by JL Weil
“Some people should thank their lucky stars that everything I wish for does not come true,” he replied coolly.
I rolled my eyes. Good grief.
“Okay, so how do we go about destroying the soul of a higher demon?” Hayden asked, always so loyal and trustworthy. He would walk blindly into a battle because Chase asked.
Chase shook his head. “If you guys had half a brain, you would all walk away now.”
“You always were a showoff,” Travis sneered. Emma and he were smooshed onto the loveseat. She’d been quiet, which worried me. The hunter was indubitably plotting away.
“You’ll be putting yourself and those around you at risk. I can’t be responsible for anyone else getting hurt. Or worse…”
Travis’s gaze narrowed. “Can it be done?”
“Is the sky purple?” he retorted.
“Meaning you have no idea if it’s possible,” Emma finally chimed in. This was right up her alley.
“I have a source,” Chase informed. His body language said, don’t ask questions.
I groaned. Fan-freaking-tastic. More dealings with Kira. If he struck any more contracts with this particular demon, he was going to end up being indebted to her in this life and beyond.
I wasn’t the only one suspicious. Lexi was onto him, and she was not in the least put off by his stubborn tone. “What kind of source?”
“Let me worry about the details,” he said irritated. “And in the meantime, we send as many of those assholes as we can back down to roast in Hell.”
Emma cleared her throat. “Speak for yourself, half-breed,” she hissed. “I’ve had enough of demons.”
I think everyone in the room got whiplash, heads turned so fast in her direction. “Giving up the family biz?” Chase scratched his head, looking doubtful.
Emma glanced to Travis briefly. “Let’s worry about keeping Earth from burning and extinguish these bastards. I can’t retire if we’re all dead.”
She had a point. “I don’t expect any of you to stand by my side. I can’t promise that you’ll come out of this unscarred…or at all.”
The room lapsed in silence, the severity of our situation settling over us. This wasn’t about us anymore; it could very well affect the world. No pressure.
Chase played with my hair, twirling the strands around his fingers as they worked out patrol details around town. The demons I had let loose before being caged were our immediate problem. Hell was coming with backup.
I cast my attention to the wheat fields outside, the room of people fading into the background. My nerves felt shot, and there was a buzz humming between my ears. What I wouldn’t give for five minutes of blissful silence.
“You ready to go?” Chased asked in what felt like only minutes later.
I blinked. Oh crap. I’d forgotten all about returning our “borrowed” car.
The room had pretty much cleared out; only Lexi lingered behind. I smiled. It was all I could do, because inside I was a mess, and I didn’t want Chase to know. Keeping those feelings from him required effort, and I wasn’t sure how long I would be able to hold out.
I was stronger than I used to be; yet I still didn’t know exactly what I was doing. There was untapped potential and power inside me. I felt it simmering and swirling under the surface, ready to break free, but had no idea how. And that scared me almost as much as losing myself again to the darkness.
Chase was already burdened with worry and had done so much for me. This was something I would find a way to handle on my own. Looking up, I met his eyes. “Let’s ride.”
Leaning down, he whispered a ludicrous response in my ear.
I whacked him on the arm, smiling faintly. “You’re still a dickwad.”
Unfolding his legs, he stood. “And that makes you happy?”
I hopped to my feet, eager to get some fresh country air. “Yeah, it does.”
He gave me a wicked grin. “It’s nice to know I still have no clue how your mind works.”
The feeling was mutual. You’d think being able to sense each other’s emotions would have made it easier. Not the case. Sometimes I wondered if it made it more complicated. “Ditto.”
Part 2
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.
—Lao Tzu
Chapter 15
{Angel}
The sun had gone down and with it a cold slapped over the air, punching from the northeast. A storm was coming, the kind that made you want to stay inside, curl up, and sip a hot drink. Sitting by the window in my room, I wrapped my hands around a mug of tea. Patter. Ping. Pang. The rain pelted against the glass. I watched it curtain the view and waited for the next round of lightning to ignite the gloomy sky.
Two days had gone by.
And this was the first time I was alone for more than five minutes. I needed it.
Often I found myself staring into space for no good reason, and I wasn’t the only one who noticed. They all worried, waiting to see if the darkness might rear its ugly head. And who could blame them?
I clasped my arms around myself as if I could protect myself from such a terrible invasion. The darker Angel had been strong enough to manifest outside of me. What Chase had done wasn’t a permanent solution. At least that was my assumption. I finally admitted to myself what I hadn’t wanted to believe. My soul wasn’t wiped clean. There were still tendrils of blackness entwining around my soul. I could feel them—faint, but they were there all the same.
It was the moments I caught myself lost to time and space that I realized I needed to find a way to overpower the darkness. Never again would I let it control me. Chase, Lexi, and Travis all found ways to control their demons. I would too.
Flattening my hand against the window, I felt the rain pepper the glass. My eyes peered next door at the Winters’ house. I didn’t have the heart to tell Chase and burden him with another problem. Between Alastair and Kira, he had more than his fair share of stress.
