by Archer, Kiki
Karl threw his hands over his ears. “Alright, alright.”
“No. Life’s simple. This new venture in Manchester is simple, and you’re the perfect man for the job. You know it and I know it.” She picked up her bag and tucked it neatly into her shoulder. “If you don’t want Connie, you tell Connie.”
“And I’d get you?”
“Oh Karl, you are drunk.” She moved the chair back into its original position in the corner of the precisely decorated office. “You’d never get me. And can we clarify one final time that you never really had me. I’m your friend, your business partner of ten years, and now apparently I’m your confidante.” She paused. “Your date night the other night, did you do what I said? Did you take flowers? Did you shower her with fine wine and affection?”
“No, we went to the Flag and Lamb and it sucked.”
“If you don’t listen to me then you need to stop asking me.” She checked her watch. “I really need to go.”
“Fancy man waiting up for you is he?”
“No. I work hard. I get home late. I like to relax.”
“I could come? We could relax together?”
Louise walked round to the other side of the desk and crouched, connecting with Karl’s tired eyes. “You’ve had your sulk. Go home, say sorry, and suck up that so called shitty life that most people actually dream of.”
“It wouldn’t be shitty if I had it with you.”
“I told you. Never. Going. To. Happen.”
Chapter Ten
“Thank you so much for inviting me; this place is amazing!” Maria gazed in disbelief at the brightly decorated warehouse jam-packed full of inflatables. “I didn’t know places like this existed. I’ve been to all the regular play centres with slides and tumble gyms and things, but never anything like this. It’s incredible.”
Connie pointed to the back of the Bounce-a-rama building. “That whole area is one big inflated pillow. Noah loves that best. Then over there to the left are the three standard bouncy castles.”
“They’re hardly standard; look at them!”
Connie laughed. “You seem excited.”
“One’s a pirate ship, one’s a Barbie castle and the other’s a train. Who wouldn’t be excited?”
Connie smiled, finding Maria’s enthusiasm contagious. “It gets better. On the right over there by the café are the castles with slides, and behind us there’s a tunnel maze which is actually pretty dark.” She dropped her bag onto the table. “We get to sit in the middle here so we can see exactly where they are and what they’re up to.”
“Great layout, but I’m not sitting down.”
Connie looked the slim woman up and down. “You’re hardly dressed to go crazy.”
“You only messaged me an hour ago. I was on my way out.”
“To the opera?”
Maria lifted her hands to her white jeans, white shirt and blue blazer. “I’m never taking you to the opera if you’d wear something like this. I was off to a meeting.”
“At Mariano’s?”
She removed her jacket and threw it onto the table. “They’ve survived for the past three years without me. Missing one meeting won’t make any difference.” Holding onto the back of the chair she kicked off her heels. “I can’t believe how quiet it is here.”
Connie looked over to the inflated pillow where Noah and Alice were already bouncing around. “The mornings are reserved for children aged one to three. Then at twelve the four and five year olds can come in. Then after school it’s a free for all. I brought Noah once and the big kids were far too rough for him. There won’t be more than five mums here this morning.”
“Really? And we can bounce?”
“As long as it looks like you’re helping your child.”
“She doesn’t need help. I’m off. That slide’s got my name on it.”
Connie laughed. “Maria!”
“What? Come on. No one’s checking.”
“Don’t you want a coffee first?”
“No! Be there or be square.”
Connie watched as the naturally poised woman dressed all in white with silky dark hair threw herself up the steps to the bouncy slide. She glanced back at Noah and Alice who were perfectly happy jumping together and rolling around. “Oh what the hell,” she said, giggling and crouching to untie her laces.
****
“So, how did it go?” asked Louise.
Karl looked up and saw the tits and teeth peering around his large office door. “How did what go?”
His fresh-faced business partner stepped into the room sporting a pin-striped trouser suit and a higher than usual, but still perfectly straight, ponytail. “Oh, Karl! You’ve got the same shirt on as yesterday. You didn’t go home, did you?”
“I did,” he lied, rubbing his face and pulling himself further under his desk.
“No you didn’t. You’ve got stubble. You never have stubble.”
“I fancied a change.”
Louise moved to the corner of the room and looked into the bin. “Our takeaway’s still in here. The cleaners haven’t been in. They probably saw you snoring away and left you to it.”
“I’ve got work to do.”
“You’ve got a hangover.”
Karl adjusted his laptop screen and ran his finger over the mouse pad. “Seriously Louise, you need to leave me alone.”
“Hey macho man, that’s not how it works. You can’t ask me to spend my life with you one minute then palm me off the next.”
“I did not—”
“Yes you did. Maybe not in so many words, but that’s what you alluded to. And you didn’t even confirm your decision on the Manchester office. On the phone you said you wanted what I wanted, and we both know that I want you there.”
“Can we not rehash my drunken ramblings, and I don’t know what I want.”
Louise reached for the high-backed chair and parked it in front of his desk. “Why didn’t you go home?”
“Seriously, don’t sit down. I haven’t got time for this.”
