Her mouth broke out into an unstoppable smile.
"What has you so happy?" asked Rebecca shrewdly.
"Nothing. Just—just looking forward to our ride," answered Caroline, knowing that nobody believed her but not really caring either.
Tom did not come to breakfast, and Caroline had lingered long enough. Rebecca invited her to go to the nursery with her and the dowager; they were going to spend the morning with Henry.
But Caroline was too excited and nervous to spend time with anyone other than Tom at the moment.
She thanked them but said that she would rather walk in the gardens.
Making her way outside, she kept an eye out for Tom but he was nowhere to be seen. Supressing her disappointment, she struck out across the formal lawns to the meadow beyond. A nice, long walk to help straighten her thoughts would be just the thing.
Charles staggered down to breakfast later than most, he was sure. His head was pounding as a result of last night's excesses. Still, he had no bullet holes in him and the Nobles had left for London and their boat back to America at first light. So all in all, a successful night.
He was looking forward to a hearty breakfast and was daydreaming about hot, strong coffee when he was suddenly accosted in the hallway.
"Carrington."
Charles yelped as a hand touched his shoulder.
"What in the damned hell are you doing?" he roared at Hadley, who it turned out belonged to the hand.
"Forgive me, I—I did not mean to startle you. I have a, um, pressing matter that I would speak with you about."
"Right, well. Can it wait until after breakfast?" asked Charles, not knowing or particularly caring what Hadley could possibly want to discuss with him.
"Well, no. Not really. That is to say, I would prefer it to be now."
Charles made no real effort to bite back the curse of annoyance, but he relented nonetheless.
"Will it take long?" he asked as he preceded Hadley to Tom's library.
"No, I shouldn't think so," said Hadley smugly.
What the hell was this about?
Upon entering the room, Charles turned toward Hadley and folded his arms, waiting for the other man to speak up.
Hadley suddenly seemed nervous. And was he sweating?
"Your sister is, I mean I wanted to—I would—"
"Oh spit it out, man," Charles interrupted Hadley's bumbling.
"Right. Yes. Yes, right. I will."
Charles merely raised a brow and waited.
"My lord," Hadley, if possible, sounded even more pompous than usual, "you are aware, I am sure, of my excellent lineage and connections."
Charles wasn't but thought it best not to interrupt.
"And I know that an esteemed family such as your own would appreciate an alliance with another esteemed family."
Charles knew that such things were rather important to his father, though he himself couldn't give two hoots. So he nodded, wishing the smaller man would get on with it.
"The thing is, my lord. I wanted to speak to you about Lady Caroline…"
Tom finally made it down the stairs having spent the morning rummaging through things that he hadn't even looked at in years.
His mother had died when he was a child and his father had never been very forthcoming with information about her.
Aunt Catherine had told him stories of his mother — a soft, gentle woman, beautiful and kind. Aunt Catherine left out the part about her being mercilessly bullied by his tyrannical father, but Tom had read between the lines.
He didn't miss her, since he did not really remember her. But he missed having a mother he supposed, though Aunt Catherine had always loved him like a son.
Before his death, Tom's father had given him a box of things belonging to his mother. Nothing of great importance — letters, some drawings, some jewellery. But one thing in particular had been very important. Her ring.
A ring that had belonged to Tom's grandmother and which would have been passed down to a daughter, had there ever been one. But since there'd only been Tom, he got it.
It was beautiful — a delicate band of gold, which held a brilliant sapphire surrounded by tiny diamonds.
Tom had not seen it in two years. Not since the last time he'd held it on his way to speak to Caroline. Much like now.
Now, though, he was sure that it would be on her finger soon.
He could not stop the happy grin that spread out on his face.
It would look beautiful on her delicate hand. And then finally everyone would know, she was his.
He was on his way to the breakfast room, hoping that he wouldn't be too late to meet her when he was interrupted by the sudden appearance of a pleased looking Hadley and a bored looking Charles coming from the library.
Hadley bid him a quick 'good morning' before hurrying off mumbling something about his sister.
Tom turned to look enquiringly at Charles.
"What was that about?" he asked Charles, "because I know even you would not have seduced Theodora Hadley."
"Good God, no," answered Charles with a dramatic shudder. "No, believe it or not, Caroline has just caught herself a husband."
Tom felt the blood leave his face, felt the colour drain.
"What do you mean?" he asked, as calmly as he could.
"Hadley's just asked for her hand, hasn't he?"
"But have you spoken to Caroline?"
"Well, no. But Hadley seemed quite sure that she would say yes, so I can only assume he's spoken to her about it. And he did say they talked this morning and that she had consented to spend the afternoon with him so…" he trailed off with a casual shrug, not realising that he was making Tom angrier by the second.
"He told you that?" he ground out now, clenching his jaw against the torturous pain of Charles' casual words.
"Yes, seemed very well pleased with himself. I admit I don't particularly like the man. But he will be an earl someday and you know Caro, she's always wanted to marry well."
"I had thought that was less important to her nowadays."
