Deadly Vows

by Haley Stuart

  “I’m so sorry, baby.”

  I can see the sorrow and regret filling his steel-gray irises. Before I can say anything, my climax comes out of nowhere, my inner muscles clamping down on his thick length as he plunges in and out of me. His thrusts become more urgent, and he stiffens above me. I can feel his cock pulsing inside of me as he finds his release. He collapses on top of me but doesn’t pull out. He picks me off the table, and we slide down on the floor.

  As I catch my breathing, I place my ear on his chest and close my eyes. His heart is beating strong underneath me. I remember his words.

  “As long as it’s beating, I will protect you.”

  I can feel him kissing the top of my head.

  “I fucked up. You were mine to protect, and I fucked up. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I left you alone. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.”

  I look up at him, placing my hand on his face once again. I reach up and run my finger over the scar. “I thought you were dead,” I whisper. “I thought … you died.”

  He grabs my palm and kisses it. “I almost did.”

  More tears fall down my face. “What happened?” I whisper.

  “Everything had been taken care of. All that was left was for me and Romelo to fill out our duties. The bastard was a coward. He had rigged his whole house to blow. And he did it with me in it. The force of the explosion almost killed me, propelling me into the wall that fell and crushed me. I had a cracked skull and multiple broken bones.”

  That must be the reason his hair is shorter now.

  “Lucky for me, Nicolai’s cleanup didn’t last as long as we’d anticipated, and after checking to see if Romelo needed backup, he showed up just in time to find me in the rubble. I’ve been in a medically induced coma up until a few weeks ago.”

  My breathing hitches. Luca has almost died. He really has almost gone from me, forever. I roll over so that my naked body is straddling his hips. His eyes visibly darken as he watches me. I grab ahold of his face in mine and kiss him. Really kiss him.

  * * * * *

  I stand in my bedroom, getting dressed. Luca says he’ll watch Luciano while I clean myself up. I am about to walk back in the room when I pause in the archway. Luca is standing with his back to me, holding Luciano in his arms.

  “I almost missed you. I almost didn’t get to watch you grow up. I almost messed up my promise to protect you.” He leans down and kisses Luciano on his forehead. “I love you. No matter what, I will be a better father than mine ever was to me. There will be times when you hate me, and I’m okay with that, as long as you know how much I love you, mi figlio. I love you so much.”

  Luca turns around and gives me a small smile, holding one arm out for me to come to him. I immediately walk into his embrace, and we stand like that in the middle of the living room, Luca holding our son in one arm, and me in the other. The two parts that make up his world.

  “I love you,” he says with all the tenderness and care in the world as he looks at me.

  “I love you too,” I say. And I mean it. With every fiber of my being, I mean it.

  We don’t have that tender, timid, lovey-dovey kind of love. Our love is a compulsion. A need. A dark and twisted obsession between us that no one can understand but us. I know someone from the outside looking in will think we are crazy, but they aren’t the one married to Luca Pasquino, capo dei capi of the North Mafia. I am.

  Epilogue

  Five Years Later

  Luca

  “Mommy, look what I can do!” I watch as Luciano grabs a soccer ball and punts it hard across the yard.

  Elise and I are sitting in the love seat on the patio. She is snuggled up to me, with her hand in mine.

  After everything has died down, we move once again, but back to the United States. I want us to have a new start, so we move out into the country.

  I watch Elise as she beams at him in pride.

  “That was amazing, baby!” she shouts.

  His face lights up in joy. He lives to please his mother. He loves her with every bone in his body. And that is okay with me. Who won’t love Elise? Luciano loves both of us, but it is obvious whom his favorite is. He looks just like her. I can already tell that when he grows older, he will be a heartbreaker with that face. The only thing he has gotten from me are my eyes.

  Luciano is a sweet boy. With all the love and compassion you can ever ask for in a child. In the past, I would have tried to rid him of that, but after Elise and I have argued about it and she cried, I’ve changed my mind. We will try a new style of training with him.

