Sophia’s throat tightened, and she swallowed. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry?” Xavier laughed. “Sorry for what?”
“For not being there…”
He silenced her next words with a tender kiss. Surrendering, Sophia felt safe and secure again. She had to fight the impulse not to cling to him when he then drew away, eyeing her with a hint of apprehension.
“You were there,” he said. “You were always there.” He kissed her once more, taking his time before releasing her. “You and I made this notebook when we were together that summer. I was the artist, and you were my muse. I wanted you to see our past as a whole. Past, present, and future. You’ve always been a part of my life, my designs, and I’ve never forgotten you.”
Sophia blushed and looked away.
“You see,” he continued. “You and I both had a love of fashion.” He tucked a wisp of hair behind her ear. “Of beautiful things. When you left that summer, I didn’t think I’d ever get that feeling back. I wanted it. Wanted you. When I met Diera, all the pieces fell into place. I knew it would only be a matter of time before we were together again. So this is what I put every ounce of my life into.”
Her lips quivered. She couldn’t believe Xavier had kept the two of them together all that time with just an idea and a name. All that time, XS had stood for Xavier and Sophia.
Xavier took hold of her chin and turned her face to him. “Don’t cry. This is good. All of this is good.”
She rubbed her eyes dry. “I know, I know. It’s just—well…”
“Yes,” he said before she could finish her sentence. “I have loved you all this time, and I have always held you close to my heart. I want you with me, Sophia. It’s all I’ve always wanted.”
She curled her arms around him. The warmth of his body could be felt through the sheet separating them. His arm around her waist, fingers stroking her back, soothed her.
“Tell me again,” she said against his ear.
“I love you.”
“And I you.” She drew back, allowing the sheet between them to slither away, leaving them heat on heat.
Chapter Seventeen
THE NEXT FEW DAYS were spent in a flurry of activity at places all around Long Island. They’d spent an entire day shopping in Eastport. Xavier took Sophia to a Whaling Museum, Westbury Gardens, and a quaint little restaurant called the Sip’n Soda. They’d been to these places before, that summer long ago, and Xavier wanted her to see each one again.
The days weren’t long enough to learn about the past, nor were the nights enough to cool the steam between them. Waking up next to the only person she’d ever loved made Sophia feel complete. It was perfect, and she was afraid the rug might be jerked out from under her at any time. She scolded herself for that thought, knowing that Xavier loved her just as much as she loved him. Nothing could keep them apart now.
Sophia licked a vanilla ice cream cone as the two of them sat on a bench. She settled herself in his lap, their legs intertwined. She loved the way the ocean’s spring breeze felt against her skin and the way Xavier’s arm felt curled around her. She eyed him carefully, wondering what he was thinking as he gazed out into the orange horizon. To think he’d spent all those years searching for her, building up a fashion line in memory of her, and always hoping she’d find him again. It had to have been the longest decade of his life.
“Ten years is a long time to be apart,” Sophia said. “Thank you…for waiting for me.”
Xavier’s grin was quick. “I would have waited ten more.”
She played with the wrapper at the base of her cone. “Love is powerful. And I didn’t realize how powerful until you showed me that notebook the other night.”
He touched a fingertip to her bare knee, swirling little circles.
“But why, Xavier?” she asked. “Besides the love, besides the fashion…why?”
His finger froze. He looked at her then, a flash of hurt in those electric eyes. “Because you saved me.”
Sophia sighed heavily. “How?”
He had saved her. From her family, from the life she’d hated, and even from herself. How had she really done anything to help him—besides cause him pain?
“You remember me telling you about my parents dying when I was young and my grandparents taking Bryant and me in, right?”
She nodded and took another lick of her ice cream cone before it melted.
He didn’t break eye contact as he continued talking. “Bryant and I didn’t exactly love the arrangement at first. We were angry because of our parents’ death, always thinking the world was out to get us.”
Sophia nodded. Those were normal feelings to have when losing a parent so young—let alone both parents.
“Gram and Pap gave us strict rules and curfews, wanted to know all of our friends and whereabouts.” He rolled his shoulders. “It was hard time for everyone. Not only had we lost our parents, but Gram and Pap had lost their only son.”
She touched a hand to his cheek. “I’m so sorry.”
Xavier gave her a wavering half-grin. He still felt the loss of their deaths, she could see, even if he didn’t admit it to himself.
“It was a long time ago. We’ve learned to cope since then. But thank you. It still hurts to think of them and all the things we missed out on together.” He broke his stare and focused on the sea. “I miss them.”
Sophia rubbed his back, hoping her touch was enough to help him through the conversation. She hadn’t known that by asking that question she’d drudge up things from his past.
“You don’t have to tell me, Xavier.”
His eyes locked on her again. “No, I want to. It’s important for you to understand why I fought so hard to find you. Why I did the things I did and run the company the way I run it. It’s all because of you, Sophia.”
She kissed him, gently. The taste of his vanilla ice cream mingled with her chocolate. “Then please do.”
