by J Grayland
“You should have woken me,” I said sleepily.
“You forget, sweetheart, watching you sleep is my favorite pastime.”
“So, how did it all go?” I asked, trying to ignore his growing erection that was now pressing against my lower back.
“Great. It all went to plan. Now the heavy work begins.”
“I’m so proud of you and Paxton. This was a huge deal to organize, and you both did it even with all my problems interfering with the process,” I said.
“You will never be a problem. You are a pleasure, and I have a very efficient and smart brother,” he said with pride.
“It couldn’t have been done without you, either. Don’t sell yourself short, Nate. Paxton might be efficient and smart, but your vision, drive, and security knowledge played a huge part, as well.”
“I missed you,” he breathed into the back of my neck, his warm mouth placing small kisses against my skin.
“I missed you, too,” I told him as I rolled over to face him and his huge erection head on.
“Hmm, we both missed you,” he said as he pulled me closer, rolling his hips to press his hard shaft against the skin of my stomach.
“I guess we’d better do something to fix that then, huh?”
“You read my mind completely,” he breathed, just before his lips hit mine.
The following weeks flew by in a whirlwind of normality. Well, here at home, at least. Not so much for Nate and Paxton at King Security. There, it had become a little hectic since they took on the West Bank contract, which was understandable with the size of the job. They had also taken on another contract from a huge supermarket chain, three more nightclubs, and a couple of private contracts, as well. Needless to say, when Nate came home at night, he was pretty exhausted from the day.
My days, on the other hand, were quite the opposite. Carmel always came early every Monday morning with a plan of helping me around the house, but really, there was nothing for her to do. And she always turned up with a frozen lasagna or casseroles that went straight into the freezer. I had stopped arguing the point that she didn’t need to cook for us when I realized that she liked to do it, and she seemed to get so much pleasure from sharing her own family recipes with us. So Mondays became exploration days for us both. We would check websites to find out what was happening around the community and troll street markets looking for bargains. I loved spending time with her. She had become a great friend, and we always seemed to find something to talk about, sometimes for hours out on the back deck as we watched the ocean and sipped on her famous iced sweet tea.
Usually on Tuesdays, Lynda would bring Emily over for a few hours, and we would have lunch and chat. Then she would leave Emily with me for the rest of the afternoon, going home to work on her latest painting. I was so glad that she had started again. Her skill with a paintbrush was just amazing, and I loved spending time with the little tyke while Lynda enjoyed some time to herself. Emily and I spent some quality time together, which included me getting puked and dribbled on several times, not to mention the stench that oozed from her diapers. Now, that was so bad, I’m pretty sure it could melt the wax in your ears. This little bundle of joy was definitely an overall smelly, eating, pooping world champion.
I also got to enjoy the good parts, from the wonderful, fresh, clean baby smell of her soft skin to her little giggles as I blew raspberries against her soft, warm tummy to watching her small, bow-like pink lips as she slept. She was just so beautiful and so thought provoking. Every time I looked at her, I swore my ovaries pulsed with the need to have a baby of my own. Since I had been spending so much time with this little bundle of perfection, I had been thinking more and more about Nate wanting a family some day, and then a pang of guilt hit me hard at the thought of not being able to provide him with his own biological children. We had talked about it, and he was aware of the slim to none chance of me ever being able to get pregnant or even carry a baby to full term after the mess my reproductive system was left in. It was also something I had never really looked into thoroughly, either. I mean, I remembered what the doctors had told me years ago in regards to my possible future infertility due to all the scar tissue inside of my body, but it wasn’t something I had ever thought about. At the time, it seemed inconsequential, until now.
Nate would always get home a little earlier on the afternoons that Emily was here. He absolutely loved to spend time playing with his niece. After giving me a quick kiss on the top of my head, he pulled off his boots and got onto the floor to join us in our play. I adored watching him play with Emily, giving her little kisses and watching as his huge, strong hands gently stroked her hair and tickled her tiny feet. Watching him in this way caused a pain to ripple across my heart with the thought of never being able to carry his baby in my belly.
I drew my thoughts back into myself. I didn’t want Nate to think that spending time with Emily might be painful for me. I knew how protective he was of me emotionally, and if he ever suspected that by looking after her that I was torturing myself, I knew he would try to shield me from it in any way possible. Thankfully, at the moment, he was too engrossed in playing peek-a-boo with her to notice me immersed in my own deep thoughts.
The next day, he surprised me with an early delivery from a garden center in Florida. He had found me some Jacaranda trees online and had purchased six small spruces to plant around the garden. I was so excited, I almost knocked him down when he walked through the door that night, and let’s just say he also got very lucky that night.
Chapter Twenty-eight
Nate
As soon as I got into my office Monday morning, I received a text from Paxton asking me to come down to his office. Making my way down the hallway toward his door, his secretary, Gloria, an older woman who had worked in that position for at least the last five years, looked up from where she was typing.
“Good morning, Mr. King. Please, go right in.”
