by Iris Blobel
The silence hung in the air like a heavy fog only interrupted by the sound of Niall’s car in the driveway, followed by rushed footsteps into the house and down the hall. Emily almost stormed into the room, settling next to Jack on the other side of the bed, taking his hand into hers.
“Jack?” she whispered.
Niall stepped behind Emily and placed a hand on her shoulder.
When Jack opened his mouth one more time, only a few words passed his lips. Words Connor would never forget.
“I love you, Son. I always have. Promise me you’ll look after Emmy.” Slowly, he turned his head towards Niall. “I love all four of you. And Nick. He’s given me so much joy.” Then he closed his eyes for the last time. “So much joy,” he whispered.
The silence hung heavy into the room as a smile crossed Jack’s face as a last breath escaped his lungs.
In a surprisingly professional manner, Emily checked Jack’s pulse on his hand and then tentatively with two fingers at this throat. She slowly shook her head as a hesitant sob escaped her.
And even though he’d shed a few tears over the last few weeks, Connor was unprepared for the overwhelming emotions and tears at that moment. He stared at his father, as he lay there and whispered, “I love you, too, Dad.”
Connor didn’t know how long they sat in silence in the room, with the only sound being Emily’s soft sobs. Niall was the first to move when he took Jack’s hands and placed them on top of his chest. Then he stepped back, pulled out his phone, and whispered, “I’m going to call Dr. Miller.”
Out of the corner of his eye, Connor watched Emily as she stood and came around the bed. Without any words she placed her arms around him and dug her face into his chest. Her shoulders began to shake gently as her body rocked with every sob. Cradling her in his arms, he kissed the top of her head, his hand moving up and down her back. They stood there in silence, both overwhelmed by emotions, both trying to understand the impact of what had happened, letting the change sink in.
When Niall came back into the room, Connor looked up and saw his friend struggling as well.
“Dr. Miller will be here soon,” he said just above a whisper. “I left a message for Ethan as well.”
Emily looked up. “They finally have a holiday, and now it’ll always have a sour taste to it.”
***
The funeral was beautiful. Even though it was near the end of January, the day was cool with a mild breeze coming off the ocean. The church was packed, with Emily sitting at the very front next to Connor to her right and Nick to her left, with the boy looking even smaller than he actually was, his eyes puffy and red. It tore at her already aching heart even more. Ethan and Niall stood and delivered a wonderful eulogy which had everyone in tears. Connor spoke a few words as well, mainly how much he regretted to have had so little time with his father, but how grateful he was for days they’d spent together.
The following few weeks were a blur for Emily. Even though everyone knew and expected Jack’s death, it still shook up the community, yet especially the four friends.
But Emily took it really hard. Whereas Ethan seemed not only distracted by caring for Nick who was equally shaken up by the loss, but with some problems the new school teacher had, and Niall seemed side-tracked with Melody, Emily seemed unable to cope with even the simplest things of her day-to-day life. It was only a few days after the funeral that Connor had come over, packed her bags, and made her stay with him. She hadn’t resisted, because it helped to have him around. Then there were meetings with lawyers, visits from friends offering condolences to both of them, as well as her mum and dad, bringing along the occasional dinner. It all helped her not to break down in her own grief.
The reading of the will was straight forward. There’d been no surprises, with Ethan and Niall receiving most of the business, Connor receiving the rest as well as the house and the property for twelve months and then for good, if he chose to settle in Fermosa Bay, and Emily a large amount of cash and investments.
One afternoon Emily came home and found Connor on the deck cooking meat on the barbeque. She headed straight towards him and into his embrace. Wrapping her arms around his waist, she savoured the feel of his warm body.
Connor placed a kiss on the top of her head. “How are you today?”
With a simple shrug she replied, “Same as yesterday. Same as the day before.”
“I’ve made a nice tossed salad to go with the steak.”
“I’m not really hungry,” she mumbled against his chest.
“Same as yesterday. Same as the day before,” he replied with concern his voice.
“I miss him so much, is all.” Her voice nearly broke, her emotions hard to control.
“I know. And I know it’s hard for you,” he said just above a whisper. “Your grief will be with you for a little while longer, but it’ll get easier with time.”
“It doesn’t feel easier.”
“Sunshine. I know it sounds like a cliché, but Dad wouldn’t like you to agonise like this.”
She leaned in even closer, taking in as much of him as she was able to. Finally, she gave a slow nod into his chest. “I know you’re right, but it’s so hard.”
Connor moved her away from him a little and curved his finger under her chin, tilting her face up to his. The expression in his eyes showed indecision and something inside her quivered, worried about what he was going to say.
“I handed in my resignation to Duncan yesterday,” he said.
Letting the words sink in, she blinked a couple of times to process the words her ears had just relayed to her brain. “I’m…I’m not sure…” She paused, not sure what she wasn’t sure about. “What does that mean?”
He brushed her cheek with his thumb. “I’ve come home. This is home.” His voice was soft and just barely loud enough for her to hear.
Emily wasn’t sure whether to smile or cry, unsure about her feelings. She couldn’t believe Connor had finally made the decision to stay for good.
But why?
And why hadn’t he been able to make the decision when Jack was still alive? Why hadn’t he told him, so he could’ve passed away knowing?
“I expected a little bit more…don’t know…joy?”
She stepped back and held his gaze. “I don’t understand.”