She sat down and crossed her legs, twitching her elevated foot up and down, flashing the red underside of her Louboutin heels. “Yes you have. Tell me what’s happening.” She glanced at the wall clock before focusing back on the task in hand. “Tell me.”
“I need to finish the Richardson claim.”
“What? You haven’t finished the Richardson claim?” The long dark ponytail swayed from side to side as she shook her head. “That was due Monday!”
“I know, so please, if you’ll leave me to it?”
“I’ll finish the Richardson claim for you. You take yourself home, freshen up, apologise to Connie and get back in time for the Manchester investors’ meeting at four.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“She won’t be home. She takes Noah to Bounce-a-rama on Thursdays.”
“And your pride doesn’t want you to show up all grovelly in front of her friends?”
“She goes on her own.”
“So go! Take flowers. Tell her you’re sorry. Sort yourself out and get back here looking the part.”
Karl scratched his stubble and checked the clock. “You don’t mind?”
“You’re useless when you’re like this. I manage you like I manage all our company’s employees. I know how to bring out the best in you and this is for the best. You need to get yourself sorted.” She nodded. “And anyway, we’re partners; it’s what partners do.”
Karl smiled. “You’d make a good—”
“Change. The. God. Damn. Record.”
****
“Be there or be square? Who actually says that anymore?” Connie was sitting next to Maria at the top of the tallest inflatable slide that looked out across the echoing expanse of the brightly coloured warehouse.
Maria brushed dust off her white trousers and smiled. “I do. I also say you shouldn’t miss moments. Life’s short. People spend too long waiting for that special day, that special person, that speci
al moment. Waiting for a time when they think everything will finally fit into place. Life’s not perfect and that time might never come, so you make your own happiness, you fulfil your own dreams. You enjoy every day for what it is: unique, special and only lived once.”
“Oh, I thought you’d want to come back again next Thursday?”
Maria laughed loudly. “Yes I do, and I’d like many more moments like this.” She grabbed hold of Connie’s hand and flung herself off the slope, pulling Connie down with her.
Connie wailed as she sped after the woman, coming to a rather awkward stop at the bottom of the slide with her face somehow plunged into Maria’s ample chest. She pulled back quickly. “I’m so sorry.”
“I’m not, I’m a lesbian, it’s fine.”
“Oh, I…” Connie jumped up and dusted herself off.
“I’m teasing you. I love having a woman’s face in my cleavage. Now help me up, would you?”
“Sorry, I couldn’t stop myself.”
“That’s what they all say.”
Connie flared with colour. “Sorry, I…”
“Come on, I’m older than you, I need a hand.”
“Right, sorry.” She took hold of the soft fingers and pulled.
Maria rose from the floor but prolonged the contact, holding onto the hand and smiling at Connie. “Thank you. I’m sorry. I’ll stop with the teasing. Let me get you that coffee.”
“No, it’s fine. You’re funny. It’s… I can just get awkward sometimes, that’s all.” She paused, aware that her rambling wasn’t needed. “A mocha would be great.” She watched as Maria walked to their table for her purse. Her white jeans and white shirt were now scuffed with dirt, and her silky brown hair was slightly more wayward, but still she looked preened and perfected, like an Arabian princess at an evening soirée. Connie snapped herself out of it and turned towards the inflated pillow. Noah and Alice were now chasing a new boy around. She walked their way and watched them for a while before gaining their attention.
“Are we ready for snack time yet, guys?”
Noah shook his head. “Noah and Liss chase Doo-Doo.”
“Doo-Doo?”
“Yes, Doo-Doo.” Noah pointed at the new boy and bounced after him.
“Alice, would you like some snacks?”
“No, I chase Doo-Doo.”
Connie smiled and waved at the new little boy who seemed to be enjoying himself too. “Hello, I’m Noah’s mummy; what’s your name?”
The little boy giggled his way past his two new friends. “Doo-Doo.”
Connie laughed. “Okay then. You guys come over when you’re ready for a snack. We’re just sitting in the middle. Can you see where?” All three children ignored her and continued their game so she spoke to herself. “Yes, Mummy. Thank you, Mummy. See you soon, Mummy.”
“No one’s listening to you.” Maria handed over the steaming mug of coffee and waved at her daughter. “Alice, are you okay?”
“Yes, Mama. Go away, please.”
“Right.” Maria nodded. “That’s both of us told. Shall we sit?”
“With pleasure; I’m exhausted.”
“No you’re not. We haven’t even done the dark tunnel maze yet.”
“I’ve never done the dark tunnel maze.”
Maria placed her drink on the table and sat down. “I’m good with dark tunnels.”
Connie laughed. “Another lesbian joke?”
“No, I’m talking about Italy. One of the things I do remember was the drive over there through lots of really long dark winding tunnels.”
“Oh sorry, I…”
Maria pulled back a chair for the blushing blonde. “Of course it’s a lesbian joke. Us lady lovers enjoy exploring dark tunnels.”
Connie couldn’t help but grimace.
“You pulled a face! You’re one of those straight girls, aren’t you? I’ll have to listen to your endless tales of male sexual relations but the minute I want to divulge anything all-female you’ll clam up.”
