Given all of her knowledge of the castle’s defences, Katie was very, very curious, and perhaps a touch concerned, when alarms started going off everywhere. Her master had designed those to trigger if someone ever found their way through the magic protecting the castle. Well, someone finally had.
“She always does this!” Timmy covered his face with his hands. “She has no concept of subtlety whatsoever. She reminds me a little of you, Avraniel, except with more tact, less fire, and far fewer corpses.”
“Hey, idiot, don’t compare me to some prissy member of the Council.” Avraniel growled and stabbed her fork into a piece of chicken. “She’s probably some shrivelled up, old hag who has nothing better to do than throw her weight around.” Her jaw clenched. “I hate jerks like that. I burn jerks like that.”
“Master,” Katie murmured as her rat moved to stand on her shoulder, an arrow at the ready. “What’s happening? How is she getting through?”
“The castle’s defences are more than enough to keep most people out. Vicky,” Timmy said, biting off each syllable as he poured himself some wine. “Is not most people. If you think of a strong member of her order as a boulder rolling down a hill, then Vicky is more like an entire mountain crashing down.” He chuckled. “Trust me, you’ll understand. If those alarms are going off, she should be here any second now.”
And about seven seconds later, she was.
Katie was used to a lot of unusual things happening around the castle. In fact, she’d come to expect them. Whether it was her master’s latest creation running amok and trying to kill him or steal his breakfast – the latter tended to annoy him more than the former – or her ninja rats picking a fight with one of the castle’s zombie cats, strange things happened regularly enough that they no longer bothered her. The presence of Gerald and Avraniel had only made things that little bit odder.
Gerald’s part of the castle was full of the things he’d brought using his magic. She’d even seen a pogo stick there once, along with a box of old documents that appeared to be related to the attempted importation of illegal devices of an intimate nature although the documents didn’t provide any details apart from a long, long list of the injuries that people had suffered after the settings on the device proved faulty – and explosive.
Avraniel had seized a portion of the castle for herself, and she’d been busy decorating it in a style guaranteed to give any respectable elf a heart attack. That meant metal and pointy things everywhere, lots of fire, and what seemed to be plans for how to empty the vaults of the elves’ largest, most important bank – plans that included a layout of the bank that Katie was certain the elf had swiped from Gerald.
Setting all of that aside, Katie could honestly say that she’d never seen a glowing woman seemingly made out of pure light walk through the wall of the dining room and sit down at the table like she’d been there all along before. This wasn’t one of the ghosts or wraiths that haunted the castle. This was someone she’d never seen before: a woman roughly her master’s age with fine, aristocratic features that somehow managed to convey a sense of utter serenity and utter amusement at the same time, along with a healthy dose of kindness and warmth. Katie had imagined, now and then, what her perfect older sister would look like, and this woman fit the bill exactly.
The glowing woman glanced around the table briefly – which was more than a little disconcerting since her eyes were nothing more than pools of white light – before dimming her blinding glow to a more comfortable level and giving Timmy a wry smile. “It’s been a while, Timmy. You still put far too much pepper on your chicken.”
“It’s my castle, Vicky. I can put as much pepper on my chicken as I want.” And then, just because he could, Timmy put more pepper on his chicken. Katie bit back a giggle as he lifted some to his lips and did his best to pretend to enjoy it. There was so much pepper on it that she could smell it from across the table, and her rat sneezed.
“Okay.” Avraniel pointed at the glowing woman. “There appears to be some kind of killer, glowing ghost at the table. Do you want me to blast this damn thing now or –”
In one of the most foolhardy displays of courage that Katie had ever seen, Gerald vaulted over the table and tackled the elf before she could lob any fire at their visitor. Avraniel was caught completely off guard, but it only took her a moment to get her bearings again, regaining her balance and shoving Gerald against the table.
“Gerald, you’re not normally that big an idiot, which is why I’m going to give you a chance to explain before I set you on fire.” Avraniel’s smile was incredibly toothy. “Now, explain.”
