by Linde Lean
Jenny wondered if this was aimed at making her feel better, that she would become complacent, and accept this life without Ryan’s love, for the sake of their child?
Suddenly Ryan lifted her up and carried her to the shower cubicle. He set her down on the built in ledge against the wall. She was face to face, with him and he held her eyes.
“What’s going on in the head of yours?”
His strong arms held her captive against him.
“Nothing.” Breaking eye contact with him, she knew of only one way to divert him from his question, she draped her arms over his shoulder and clasped her hands around neck. When, he stepped back, her automatic reaction was to lift her legs and spread them around his hips. Their intimate embrace brought a smile to his lips.
“Now that feels good.” He told her.
Nestling her head into his shoulder she enjoyed the pleasure of feeling him against her. She felt and heard his chuckle of pleasure. He stood between her open thighs, his buttocks firm, his thigh muscled contracted as he controlled his movements.
Then Ryan sat her down on the ledge, which had been warmed by the under tile heating, he placed his hands on either side of her knees on the inside of her thighs, and opened her legs bringing her womanhood in line with his erection.
Taking her hands, he linked his fingers into hers, and then lifted her arms above her head and rested their linked hands against the wall. Her full, breasts and round pert nipples lifted as he did so.
Softly he commanded, “Look at me.”
She lifted her eyes to his.
“What you and I share, is unique, people who do not experience what we have will not miss what they do not know. But you and I, Jen, will never be satisfied with anything less now that we have tasted this!” Ryan’s voice was husky with desire he leant down and gave her a lingering kiss, savoring her lips, as if it was a delicacy.
“Look at me as I enter you, I want you to see what you do to me.”
Jenny’s eyes went down, and watch as he placed his engorged erection, between her legs, and then she watched as it slipped into her inch by inch this was so erotic, as she felt it him go up and deep into the very being of her.
Ryan brought their hands down, and she took him into her embrace as he plunged rhythmically into her. Her seated position gave him perfect access, and gave her a ride that took her to wonderful heights.
As she felt him climax, he softly whispered, “Jen … I love you!”
Jenny loved him, to deny it would be cheating them both.
“Darling, I love you too.”
Jenny at last said the words.
But Ryan heard the reserve. There was still something that made this moment and the words not quite right. But at least it was a start. He would use all his powers of persuasion to break down her defenses even if it meant seducing her again and again, he was playing the most important game of his life and he intended to win.
Jenny held onto him, not sure that his feeling for her was as deep as hers was for him. That, she sexually more than satisfied him, did not necessarily mean that his feelings for her was as all consuming as hers was for him. He was her morning and her night, her beginning and her end. She wanted to be that to him too.
She’d made do for so long in her life that just this once she’d wanted that all consuming love to be there, just for her. She’d needed it like she needed the air she breathed. But perhaps she should be content with what they had?
Some of her desperation reached Ryan; he still had a way to go, before she could accept that she was his alpha and omega. This child she carried was a product of their love, but a child could never take her place in his life. Even Andy took second place to her needs, being farmed out to his parents. Not that Andy realized this and he enjoyed being with his grand parents, but Ryan would put her needs and his need for her first. She was his lover, his friend and he hoped soon wife and then mother of his child.
He wanted to grow old with her, when the physical was no longer important he would still have his best friend with him. He knew, that he meant all of this to her, but he had to get her to acknowledge that he was all of this to her as well.
As they were finished up in the bathroom Jenny found that her curiousness could not be contained. “Ryan…”
Hearing the question in his voice, he looked at her,” Yes?” He was fascinated by the warm flush on her cheeks, which had nothing to do he was sure with her exertion.
“The steps in the shower…?”
“Ahhh, well that was a little initiative from me. I know that sometimes my height can make it difficult for you to reach me how and when you want to, without assistance.” He watched the flush deepen.
“So, they are there for me, to use?”
Nodding he concurred and the dead sexy smile on his face had her heart melting.
“Yip, I have no use for them, other than to initiate you in their use, being the male chauvinist that I am, I can take from you whatever I want. This puts you in the driver’s seat Lady.”
Jenny could see the devilish enjoyment in his eyes, as he anticipated everything she could and would do with him in the future in that shower. Just thinking of it had her body go into overdrive.
“Come woman, let’s get out of here, before we are caught in this suit the whole day!”
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Chapter Seventeen
That set the trend for the rest of the week, Ryan still did most of his work from home, and only occasionally went into the office and sometimes he took her with him. Later he would take her out to dine and often went the Theatre.
One such evening after most of Ryan’s Office staff had left Jenny got to enjoy him on his large desk. Everything on his desk emptied with one swell swoop of his strong arms.
He did not take her rather she took him, enjoying him under her as she rode him.
Now whenever she thought of him at the office, this enjoyment of each other came to mind. Ryan also confirmed to her with a cheeky grin that he could not look at his desk without thinking of her.