  He takes off running across the yard to grab the ball with his little hands. Once he takes ahold of it, he sprints toward us. I swear this kid never gets tired. We have to resort to locking our room door on the nights we have sex because he walks in our room at two in the morning complaining about how he isn’t tired, right in the middle of us doing things. I still chuckle at the look of horror on his face because he has thought I have been “attacking” her.

  He is a curious kid that explores the world around him with wonder and confidence.

  After I’ve woken up in that hospital years ago, I have been so scared. I have been scared of how much time has passed and if I’ve missed Elise and Luciano. If I have been out for years or not. I’ve gotten lucky. I’ve gotten so damn lucky. I should have died. The area that man has the bomb, it should have killed me. But the debris that has smashed my body has also protected it.

  Nicolai and Romelo have both been by my side when I have awakened. They have been freaking out because they have no idea where Elise is located. Once I’ve told them, they’ve calmed down and done some watching on her for me. I have been shocked when they’ve brought me back pictures of her with our son. Romelo has actually brought back more than just pictures. He has brought back a DNA test that proves Luciano is mine.

  After that, everything has been touch-and-go. I’ve had to go through rehab and a whole lot of pain. The bruising and cuts have eventually faded except for the scar over my eye. Elise likes to joke about it, saying it proves I am human. I am lucky I’ve worn a thick layer of clothing. If I haven’t, my skin might’ve burned off.

  “Mommy, can I sit next to you? Dad’s had you all day.”

  I am startled out of my thoughts, and Luciano’s pouting face is right in front of me. He gets irritated at the attention I give his mother sometimes, even going as far as to claim that I am “hogging her.”

  Elise slowly peels her hand away from mine and moves down to pick up Luciano, setting him down on her lap. She brushes his thick black locks from his face and gives him a light kiss on the cheek. He looks at me with eyes that can pierce a soul and sticks his tongue out. He then laughs and laughs and laughs. And I can’t help but laugh with him. He is so competitive. Even competing with me for his mother’s affection. That is a trait I can admire.

  Elise begins humming something to him as she rocks slowly with him on her lap. I can’t help the swell of love I can feel blooming in my chest. She is a great mother. Patient, kind, understanding, loving. She is everything my mother has been and more, because when it comes to me, she stands up for what she believes in. My mother has never said a word when it comes to my training. She will turn away and, once my father is out of sight, will make me comfort myself. Once she realizes he isn’t going to be mad at her, she acknowledges my existence. But Elise makes me see other sides of raising Luciano.

  She knows that grooming him is inevitable, but we do come to an agreement about it. Even though she still doesn’t want him trained to be the next heir, she has no choice. And today she is extra loving toward him, because she knows what today is. It is the marker where we up his training, meaning, it will get harder.

  I plan on making him a man by the age of eight. In this world, being “made a man” means killing someone. When you can take a life, you are ready. I know it is harsh, but that is how things are. But we both agree that I will not snuff the emotion out of him. I will not make him into an emotionles
s killing machine. I will not make him like I used to be—like I still am sometimes when I can’t control it. He will be different. He is the exception.

  Elise checks her watch.

  “I should get going. Matteo is coming in town and said we could meet for lunch.” She gives me a sad smile, knowing that once she leaves, we will begin his training once again.

  Out of respect for her, I never train him around her. But if I am too hard on him, I never leave him alone or beat him like my father has done to me. Surprisingly, it makes Luciano work harder and do everything it takes to please me. This method Elise has talked me into is doing better than my father’s method has.

  “I wanna go with you!” Luciano shout. He drops the ball and makes his way to Elise.

  She kneels down in front of him. “Not today, sweetie. Today you’ll be spending time with Daddy.” She smiles at him, running her thumb along his face. He turns his nose up and makes a face.

  “Oh, all right.”

  “Now, give Mommy a kiss.” She smiles at him, and he smiles back, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “I love you.” She smiles.