But Lexi…
She was strong—her control profound. If anyone could teach me, it was Lexi. Secrets weren’t secrets for long if Lexi knew, but this time, she was going to have to keep her trap sealed or I would compel her. I hated sneaking around and lying, mostly because I plain sucked ass at it, but also because it wasn’t something I wanted to come between my relationships with the people I cared about. Lies turned into more lies, until you found yourself trapped in a web created by your own deception. Lies hurt. They destroyed.
But a voice in my head told me this one little white lie was to ultimately protect those I loved. And it wasn’t as if I would never tell him. I would—after the demon storm passed and I was able to handle the darkness.
I laid my cheek against the cool glass and closed my eyes. The world faded—
—Chase was in my room, standing in front of me with eyes smoldering gold. A familiar tingle of panic twisted in my gut. Demons. They weren’t just nearby; they were here. In my room.
“How did they get here?” I gasped.
“Demons aren’t bound by physical laws, but unworldly,” Chase said, keeping his gaze glued on the three demons that moseyed out from the shadows. “They come and go in our realm as they please. Our marks allow us to do the same. Their biggest problem is staying here, which is why they seek us out first. Our life source allows them to stay here longer than a human’s would.”
I understood what he was trying to tell me. I could move like them, fight like them, because physical laws no longer bound me. Change. My limbs trembled lightly at first, then more noticeably.
Four more demons hissed from behind the others, fourteen scarlet eyes radiating through the room spotlighted on Chase and me. Holy freaking Christmas cake.
Confusion gave way to terrifying panic. I hadn’t expected my first face time with demons since my separation from Hell to be in my bedroom. It felt like an invasion of my privacy, and I didn’t like it.
However much it irked me, it was becoming c
lear I needed to zip up my big girl pants and fight. Chase couldn’t save us alone, but how much help could I be if I could barely stay upright? I don’t know what it was, but the sight of demons in all their hideous glory, drooling on my carpet and filling the room with their rancid stench, made me woozy.
I checked myself, chin jutting in the air.
Sparing me a quick glance from the corner of his eyes, he asked, “You good?”
I nodded, at a loss for words. Control. I needed to be in control right now, and caving to the fear and self-doubt wasn’t going to help me.
Chase rushed headlong into battle like a bowling ball striking the pins. Demons hit the ground. He twisted around but wasn’t quite quick enough—out of character for Chase. And my nightmare began. The demon brought his arm around Chase’s neck, placing him in a brutal chokehold.
Hisss time hasss come to an end, a ragged voice whispered. I couldn’t tell which one spoke, as none of their mouths moved.
Steeling myself, I whipped at him, snarling. “Let him go, you asshole.”
Chase bent down, using the momentum to send the demon behind him sailing through the air. Crash. The mirror above my dresser shattered to a gazillion pieces, glass spraying over the room. His gaze narrowed as he straightened, deflecting another bone-jarring punch, but it didn’t matter how many blows he dodged. They were swarming around him like stink on shit.
I ground my teeth and forced myself into action. “I can do this. I can do this.” I spun, whirling a kick in the air straight at what I thought was a stomach. Smack!
God that felt amazing. I wanted to do it again. And again.
“Angel, watch out—”
I didn’t even register the impact until I was on my back and my pain scale went from zero to ten in seconds. The demon who had slammed his foot into my chest hovered over me, grinning like a sadistic prick. To think, I had once upon a time been able to command these creatures. It would have been a pretty darn handy skill to have right about now.
Pushing up on my arms, I scooted my butt across the floor until I bumped into my bed.
Must kill. Must have. Must die.
Power. Taste good.
Mine, all mine.
I feared the voices were in my head. They stacked one on top of the other, loud and persistent. This couldn’t possibly be the end. Chase and I had fought too hard, been through too much to die like this, but the demons stalked, closing in around me with their thoughts echoing in my head.
I wanted to crawl under the bed and cover my ears.
Breaking free, Chase managed to circle around and help me to my feet. If there had been time, I would have given him props for such quick maneuvering. We stood shoulder to shoulder as our uninvited guests closed in, nothing but my full-sized bed between us.
“Got any brilliant ideas?” he asked.
“I thought that was your job.”
“Yeah well, you won’t like what I have in mind.” His eyes shifted to the window on our left.
“Probably not,” I stated flatly. Knowing the way his mind worked, we were about thirty seconds away from crashing through that window and dropping two stories to the ground. I wasn’t too keen about having my brains splattered over my yard.
I blinked. If I didn’t do something quick, I was going to be picking glass out of my hair for weeks. Squaring my shoulders, there was this sudden crackling under my skin, traveling down my forearm. Shock held me immobile as I stared down at my arms. Chase’s fingers spread over my hip, and as soon as he touched me, a bolt of static radiated between us.
He snatched his hand back, scowling. “What the hell?”
A white-hot blast of light shot from my hands, the force shoving me backward. An explosion rippled through the air, shaking the floorboards under my feet. Shit, it shook the whole house. I hit the ground, my ears ringing and fingertips burning. Plaster fell from the ceiling, chunks showering the room. I thought the ceiling was going to come crashing down. Demon arms flew one way and legs the other until they burst into ash, raining over me.
Pain ruptured and rushed down my arms, confusion swirling as I clutched my arms over my face to shield myself from not only the blinding light, but also the debris.