“She’s the councillor!” Gerald waved one hand at the glowing woman. “Councillor Winters!”
The elf frowned, and beads of sweat broke out across Gerald’s brow. “The last time I checked, they didn’t allow spirits or ghosts to join the Council.” She jabbed one finger at the glowing woman, who merely smiled and waved back politely. “Does that look like a normal person to you? Have you forgotten that I’m an elf? I can tell the difference between a person and a spirit, you idiot. That, right there, is clearly a spirit of some kind. Now, move, so I can blast her.”
Vicky – the glowing woman – chuckled softly. “Actually, Gerald is right. I am Councillor Victoria Charlotte Winters. What you’re looking at right now is part of my magic. I won’t get into the specifics, but I am quite like a spirit in this form. I would also appreciate it very much if you let Gerald go.” Her smile never wavered, but there was a hint of steel in her voice.
“Oh, yeah?” Avraniel gave Vicky a grin that bordered on madness. “Make me.”
“I’d heard you were quite rebellious.” The glow around Vicky intensified. “So, I’m going to ask you again. Let him go.”
Katie had not been involved in many of what her master jokingly referred to as ‘magical pissing contests’ since he’d always been clear about what he thought of two mages standing opposite each other while summoning as much power as possible in a bid to intimidate each other. He thought it was complete idiocy. Why stand around like that when he could be kicking his opponent in the back or hitting them with his shovel? Katie agreed. If she had to fight someone powerful, the last thing she wanted to do was fight out in the open. But Vicky was obviously used to throwing her magical weight around. And she had a lot of magic to throw around.
The amount of magic rolling off Vicky was terrifying. It rattled the dishes, and even Avraniel seemed to feel the strain, her brows furrowing as her own power flooded the room. It was difficult to say which of the two women had more magic – their powers were too different – but the elf did let go of Gerald.
“Not half bad, sparky.” Avraniel threw her head back and laughed. “I’d say you have balls, but clearly, you don’t. I can see why they put you on the Council.” She gave Gerald a gentle pat on the head, and the bureaucrat clutched at his grey robes in terror. “Oh, relax. I wasn’t actually going to kill you. I do want that pardon. At worst, I might have singed some of your hair.”
“Um… thanks?” Gerald scuttled back to his seat.
“Let’s move on.” Councillor Winters settled back into her chair. It didn’t escape Katie’s notice that the woman simply passed through the table along the way. How did that work? The councillor must have some control over how tangible she was. Otherwise, she should have passed through the chair as well. “Gerald, while I appreciate you coming to my defence, you needn’t worry. I’m not actually present in a way that would allow anyone in this room to truly harm me except Timmy, and he would still have to take certain steps.” She gestured at herself. “This is closer to an astral projection.”
“I have a shovel for that, you know.” Timmy rubbed his chin. “But you’ve gotten a lot better since the last time we saw each other. Much, much better.”
The rat beside Katie gave a quiet squeak, and she ran one hand along its back. How did her master know the councillor? There was so much about his life that she didn’t know, and knowledge was power. Her mas
ter and the councillor acted like they were friends.
“How did you end up on the Council?” Timmy made a face. “I was under the impression that Supreme Cleric Phillips held your order’s seat on the Council. He never liked me much. It probably didn’t help that I burned his house down although, in my defence, he did try to have me lynched.”
“You never paid attention in any of his classes either.” Councillor Winters’s lips curved up into a smile. “It drove him crazy. You also set him on fire in what you claimed was an accident during one of our practical examinations. Then you had the audacity to somehow pass the examination.”
Avraniel sniggered. “You set that uptight bastard on fire? I’m starting to like you, idiot.”
“That was your fault, Vicky.” Timmy pointed his fork at her. “Your magic does horrible things to runes and seals. It’s going to take me ages to fix everything you set off on your way in. Besides, I wasn’t trying to set him on fire. I was aiming for James. The Supreme Cleric just happened to be in the way.”
