’m not a Slayer anymore. Not really.
So Leo wasn’t one thing or the other. No wonder we had been drawn to each other. I was not quite a Watcher but not quite a civilian. And even when I was a Slayer, I had too much Watcher in me. Too much of an instinct to protect instead of slay. Never all one thing, and therefore having no place to belong.
I didn’t realize I could be both until it was too late.
“Anyway,” Rhys rushes on, “Leo and his mom came back to the castle to get information to try and break through to his father. He thought it would help his mom get back to normal. But then when Eve found out you were a Slayer, she decided to stay. Leo made her promise she wouldn’t touch you. When she killed Cosmina, though, Leo knew he had to get you out. He was tracking his mom earlier this morning, but he lost her. That’s when she attacked Cillian, to distract you and keep you away from Leo.”
“So he really was trying to protect me?”
“Yeah.” Rhys shrugs apologetically. “Where is he?”
“I left him in the woods.”
Rhys’s eyes widen. “Did you kill him?”
“Gods, no. I just got him super high with Doug’s dirty old shirt.” I lift a hand to rub my aching forehead. My fingers tremble. I can barely keep my head up. “Then his mom attacked me. And she won.” I turn back to the window. So Leo was trying to help me after all. But he still lied to me. And he knew all along what was going on. He let me run in circles, suspecting my own mother when his was the evil one. My heart hurts almost as much as the rest of my body.
Artemis reaches between the seats, takes my hand in hers, and squeezes. I don’t regret sacrificing my power to save her. But I can feel the loss everywhere, and it’s so hard not to sink down and cry.
“What’s the plan now?” Rhys asks.
I wait, but no one answers. He’s talking to me. Artemis too is waiting for my plan. They finally trust my instincts, now that I have no power to back them up. Fantastic. Still, I’m a Jamison-Smythe. I’m not totally defenseless. And I’m going to fight with everything I have left. “Eve’s a demon. We’re Watchers. We’ll do what Watchers do best.”
“Research?” Rhys says.
“Babysit?” Imogen offers with a wry eyebrow.
“Spar,” Artemis says bleakly, gesturing to her knee.
“No. We kill the demon. Save the world. Protect the Slayers, even if they don’t know we’re doing it. Even if they don’t care. Eve’s not touching any more of us.” I pause. “Them, I mean.”
The rest of the ride is silent.
• • •
Imogen makes it to Naked Grains in record time. I hope we’ve beaten Eve, until I see a familiar matching Range Rover parked next to the motorcycle my mother must have ridden here.
They’re both inside.
We hurry through the parking lot, vacant this long before the store opens. The front door has been smashed in. Glass glitters in the morning light as we step gingerly over it. The rest of the store is untouched. Waiting.
I take them through the tea aisle. “Hold up,” Imogen says, studying the labels. She grabs a fistful of “Dreams of My Enemy’s Weakness” and shoves it in her pocket, then another fistful of something called “Sleep like Death.” That, she keeps clutched in her hand.
We continue on. The employee room door handle has been shot off. I push it open. No one is inside. The door to downstairs is open as well.
We creep down the spiral staircase and into the big room of demons. They’re agitated. Some are moaning, some growling, some pacing back and forth in the tiny confines of their cages.
I hear a voice, too far to make out the words. But close enough to know the tone. “Eve’s here,” I whisper. “And we don’t have any weapons.”
“Actually.” Rhys stares in wonder throughout the room. He gestures to the rows and rows of cages. “We do. Imogen, come with me. Let’s figure out how to open these up.”
“All of them?” She leans close to the nearest cage. A snakelike demon slithers to the bars, sticking out a purple tongue.
Rhys tugs her backward. “That one eats bone marrow. Children’s bone marrow. It will stay in its cage. But some of these are relatively benign breeds. I suspect they’ll help us in exchange for their freedom.” Rhys beams at me, pushing his glasses into place. “I told you my demon encyclopedia was going to come in handy someday.”
“I never doubted you.”
“What are you doing here?” Sean stalks up to us. “Did you do that damage upstairs?”
I shake my head. “No, that would be the succubus here to end the world. Or it might have been my mom. I’m not actually sure who broke the doors.”
“We need to release some of the demons,” Rhys says.
“Like hell you do!” Sean glares. “I was generous last time. You’ll not find me so kind this—”
I punch him in the face.
“Ouch,” I hiss, mindful we need to keep our voices down. “That really hurt!”
“It hurt him more.” Artemis gestures to Sean, slumped unconscious on the floor. She sounds . . . impressed. I try not to let it go to my head.
Rhys reaches into Sean’s slick suit jacket, pulling out a master key. “Bingo. Come on, Imogen. I’ll tell you which ones we need.” They hurry off in the opposite direction of the voices. Artemis and I head toward Eve.
We’re nearly to Sean’s office when Honora slides backward along the floor, slamming into a cage and slumping brokenly to the ground.
“No!” Artemis limps to her.
“Nina, Artemis! Run!” Our mother gestures with her gun back toward where we came from. A shadowy form grabs her by the waist and throws her against the wall. The form sharpens, and suddenly Eve is standing in front of us.
“Did you not understand my generosity in leaving you alive?” she asks me, incredulous. “I did it for Leo’s sake. I do try to be a good mother. But you’re making it difficult.”
Honora presses something into Artemis’s palm. Artemis pops it in her mouth and stands, cracking her
neck and flexing her fingers. She rips off the splint, taking a stake in either hand. Then she launches herself at Eve. She’s a flurry of fists and kicks. Eve shifts and moves like smoke, but Artemis moves just as fast. Not knowing what Artemis took worries me, but right now we need every advantage.
I hurry to our mother. She presses the address book into my hands. “We’ll keep her busy. Get out of here.”
Artemis flies across the room, slamming into Honora, who does her best to catch her. There’s a gash across Artemis’s side; her shirt is already slick with blood. More is pooling out on the floor.
“Artemis!” I scream.
“Enough,” Eve snaps, her voice distorted. If she was shadows before, now she is night. She is dreams and nightmares and darkness personified. My power is like a cloak on her shoulders, pulsing and seething.
Without another word, Eve punches a hole right through reality.
34
ONE OF US WOULD MEND the world, and one of us would break it.
I kneel on the floor next to my mother, watching the hole Eve made in the world using my power. It starts small, but the air blurs around it, cracking and shimmering. And behind the hole, nothing. No, not nothing. Like the magical purple flames from my nightmares, only worse. I can’t make my eyes look at it. They refuse. The darkness burns within the hole. It’s hungry.
And something is moving there. A hand reaches through, grasping Eve’s. If Eve is shadows, this hand is tar. She didn’t start out as a demon. Whatever Leo’s father is, he definitely did.
She croons with delight. “Only a little longer, my love.” She releases the hand, then grabs either side of the hole and pulls. It tears slowly in protest as our world resists giving way to hell. But it’s losing the battle.
“Why?” I ask.
She laughs. “This is the only way in or out of the world now. Everything that comes through will have to go through me. Nothing will happen unless I let it. I’ll be the ultimate Watcher.” She tugs again, straining, and the hellmouth opens a little more. The waiting darkness writhes in anticipation.
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