“What you haven’t explained is your reaction to seeing Sam now.”
Her gentle tone reminded me how well she understood me, her words instantly sobering. Yet it was hard to piece my feelings into words.
“In all honesty, I’m still trying to come to terms with it,” I said. “There was something about the day Sam disappeared that felt uncanny. Joe suspected he was dead, whereas I held onto the hope he was alive... Yet I don’t think either of us really expected to see him again.”
“And what next?” Hannah coaxed. “Are you going to stay in touch?”
“Definitely,” I said as more recent memories flooded back. “I had a long chat with my foster parents the other night and they’re delighted. In fact, they can’t remember if I even mentioned Sam before this.”
“I think you suppressed all memories of him,” Hannah concluded, “especially given your emotional outburst just then... but I’m pleased you’ve resolved this. It must be good to have your childhood friend back.”
How did I really feel, though?
Confused, yes, except Sam was no longer that small frightened boy who wouldn’t say ‘boo’ to a goose. Sam had bloomed into an undeniably striking man, and if I were to be honest with myself, I had to admit I was dazzled by him.
Chapter Forty-Nine
That feeling stayed with me for the rest of the week and it was good to have something positive to focus on. As far as I knew, the wheels of the investigation rolled on in the background. Yet as the police pursued what meagre leads they had, nothing new had transpired.
It drew my thoughts back to Sarah. If only we could report the threats she had been sent, but in our need to protect Connor, it was impossible. My hands on the wheel tightened as I stared ahead at the traffic queue.
I simply could not bear it if anything happened to him.
Connor was an aloof child who seemed unreachable at times, but exploring the beach together had ignited a hidden glow in him. He had been searching the rocks before the sea mist rolled in, palm outstretched to reveal a gnarled grey pebble, unsure what the overlapping spirals were.
‘They’re fossils, Connor. Rotulara Bognorienis.’
I would never forget his smile, and like the sun peeping around the edge of a rain cloud, it shone from deep within his eyes.
No-one could tell what the future held, but with my mind wandering off on a tangent, I found myself thinking about Sam again.
He was due to visit this Sunday.
Excited, but at the same time jittery with nerves, I could not wait to see him. His idea to book a pub for Sunday lunch delighted me on so many levels, and already I could imagine the four of us in some idyllic country setting.
By the time I let myself into my flat on Friday though, I had no idea what lay in store, and was surprised to discover a text on my mobile.
Hi Maisie, how are you? Looking forward to Sunday but what are you up to tomorrow? Got some time off work and would love a chance to get to know you again. Best wishes, Sam x
It wasn’t until next day that reality hit. Still astonished that Sam – Sam, who I’d thought I’d never see again – was due to turn up at my flat soon, I checked my reflection for the fourth time. My newly washed hair gleamed and I wore the tiniest amount of makeup. I had dithered over what to wear, but my burgundy cords were fairly new and teamed up with a cool summer top and black puffa jacket, I looked stylish, whilst not overdressed.
Minutes later, a car pulled up outside, and glancing out of the window, I felt my heart skip a beat.
Could this sporty Audi in kingfisher blue be Sam’s car?
Peering around the door frame, I saw him slide out of the driver’s side.
“Sam,” I gasped with pleasure. “You found my address okay, then?”
Immaculate in mushroom chinos and a brown suede jacket that matched his eyes as well as his walking boots, he sauntered up to the door. At first we just gazed at each other, until at last he broke the spell.
“Hello Maisie. It’s good to see you again.”
“You too,” I murmured. “What have you got in mind for this afternoon?”
“I was thinking...” he faltered, “seeing as we’re in West Sussex, I did some research on the area. How d’you feel about joining me for a spin? We could check out some of the local beauty spots.”
A tingle of delight ran over me. “Sounds great!”
“Hop in then! We might as well get going.”