Connor turned and switched off the barbeque before placing the meat onto a tray. She saw in the movement of his shoulder that he let out a long, heavy sigh.
He turned back to her. “The days with Dad were the best days I had in my life. We laughed, we cried, we shared, and sometimes we just sat in silence and stared across the ocean.” Pausing for a moment, he grabbed the tray with the meat and walked over to the table, dishing out dinner for both of them. “Have something to eat, please.”
Emily followed him to the table, not quite sure what to think or what to hope for.
Connor sat. “The day he forced me to take a swim in the surf was the day I wanted to pack my bags and head back to London. But he knew better. He knew me.”
Nibbling on her bottom lip, she hung onto every word he spoke.
“The last few days got me thinking.” He moved his hand across the table and placed it over hers, and she was sure there was a trace of laughter in his voice. “There is most likely a better timing and reasoning than this, but sunshine—”
Connor stood and took the chair next to Emily. “I need you to eat.”
One of her eyebrows slashed upwards. “Excuse me?” This wasn’t at all what she’d expected to hear from him.
“I know you’re still grieving for Dad, but having you here feels so right, feels like the last piece of my puzzle falling into place. I know we’re both still vulnerable from our loss, but waking up with you next to me in the morning, coming home knowing you’ll be around, sitting next to you here and watching the sea…it’s what I want. Every nerve inside me tells me, this is how life is supposed to be.”
Emily’s gaze followed his hand as he took hers. “Sunshine,
I need you to eat, because I’m going to be around for good. Not just twelve months, but for good. And I want to spend every single moment of this time with you. I need you to eat, so we can have little Jack juniors.”
Lifting her gaze to meet his, Emily opened her mouth but nothing came out.
“I love you, Emily. I wish Dad would’ve taken his damn medication to have lived a little bit longer. A few months, for Pete’s sake, a few weeks was all I needed to figure it out.”
When her eyes met his again, confusion and surprise hit her. Tears ran down his cheeks. Gently, she wiped them with her finger.
“I love you, Emily,” he whispered. “I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you.” Then he took her hand and tenderly kissed it. “There’s a ring somewhere inside, so this is earnest and sincere.” He took a deep breath. “Emily, will you marry me?”
She looked into his eyes, blinking her own tears away. Breathing at that moment was hard, with her heart pounding like a drum in her chest and because emotions clogged her throat, she simply nodded.
“Is this a yes?”
“I wish Jack could hear you asking me.”
“He does. Just because you can’t see his body doesn’t mean he’s not around. He’s here. You just have to believe it.”
“Very sophisticated words for a lawyer,” she teased him.
Without a reply, Connor lowered his head to gently touch her lips with his. A brief shiver rippled through her as she felt wrapped into an invisible warmth, and dizzied by his nearness, she returned his kiss by slightly opening her mouth.
When she finally broke the kiss, she asked, “It’s a decent ring, though. You’re not hiding something hideous?”
A small frown came onto Connor’s forehead. “What?”
She laughed and when she saw the corners of his mouth twitching into a smile, she noticed that it’d been the first laugh since Jack’s death. Connor was the person who’d been able to make her smile again. “I love you, too,” she finally whispered before giving him another kiss.
One of so many more to come.
Epilogue
Connor leaned back into his seat in which Jack used to sit when they’d been out on the deck and watched Emily gazing at the ring he’d finally given her. It was a beautiful diamond ring, so perfect for her. And so was she. Never in his wildest dreams had he ever thought that returning to Fermosa Bay was not only to find is father, but also his new life. It was like the planets had finally aligned for him. He loved Emily from the bottom of his heart and soul, and despite the occasional doubt to throw himself into a job he knew near nothing about, deep inside he knew the decision to stay was right.
He’d called his mother a couple of times, and the news of Jack had even unsettled her for a few days. Telling her about Jack had obviously reminded her of the good times they’d shared, and Connor was somehow pleased to hear that, although in the past, his parents had loved each other at some stage in their lives. He’d sent her photos of him and Emily, as well as Ethan, Niall, and little Nick.
“Goodness gracious, Connor,” she’d said on the phone with a little laugh in her voice. “The little boy looks just like his father when he was young.”
“These two are a great team,” he’d replied.
“And Emily…oh my…what a beautiful woman she’s turned into. You two will have such gorgeous looking children. I’m sure of it.”
It’d made him chuckle, but inside, he knew he was ready for children. He and Emily had Nick staying over a couple of times, and the sound of a child in the house made him yearn for his own.
The laughter of his friends hauled him back from his thoughts. Everyone was here to celebrate their engagement, as well as Jack’s life, because he’d been an important crossing along the paths of their lives.
Now he was the echo of their past.
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Acknowledgments
Thanks, Danke, Merci-no word can express the gratitude I have for the three most important people in my life: my husband and my two beautiful girls. I love you!
Thanks to my beta readers for such great feedback. You’re doing a fantastic job. Anything I didn’t get right is my own fault.
My appreciation, again, to the team at Limitless Publishing to make my story shine. You’re such a bunch of great people!
About the Author
Iris Blobel was born and raised in Germany and only immigrated to Australia in the late 1990s. Having had the travel bug most of her life, Iris spent quite some time living in Scotland, London as well as Canada where she her husband. Her love for putting her stories onto paper has only emerged recently, but now her laptop is a constant companion.
Iris resides west of Melbourne with her husband and her two beautiful daughters.
Next to her job at a private school, she also presents a German Program at the local Community Radio.
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