Toward the end of the week, Jenny enquired when Andy was coming home, as she missed him. Ryan told her that he could not postpone his trip to America, as he was required on the site of the new resort and hotel they were building in Las Vegas, and he wanted her to come with him, they would be away for about two weeks.
Jenny did not want to be separated from him yet, she had come to enjoy being spoilt with his presence. But she could also see that the toll of being with her and trying to run his business was having an effect on him. He looked fatigued perhaps this would give him an opportunity to take a break as well. She knew she was being selfish and that when they came back she would have to let him get back to his work routine.
They left for Las Vegas on the family jet. Jenny read the book he’d bought her, which she had difficulty finding time to finish as Ryan worked on his laptop, and made conference calls. But the book could just not hold her attention, and setting the book down on her lap Jenny gave him the once over.
Her intent gaze flickered over his beautiful body and face, dressed in perfect tailored, black slacks and black shirt and she thought of all the things she wanted to do to him.
Ryan caught that one look and his immediate reaction to that look had her breathless That he could read her intentions in her eyes and react so instantly to her, made her realize how attuned they were to each other.
He put his work away; lifted the internal phone and instructed the cabin crew in the galley that they were not to be disturbed for the next two hours.
Jenny lifted her brows at the time frame, but laughed deeply and happily as she went to firmly plant herself on his lap, her fingers already undoing his pants and zip. Her, light pink and white floral designer silk dressed pulled up around her hips.
As his hand went between her legs, she knew he felt how wet and ready she was for him. His low-throated laugh filled the cabin. Moving lower, she released his enormous erection from his slacks, her head
went down and she took him into her mouth. Her warm moist lips and tongue enclosed around him. Peeping up at him, Jenny watched the look on his face. His head thrown back, the muscles in his neck pulled taunt. Jenny found this a fantastic reciprocal, turn on.
Later when they disembarked Jenny did not make eye contact with the crew.
Ryan proudly left the jet with her, noted the looks of envy from the flight attendants, which Jenny missed. They would not mind servicing him. But their looks did not turn him on nor did it elicit anything more from him than the knowledge that they found him attractive. What he did keep his eye on, were the admiring glances the male crew gave Jenny, to which she was oblivious.
The project that he was working on was huge, and billions were being put into it. It was a City within a City, The lost City, bringing the style and architecture of Africa to America, with vast gardens and waterfalls, suspending rope bridges and a bridge constructed of stone that simulated an earth tremor. Punctuating, an African experience, when a herd of elephants were on the move, or a stampede.
The hotel sported all the luxury that the affluent visitors would expect. The casino, maintained the illusion and atmosphere, bringing the patrons to Africa. The game park would allow the visitors the privilege of seeing the big five of Africa in a man made nature reserve stretching thousands and thousands of miles. For the visitor who enjoyed the sea, a man made sea, with waves that allowed you to surf, and then of course for the brave at heart, a slip and slide to take you on a ride of your life.
Jenny was awed at the size of the project and the expertise that Ryan was bringing to the project, together with the other specialists.
She enjoyed Las Vegas, and Ryan took her gambling, she won at the Roulette table, but only later realized how much the chips were worth. Then she did not want to chance the ten thousand markers of which she held numerous in her hands, a small fortune.
Ryan was very nonchalant and played Baccarat with the expertise with which he handled everything in his life, including her. They cashed in their winnings and then went to their suit to enjoy their victory with each other.
Ryan made time in his hectic schedule to take her to the Grand Canyon by helicopter, and he landed on a high plateau, were they picnicked and enjoyed the spectacular view.
On the last day, Ryan ordered breakfast for them. While they were seated on the veranda, enjoying the view, from the penthouse which over looked the hotel gardens and pool, Ryan placed his hand over her now swollen abdomen.
“You’re starting to show.”
Looking up at him Jenny tried to gauge where this was going.
“Have you made up your mind, will you marry me?”
Jenny could see he was very serious, her carefree and playful partner these past idyllic days, was replaced by a committed lover, who wanted an answer. Pulling away from him Jenny sat on the comfortable padded whicker chair, and crossed her legs.
Ryan looked at her attractive legs, as the lace gown fell open.
“Ryan, why do you want us to marry, you have me, and you don’t need marriage to secure this child.” Jenny saw his lips firm, and heard him sigh before he answered.
“I’m not trying to secure the child as you want to describe our baby. I want to secure you!” He declared.
“But we do not need marriage for that.” Jenny persisted.
“Why are you set against marrying me, is it because of the kidnapping and what went with that, can’t you forgive me?” Ryan probed.
“There is nothing to forgive, it was a misunderstanding, and I would not have given myself to you in the way that I have if I harbored any ill feelings towards you. How can you think that!” Jenny stated firmly.
