Arousal

by Simone Sowood

  My phone rang, and it was Jenny. She’d never phoned me before. All her arrangements had gone through Daniel. I wanted it that way, to keep some distance between us.

  “Hello.”

  “Collin. Hi.” Her voice didn’t have its usual confidence.

  “Is everything okay? How’s your mother?”

  “Don’t worry, she’s doing well, thanks to you. My family still doesn’t know how to thank you enough.”

  “I keep telling you, stop thanking me. It’s the least I can do.” I didn’t want to tell her the medical cost was chump change to me. She obviously knows I have money, but I don’t think she realizes just how much I actually have. At least she doesn't even seem to care how much I have, unlike that psycho Raylene.

  “I just wanted to ask a favor.”

  “What kind of favor?”

  “Well, Abbie’s finally got a job.”

  “That’s good.” Why is she telling me this?

  “We wanted to go out Friday to celebrate, and I wondered if…”

  “You girls want a good night out at Luscious? No problem, I’ll put your names on the door, just skip the line and talk to the bouncer.”

  “Thank you!” The excitement in her voice made my dick twitch.

  “No problem.”

  “Okay, I’ll talk you later.”

  “Yeah, one more thing, be sure to come find me when you get there.” That wasn’t a request. She’d better have picked up on the demand in my voice.

  “Of course.”

  I hung up and tossed the phone in my hand. I was so looking forward to Friday night. Jenny coming to me in my office to be fucked was much more civilized than me having to wake her up in the middle of the night to mess around in her little one bedroom apartment.

  I hadn’t even broken in my new office in yet. Somehow no other woman in Chicago has done a damn thing to interest me. None were anywhere near as alluring as Jenny.

  Shit. Part of me was more excited to show Jenny my office so she could see what I made of myself. We always talked about it in college. For that year afterwards, when I was trying to get on my feet, Jenny was my biggest cheerleader. Every little success I had back then was made so much sweeter when I shared it with her.

  Now I’m thinking I’ll get a bit of that feeling again. For old time’s sake.

  I couldn’t help but be so fucking pissed off that I fucked up my life so fucking royaly that I couldn’t have her. I knew one thing for sure: I would never bring her down to my level.

  Jenny

  “Hi sweetie, I wanted to call to let you know we’re all ready to fly down to Texas tomorrow and visit the cancer center. The nurse got here earlier today and she’s a real sweetheart.” My father hadn’t sounded so happy in over a year.

  “That’s fantastic dad. I really hope the doctor can offer her something promising.”

  “Well, we’ll find that out this week. Right now we have to think positive and hope for the best.” The sheer joy in his voice brought a tear to my eye. They’d been married for nearly forty years and he’d be utterly lost without her.

  “We can hope, right. This is a whole new chance most people never get.”

  “True. Not many people get flown down from Maine to see the best stomach cancer doctor in the world.”

  “Fingers crossed, right?”

  “Absolutely, your mom is here, grabbing the phone from me.”

  “Hi sweetie.” Her voice was steadier than I’d heard it in months. The hope alone must be doing her some good.

  “Hi mom, all set for your trip tomorrow?”

  “Absolutely, I won’t be able to sleep tonight. I feel like a kid going to Disney World in the morning.” I laughed, at both her words and the happiness her joy caused in me.

  “Keep me posted, I want to know everything that happens.”

  “Tell Collin how much what he’s doing means to us.”

  “I have, repeatedly.”

  “Does this means you’re back together? I hope you’re back together, you were always such a good couple. I never got over his moving away.” You and me both, I thought but didn’t dare say that to her.

  “No, we’re not. We’ve only seen each other a couple of times as friends.”

  “That’s it? And he’s doing all this for me?” Disbelief filled her voice.

  “Crazy, isn’t it? Apparently he’s very rich now and I get this impression this is all pocket change to him.”

  “But still, it must mean he’s carrying a torch for you.”

  “I don’t think so.” I couldn’t keep the laughter out of my voice.

  “Don’t be silly sweetie, even if all the money this is costing him is nothing to him, you don’t hear of any billionaires handing out jets and private nurses and treatment at the world’s best hospital. Trust me, this means something.”

  “No, trust me. He always liked you better than me and he was upset when I told him about your situation. He’s not heartless and you’re not some random stranger on the street.”

  “Well, you can argue all you want, but you’re wrong. It’d be amazing if you married a billionaire and finally gave me grandbaby.” Here we go.

  “Don’t get your hopes up mom. I keep telling you, we’re not together. I’m dating other people.”

  “You are?” Her voice perked up.

  “Yes, why, just today I found someone on an online dating site. He’s handsome and, works in advertising and…”

  “Sure dear, as long as you find someone.” She could always tell when I was lying. It made life as a teenager very difficult for me.

  “Oh, the nurse wants me.”

  “Good luck tomorrow mom, keep me posted.”

  “Thanks sweetie, I love you.”

  “Love you too mom.”

  As soon as I hung up the phone I logged onto Chicagodates. My heart skipped at the notification of a message in my inbox. It quickly sank when I saw his profile. His profile picture was a dick. I clicked away and tried to rid the image from my head. Why would he put a photo of it when it had a near right angle turn in it and his balls looked like they belonged to Sasquatch? To get the embarrassment out of the way up front?