Connie placed her mocha on the table and sat down. “Clam up? Surely there’s a lesbian joke in there somewhere, isn’t there?” She smiled. “Anyway, people with three-year-olds don’t have relations.”
“Don’t they?”
“Well they have birthdays. You know the type,” she mouthed the words, “where you’re obliged.”
Maria laughed. “It’s my birthday soon.”
“Should I oblige?” Instantly Connie tried to cover her face with her hands. “I’m so sorry. I have no idea where that came from. I try and keep up with your joking and the wrong words fall out of my mouth.”
“That’s the best offer I’ve had in years.”
Fanning her face Connie continued. “I don’t even talk to my real friends like that.”
“Real friends?”
“Sorry, I mean…” She lifted her mug and took a large gulp, scalding her tongue and spilling some froth. “Oh look at me. I’m all of a dither.”
“All of a dither? Who says that nowadays? And why aren’t I a real friend yet?”
Connie placed her mug back on the table and tried to cool her cheeks with the backs of her hands. “Don’t you think it’s strange how we’re chatting? Like we’ve known each other for years?”
“We’re in week two. We click, that’s all. Our friendship’s developing.”
Connie shrugged. “But how do we click? How is it possible? You’re like some mature, sophisticated international business woman, and I’m just a short, plump mother of one.”
“You’re not plump,” Maria enforced her words, “at all. And I’m not sure how I’ve ever acted mature and sophisticated. Didn’t you see me on that pirate ship?”
Connie laughed. “It’s your presence. There’s just something about you. It’s something that usually scares people like me off women like you. You have that sort of air of togetherness.”
“You can be together and still have good fun.”
“I know, but it’s like I was saying before. What you see isn’t quite what you get with you. You dress beautifully. Your hair’s always perfect. Your figure’s incredible. You’ve got businesses. Your life’s on a path.” She paused. “But then you’re all chatty and open and you can get giggly and,” she crinkled her nose, “a bit silly sometimes. It’s just not what you’d expect when you look at you.”
The soft lips turned at the corners into a thoughtful smile. “Perspective’s funny isn’t it. Everyone always thinks the grass is greener on the other side, but no one’s living that perfect life. The key is just to water the grass on your own side of the hedge.”
“I live in a barn.”
Maria laughed. “Well it must be a beautiful barn conversion with huge sash windows and a paddock at the back because what I see is a free spirit who’s friendly and fun and loving her life.”
Connie sighed and dropped her eyes to her mug. “My partner Karl didn’t come home last night. I’m not loving my life and I’m anything but free.”
“Oh, I…”
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. You bring out the fun me. I don’t want to drag us both down.”
Maria tilted her head to the side. “I’m a lonely old lesbian with no real friends. Does that help?”
“Ha. A little bit. But I know you’re lying.”
“Well I’m friendly with lots of people: my employees, my neighbours, the mums at the groups. But my real friends have moved on with their lives. I see them now and again, but it’s never the same. It’s not their fault. They’ve got partners and only need to dip in and out every so often. But I do miss their company.”
“You must have one best friend though? Women like you always have that one posh person they lunch with, gossip with and shop with.”
“Oh I have those, but they’re typically false and quite bitchy.”
“So why suddenly turn up at the community hall playgroup? Did you want to enhance your social group with women like Crusty?”
Maria shifted in her seat. “No. I had one b
est friend. Phoebe. We’d known each other since school. She thought I was doing the wrong thing when I said I wanted to raise a child on my own. She tried to talk me out of it, told me I was selfish.” Maria paused. “I really needed her, but she walked away. She couldn’t support my decision and I lost her.”
“What a bitch.”
“Not really; people are entitled to their own opinions. But I’d heard on the grapevine that she’d got married and had a baby and I just thought she might be there. I guess I wanted to show her how well I was doing and how precious and perfect Alice is.” She smiled. “I’ve been trying a new group each week for the past couple of months now. I only came back to the community centre so I could see you again.”
Connie rolled her eyes. “Yeah right.” She sipped on her coffee and thought out loud. “Don’t you have her number though? Can’t you just call her?”
Maria shrugged. “I think I’m a bit proud. I want to accidentally bump into her and make her realise she’s wrong without having to say a single word.” She nodded towards the giggles coming from the bouncy pillow. “Alice is the one thing I know I’ve got right. The one decision I know was my best.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll find her on Facebook. I’ll stalk her for you.” Connie snarled. “We’ll show her. She’ll be grovelling to have you back, but I’ll be there wagging my finger saying nuh-uh she’s mine now.” The laugh that Connie loved to hear rang out once more. “It’s true,” she said with a smile.
“And what do you want me to do for you?” asked Maria.
“Just hanging out like this is great. It takes my mind off things.”
“What’s your partner’s name again?
“Karl.”
“I could tell Karl he’s a twat for leaving you home alone.”
The voice was low and irritated. “I’d rather you told Connie that private lives should be kept private.”
Connie spun round and looked up at her boyfriend. “Karl! What are you doing here?”