Slinging my bag over my shoulder, I locked the front door and followed him to his car. Like a true gentleman, he pulled the passenger door open for me. But as I began to unwind in the soft leather seat, it seemed no time at all before we had left Bognor behind and were charging up the A29 towards Fontwell.
“How’s Joe?” he asked lightly.
“Fine. He’s with Jess as usual.”
Observing his neat profile, only then did I wonder whether I should have mentioned Sam’s visit to Joe, but it was too late now. One cosy weekend spent in Jess’s apartment had turned into something of a habit, but this naturally led to Sam’s next question.
“Do I take it they’re living together?”
I bit my lip, careful to mask my emotions. “Not quite. Monday to Friday, he lodges with me but I don’t think he will be for much longer. She’s asked him to move in with her.”
Yes, Joe’s disclosure had left me slightly downcast.
But like all new lovers, they could barely keep their hands off each other, so I had to accept the inevitable. Why would a young, red-blooded male like Joe want to be holed up with me, watching the same boring TV shows, when he could be indulging in round-the-clock sex with my beautiful best friend?
“Have you figured out where we’re going?” I asked, eager to change the subject.
Sam’s face betrayed a hint of merriment. “I looked on Google and put a route into my Sat Nav, but I’ll let you in on a little secret. I had some help.”
“Go on.”
“One of my old pals lives in a village called Storrington.”
“I know Storrington. It’s over Worthing way.”
“Yes,” Sam mused. “I’m going to see him a bit later but I thought we could take a look around the Chichester area.”
“Suits me fine,” I consented, letting go of my breath at last. “Chichester is where I work, so I know the area well.”
It seemed only natural to tell him about my job; the West Sussex County Council headquarters and the busy role I served in their fostering department.
Seemingly fascinated, his questions came thick and fast.
Before I had a chance to draw breath, he was quizzing me about my teenage years, my education. The reason I had chosen this career path.
How courteous to show such an interest, while on the fringe of my mind hung those final reminiscences from my therapy. Sam had doted on me once...
All the while we were talking, I wasn’t paying attention to where we were going. Having left the main carriageway some time ago, it struck me how narrow the roads had become with every new twist and turn. But deeper into the folds of the South Downs we ventured, his Sat Nav guiding the way.
“Anyway, enough about me,” I said. “What about you? You live and work in London but what about relationships? Are you married or seeing anyone?”
Staring at the road blankly, he gave a wry chuckle. “Just split up with someone, actually. We met on Tinder, the dating app.”
“So how does that work?” I asked, thinking it must be easy for him to meet people in a social hub like London.
“You use it to find people with common interests. Compare photos, music and swipe the profiles you like. I thought I’d found a match when she started raving about my playlist on Spotify, but it wasn’t to be... We drove each other nuts.”
Grappling to take it in, I was staring ahead as he tackled the upcoming bend. Next I spotted the chalk-white walls of a traditional pub looming on the corner, a mass of foliage hugging the windows, complimented by a profusion of hanging baskets.<
br />
“Hey, that looks like a nice pub!” he blurted.
“The George,” I mumbled under my breath. “We’re in Eartham.”
“We could go there tomorrow,” he enthused. “What do you think?”
The joy in his tone was unmissable and I found myself nodding, thinking we might stop and book a table.
“Sure, why not. Good choice...”
Yet Sam drove straight past and following the country road beyond the pub, we were swallowed into the shade. I blinked rapidly as the woods on both sides of the road thickened, a vortex of trees encircling us. My heart was picking up pace and in the next moment, I nearly stopped breathing. For without warning, he had spun his car into the parking area at the front of Eartham Woods.
“Why are we stopping here?”
“Eartham Woods is part of the South Downs,” Sam chirped. “There might still be a few bluebells, according to my mate, James. Shall we take a stroll?”
I gaped at him in confusion before disentangling my legs from under my car seat. Heedless of my rising panic, he jumped out of the driver side, wandering right up to the forest border.