  “I love you too, Mommy!” he says back. He turns to me with a mischievous grin, whispering to me, which is not much of a whisper at all, “I love you too, Daddy, but don’t tell Mommy. I don’t want her to get jealous.”

  I snicker at his words, pulling Elise in for an embrace. She hugs me back and cranes her neck to look me in the eye, her whole demeanor turning serious.

  “Don’t break him, Luca. I will never forgive you if you do.”

  I nod. She always says that to me. It takes her a while to adjust to Matteo being a part of this life on the regular, and I’ll never forget the hell we have gone through while she has battled her emotions. I don’t want that again. So this time, I will keep my promise. I slowly grab her hand, placing her palm over my heart. She looks mesmerized by the rhythm. She has done that ever since I’ve come back to her that day after being presumed dead.

  “I won’t,” I reassure her.

  She nods and stands on her tiptoes to kiss me. She waves by to both of us, leaving the house.

  It is just me and Luciano now. I take a deep breath.

  “Luciano, I want you to go get your birthday present I gave you, okay?”

  He nods vigorously and takes off into the house. He comes running back outside with a huge grin on his face. I walk down to the range we have, and he follows me, never once faltering. Like I’ve said, this kid has a lot of energy. I take a seat on the edge of the patio, and he comes to stand next to me. We open the box together to reveal his gun. His first gun. I’ve given it to him when he is four and have taught him how to use it. I haven’t put real bullets in it until he has turned five. Across the handle, “Luciano” is inscribed in silver.

  I pick it up, handing it to him, and his whole demeanor changes. He is serious, just like I’ve trained him to be.

  “What does that say?” I motion to his name on his gun.

  “Luciano,” he responds immediately.

  “And who is Luciano?”

  “I am.”

  “And who are you, son?”

  “Luciano Pasquino, firstborn to Luca and Elise Pasquino.”

  “And who will you be?”

  “I will be the next capo in line to the northern portion of the Mafia, the strongest and most powerful crime family in the United States.”

  “And if anyone says otherwise?” I ask.

  He holds the gun up and shoots at the five targets lined across the range, hitting all of them dead center, except for the last one; he has hit it too far to the left, and it spins and falls off the pedestal.

  “Sorry, Dad. I didn’t think about the weight lightening after I fired the first four shots. I’ll be more careful next time.” He smiles at me apologetically.

  Have I mentioned my kid is a fucking genius?

  He takes a seat next to me, letting out a flustered breath.

  “I won’t let you down again, Dad.”

  I look at him in shock and ruffle his hair with a smile on my face. If it were my father, he would have taken the gun and beat me with it for missing my target until the fear of missing has me pissing my pants. But like I’ve promised Elise, I will be different.

  “You could never let me down, mi figlio.”

  He looks at me, and relief floods his face. I stand up, smoothing out my clothing.

  “Come on, we have about four hours until your mom gets back, and you know she’ll be upset if we’re not washed up and cleaned for dinner.”

  His face lights up again, and he jumps up, excited about whatever I am about to throw his way. No matter what I throw at this kid, he is excited to please me and make me happy. He wants to succeed and be the best at everything I put him up to. I can remember when I’ve forced him to face his fears. Elise won’t talk to me for a whole week because I’ve made him face his fears. But he doesn’t even realize he is facing them.

  When he walks in the house with dirt smudged on his face, the first thing he asks me is, “How’d I do?”

  I stand there watching my son. If someone has told me that I will marry a woman and fall in love with her, I will laugh in their face. But I have married her. And I’ve fallen in love with her. I have a child with her, and I will do anything and everything possible for her and for my son. Because they are my life. And I’ll be damned if I let anyone take that away from me.

  The End

  Bonus Chapter

  “Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!”

  I groan in irritation, rolling over, trying to ignore the small body currently jumping up and down on my bed. As soon as I feel the body lift into the air, I reach out, snagging the small legs and yanking them hard. I hear Luciano grunt and begin laughing like crazy.

