“As a matter of fact, I do.” She smiled up at him. “My late husband taught me to play early on in our marriage. We often enjoyed a game in the evening by the fire.”
“I hope you’ll indulge me with a match during my stay. Even though I’ve tried to teach Nolan, he isn’t partial to the game. It’s been forever since I’ve faced a good opponent.”
Inside the parlor door, Hannah’s state of anxiety heightened. Perhaps it was the way her mother and Molly had become inseparable since her arrival, or perhaps it was seeing the stirrings of a romance between the earl and her aunt. Whatever the reason, Hannah found she could not abide an evening as a fifth wheel—ignored and invisible once again—all too aware of the gaping hole of Nolan’s absence.
She begged everyone’s pardon, claiming fatigue, and bid them good evening. No one dared challenge her, given her delicate condition. Instead of heading upstairs, however, she slipped down the corridor to the garden doors that led onto the terrace, making sure to keep away from the parlor windows. She craved the cool evening air to whisk away her tortured thoughts and the blackness of the evening to shroud her grieving soul.
Hannah leaned against a stone pillar looking out over her aunt’s darkened gardens, shivering in the damp evening air. She should have taken time to retrieve her wrap before coming out, but she’d forgotten it in her room, and the thought of climbing all those stairs seemed daunting. With her added weight, she tried not to use the stairs more than once a day.
She rubbed a trembling hand over her belly where the child kicked under her ribs. Where is your father, little one? Nolan should be here, sharing her wonder and joy at this life growing within her. Did he care so little for his unborn child that he’d abandon them both?
Hot tears welled in her eyes and, with the dark solitude of the night surrounding her, she allowed them to spill freely down her cheeks. She was tired of being strong and sensible. Tired of waiting for her husband. If it hadn’t been for her condition, she would have sought him out long before this. But traveling at this stage of pregnancy would be inviting disaster. Time was slipping through the hourglass, and soon their babe would be born. Would Nolan leave his child without a father, when he knew the harm it could cause?
A hot flash of pain seared her side. She clutched her belly and held her breath. A few seconds later, the spasm subsided, and Hannah released a long gust of air. Yet, a thread of fear wound its way around her heart.
Please, Lord, don’t let the baby come now. It’s too early. I couldn’t bear to lose Nolan and my baby too.
Another pain shafted through her abdomen. She let out a cry and doubled over, clutching the pillar to keep upright.
“Hannah, what is it?” Quick footsteps sounded on the terrace, and her mother’s warm hands grasped her shoulders.
“I . . . I’m having pains, but it’s too early.”
“Come inside. We need to get you off your feet.” Her mother wrapped a strong arm around Hannah’s waist and steered her back inside to her aunt’s drawing room. She laid her gently on the sofa, placed a pillow beneath her head, and unfolded one of her aunt’s knitted throws over her.
“What were you thinking, staying outside without a wrap? You’re chilled through.”
Her mother’s disapproving frown made Hannah want to weep anew.
“I’m going to get Iris and ask the maid to make you some chamomile tea. I’ll be back in a moment.”
Hannah closed her eyes and shivered, waiting for her mother to return.
At last, she arrived with a hot brick wrapped in flannel, which she place at Hannah’s cold feet. “The maid is bringing the tea. It will warm you and soothe your nerves. You must let go of all this worry, Hannah. It will harm the child.”
Her mother pulled a chair closer to the sofa and took Hannah’s chilled hands, rubbing them to bring the blood back. Minutes later, the maid arrived with the tea. Hannah allowed her mother to help her sit up and sipped from the delicate cup. The hot liquid flowed through her cold, stiff body, infusing a trail of warmth.
If only her heart could thaw as quickly.
“How are the pains now?”
“They have subsided.”
“That’s a relief. Though I must say it saddens me to see you so unhappy, daughter.” Her mother’s features pinched.
Hannah frowned, about to refute her mother’s claim.
“No need to deny it. I could tell the moment I arrived you’re not yourself. What can we do to rectify this situation with Nolan?”