“Well, come on then!” He glanced back with a smile.
With no choice but to follow, I gulped back my fear.
It’s just a forest, I told myself. Nothing in there could harm us, and given the number of cars scattered around the car park, it was not as if we were alone.
Slowly but tentatively, I crept up to his side. Thick foliage concealed the footpath. Speckles of sunlight shone through the leaves, dappling the ground, the hum of cars gradually fading, until all I could hear were birds chirping in the overhead branches.
Another step took us onto the path, and that was where I froze - a musty smell of damp wood and leaves pierced my nostrils, evoking an inexplicable terror...
And I was powerless to fight it.
“I-I can’t go in there, Sam… sorry but, b-but…”
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he gasped. “You’ve turned as white as a sheet!”
I fought back a sob. “I don’t like woods, I’ve got a phobia.”
His face fell, the sparkle in his eyes extinguished.
Okay, so he deserved a little more explanation.
But even as I spoke, my voice shook.
“Woods a-are the place of my nightmares. Even as a kid, the thought of playing in them triggered panic attacks. I guess it goes back to what we were talking about... You’ve got memories. But mine are buried deep.”
“Oh, Maisie, I am so sorry,” Sam murmured. “I didn’t think.”
His voice reverberated with softness, calming the tremors in me. Turning to me slowly, he drew me into his arms. My heart crashed inside my ribcage as I clung to him, but I had to keep talking.
“It’s connected to that party. Fragments emerged in my nightmares and then the therapy like - like - a flutter of red ribbon. I never knew they were used to bind our hands but that was before the whisperings and those creepy hooded men...”
“Ssh,” he kept muttering. “Try not to dwell.”
Pulling apart, I stared wistfully back at him, and as our eyes met, I felt an immediate spark of attraction. Before I had a chance to gather my thoughts, he had dropped a kiss onto my lips; an action so swift, so spontaneous, it left me wondering if I had dreamt it.
“Would you like to go somewhere else?”
“West Dean Gardens isn’t far,” I said breathlessly, “if you fancy a wander, and I’ll even treat you to a cream tea in the restaurant afterwards.”
My heart could have burst. When Sam said he would love a chance to get to know me better I had never expected him to kiss me. Soaring up Goodwood Hill, we drove past the racecourse, absorbing the views. A wide green valley rolled into the distance, cloaked in swathes of pine forest.
I felt a rush of euphoria. Just a little further lay the hidden gem of West Dean Gardens.
“There it is,” I gasped, pointing, “I don’t know if your friend mentioned this place but you are in for a treat.”
I adored West Dean Gardens, an impressive estate, which managed to look stunning in all seasons, and no sooner had we paid the entrance fee than I began to lead the way through.
A bridge arched over the brook into an area of open parkland, the trees widely scattered. Wandering a little further, I studied his face. There was something about his extraordinary male beauty that stirred me, filling me with an urge to probe into the one part of his story I was still curious about.
“So how did your life really pan out? Growing up in Scotland, I mean, with your father’s family?”
I saw his eyes harden. “When I moved into Galbraith Castle, it didn’t go down well with the rest of the clan, especially his wife, Mary. Her family owned a whisky distillery. High society snobs with a status to uphold, so in no way did they want to be discredited.”
“But why would they be discredited?” I frowned. “You were his son.”
“His illegitimate son. My mum was some high class hooker he had a fling with, remember?” A mirthless laugh tore out of him. “Yet here I was, their bastard son, living under the same roof.”
“That hardly seems fair,” I protested. “I thought he chose to take you in...”
“He did.”
“Then what sort of life did you lead, and weren’t you a bit lonely?”
“It was hell,” he said flatly.
Mood blackening, he went on to describe the attic room he was moved into. Kept out of sight, he spent the next chapter of his childhood in near isolation, where few people even knew of his existence.
As I listened to his account, it froze the breath in my lungs. Home schooled alongside his half-brother, he was permitted no friends, nor had any contact with the outside world, the remainder of his childhood confined to the castle walls.
