Jake groaned. How much longer could he hold off? Did he want to hold off? He wanted her so bad every muscle of his body was tensed and there was a roaring in his ears. He lowered her to the couch cushions, his body covering hers. Tye's leg came up, curved around the back of his legs, her body tightly against him. She gave him everything in herself, the intensity of emotion she stored inside. To Jake, he felt as if he were in a twister, emotion pulling at him, trying to rip him apart. The past tried to hold him in its grip, but he pushed that aside. All he thought of now was this moment with this woman. A woman he had lost once, but now he had her. They had each other, for however long it lasted.
Trying to slow down, Jake held her face to him with cupped palms, kissed her deeply, the fragrance of her skin winding around him. He slid the blouse from her shoulders, let his mouth plunder soft skin, run lovingly over the hollows revealed. She felt so good, he wanted to explore each sensation, each part of her body. Tye tried to be tough, but Jake felt the tremble of her limbs. He sensed the vulnerable core inside her. He wanted to find it, touch it, hold it.
Tye moaned as if she liked the feel of his mouth on her soft breasts. Jake traced his tongue over her skin, following the delicate veins under the skin of her throat. Her fingers pulled the hair on his chest. She splayed her fingers and touched his nipples. Jake dropped his full weight on her, feeling her hips thrusting up against him.
It seemed to Jake they played a dance without music, words unnecessary.
"I want you with me, Jake."
Tye's whispered words smashed Jake's last bit of self-control. He abandoned the idea of going slow and pulled his shirt over his head, then slanted his mouth over Tye's soft lips. He kicked his boots off, yanked his jeans down, saw Tye fumble to do the same with hers. When her fingers couldn't pull open her jeans snap, he gently pushed her hands aside. Slowly, driving himself closer to the edge, he watched the button come through the slit, then slowly, tooth by tooth, he lowered the zipper on her jeans. Torture; pure, wonderful, slow torture.
"Jake." Tye gripped his hands tightly, then pressed them to her flesh. "Don't torment me."
Jake watched the deep intensity on her face, and for a moment, he thought he saw fear. He felt uncertainty touch him. Was he doing the right thing, letting Tye into his life? What if she left again? Not what if, Jake reminded himself, when she left.
Jake didn't want to doubt what they were doing was right, not when he felt so involved, so connected to this woman. Tye arched up against him as Jake splayed his fingers across her belly. He dropped his mouth to the slight hollow of her stomach, kissing a path across the smooth skin.
Tye writhed beneath him, and he soothed her with kisses, his mouth on her skin as he knelt above her, drawing air into his lungs, trying to catch his breath. Her blue eyes, clouded with passion, told him what she wanted and it was what he wanted, too. It seemed like they had waited too long already.
"Slow," Jake said hoarsely, hardly recognizing his own voice. "Go slow. I love your skin, so soft, so soft..." Sweat beaded his brow, he felt it. It was a tremendous effort to go easy, not to engulf her. Jake’s hands shook, he felt like this was his first time. He almost wished it was. He was struck with wonder and reverence for this fiercely independent woman.
Jake let his hand slide down her thigh, gently traced scar tissue, then smooth muscle, feeling the goose bumps rise under his touch. He gently traced the straps. Tye’s trembling hand covered his, but she didn't stop him. She seemed to go still and wait for his next move, her body suddenly very still.
Jake held himself quiet, knew in the next few seconds there would be no going back. He felt the weight of the responsibility he had undertaken. Tye’s scarred flesh was there for him to see. Gently, he traced the slightly pinkish skin, drew her quivering response into himself.
He didn’t want to hurt Tye.
He feared he would.
Slowly, carefully, knowing she watched him, Jake undid the straps. Giving both of them time, he removed the artificial limb and rolled down the stump socks.
#
Tye watched Jake look at her stump. This was what she had wanted, to be loved and touched by Jake, but now she waited, almost afraid to breathe. Would he be repulsed, distressed? Could she bear it if he got up and walked away? So many questions crowding her mind. The vulnerability she felt terrified her and she wasn't someone who ran scared. Never had she depended so much on another human being's thoughts and reactions. Tye prayed that if Jake walked away, she could handle it. She watched him, biting her lips anxiously, emotion tight in her chest, feeling as if something important hinged on his reaction.