When the light finally fizzled out and the dust settled, I started to crawl on my hands, calling out Chase’s name. He never answered. And he never would.
Shaking my head incisively, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. His body lay at an awkward angle at the foot of the bed. Blood pooled around his face, flowing freely from his mouth. His eyes were open, a soft gray, but they lacked the life I loved. The life I couldn’t live without. Chase was my rock. Without him, I was lost in the world. I screamed. Again. And Again. His name tearing from the depths of my soul—
Gasping, I jolted upright. Panic cloaked me as my wild eyes scanned the surroundings, Chase’s name lodged in my throat. I didn’t remember how I’d gotten here. Or where here was…
I was in my bedroom, tucked into a ball still sitting in front of the window. The sun was in the process of rising, peeking through the ends of the blinds. My eyes darted from corner to corner, covering every nook, my heart pounding ferociously. There were no red eyes in the shadows. No lifeless Chase sprawled on my floor. No blood. But my fingers were tingling and the ends of my nightshirt were singed. “What the hell?” I muttered.
Cold tremors rocked through me as I lifted my cheek off the damp window. How had I gotten here? The last thing I remembered was fighting, the voices, and Chase… Oh God. He had been… I couldn’t even form the thought.
My heartbeat sped, my lungs constricting. He was nowhere in sight, and I didn’t know if I should be relieved or losing my mind. Scrambling off the window seat, I went to grab my phone. Two frantic steps and familiar sensations pricked at me. Something soft tickled my hair.
“Chase,” I whispered, gazing into his silver eyes.
They twinkled like starlight. “Angel.”
Even though I was trying to push down the emotions, some of them eked through. In. I inhaled. Out. I exhaled. In. Out. I repeated over and over until I was sure I was breathing again. “You’re alive.”
“What did I miss?”
Nothing. Everything. A sudden burst of happiness gathered inside me. I threw my arms around his neck, burying my face into the front of his shirt. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
His hands combed gently down the length of my hair. “Where else would I be?”
“Dead,” I mumbled, shuddering.
“I thought we had this discussion. I’m not easy to kill.”
Very true, but he also hadn’t had a nightmare so real it was hard to believe it hadn’t happened. The demons. The explosion. And Chase. Christ, Mary Mother, and Joseph.
It was my fault. The blast of light had been what caused him to stop breathing. I had killed Chase. Me.
He placed two fingers under my chin and tilted my face back. “What’s going on, Angel Eyes? You woke up screaming my name.”
“Is that such a bad thing?” I asked, using a pathetic attempt at humor to diffuse the very real fear still throbbing inside me.
“It wouldn’t be if you didn’t sound like you were being murdered.”
“Thanks for putting that vivid image in my head. It was just a dream.” Just a dream, I echoed in my head. Not real. Then I scoffed. “Scratch that. It was a nightmare.” Dreams made me think about sugarplums and dancing fairies. What I experienced was nothing short of horrifying.
“Want to talk about it?” he asked, his breath warm against my temple.
I picked at the sheets, avoiding his eyes. “I don’t want to talk at all.” Even as the words left my mouth, I knew he wasn’t going to like it. It was a total cop-out. I knew it. He knew it. But if I started to talk about the dream, I dreaded it would all unravel. All of it. The darkness. The captivity. The helplessness. The urges. And then there was the depth of my love for him. It scared me sometimes to love someone as deeply as I loved Chase.
“You’ve been sa
ying that a lot lately. Eventually, that excuse won’t be enough. You’re going to have to tell me what’s going on.”
“Eventually,” I murmured, staring at his lips. Without thinking, I leaned over and pressed my mouth tightly against his. There was only one thing that would surely make me forget the nightmare, my fears, everything. And it started with Chase’s lips.
He was surprised, but quickly gave in. Wrapping me in his arms, he smelled insanely good, and his lips burned hot against mine, working ferociously.
“You’re overdressed,” I said as my fingers pushed at the ends of his shirt, impatient with the need to feel him. Seeing him dead, even in a dream, made me want to feel him alive. And Chase never felt more alive than when he was kissing me.
Warmth leapt into his face, softening the lines around his amber eyes. “The wanting you. Does it ever stop?”
Heat spiked, radiating in my eyes. “I hope not.” There was a cord between our hearts, binding us together, and I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Dappled morning sunlight brightened the room as Chase ran his hands up and down my arms in a way that managed to arouse and soothe at the same time. He leaned down and kissed the curve of my mouth. His arms came around me and wrapped me in a long, deep kiss. “Satisfied?” he whispered.
“Hardly.” I drew him down again, lingering over the sinful taste of him and leaned into his sumptuous kiss. I needed much, much more. “This might take a while.”
“We’ve got forever.”
I hoped so.
{Chase}
With one lingering glance over my shoulder, I slipped out of her room, carefully closing the door behind me. Angel had finally fallen back to sleep. I couldn’t help but worry. I’d give her another day or two tops. My patience was running thin. She was struggling, and it was my natural instinct to want to help, ease the conflict she was feeling. I didn’t need a shrink to tell me Angel had problems.
Who didn’t?