“You don’t have to worry. I’ve gotten better with my magic. Your spells should all be fine once I leave.” Vicky’s expression grew serious. “What I am about to tell you is not to leave this room. I will know if someone talks, and I will not be pleased.” Her eyes blazed, shining like the sun. Katie picked up her napkin and tied it around her head in a bid to reduce the brightness to a more manageable level. “Supreme Cleric Phillips is no longer the supreme cleric or a member of the Council because he gave himself a heart attack during one of his sermons. He was ranting about the evils of necromancy – using you and your master as his examples – when he collapsed. The healers were able to get to him in time, but he was advised to step down from his positions of authority for his own good. I was elected to replace him.”
Timmy snickered and then began to laugh so hard that he ended up pounding the table with one hand before falling out of his chair. He managed to get back onto his chair, but he was still laughing. Katie found herself laughing too. It was pretty funny. Her master had managed to get a member of the Council, a leader of a major religious organisation that wanted his head on a pike, so angry that he’d given himself a heart attack. It was so accidentally awesome – just like her master.
Vicky cleared her throat as Timmy made a vain attempt to calm himself with a glass of water, only to spill most of it as he continued to laugh. “In any case, your success in killing Black Scales and recruiting the elf over there didn’t help his mood. I think the prospect of you receiving a pardon was what set him off in the first place. I do believe he was looking forward to having you tortured and executed at some point.”
“Well, that’s one less old bastard to worry about.” Avraniel snorted. “I mean he’s not dead, but he’s not even worth killing now.” Vicky gave her a pointed look, and the elf cleared her throat and then spoke in a ridiculously saccharine voice. “Not that I would ever harm a beloved member of the most esteemed Council.” She glanced away and muttered under her breath. “Not until I get my pardon, anyway.”
“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.” Vicky had dimmed her glow somewhat. It was now at roughly the same level as a campfire, nice and comfortable. “It took me a lot of wheeling and dealing to secure my new position. For a religious order, getting promoted requires an astonishing amount of treachery and subterfuge.” Her lips curled. “It was rather fun, actually.”
“You always did have a knack for politics.” Timmy’s eyes gleamed. “How is James taking it? Please tell me he had a heart attack too?”
Katie was also curious to know how her master’s archenemy was faring, but this had gone on long enough. They needed to get down to business. “Master,” she said, using her most respectful tone because she understood the importance of appearing united in front of a member of the Council. “How do you know the councillor? I thought that her order hated necromancers. They’ve certainly wiped out a few of our rivals over the years.” By which she meant that the Order of the Blessed Dawn had imprisoned or executed no less than four competing necromancers.
“Technically, my order does not have an official, canonical stance on necromancy.” Vicky pursed her lips. “There have been four major councils convened on the matter since the foundation of my order, and all four have failed to reach a definitive decision on how to deal with necromancers. Part of the problem is that the clerics of my order use magic that is, in some respects, highly similar to necromancy. At least two of the order’s founding clerics were also necromancers, which presents the order with something of a conundrum.”
Katie nodded, noting how well rehearsed the councillor’s words were. She must have had this discussion before, possibly even with Katie’s master.
“Under my predecessor’s reign, the order saw fit to take a more… aggressive stance on necromancy.” Vicky drew one finger across her throat. “And by aggressive, I mean to say that we imprisoned or executed any necromancer we could get our hands on. However, I prefer a more laidback approach. You and your master, Katie, are working for us now. And if the Lord of the Blessed Dawn wanted you dead, he’d have rained holy, cleansing fire from the sky and wiped this castle off the face of the earth. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s done something like that, and my predecessor has asked him to do that on several occasions. The fact that you’re still here means something.” She smiled. “When I first met your master, Katie, I didn’t know he was a necromancer. He was just an earth mage with wonky magic – a little odd, perhaps, but nice enough.” She chuckled and shot Timmy a teasing look. “You’d managed to bury yourself under a pile of rubble after your magic malfunctioned. I had to help dig you out.”