  Maybe I needed to stop waiting for people to contact me and send some messages of my own.

  I scrolled through a few pages of men the dating site had recommended to me. None of them interested me enough to even click into their full profiles. I tried doing a search on men who worked in advertising; at least then I could give my mom a ‘told you so’. But still none of them interested me. A handful looked okay, mediocre really, but I sent them short messages anyway.

  It was probably my profile that was the problem. I spent another forty five minutes updating mine. Including a note that I wasn’t interested in snake photos of any type. Fingers crossed, I hoped I would get some better action from it.

  Collin

  Raylene didn’t let up all week. At least I knew not to answer my phone, but I still had to wait the three seconds before I could delete each of her zillion voice mails.

  I needed to put a block on her number. Which seemed like a wrong thing to do to the mother of your child. Especially when she has current custody of the child. Not that it mattered, I’d hear any emergency from the nanny before her anyway, since Raylene would be too drunk or too disinterested to know herself.

  There’s no good reason she should get a penny of my money, we’d been married less than a year, for fuck’s sake. The things I did for my son. He’s the only reason I married the bitch in the first place.

  Thank fuck I had Daniel to do all the dealings for me. All I really had to do was stress and say ‘no fucking way.’ At least I could if I could bring myself to relax enough. The mere mention of her name made my shoulders tense.

  There were two new private investigators following her, building a case of her being an unfit mother, along with a nanny we’d planted to care for Harlan who was documenting all Raylene’s shit.

  The idea was I’d get Harlan removed from he
r custody. As his father, he’d automatically be given to me. That should take most of the divorce settlement away and discredit her for any claims about my clubs that she might make public.

  My phone beeped with a text message from Raylene.

  I hear you got yourself some old pussy action, does she know about me?

  My mouth hung open as I read the text several more times. To forget her was exactly what I intended to do, however much it was going to cost me. Old pussy? Raylene had to be talking about Jenny. But how in the fuck did she know when she spent her days partying in Honolulu?

  Something was going on, and I knew it was only going to cost me more money.

  I thought Friday would never come. I put on my new suit, Italian silk cut, tailored for me by my guy from Saville Row. He always argued with me about using Italian fabrics, claiming British fabrics were much more hard-wearing and longer lasting. Who cares how long a suit lasts as long as it looks good?

  The club heaved with people, everyone of them lining my pockets with more money. A massive grin spread across my face as I surveyed the dance floor.

  Jenny, Abbie and two other women I didn’t know danced in a little circle. Jenny looked stunning, as always. Her tight black dress clung to her petite frame, and the sight of her made my dick twitch.

  Some blond guy moved in on Abbie, grinding her from behind in a way I wanted to be doing to Jenny.

  “Hey, Blake,” I barked out my office door.

  “Yes Collin?”

  “Go get Jenny for me.” I’d already filled him in ahead of time, he knew who she was. Everyone here had been told to treat her like gold.

  “Will do.”

  I closed my office door and sat down at my desk. Realistically I didn’t have a need for a desk. Aside from fronting the cash and giving the final approval for issues, all I had to do these days was mingle with the VIP clients. For whatever reason, mingling and hanging out with me gave them a thrill.

  They were the ones who spent the real money and meeting me made them feel special, which made them open their wallets even wider. Each one of them spent as much as fifty or a hundred regular customers.

  Hell, they didn’t even bother with Perrier Belle Epoque champagne, since it was only hundreds a bottle. They liked their champagne to be in the four figures and were straight onto special edition Bollingers and Cristals. And my markup on those was huge.

  The door opened and my eyes shot up to see Jenny standing sheepishly in the doorframe, her hands clasped in front of her like she was nervous. I jumped to my feet and walked to her.

  “Babe, you look stunning.” I took each of her hands in mine and pulled them away from her so I could get a good look at her.

  “Thanks.” Her voice was unsure and her lips pursed. I didn’t like it. She should feel comfortable with me. Why the fuck didn’t she feel totally comfortable with me?

  I wrapped my arms around her and drew her close to me, kissing the top of her head as she reached my chest.

  “It’s good to see you here, and dressed.”

  “Dressed? I thought you only wanted me undressed.”

  “Dressed is good so I can do the undressing.” I laughed but remembered how I have to keep this: undressed. Dressed is too much in girlfriend territory, and that’s just not possible. I grabbed her ass and squeezed, sending her the message.

  “So, this is your office,” she said pulling away and looking around.

  “Yeah, what do you think? Come look over here, you can see the dance floor.” I led her to the one way glass and Jenny looked down on the people below.

  “Ha, look, Abbie’s found herself a blond.”

  I didn’t bother to look at the dance floor, I was too busy looking at Jenny. I played with her long, dark hair. The silken strands glided through my fingers, slipped out of my hands and down her back.

  When I inhaled, I’d expected to small the fresh smell of her coconut shampoo. Instead I got a wafting scent I recognized, but it couldn’t be. How would Jenny be wearing Clive Christianson perfume when it’s four figures a bottle? The Jenny I knew would never care about wasting her money on something like that. Could she even afford to buy it if she wanted it that bad?