Hannah shook her head. “There’s nothing you can do. I thought Nolan would come, but it’s clear he will not. I will have the baby alone and find some type of employment to support us. Aunt Iris has kindly offered to let us stay with her.”
Her mother’s thin lips flattened. “I never imagined you’d end up raising a child on your own. And to think, all I ever wanted was for you to have a better life than I could give you.”
Hannah stared at her mother in disbelief. “Is that why you left me alone at Stainsby, tore me away from the only family I had left? To give me a good life?”
At one time, Hannah would have been shocked by the bitterness and hostility of her voice, but today, with her feelings so close to the surface, nothing surprised her. She wanted to lash out, to make someone else share her pain.
God suffers with you, my child. He counts every one of your tears. The minister’s words from her father’s funeral sprang to mind. Once again, the words failed to console her.
“What are you insinuating?” Her mother’s face was pale.
“That you chose Molly over me. That you chose your husband’s wishes over your own child. How could you leave me with strangers?”
Her mother’s eyes grew wide. Silence hung in the room.
Then a new searing pain ripped across Hannah’s midsection, eliciting a scream that echoed out into the hall.
Iris rushed into the room. “Hannah dear, shall I send for the doctor?”
“No, no. I’ll be fine.” Her breath came out in pants.
The earl appeared beside her aunt. “Call for the doctor, Iris. I will not have the life of my grandchild jeopardized.” He turned stony eyes to Hannah’s mother. “If you are causing your daughter distress, madam, I suggest you leave immediately.”
Mum nodded meekly. “We’ll talk again when you’re feeling better, Hannah. I’ll be in the parlor if you need me.”
Dr. Greenley, her aunt’s physician, arrived within the hour. He examined Hannah, felt her abdomen, and told her she was having early contractions. “In most cases, these are harmless. Merely the body’s way of preparing for the labor to come. In some instances, however, they continue to progress, and the babe is born prematurely. I hope this will not be the case.”
Hannah twisted the edges of the throw between her fingers. “What must I do, Doctor?”
“For starters, you must stay off your feet. For several days at least. Secondly, you must avoid becoming upset. Try to remain calm so as not to trigger any further contractions.”
Hannah nodded. “I will do whatever I must.”
The doctor patted her arm and snapped his bag closed. “I will leave you a tonic that is known to help stave off labor pains. Take two doses daily.” He straightened. “Now, someone will need to assist this young lady to her bed. If anything further develops, do not hesitate to send your boy for me, Your Grace. I will be back to check on Mrs. Price in two days’ time, barring further developments.”
“Thank you, Dr. Greenley. We are most grateful for your assistance.” Iris ushered him to the door.
Hannah closed her eyes and breathed a prayer of thanks to God for stopping the contractions. She vowed, with His help, to keep her emotions firmly in check for the duration of her pregnancy.
When she opened her eyes, Iris had returned with the earl in tow. “Edward, would you please carry Hannah to her room? I’ll show you the way.”
Heat infused Hannah’s cheeks as the earl reached down and lifted her as though she weighed no
more than a feather. She held herself stiffly within his arms, wishing it were Nolan carrying her upstairs instead.
“Relax, Hannah.” The earl’s low voice rumbled through his chest. “Contrary to popular belief, I do not bite.” He glanced down at her then, his features softening. “If it’s Nolan that’s causing your distress, you needn’t worry. One thing I’m certain of is that he loves you and will be here as soon as he’s able. ”
“Truly?”
“You have my word.”
A measure of despair lifted from Hannah’s spirit, easing the tension in her muscles. She breathed a quiet sigh of relief. Who would have thought the earl would be the one to provide her comfort?
After a full day of rest and no recurrence of the contractions, Hannah was allowed out of bed. Iris asked Edward to bring Hannah down to the drawing room to lie on the settee. Molly and Daisy kept her company, while Molly sewed the final ribbons onto some of the baby clothes Hannah had made.
In the afternoon, Aunt Iris accompanied Hannah’s mother into the drawing room.
“How are you feeling today, Hannah dear?” she asked.