“It wasn’t long after Gram and Pap’s rules became more like guidelines to me. Bryant wasn’t much into troublemaking, but he began to fail at school. Didn’t care about the way he looked or smelled, for that matter. He became a one-man couch potato. I, on the other hand, became a one-man wrecking machine. Destroying school property. Ditching. A recreational drug or two. Vandalism. Theft.” He heaved in a deep breath. “That summer, the one when you came here, started off with a bang for me. On the fourth of July, my friends and I thought it would be fun to put bottle rockets in our neighbor’s gas tank. The fire station didn’t think that was funny. No one did. We almost burned down the whole damn block.”
Sophia’s eyes grew wide, and she snuggled even closer against him, his warmth. The cold dribble of her now untouched ice cream cone cascaded down her fingers. This was the history her grandmother had mentioned.
“Thank God no one was hurt,” he continued. “I was under eighteen, and the judge didn’t want to try me as an adult. Probation, restitution, and counseling were in my future. I didn’t think I would make it. And then I met you.”
Sophia tilted her head at him. “What made me so special?”
He chuckled. “You really don’t see how good you are, do you?”
Her cheeks grew warm. “No.”
“When I met you on the beach that day, you were so full of life and beautiful. Talking about everything you wanted to accomplish. You acted thirty instead of seventeen. I was in awe of you.”
He grabbed the lopsided cone from her hand and chucked it in the garbage next to him. He drew her hand, covered in driblets of melted chocolate, to his mouth. Making sure his eyes never left hers, he licked every last drop of ice cream from her fingers. Sophia’s whole body shuddered.
“I’d known you were well-to-do, which is why Bryant didn’t think I stood a chance with you. You were graceful and poised, well-mannered and sweet. Yet not at all like I pictured a high-society girl from London. You wanted to read books to children at the library. Hand out food at the homeless shelter. Volunteer at the Boys and
Girls Club. You, Sophia, wanted to give back while you were here. You said America gave you the opportunities to do things your parents didn’t allow you to back home. I saw your generosity, your genuine love of people who were less fortunate than you, and I was addicted. To you.” His fingers curled around hers. “You showed me that no matter your background, no matter your class, people could survive on two things: love and care.”
Sophia’s heart was a mushy puddle, same as her ice-cream cone lying at the bottom of the trashcan.
“But how did that save you?” she asked.
“Because I wanted to be like you. Love like you. Care like you. You always looked at everything like you were looking at it for the first time. Open-minded and wide-eyed. You made a difference in the short time you were here. I wanted to make a lifetime of differences.”
She smiled. “Which is why XS does so much philanthropy work.”
“Exactly.” He squeezed her hand. “You saved me that summer, and now I do my best by saving others. Helping as much as I can. The notebook always reminded me of that…of you. And now I see, even though you are different, Sophia, you’re still the same on the inside.”
Tears pricked Sophia’s eyes. She had saved him, just as he had saved her. Lifestyles and society rungs aside, they belonged together. Forever.
The morning sun was muted through the curtains as they lay entangled in the sheets on the bed.
“Last day,” Xavier whispered as he tugged Sophia close and kissed her cheek.
“Yeah.” She tucked her head into the crook of his shoulder. “It’s sad. I’ve really enjoyed it here. With you.”
He gently pushed a stray lock of hair behind her ear and smiled as he pressed his lips to her temple.
“What are we going to do when I have to go back home?”
He dipped his head to look at her face. “Don’t worry about that now. Let’s focus on today first. We have somewhere special to go.” His lips formed a quick, playful smile.
“You know best,” she said lightheartedly as she rose out of bed. She stretched, and the caress of his fingertips along her skin made her fight the urge to lie back down. Walking toward the bathroom, she felt his eyes on her, watching every stride with male appreciation.
As she showered, she thought about how much she had missed during the years spent apart from Xavier. There were still more questions than answers, and a part of her wanted to have the same memories he had of their young relationship. She wanted to know how it felt. And yet it seemed as though everything she’d been missing was sitting in the next room, waiting to fulfill any future need she might have. She was ready to give herself to him for the rest of her life.
Pulling the towel off her head, Sophia brushed her hair and quickly dressed in jeans and a warm sweater. Yes, she could just continue on that wonderful path and cherish all the memories that were yet to come. Even if she never got her memory back, Xavier would always be there, holding her and loving her. She just hoped he understood there were parts of her she might never retrieve.
Walking down to the kitchen, Sophia crossed its threshold—and there he was, her love, standing proud as he looked out the window. His hair glistened, and his eyes were bright as the morning sky. He looked delectable in his dark-wash jeans and long-sleeved, snug-fitting red knit shirt.
“Hey,” she said.
He smiled when he turned and saw her. “Hey to you, too.”
Before she could take a step toward him, he was there, his arms curling around her possessively as he captured her lips with a warm and enticing kiss. Her body instantly ignited, longing for more. His familiar, sweet honey scent engulfed her, making her whole in places she’d never thought she could be.
“You look beautiful this morning.” His words came out with a growl. “I had to give you a proper good-morning kiss.”
The words were so innocent. So simple, so easy.
“I’ll be sure to remind you to kiss me, should you ever forget.” She drew him in for another kiss. Memories or not, she had Xavier now.