“Thanks, Gloria,” I said as I knocked and then pushed open his door. Paxton’s office was the complete opposite of my own. While I liked the huge wall of glass, he liked the windows covered with stiff, gray blinds. My office was tidy and minimal, but his was wall-to-wall bookcases and filing cabinets, all crammed full. His desk held two computer screens and a pile of files and papers so tall I could hardly see him sitting behind them. He stood up from behind his desk looking slightly disheveled, with his suit jacket off, the top button of his crisp, white dress shirt undone, and his tie loosened. He looked stressed, which was an unusual look for my little brother first thing in the morning. Shoving his hands into his dress pant pockets, he leaned against the front of his desk.
“What is it, Paxton?” I asked with concern.
“We have a bit of a problem with one of the private contracts we took on,” he breathed out with exasperated annoyance.
“Which one?”
“Barrett Adams.”
“The state senator?” I questioned, and he nodded. “What kind of a problem?”
“Well, the contract is for the senator’s private protection, right?”
“Yes, for a conference he’s attending.”
“Well, the senator asked for you to take on the role personally.”
“I know, and that’s not a problem,” I reassured him.
“Yes, well, I didn’t think it would be either until I just received his itinerary.” Paxton blew out a breath and then reached behind him, grabbing a sheet of paper and handing it to me. Looking down at it, all I saw were three words: “FOUR DAYS” and “LONDON.” I looked back up to Paxton with fury.
“Four days in London? For fuck’s sake, Paxton, I thought this was a one day gig in the next state or something, not on the other side of the pond!”
“I know. I’m sorry, Nate, I should have asked more questions before I agreed for you to do it,” Paxton said, sounding deflated.
“Four days in the U.K.?
” I repeated.
“Yes, he’s attending the Sedex Conference, and he’ll be staying at the Rosewood Hotel near the Covent Gardens in London. That’s where you’ll be staying, as well.”
“Fuck,” I seethed. I pushed a hand through my hair, then started to pace his office, trying to contain my anger to keep it from igniting and exploding onto Paxton. I knew it wasn’t his fault, but I fucking promised myself that I would never be away from Casey or the office for more than a day. Maybe I could take her with me? No, that wasn’t a good idea. Not when I’m on a job doing private protection. I might inadvertently put her in danger if anything happened to the senator while we were there.
“Nate,” Paxton said, breaking into my train of thought. Looking up at him, I could see the lines of worry etched on his face.
“Relax, Paxton. I’m not going to rip your head off. I know it’s not your fault; it’s just business. It’s just…I don’t like to be away from Casey. Especially for four fucking days in another country.”
“I understand. I did try and talk him into having someone else, but he insisted on you. Or we could just cancel the contract. I mean, it might cause a few problems, but I’m sure I could work it out.”
“No, Paxton, it’s fine. You know once we take on a contract, we see it through to the end,” I said, looking at him as he nodded.
“Casey can come stay with us while you’re gone. Lynda would love it,” he said.
“If only it was that simple. I know her too well. She will insist on staying at home, giving me a big lecture on how she’s not a baby, she doesn’t need a sitter, and she doesn’t want to put you both out.” I sighed in frustration at her stubbornness.
Paxton’s eyes roamed around his office as we both tried to think of another solution. “What about Mrs. Winters ?” Paxton said suddenly.
“Mrs. Winters?” I asked, perplexed.
“Yes, what if she stays with Casey?”
“Now, that might work,” I said, pointing a finger at him.
“It’s worth a try, Nate. And I am sorry about all this. I am even pissed at myself. I’m always nagging at you to let others take the risks, and here I am, throwing you into the deep end.”
“Like I said, don’t worry. It doesn’t seem like a risky job. It’s more the being away, you know?” I asked, rubbing a finger along my bottom lip in thought.
“Yeah, I do. I wouldn’t want to leave my two girls to go over the other side of the pond either,” he said with a grimace, and I could see he was pretty disappointed in himself with the whole situation, and it bugged me to see him this way. Moving over to him, I gave him a brotherly slap on the back.
“Don’t worry, it’ll be fine,” I told him, but the look he gave me told me that he would continue to beat himself up over it for the next few days no matter what I said to him.
I pulled into the driveway later that afternoon, and as I got closer to the house, I saw Casey with a shovel in her hand, digging at one side of the house. Pulling up in front of the house, I watched her for just a few moments. She was wearing a thin, white sundress and a pair of sneakers with her beautiful golden hair pulled into a braid down her back. She looked so intense, but humorous at the same time as she rammed the shovel into the ground, scooping dirt from a hole at her feet. As much as I loved to just watch whatever she was doing, I really wanted to take over for her. Climbing out of the car, I walked across the grass to where she was working. I lifted her face to look at me. Her cheeks were flushed, and small beads of sweat trickled down the side of her face. Her smile was wide and beaming. “Hi,” she said as she brushed the sweat off her brow with the back of her hand.
“You know I would have helped you with this on Saturday, right?”
“I know, I just thought I would get a head start.”