“Much better, thank you.” Hannah tried to muster a smile. For although she had mended physically, her heart and her spirit had not.
“If you feel up to it, and if it is not too distressing, your mother would like a word with you.”
Hannah released a small sigh. Her outburst the other night had been made in the heat of emotional turmoil, and now in the calm light of day, she regretted her accusations. “I would like that. Thank you.”
Her mother crossed the room, and like a bird looking for a perch, seated herself on a high-back chair near Hannah. Iris took a seat at her desk on the opposite side of the room.
“Mum, I need to apologize for the other evening. I wasn’t in my right mind and spoke harshly. I hope you can forgive me.”
“It is I who owe you an apology, Hannah, for my distance all these years. I’m afraid my motives for bringing you to Stainsby were never made clear to you.”
“Your motives?”
She nodded. “When I agreed to marry Robert, he told me he could not afford to take on my children as well as his own. I saw the type of conditions his children lived in, and I did not want that for you—or Molly, for that matter. By leaving you at Stainsby Hall with Edna, I truly believed you’d have a chance at a better life.” Her mother’s eyes grew damp.
Hannah fought to control her emotions, hardly daring to believe her mother’s words. “So it wasn’t because you preferred Molly over me?”
Mum reached forward to clutch Hannah’s hand in her own work-worn ones. “No, Hannah. I love both my daughters equally. Molly’s age and her fragile health were the only things that colored my decision. It almost killed me to leave you. You may not believe that until you’re a mother yourself. Maybe then you’ll understand the lengths a parent would go to for her child’s well-being.”
Hannah caressed her abdomen. Would she be able to make the same type of sacrifice her mother had made? She hung her head. “I’m so sorry for thinking the worst of you.”
“It’s not your fault. I should have explained my actions better. It’s just that I could seldom get away from the farm.” She paused and let out a long breath. “That’s not entirely true. The truth is, it was harder to see you and have to leave you again. Keeping my distance was a way to avoid the pain.” Tears formed in her eyes. “Can you forgive me for not being the mother you deserved?”
Hannah’s heart expanded in her chest, as though a stopper had uncorked, and a flood of affection poured forth. Her mother had loved her after all—had only meant to save her from suffering. She never knew she had unwittingly caused Hannah such grief, or that Hannah had thought herself unloved and abandoned.
“Of course I forgive you, Mum.” Hannah opened her arms to receive her mother’s embrace, their tears mingling on her cheek.
“I love you, Hannah.”
“I love you too,” she whispered.
In the comfort of her mother’s arms, Hannah’s heart began to heal at last, and the seed of a thought began to sprout. Perhaps she was worthy of love after all.
Chapter
30
Nolan straightened his cravat as he stepped from the carriage in front of Hartford Hall. His stomach tightened, and his palms grew damp despite the cool temperature. How would Hannah receive him? With love or contempt? With forgiveness or fury?
He would have been here days sooner, if not for the schedule of the man who shared his carriage.
“Wait here until I send for you,” he said to his traveling companion. “I hope it won’t take too long.”
“No rush. This is a most comfortable carriage.” The man settled back against the cushioned seat and closed his eyes.
Another coach would arrive shortly with Victoria and Aunt Ophelia. Nolan hoped that Evelyn and Orville would be able to make the trip as well. It was time they all came together as a family. Yet the fact that the pair had gone out of their way to avoid him did not bode well.
Nolan frowned. Another piece of news added to his edginess. He’d had a note from the constabulary in Derby, stating that in light of Nolan’s previous inquiry about Timothy Bellows and the possible threat made against Nolan’s family, they wished to inform him that Bellows had recently escaped from jail. Though the authorities doubted he’d have the gall to come anywhere near Stainsby Hall, they advised the earl and his family to take whatever precautions they deemed necessary. Nolan set his jaw, vowing to do so as soon as he returned home. For the present, he was relieved that Hannah and Molly were nowhere near Stainsby.