“Thank you so much for sharing that story with my apprentice,” Timmy drawled. Katie grinned. She would definitely be bringing that up the next time he tried to throw her out a window. “I attended the academy she was at in disguise. That’s where I met her predecessor and James.”
“Yes.” The councillor smirked and winked at Katie. “I remember having to help you with your homework. Honestly, for a necromancer, your knowledge of the various spirit worlds and their denizens was sorely lacking. It’s a miracle you weren’t eaten by the first spirit you summoned.”
“In my line of work, Vicky, people are either concerned with making the most horrifying zombie possible or summoning some kind of world-crushing, reality-rending being of ultimate horror to slaughter our enemies.” Timmy tapped his shovel with one hand. “If I got eaten by the first spirit I summoned, I wouldn’t be much of a necromancer.” He frowned. “So could you please stop sharing embarrassing stories about me? It’s really not helping.”
“I don’t know.” Avraniel took a sip of wine. “I could listen to a few more.”
“I suppose I should stop. I am in your castle. It would be rude to continue.” The councillor lifted a grape to her lips and then put it down. Katie wondered if she could actually eat it, or if would simply pass through her. “I will say, however, that the two of us became friends and that we remained friends even after I found out you were a necromancer.”
“What she means to say is that I was the only one who disliked James as much as she did,” Timmy said.
Vicky’s eyes narrowed ominously, and her glow brightened again. Katie winced. The next time the councillor visited, Katie needed to have some goggles handy. “He is a pretentious snob who had the gall to ask my father for my hand in marriage without saying so much as a word to me. He then proceeded to announce to our entire class that we were betrothed before my father had a chance to reply. I did not take that well.” She paused and then was all smiles once more. “Anyway, I was the one who argued that the Council should accept your application for a pardon. I had to call in a lot of favours since I wasn’t on the Council then, but it worked out. In fact, Gerald used to work for me. Now that I’m a councillor, he answers directly to me, for the most part.”
“It is an honour to serve you once again, councillor.” Gerald smiled and then gave the councillor a look that
was equal parts pleading and exasperated. “Have you been keeping your desk tidy like I showed you?”
Vicky waved one hand and then favoured Gerald with a beatific smile. “That is what I have assistants for.” She turned her attention to Katie. “Your master has told me a lot about you in his letters. He always did want an apprentice who wasn’t completely demented. Apparently, a bit of dementedness is quite common amongst necromancers.” She tilted her head to one side. “The pink-framed glasses are a bit odd although that rat of yours is very cute.” The rat in question brandished his bow. Vicky smirked. “You know, I still haven’t introduced myself properly yet.”
Timmy rolled his eyes and threw a grape at her. It passed right through the councillor. “Oh, please. You just like showing off.”
Vicky picked up the grape and threw it back. How that worked, Katie had no idea. “As if you don’t. You might be all practical now, but I remember when you told me you were really a necromancer. You had a whole song and dance routine lined up.”
“There was no dancing.” Timmy scowled, and Katie resolved to find out more. This was ideal blackmail material. “And it was only a short song. I was young. Give me a break.”
“You played a banjo,” Vicky replied. “And it’s not like you’re old now. Besides, as much as you preach practicality, I know you enjoyed theatricality. Why else would you put together those things you make? Can you honestly tell me that a zombie hydra-dragon-bear is practical?”
“It’s extremely practical when it comes to killing things.” Timmy scowled. “Sure, the last one didn’t turn out exactly how I planned, but I’m fairly sure the next one won’t try to kill me. Now, just hurry up and introduce yourself.”
Vicky got to her feet, and blinding light filled the room. Her voice seemed to come from every direction at once, and the intricate robes she wore fluttered in some breeze of her own making, which really didn’t make much sense since the robes – along with the rest of her – appeared to be made out of pure light. “I am Councillor Victoria Charlotte Winters, Supreme Cleric of the Order of the Blessed Dawn, High Priestess of the Seventh Province, Heir to the House of Winters, Exalted Leader of –”
Unconventional Heroes 2 - Two Necromancers, an Army of Golems, and a Demon Lord Page 3