"Well, to tell the truth I do not know if it is or not. Maybe, when faced with the prospect of being a countess it was just too good an opportunity to pass up."
His words were like a blow to Tom's heart. How? How could he have gotten it so wrong again?
She had been given the opportunity of a title and had once again sacrificed him, and her own happiness, for the sake of it.
He had believed her when she had said she loved him. He still believed her. But then, he had believed her back then. It just hadn't been enough. And it seemed as though it still wasn't.
The sun was higher in the sky now and its heat was beating down upon Caroline as she meandered through the gardens. She had spent much longer than she had intended in the meadow, sitting by the river and daydreaming happily about the life she and Tom would have here.
She imagined the family coming to spend holidays, imagined Henry growing up and running around the halls, hopefully with a cousin or two trailing behind him. Perhaps even, if a miracle occurred, Charles would settle down and bring a wife to stay.
It would be blissful and the sooner she saw Tom, the sooner they could make plans.
Caroline was unsure as to how her parents would react. She thought her mother would be well pleased, and her father too, if a little disappointed that she wouldn't have a title.
But a title meant nothing to her and she could not understand why she had ever thought it had.
When she arrived back to the house and glanced at the long case clock in the hallway, Caroline was shocked to see how late it was. She had been gone for hours. It was past noon already. Dashing upstairs to change into her habit, for she was quite sure that everyone else would be ready to leave after a light meal, she changed once again in record time and was headed downstairs in a matter of minutes, dressed now in her grey habit.
Caroline hurried toward the drawing room, hoping to find Tom at last and make sure he knew to accompany t
hem on their ride this afternoon. She had no intention of going without him.
Upon entering the drawing room however, she was greeted by Theodora, Miss Darthshire, Hadley, who was looking at Caroline far too lasciviously for her taste, and a very confused looking Rebecca. But no Tom, she noted to her disappointment.
"Caro," Rebecca stood as soon as Caroline entered the room. "I must speak with you immediately."
Caroline frowned at Rebecca's tone. She sounded distressed and Caroline felt a prickling of fear.
"Of course, Becca."
They turned to leave the room but Hadley stood and addressed them.
"If you please, my ladies, I—ah—I had hoped to speak to Lady Caroline myself on a matter of some urgency."
Caroline felt her jaw drop in surprise at his words.
She could be in no doubt as to what he was angling for, neither could anyone else for that matter. Theodora looked positively ecstatic and Rebecca even more distressed than before.
Caroline darted a startled glance at Rebecca.
"I'm afraid this is rather more pressing, Lord Hadley," said Rebecca in a tone that brooked no argument. Then without another word, marched Caroline from the room.
Caroline was in such a state of shock about Hadley's suspected intentions that she did not even realise where Rebecca was taking them until they stepped into Tom's study.
Caroline looked around in surprise.
"Becca, I am sure we should not be here. If Tom—"
"Tom's not here, Caroline."
Edward's voice sounded from behind Tom's desk, his face drawn and worried.
Charles stood by the window with much the same expression and, Caroline noticed with a stab of fear, the dowager was sitting on the chaise, sniffling and holding a handkerchief to her face.
"What do you mean he's not here?" she asked now, her voice shaking, "Where is he?"
"Halfway to London, I would imagine, based on the speed he tore out of here," said Edward with, strangely, a dark look at Charles.
Charles noticed it too for he glowered right back.
What on earth was going on here?
"London? Why? Why would he go to London and why would he leave without saying goodbye? Has something happened? Does he have urgent business there?"
She looked to Rebecca who was looking more distressed by the second.
Caroline laughed to ease the strange tension in the room. She felt sick with fear but did not know why.
"This is a strange morning indeed," she said struggling to keep her tone light, "Why I fear I've almost been proposed to one minute and the next I'm being dragged in here and told that Tom has gone off for the day."
"Not for the day," said Edward and his gentle tone scared her even more. "He's gone to catch the boat that is leaving for the Americas."
Caroline felt the room tilt alarmingly as Edward's words sank in.
"What? No. No, that can't be. He and I—we, we talked last night and he was going to—I mean, he did not say the words exactly but we were going to…" she trailed off in the face of her family's sympathetic looks.
This could not be happening. It simply couldn't. Last night they'd said, well, they hadn't said they loved each other but surely they would have? He would have?
Suddenly feeling weary, she moved to sit in the chair opposite Edward.
"Why?" she asked in a whisper, no longer trusting her voice to stay strong.
"Because, well because he said he could not be made a fool of twice. I did not know what he was talking about, I only came upon him when he was saddling Brutus."
"Wait, he only took Brutus? Then surely he cannot mean to go, without packing? Without sorting out his affairs?"
"He still owns his house in America, Caroline," Edward explained gently, "and he has left hasty instructions for the estate steward. It does not seem as though he intends to come back soon. His valet is to follow with his trunks."
Caroline stood again, too agitated to just sit and hear this.
How could he have left her? Was it revenge? Did he truly hate her for her rejection two years ago? Was this a punishment?