“Duncan had to watch over me. I looked up to him in a way, though he didn’t much like me, and who could blame him? Poor bugger! Father was pretty harsh on him, looking back. He didn’t exactly choose to be my minder.”
“Oh, Sam, that doesn’t sound like much fun,” I whispered.
Head bowed, he flicked his fingers through his fringe. Glimpsing his scar again, I yearned to grab his hand, but resisted. It made more sense to keep walking.
“I’m okay about it, really... but can I tell you about this another day? It’s not my favourite subject, and there’s too much to cover in one session.”
The air ran silent, leaving me helpless to wonder if there was anything I could say to comfort him. It took me back to Orchard Grange again, the heartbreaking stories we shared. Yet as we strolled across the lawn, I could not wait to show him the pergola; a spectacular three-hundred-foot Edwardian walkway paved in flagstone.
An air of mystery immersed us as we followed the path to the end; the climbing plants twisting around the pillars, a riot of wild roses fragrant against the feathery purple plumes of wisteria.
“Awesome,” Sam said, a smile creeping its way onto his face at last. “The structure is incredible and it looks so old. What else is here?”
“I’ll show you around the walled gardens if you like.”
Following the path from the pergola, we passed through an iron gate. Artistically laid out in classic Victorian design, the high brick walls contained a variety of plants; orderly rows of vegetables and fruit bushes.
“Wow,” Sam said, “some place this is. There was a huge great garden at Galbraith Castle, but formal. There is so much more they could have done with it...”
Breaking off mid sentence, he turned to me with a grin.
“Do you ever fantasise about living anywhere else?”
“Who doesn’t?” I chuckled. “I mean, Bognor’s very friendly but it’s a town, and I miss having a garden.”
Catching his eye, I saw a twinkle of hope. A look that left me fantasising over whether today’s encounter could be the start of something more meaningful.
Completing our circuit, we spent the final half hour in the restaurant where, true to
my word, I ordered the cream tea for two.
The weather had been kind up until now but as we walked back to Sam’s car, the sun slid behind a cloud, darkening the sky. I shivered as an icy breeze cut right through me. Time seemed to stand still and even the birds had stopped singing.
“Looks like rain,” he commented. “Best we get on our way...”
On the homeward journey we spoke very little, which surprised me, but we seemed lost in our own private reveries.
Sam pulled up as close to my flat as possible and regardless of the veil of drizzle, he insisted on walking me to the door.
“Sorry to have to leave you,” he said, “but I promised I’d call in on James.”
“That’s fine,” I said with a smile. “It’s been a great day and I’m looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. So shall I book a table at the George?”
“Sure,” Sam nodded. He stroked my cheek with his index finger, his eyes warm. “It’s been good to spend some quality time with you, Maisie, but is there any chance we can keep this to ourselves?”
I nodded without a second thought, wondering what Joe would make of our secret liaison. He was yet to grasp the truth of Sam’s past, but it was a secret that would keep until tomorrow.
Chapter Fifty
Opening his eyes to a blaze of sunshine, Joe faced the day in high spirits. With Jess sashaying out of her en-suite in nothing but a skimpy towel, he felt his heart swell with love. Somehow he never imagined their relationship would advance beyond a fling, but the passion between them had soared - more so since spending weekends together - and he was stunned she had invited him to move in.
How could he possibly resist?
His only reservation was Maisie. He had never wanted to neglect her, despite her pledge ‘she was cool about it.’ In fact, when they’d met her last night to share a takeaway, she had been in a surprisingly good mood. The glow in her eyes had uplifted him, and today he wanted to hold on to that optimism.
Come midday though, his thoughts were elsewhere. Maisie collected them from Jess’s apartment, as excited about seeing Sam as they were, and she seemed particularly keen to venture out into the countryside.
Lethal Ties Page 27