As if he knew about her fears Jake lifted his eyes to hers. "It's okay," he said in a low voice, perhaps guessing at the tumult of fear twisting her insides. "It's okay, Tye."
Some of the coldness receded. Tye felt heat pool in her cheeks, her face. A shudder passed through her, pulling some of the tension away. Gathering her courage, Tye decided he might as well see everything. She needed to know Jake's reaction to this most vulnerable part of her body, her residual stump. It took precedence over everything else at the moment, even the heat of their lovemaking. She wanted to be emotionally connected to Jake, not just physically. He had seen her leg before, but now it was so much more intimate. His reaction so much more vital to her.
Jake's gaze left hers and he looked at her leg. Gently, he traced his fingers over the sensitive flesh. Tye drew in a quivering breath, her leg jerking involuntarily. She was surprised by the sensitivity of her skin to his touch. The limb near the incision had always felt vaguely numb of feeling.
Solemnly, Jake said, "You're a strong, beautiful woman, Tye. This only makes you more so."
Tears came to her eyes. How had Jake found the right words to say? He made her feel special, strong and loved. Tye tipped her head back, closing her eyes as Jake ran his mouth over one thigh, then the other. Heat began to rise again. Tye ignored the wetness that wanted to burn from her lids as she pulled Jake's mouth to hers. How had she gotten so lucky to find Jake again? She'd be crazy to let him get away. Crazy. The tears gathered force and collected in her throat, but she swallowed them.
"Now, Jake. I want you now," she said, her voice deep-throated, demanding. She wanted to give him all of herself. She was so full of emotion and want. Jake’s tenderness had increased those feelings tenfold.
"I understand the want, my body's saying the same, but I don't have any protection ―"
Tye watched him pull away. She shook her head, feeling lightheaded. "Don't leave."
"Damn! We can't ― I won't take a chance."
"In ― in my bathroom cabinet, there's some packets." She touched his shoulder with her lips. "I like to be prepared for any eventuality. I bought them last week." Hoping Jake would make love to her. She had seen those packets every night when she brushed her teeth and each time regret sliced through her that they hadn't used them yet.
Jake grinned at her. "Last week, huh?" He dropped a quick kiss on her mouth and with a fluid movement, lifted her up against his chest. Jake carried her into her bedroom, pushed the covers aside and settled her on the bed. He turned and walked across the room. Tye put her head back on the cool pillow, watching him through heavy-lidded eyes. His body was big and well muscled. Soon, it would be hers. She shivered on the bed, rolling over to watch him as he walked back into the room, apparently undisturbed by his nudity. Tye tried not to stare at the most interesting part of his anatomy, but she got caught. She felt the color move into her cheeks.
With a big grin, Jake slid down beside her, the single mattress giving beneath his weight.
Wide-eyed, Tye watched him toss all but one of the packets onto the bedside table. A slow grin lifted her lips as he tore open the foil. "Oh, my, all those?"
"I'm optimistic," he said, leaning down to nuzzle her neck.
She forgot about the foil packets as she and Jake touched skin to skin once more. "Now, Jake."
Clenching his jaw, Jake thrust forward. Tye sti
ffened slightly as pain streaked through her. Jake froze.
Dropping his forehead to hers, Jake looked in her eyes. "Tye." He began to pull away.
Tye gripped his arm, her nails biting into the muscle. "No, Jake, don't. It's okay."
She drew a deep breath.
Jake felt it all the way to his toes. "Damn, you told me that you'd never ― but ―" He hadn’t really believed her.
Tye put her mouth to his, silencing him, silencing his inner demons. Slowly, their lips met and played.
Jake held very still, but Tye foiled that as she arched up against him, her eyes closed, her lips parting in a sultry smile. "That feels good, Jake...so good."