Nolan shook off his thoughts and started up the stairs to the front door. How differently he approached the great ivy-covered mansion on this occasion. His first time here, he had stormed in full of anger and pride, demanding to see his wife. Now he arrived in humility, coming to beg his wife’s forgiveness, his pride in tatters around his feet.
Once again, Mr. Carstairs answered Nolan’s knock.
Nolan gave a bow. “Good day. May I speak with the Duchess of Hartford—in private, if possible?”
“Please come in.” The man’s pinched features belied his polite words.
“Thank you.” Nolan followed the butler inside.
“If you’ll wait here, I’ll see if Her Grace is available.” The older man shuffled off down one of the corridors.
Nolan paced the vestibule, praying for the Lord’s guidance. He needed to ensure that he acted with complete respect and sensitivity for Hannah’s feelings, as a true husband should.
A few moments later, the duchess herself came out to greet him. “Nolan, thank heaven you’ve come at last.” She leaned forward to kiss his cheek, moisture skimming her gray eyes.
“It’s good to see you again, Lady Hartford. Is everything all right?”
“Please, you must call me Iris.” She smiled. “Come and we’ll speak in my husband’s old study. We’ll have more privacy there.” She led him down a corridor toward the back of the house. At the end of the hall, she opened a door and entered a dark, musty room.
He waited while she threw open the heavy draperies to let in the sunlight and motioned him to take a seat in front of a carved desk.
“I’m sorry this room is a little stale. I haven’t come in here much since Edgar died.” She took a seat beside him. “I wanted to speak to you about Hannah before she knows you’re here.”
“Why? Is something wrong?” Tension banded like steel across his shoulders.
She laid a comforting hand on his arm. “Everything’s fine now, although we had a scare the other day.”
“What kind of scare?” His heart galloped faster than King racing through a field.
“Hannah started having early labor pains, but the doctor gave her a tonic that managed to stop them. She’s only been allowed out of bed since yesterday.”
Nolan lunged to his feet, ready to charge through the house to find Hannah.
Iris gripped his arm with surpri
sing strength. “Please sit down. There’s more you need to know.”
On a deep inhale, he resumed his seat and prayed for the patience to handle whatever else she had to say. “Go on.”
The duchess kept a light hand on his arm as though she didn’t quite trust him. “Hannah has been very distressed lately. She seems to be wrestling with some sort of inner demons that she won’t speak about. Part of the issue has been her mother’s arrival. In fact, it was during a rather heated conversation with Ann that Hannah’s pains worsened.”
Nolan gripped the wooden arms of the chair as though he might snap them in two. As soon as he could, he would speak to his mother-in-law about the deplorable way she treated her daughter.
Iris must have seen the anger on his face, for she quickly added, “They have made their peace now, thank the Lord. However, the doctor told us that Hannah must remain calm in order to avoid the contractions starting again. If you wish to see her, you mustn’t upset her. It could cost her the baby—as well as her own life.”
A cold ball of fear lodged in Nolan’s chest. The possibility of losing Hannah was something he could not even let his mind consider. He raised his gaze to Iris. “What do you want me to do?”
“We must take this reunion with extreme caution. First, I must prepare her for your presence. The shock of seeing you without warning would surely send her into labor.”
Nolan bowed his head over his clasped hands. So much for surprising his wife, but perhaps this way was better. His head jerked up at the recollection of the man waiting outside in the carriage and the entourage Nolan expected any moment.
“Perhaps I’d best explain my whole plan, Iris, for I’ll need your help to make it happen.”
Hannah paused at the bottom of the staircase, proud to have managed without the earl’s assistance. She’d awoken with a new determination today, a new strength. The mending of her relationship with her mother, as well as the earl’s unexpected support, had put things into a new perspective. She wasn’t proud to admit it, but she’d been wallowing in self-pity, a most unattractive state, and one she vowed to rectify immediately. And so she had started her morning with a prayer of thanksgiving to God and a resolve to put her trust more firmly in Him. She had to believe that everything would work out as the Lord intended. And that Nolan would find his way back to her.
A Most Noble Heir Page 25