"I do not understand," she said now, her voice thick with tears.
"It's my fault, Caro." Charles came forward and stood in front of her, looking guilty and miserable. "Hadley came to me this morning to ask me for your hand."
"You did not say yes, Charles?" she asked horrified.
Charles looked sheepish.
"Er, I may have done. But I did not know that you and Tom were—well, Edward explained after he threatened to shoot me. That happens a lot around here," he said.
"Charles," both Rebecca and Caroline shouted at him to get his mind back to where it needed to be.
"Yes, well, anyway. He asked. I said he had permission to ask you. But you know I would not have insisted you marry that snivelling little—"
"Charles!"
"Alright, alright. Well, he asked. I said yes. Then I happened upon Tom and mentioned it casually. Next thing I know, he's racing off to London and all the females are crying and Edward looks fit to kill me."
"That's because you're an idiot," blasted Rebecca.
"And how was I to know? Nobody tells me anything," came the heated retort.
"Perhaps we would, if you were sober long enough."
"For God's sake, Rebecca," Charles yelled.
"Watch yourself," Edward interrupted quietly, but there was steel in his tone.
Caroline was in a state of complete, shocked devastation.
Letting their bickering wash over her, she stared out into the beautiful summer's day. The sun that had seemed so pleasant now seemed too bright. The birdsong that had sounded so wonderful before now seemed to mock her in its happiness. She would never feel happiness again.
Unless…
"How far is London from here?" she asked of nobody in particular.
"About three or four hours riding. More in a coach. Why?" asked Charles suspiciously.
Caroline did not want to tell them about the plan that was forming in her head. They would surely try to stop her.
So she shrugged slightly and said, in her most desolate voice, "I just wondered if I had come back sooner, would I have seen him before he went."
As she had hoped, she got the information she was after.
"He left about an hour ago, Caro. And in such a towering rage that I do not think anything would have stopped him."
Caroline nodded her head to show that she was listening, but her brain was whirring furiously.
Was she going to let history repeat itself? Stand idly by while the man she loved walked out of her life?
She turned to Edward, her eyes serious, her tone firm.
"Does he think that I wanted to marry Lord Hadley?"
Edward stared right back, as if trying to figure out what was going on in her mind.
"He was barely coherent, but yes. That's the gist of it. I tried to stop him of course but—"
"Never mind," she interrupted quickly, not wanting to waste any more time talking.
Then she swung round to Charles.
"Charles, I—I am worried that Lord Hadley will think, I mean I would rather he did not have the opportunity to ask me for my hand. I do not want to be alone with him."
She wasn't afraid of Lord Hadley, since he was more irritating than dangerous, but he would like to keep Charles and Hadley out of her way for a while.
"Don't worry, Caro," said Charles at once, obviously keen to make up for his colossal mistake. "I will speak to him. He won't be asking you anything."
Caroline smiled her thanks.
Rebecca came forward then and caught her arm.
"Are you well?" she asked with no little concern.
"No," Caroline answered truthfully, "but I will be."
She turned to leave the room and Rebecca stopped her at once.
"Where are you going?"
"I just want some time alone." Then, because she wasn't sure that Rebecca would leave her, she leaned fo
rward and whispered, "Do take care of the dowager, Becca. She seems most distraught."
Rebecca glanced back at the older woman.
"Yes, she had hoped—" She stopped on seeing Caroline's stricken expression. "Yes, well. Never mind. I shall look after her."
Caroline nodded then without another word, walked silently from the room.
"Should I go after her?" she heard Rebecca ask worriedly.
"Perhaps, sweetheart, we should leave her be."
Caroline silently thanked Edward and made her way swiftly to her room. There was no time to lose.
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
SNEAKING OUT OF the house was harder than Caroline had thought. She was surprised, upon reaching her bedchamber, to find Sally there.
"Sally, are you alright?" she asked immediately. Her abigail was never here during the day, at least not that Caroline knew of.
"Oh, yes my lady. I just, I heard the news about Mr. Crawdon having left and I, well I wanted to make sure that you were well."
Caroline smiled gratefully at her friend of many years. But she really could do without her being here at this particular time.
"Actually, now that you say it I think I feel a bit of a headache coming upon me. Perhaps a lavender soaked cloth and some tea?"
Sally jumped up looking relieved at having something to do to help and rushed from the room.
As soon as she was gone, Caroline took some money and stuffed it in a reticule then snatched up the hat matching her habit and sneaked from the room.
She knew that Sally would not take long. She also knew that Rebecca would not leave her all afternoon so she was unsure as to how much time was available to her.
Tiptoeing down the stairs, she slipped past the main rooms and out into the blessedly empty conservatory, then round the house and to the stables without having been detected.
Once there, she called out to Jimmy, the stable lad whom she had gotten to know over the last couple of weeks.
"Ah, Jimmy. Be a dear and saddle up Fortuna will you?"
Jimmy looked undecided and Caroline felt her stomach drop. Please, do not let my plan be foiled now.
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