  Her shoulders were bare except for a thin strap and I put my hands on her soft skin. I wondered if she had a bra on. The thought sent blood straight to my dick and It took everything I had to suppress the urge to bend her over my desk and fuck her hard right that second.

  First I wanted her to get comfortable here. I didn’t want her feeling awkward around me or in my office. Jenny needed to know she was always welcome here. So long as she didn’t get the wrong idea.

  Jenny spun around and plunked herself on the leather sofa. Her amber eyes looked up at me, like they were pleading for something. I sat down beside her, putting my arm around her shoulder.

  “Thanks for getting us in here tonight.” She smiled at me, the same pinched lip smile she always used when she felt out of place or nervous. Some things never change, but I never once thought I’d ever be the person on the receiving end of one of those smiles.

  “Babe, you and your friends are always welcome here.”

  Her pinched lip smile stayed on her face, and it fucking pained me to see it. I ran my hand through her hair until I cupped the back of her head. Her amber eyes drew me in, and I couldn’t stop staring at them, wishing I could dive inside them. Her lips parted slightly, not enough to be relaxed, but enough to take the pinched look from her cheeks.

  Her eyes pulled away from mine and shifted to the floor. She twisted the hem of her short dress in her fingers, revealing even more of her shapely thighs.

  “I, uh, I don’t know,” she said.

  “What babe, what don’t you know?” I tried to coax the words out of her.

  “It’s just, I worry we’re taking up where we left off.” Her voice was so quiet I strained to hear her. It took me a minute to get over the surprise of what she’d said.

  “Baby, whatever is between us is exactly whatever you want it to be,” I paused to laugh, “as long as you don’t expect to get married and have children or anything.”

  Jenny’s face shuddered at my comment, the look impossible to miss. She regained her composure just as fast. I’d always admired her ability to react so quickly to a situation or comment. It would take me ten minutes to get to the same conclusion as something she could reason through in seconds.

  The pinched lip smile reappeared as she looked at me. It killed me to realize she was still hurting after the way I left things when I moved to London. I’d never wanted to hurt her. Hell, I’d never even wanted to leave her. Which is I guess why I didn’t have enough balls to tell her we were over when I moved away.

  But there’s no way to change the past. I thought enough time had passed between us. That we’d have a nice little fling to get all my Jenny hang-ups out of my system for good.

  “I don’t know what we’re doing. This all seems so crazy.”

  “We’re not doing anything, just having some fun is all.” I leaned over and kissed the fleshy bit of her neck. She’d applied perfume right above it and I drank it in.

  Jenny twisted her body, taking her neck away from me. She lifted her hand, motioned it around the room and stood and walked to my desk.

  “You did great, just like I always knew you would,” she said as her eyes flicked up to mine. I couldn’t help but smile, a broad involuntary smile that took over my whole face.

  “You always were my biggest believer, babe.”

  “I just wish I’d bought stock in you.”

  I held her eyes in mine, my vision narrowed by my smile.

  “I’m a private company, you can’t buy stock.” She looked over at me with a coyness in her eye.

  “You could’ve given me some private stock. Isn’t that what you used to tell me? That you were doing all this for me?”

  I looked away, both embarrassed and pissed. She was right, I did used to tell her that. But those words were forgotten at some point du
ring the party that was Paris.

  That was my first solo club, and I pulled in money faster than they could throw it at me. The kind of money that would fuck up the head of any twenty-three year old.

  Why didn’t I fly her out to live with me in Paris? Because I’m a fucking idiot, that’s why.

  Those bad choices are only magnified now that she’s sitting here beside me. Now it’s too late. I can’t pull her into the way my life turned out. All I can do is wonder about the way my life would’ve turned out if I hadn’t left her behind. I shook my head.

  “It’s too bad things turned out the way they did, baby.” From across the room, Jenny’s amber eyes searched my face for something.

  “I don’t know what you’re sorry about. From what I read on the internet, you’re loaded. That’s what you always wanted isn’t it? To be rich?”

  For a moment I almost told her about Raylene, how we got together, and about my need to get my son Harlan away from her so I can give him a straight upbringing. But I decided against it.

  This wasn’t a relationship, I didn’t need to tell her everything I’ve done since I left Chicago. I didn’t need to do anything that would make her think less of me. What I needed was to make sure she’d keep falling into my arms. There was no way I could resist her now I’d had another taste of her.

  My office door flung open and Blake burst in.

  “Quick, Collin, there’s a problem in the VIP lounge,” Blake said, his brow furrowed.

  I jumped to my feet. A new nightclub can’t afford any issues or the neighbors and cops would be all over us from the start.

  “What’s going on?”

  “Some fucker in a suit is pummeling another guest.”

  We strode out of my office, Jenny tagging along behind. The VIP lounge was on the same level as my office. Sometimes I invited guests into my office for a private drink and I needed the route to be nice. We walked down the dimly lit, soundproofed hallway lined with weird gold and silver shit the interior designer had chosen.