Jake looked at Tye, her cheeks flushed, eyes heavy lidded. He leaned down to kiss her brow, nuzzling her cheek. She was so giving, so warm. Tye continued to move and tantalize him. Jake gritted his teeth.
Tye suddenly went still. She looked up at him, holding herself locked against him. "Did I hurt you?" she whispered.
Incredulously, Jake made his eyes focus on her face. "God, no. It just feels so ― so fantastic."
Tye began to smile. "Then don't stop. No thinking allowed," she murmured. Dropping back to the mattress she lifted her arms to pull him down. Carefully, he moved forward until they were as close as possible, thigh to thigh.
Jake twisted his hips, feeling her body, and his, shaking with reaction, one so hard, the other yielding, taking. An exquisite sensation began to rock him.
He closed his eyes, wanting to hold onto the feeling of having Tye so close. They filled each other, emotionally, physically, fully, again and again.
Gradually, the ripples of desire receded, leaving Tye quiet against Jake. They clung tightly to each other, and Jake pulled the sheet up over them, feeling the chill of their sweat-dampened bodies. Tye turned her head to look at him, no small wonder in her eyes.
"Wow," she said simply, then allowed a big smile to light her face.
Jake returned the look, putting up a hand to brush the hair back from her smooth forehead. "I second that," he agreed, attempting to come to grips with what had just occurred. Making love had felt so right with Tye, as if they were connected on all levels. Had she felt the same? God! How do you explain a shaking sensation and strength at the same time?
"Why Tye?" Jake shook his head in bewilderment. "I can’t believe you’ve given me something so special, so precious..."
Tye ducked her head as if to avoid his scrutiny. Jake frowned, placing a finger under her chin and urging her face upwards. He had to understand what was going on inside her head. It seemed vitally important to know why she had remained a virgin.
"Tye?"
Tye shrugged. "The time and circumstance just never seemed right, Jake."
Jake swallowed hard, his mind reeling from the knowledge that he was the only man to know Tye intimately. "You’re a beautiful woman Tye, I just wish I could claim the same innocence." Knowledge hit Jake in the face and he felt his mind go slack. He meant it. He wished, for that moment in time, that he could turn the clock back. Jake thought back to the years which had been full of responsibility, and yet he’d kept himself empty of this type of emotion. That strange feeling of emptiness had intensified when he saw Tye again. The feeling had begun to grow from the time he’d found her picture. Had he suppressed his feelings all these years? Work, family, obligations...
A slight chill touched him. Tye was recovering from her accident. He could see her confidence increase with each day. He'd helped her along the road to recovery, but soon, she would move out. What did she truly feel for him? Jake wasn’t sure what he felt for her. But the idea of caring for her again filled him with hope, and despair.
Jake knew Tye's reticence regarding commitment; her love of rodeo. She'd made no secret of her preference for a single lifestyle. She was still the same woman from ten years ago.
"Maybe we should have gone slower, Tye." He felt her stiffen beside him. The dreamy look hovering in her eyes changed, and Jake stifled a groan of impatience at his inability to accept things as they were.
"Let’s not have a post mortem here, Jake. Why can’t we just enjoy what we’ve found together again? It doesn’t have to be anything more than that."
"You’re right," he said, feeling the old anger wind around him.
Jake knew Tye was an independent woman. A woman who had gotten along fine without a man in her life. She apparently hadn't felt the need to be in a relationship until now. Why had she chosen him as her lover?
"Jake?"
Hearing the uncertainty in Tye's voice, Jake tightened his arm around her shoulders. "Are you okay?" he asked in a low voice, pushing aside his own concerns. They had both gone into this with eyes wide open. Too late for regrets. What was done was done.
Lifting one brow, Tye indicated the unopened foil packets on the side table. Giving him a brash smile, she snuggled closer into his chest.
Jake felt the heat rise. How could he ever think of pushing her away?
"I feel more than okay," Tye said, voice sultry, one brow raised provocatively. "I’m resting up for the encore."
There was nothing else for Jake to do but pull her closer. How could he resist? He'd wanted her for what seemed too long. He'd never satiate himself in one night, but he could try.