  Elise rolls over next to me, grinning as well. She hasn’t been feeling well lately, and I can’t figure out why. So I take the day off to take care of her, and in the middle of our trying to sleep in, Luciano and all his energy comes bursting through the door.

  I roll out of bed, dragging him by the leg with me, his body dangling upside down. He is still in a giggling fit as I walk out of the room and into the hallway with him. I flip him right side up, sending him down on the ground, and kneel down to his height.

  “Luciano, you understand your mother is sick, right, figlio? So you can’t be jumping on our bed at seven in the morning,” I say, looking him in the eye.

  He glares back at me, mirroring my eyes. “But it’s snowing, and you promised we could play today,” he whines.

  I look at him in confusion, not at all remembering having that conversation with him. Then I remember last night, I have been preoccupied with Elise while he has kept asking me questions. So I’ve just agreed to whatever he has been yammering about.

  I scrub my hand over my face in irritation. I stand up, walking slowly back to the bedroom.

  “Just give me a minute,” I murmur.

  I hear his little footsteps behind me, and before he can get closer, I slam the bedroom door.

  “Hey!” I hear Luciano’s small voice on the other side of the door.

  I chuckle to myself. He knows the rule. When the door is open, he can come in, and when it is closed, he can’t enter. He has learned his lesson about barging in a long time ago.

  I walk to the bed, where Elise is still lying, crawling over her body.

  I pull her into my arms, her snug body bringing me immediate comfort. She groans a little and rolls over, smiling lazily at me. After all this time, she still takes my breath away every moment I see her. I lean in, kissing her gently on the forehead.

  “Your son is awake and ready to play,” I mumble.

  She chuckles lightly under me and reaches up to push hair out of my face.

  “He’s your son too, you know.”

  I lean in closer to her, inhaling her scent and placing a light kiss on her throat.

  “Yeah, but he gets the enthusiasm from you,” I mumble.

  She lets out a sigh.
“But he gets his stubbornness from you.”

  I chuckle, not caring to finish our little banter. I just want to be inside of her.

  I kiss her softly, running my hands up her stomach inside of her nightgown, and she moans lightly.

  “You said give you a minute! It’s been a minute!” Luciano’s loud knocks sound against the door. “Hello!” he shouts.

  I let out an irritated growl, dropping my head against Elise’s chest. I can feel the vibrations as she laughs. She begins petting my hair softly, making me just want to go back to sleep. Luciano has been absolutely restless these past few weeks; he has way too much energy for a kid his age.

  “Why don’t you go ahead and decorate the house with him?” Elise’s soft voice tickles my ears. “You promised you would, remember?” she adds.

  Apparently, I’ve been making a lot of promises I don’t even recall making.

  I prop myself up on my elbows, looking at her. “Would that make you feel better?” I ask.

  A small smile appears on her face, followed by a blush as she breaks my gaze. She still can’t keep eye contact with me. I eye her thick hair. If it were up to me, I’d cut it. But it isn’t anymore. I’ve been learning to love her like a normal man can. It has been hard—don’t get me wrong. There’s so much that people take an account for others that I never even think twice about. But it makes her happy. And that makes me happy.

  “You can’t hide in there forever!” Luciano’s voice comes through the door again, and Elise laughs.

  I sit up taller. “I better go, before he breaks down the door,” I say. I lean in, giving her a quick kiss on the lips, and head into the closet to find something warm to wear.

  * * * * *

  “I thought we were playing!” Luciano whines from the ground.

  I look down at him. He is bundled up and warm, holding lights in his hands. I am currently in the tree, trying to wrap the lights around the branches. I should have just hired someone to do this, but when Elise bats her eyes at me, I am the first to do whatever she says.

  “Well, your mother wants us to put up the lights. And it makes her happy to see the lights. So that’s what we’re doing,” I say back to him.