When their lips parted, Xavier’s hunger flared. “We better go before we get preoccupied.”
She laughed carelessly as he brushed his fingers across her cheek, and the sound filled him with the joy he had missed for so many years. He would never get enough of her. An eternity would never be enough.
Yet, as he led her to the car and watched her frame slide down into the seat, he knew they had too much time to make up for. Damn her mother. But he couldn’t think about that now. By the end of the day, Sophia would be his for the rest of their lives.
After a rather far drive, the car was flanked on both sides by thick green pine trees and tall barren oaks. The road became narrower, winding through the dense brush.
“Ah, Westfall Park,” Xavier said with a hint of satisfaction in his voice. He rubbed his hand on the inside of Sophia’s thigh and gave her a wicked smile. “This is the one place I’ve been dying to show you.”
Sophia arched her brow at him. “Is that so?”
He nodded as his grin widened. “That’s so.” He raked his gaze over her arms and legs. He had wanted to do this for a long time. “The weather’s not the best, but we’ll make do.”
Xavier parked the car next to a small pebbled path. He helped Sophia out of the car and put both hands on her hips before going in for another passionate kiss. His hand caressed the side of her face as he moved away, the glint of longing in her eyes making him satisfied in all the right ways. He popped the trunk and lifted out a blanket and a basket.
“Are you warm enough with that jacket?”
Sophia zipped up her fleece. “Yes. And if not, I’ve got you, right?”
Her mischievous grin made Xavier chuckle. “This way,” he said, pulling her toward the path.
Tall trees were all around them, and bright beams of sun slanted through the empty limbs. The dense surroundings staved off any cold wind, keeping Xavier warmer than expected. He held Sophia close with his free arm, never once breaking contact. Her face as they walked amused him. She looked excited, anxious, and simply glowing. They hiked for almost fifteen minutes before Xavier stopped in the middle of the gravel path.
Xavier leaned over and kissed her nose. “Are you okay?”
“Um, yeah. I guess I’m just confused.”
He laughed and took her by the hand. “This is where we go off-road.” He pursed his lips and looked down at her flats. “I probably should have told you to wear boots for this.”
“For what?”
“We’re going that way.” He pointed toward the thick woods. Nothing but condensed trees and wiry underbrush stood before them.
“In there?”
He tugged her close and nuzzled his cheek next to hers. “Don’t you trust me?” His breath washed over the sensitive lobe of her ear.
She trembled. “Yes.”
“Come on, then.” He directed her into the darkness of the trees. “Let me show you something you’ll wish you could remember.”
It didn’t take long hiking through the thick gloom of the forest before they stepped into a clearing. The trees retreated into the distance, and a large field rolled with mounds of tall grass that always remained surprisingly green, even in late winter. The clearing stopped about fifty yards in front of them where the grass met the line of sky. There were no trees along the far edge. Yellow Easter lilies already in bloom dotted the area in clusters. The sun shone down from overhead, making the entire area bright and warm. Sophia angled her head to the light and let it warm her face.
“It’s beautiful,” she said as she smiled at Xavier.
“It’s better in the summer,” he commented. “But no matter the time of year, you are far more beautiful than this could ever be.”
Sophia would have sunk into a boneless heap right then had Xavier not enclosed his strong arm around her waist and led her further along. She could hear the sound of rushing water getting closer with each step they took. As they made their way to the edge of the clearing, the chill
y wind kicked up, and she smelled the salt air of the sea.
“Close your eyes.”
She obeyed with total trust, yet her heart thundered like an elephant stampede in her chest. She heard Xavier shuffle around and drop the items he carried. His warm hands slid into hers as he dragged her close to his body. They took several more steps together and came to a stop on what felt like a jumble of rocks.
“Open your eyes, Sophia, and see the first place we made love.”
Again, she obeyed. To her left was the clearing they had just walked through. And to her right…Oh my goodness. A waterfall streamed down the granite face of a tall rocky cliff. Thick brown moss clung to the jagged edges. The water poured through the hills and valleys of glistening rocks, down a hundred feet to the ocean. The sun beat rays of color through the water, arcing from the surface into a flawless rainbow.
She turned to Xavier, who was watching her curiously.
“Words can’t describe what I feel right now,” she said in a quivering tone. From the top of her head to the tip of her toes, her body shivered uncontrollably. But panic replaced excitement when her body churned from the inside out, and she couldn’t stop the trembling. When her eyes met Xavier’s, he gathered her close.
“Are you okay? Is it too cold?”
She put her hand to her head to shake off the feeling. “No…no. I’m fine. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry.” He led her to the quilt he had laid out on the tall grass. “Sit down and rest.”
He shrugged off his jacket and draped it over her shoulders. Her head fell to the side, and she inhaled his scent. The feeling still didn’t fade. She felt like she’d just run a marathon. And she was still shaking.
“I’m tired,” she said, her voice uneasy.
Xavier tucked her closer and kissed the top of her head. His heart pounded against her ear, and she could hear his deep breath. Sophia slipped her arms around him and closed her eyes. It felt good to relax beneath his strength, to let his warmth and love cloak her.
Recaptured Dreams Page 17