#
Jake stayed the entire night with Tye. They held each other close in the single bed. Early in the morning, before he left for work, Tye stirred to fleeting kisses along her shoulder. She and Jake made love slowly, as if it were the first time all over again, only much better. Tye knew what to expect...Jake was a generous lover. Just thinking about him now made her shiver with aftershocks from their lovemaking.
Long after Jake left, Tye couldn't stop thinking about him. Their time together had been like hot molten fire. She'd never wanted to be so close to another man the way she yearned for Jake. He gave her something essential, filling that empty place inside her. Despite the pain of the years in between, the wait had been worth it. Never could Tye have guessed they’d end up lovers after the misery of their parting ten years before. Had she subconsciously been waiting for Jake? Tye shook her head. That was too crazy, but it also felt too close to the truth.
Tye hugged herself, pulling the soft sheets up under her chin. Jake was as clear as water, there were no ulterior motives to his caring. He didn't give two hoots about her career, the money she had made or the brief walk of fame she had traveled.
Tye looked at her prosthesis lying on the bedside table. Jake hadn't been repelled, he had removed it without flinching. Through his care, Jake had managed to help her restore a measure of wholeness, something she hadn't felt since the accident.
They hadn't discussed what had happened between them...what would happen in the future. Tye wasn't prepared to talk about an involvement until she had had time to put distance and thought into this new phase of their relationship.
Tye got a certain queasiness when she thought about love and forever. Her unconventional upbringing got in the way. Mama had loved Daddy unconditionally, and she'd been hurt time and again until Daddy finally left. Even as a child Tye had understood Daddy was involved with other women. What was to keep any man from going elsewhere? Jake cared about her, she knew it. Maybe he loved her, even though he hadn’t put it into words.
The thought of walking away from Jake was unbearable. Tye Jenkins, daring and audacious, knew she had to take this seriously. Love and relationships were topics she needed to do some real soul searching about. She and Jake could take it one day at a time, see how things developed. She didn’t want to make the same mistakes of the past.
With a secret smile, Tye slid down into the sheets. Of course, in the meantime there was nothing to keep them from exploring all the interesting aspects of a relationship. She wished he hadn't left so soon, she could think of a few aspects they hadn't touched on last night.
§ Chapter Fourteen §
Tye watched Jake skim the pool's surface with the nylon bug net. Lazily, she admired the
smooth line of his bare back, the taut pull of his cutoff shorts against tanned legs. She hadn't seen him in a suit and tie in days. In fact, she hadn't seen much more on him than the shorts he wore now and sometimes far less than that. He had stayed home from work almost the entire week. She was a bad influence on him, but he didn't seem to mind. They spent a lot of time beside the pool, and it felt like they had created their own world.
As Jake turned, Tye's gaze snagged on the dark hair covering his chest and flat stomach, dreamily recalling its soft texture against her breasts and belly when they made love. Just thinking of making love with Jake caused Tye’s heart rate to increase.
Tye was minus her prosthesis, and amazingly, she felt more and more comfortable to be beside Jake this way. He had seen her without it each night since that first night almost a week ago when they had made love. It had somehow managed to become less significant in her mind.
Feeling like a kid with her first crush, Tye allowed her eyes to trace the smattering of freckles across Jake's one shoulder. They had gone horseback riding last night. It had been a companionable ride and they had let the horses walk the entire time while they talked. When they returned to the barn near dusk Jake had laughingly half-pushed, half-carried her up the narrow loft stairs. On a scratchy wool blanket they had made frenzied love by the open hay mow door. Tye knew the scent of fresh green hay would forever be imprinted on her mind when she thought of Jake.
Tye couldn't ever remember feeling so happy or content, not even the summer she and Jake first fell in love. Tye knew her feelings for Jake had more depth than at seventeen. She recognized the difference lay in her own maturity, but if she allowed herself to dwell on the past, she began to feel anxious. They had a good thing going, a wonderful wholeness together and she didn't want to mess it up. Tye stared hard at Jake. She knew her time here was growing short. When would it end?
Wishing on a Rodeo Moon (Women of Character) Page 15