Reaching out for the shovel, I said, “Here, let me. You look hot.” Handing me the shovel, she sighed, and I was sure she was happy with my offer as she took a step back and watched as I made quick work of getting the hole to the depth required for the Jacaranda spruce she already had in her hand, ready for planting. An hour later, all six trees were planted in the allocated spots that she randomly picked out around the house. We headed inside and took a shower where I spent some time giving her a more proper and longer greeting with my mouth.
Clean and sweat-free, we sat out on the back deck with a bottle of water each, and I figured it was the perfect moment for me to let her know about my trip. But before I could speak she said, “So, what’s on your mind?”
Turning toward her with a raised brow, I took a drink from the water bottle and said, “What makes you think I have something on my mind?”
“Because the muscle in the side of your jaw is twitching, and it only seems to do that if you’re pissed at me or you want to talk about something that you think will upset me or piss me off,” she said, grinning.
“Hmm, I think I might have to be more aware of that twitching in the future, then.”
“Okay, spill it, Mr. King. What’s on your mind?” she asked, leaning her head against my shoulder.
“One of the private contracts Paxton took on is private security for a senator attending a conference, who requested me personally,” I started.
“Okay, go on,” she said slowly.
“It’s for four days, and it’s in London,” I finished. She sat silently for a few minutes.
“Is it dangerous?” she asked quietly.
“No. No, baby, it’s not that,” I said, realizing that her first thought was worry about my safety. I cupped her face in my hands. I needed her to see my eyes and see that I was far from worried about that.
“Then what is it, Nate?”
“You, baby. I don’t want to leave you.” I felt the tension ease from her through my hands. She placed her hands over mine.
“Look, I know this is part of your job, Nate, and as long as you’re safe, then I’ll be fine.” Closing my eyes, I leaned my forehead against hers and just breathed her in.
“I love you so fucking much,” I said.
“I love you, too. Just be safe,” she whispered against my lips, her breath warm with a slight hint of mint.
“Okay, then we need to get inside,” I growled.
“Why is that?” she asked with a grin.
“Because I only have the next few days to fuck you on every surface and in every position before I leave, and I want to get my fill of you before I go, so we need to get started right now,” I said as I stood, grabbed her hand, and pulled her inside behind me, captivated by her excited giggle as I almost dragged her into the bedroom.
Chapter Twenty-nine
Casey
It was morning, and I stood outside, wrapped tightly in Nate’s arms, my hands gripping onto the back of his black, silk dress shirt, and my cheek pressed against his chest. I just needed to absorb him—his touch, his smell, everything. Over the past few days, we had done nothing but be with each other, and I reasoned with myself by reminding myself that I spent many years by myself, and this would be easy. But in those lonely years of mine, I didn’t have him, and now that it was time for him to leave, it was more painful than I could have imagined. I closed my eyes and just felt him before he put a finger under my chin, tilting it up to him and placing a soft kiss on my lips.
“You okay?” he asked, his eyes searching mine for confirmation, and I nodded. “Remember to have Mrs. Winters stay over, and if you need anything, just call Paxton, okay?”
“I will.”
“I’ll call you when I get to the hotel.”
“You do that,” I said to him, and with one last kiss, I watched as he slid into the Audi, started the engine, and drove off down the driveway and out of my line of sight. Wrapping my arms around my waist, I lost myself for a few moments in the emptiness I was left with until I was brought back to reality by the feeling of a ball being dropped at my feet. When I looked
down into Chance’s large, brown eyes with his wagging tail and excited tongue hanging out, salivating at the expected play time, it made me smile and scratch the top of his head before picking up the ball and tossing it down the gravel driveway. I laughed as I watched him run after it, and his playfulness made me realize that I was going to be fine, and I wasn’t alone.
As expected, Carmel turned up on the doorstep later that morning carrying several bags full of groceries. “You didn’t have to bring all that,” I said, pointing to the bulging bags as she hefted them onto the kitchen island.
“I know, but I have plans for us,” she said with a wicked grin.
“Oh yes, what kind of plans?”
“I thought we might do some old-fashioned baking. You know, cook us up a batch of double chocolate fudge brownies and some chocolate chips cookies.”
“Oh my, that does sound good,” I said, my mouth watering at the thought.
“Yeah, well there ain’t nothing better when you’re feeling blue than watching a good movie and eating yourself into a chocolate coma. It always eases the pain,” she said, giving me a wink.
“You are such a gem,” I said, giving her a hug of appreciation that she knew exactly how I felt without me having to say anything.
And that was how we spent our day—covered in flour, sugar, and chocolate with the sweet, warm smells penetrating the walls of every room in the house. It was heavenly. We didn’t even bother to cook anything for dinner because we were so full just from licking our fingers and tasting everything. By the time we sunk into the couch and looked for a movie to watch, we were both starting to feel too sick in the stomach to even think about eating anything for the rest of the week. After the movie, which Carmel chose (big mistake because I should have known she would want to watch an old cowboy movie that seemed to never end), I locked up the house, showed Carmel to the guest room that I had made up earlier, and said goodnight before getting into bed, which, at the moment, seemed way too big and empty without Nate’s large frame in it. Pulling his pillow close to my body and inhaling his musky, clean scent, I hugged it tight and fell asleep.