“Then what, Jen? What is keeping you from saying yes?”
Ryan could not understand what her reservations still were and she was still too much of a coward to come and say it, out loud. He would ride rough shot over it and how would she ever know what was genuine and what contrived? How could she insist, me, or your child, on a scale where am I?
“I don’t think you need another marriage you already had one. You married Natalie, I know in order to get your child, but you and I both know that if you really did not want to marry her you did not have to. You and your family resources and influence, could have secured your child anyway without marriage. Just, as you can now. But I do not want to be another Natalie in your life.”
Jenny skirted around the full truth but coming very close to sharing all her doubts.
“I married her because I did not want my child hating me for using my power to take him from his mother. I gave her the opportunity to be a mother to him. My conscience with what happened and went wrong is clear. But you, you are a different story, You I always wanted, and I always intended marrying you. You were never just going to be a mistress, Hell woman, I just had to snap my finger and you would have been in my bed. Is my actions that of a man just wanting a young mistress in his bed?”
As Jenny made to answer he went on, “Tell me why you would want less for our child, than what I wanted for Andy. Would you rather have your child hating you because you did not give him or her the same privileges that Andy has and that comes with being part of this family? What is your child going to feel like when he realizes he is not a Barnard, because you chose to deny him that right! Yes I can take him from you and I should threaten you with it, be careful you do not push me too far.”
Jenny heard the steel resolve in his voice. That ruthlessness which lurked just below the surface of refinement that made him a deadly adversary in the business world very evident.
“But that is not what I want for our life!” he told her.
“When you said I was starting to show, it sounded as if by my showing bore some significance now?” Jenny wanted to know.
“It does, you and I are the only ones that know you are pregnant other than the doctor, I’ve not told anyone yet.”
“Why not, are you ashamed?” Jenny looked away from him, her eyes unseeingly on the view.
“Hell, woman, why would I be ashamed? I want to shout from the roof tops, my woman is impregnated with my child. But I did not want to put any further pressure on you, you have come out of your depression and I never want to see you going so far and so deep again. I will do whatever it takes to keep you happy and if that means not marrying you then so be it, but you are staying with me, and you are denying our child the privilege he deserves and which he is entitled.”
Jenny had a lot to think about, so she replied.
“He … you think it is a boy?”
“Whatever it is, boy or girl as long as you and our baby are healthy, that is all I care about.”
“Ryan, I’ll think about it.”
Leaning down to her he took her chin in his hands and look into her perplexed blue ones.” When will you let me have your answer?” But he could see by the stubborn pout of her lips he was not going elicit a promise from her now.
“We better get dressed otherwise we are going to be late for the flight.”
“Honey I am sorry to break this to you, but if you haven’t already realized it, the plane is mine, we can be late.”
Throwing her heavy embroidered cotton serviette playfully at him, she chided.
“Man, you know what I mean!”
“Yes woman I do, but now I have something different on my mind, and yes we are going to be late, very late for our flight!”
If this was the only way he could get her commitment for now, then so be it.
They returned home, and Andy came back from his grandparent’s. He took it in his stride, that Jenny and Ryan were sharing the master suit, and that he now had a young au pair to take care of him and to keep him busy when Jenny was not able to do so.
Jenny had resisted this move, but Ryan had been adamant and confirmed that she was the woman who he was waiting to marry and the mother of his child, she was no longer the nanny, and she was also going to need her rest as her pregnancy progressed. Andy was a full time occupation.
He reassured her that the au pair would not detract from her relationship with Andy. Nor he reassured her, would anyone be able to break the strong bond the two had forged together.
Jenny had been present when candidates were interviewed, and she was given the authority by Ryan to select the successful candidate.
She however assumed that Tracy would take up residency in her old room, but when she phoned Ryan to confirm that she had decided on her, he had endorsed her choice and then went on to confirm that Tracy would have accommodation in the staff-wing of the home. Andy was now old enough and did not need someone constantly with him, and as his room was adjacent to theirs, they would hear if he needed anything.
She wanted to take care of their baby on her own, the au pair could when the need arose, use his old room and then she could keep an eye on both children when needed.
They lived as a family, the only thing missing was Ryan’s ring on her finger. But still she clung onto the self-doubt, if only she could be sure that what they had was real. She thought it was before, and just look how that turned out. Was this it, or could she hold out, and wish for the moon? What if she was not the love of Ryan’s life and he one day met someone else? She would not be able to stand it, if she had to loose him after he had been hers.
If they never married, she would just treasure what they have now, for the time they had it and not expect more.
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Chapter Eighteen
Some months on, they had a family barbeque, and invited mutual friends over. Ryan’s family were pleased about the coming baby, and so was Andy, Jenny could see their delight. His mother took the time to reassure her of how much they loved her, as did her eldest son, and enquired from Jenny when she was going to take Ryan out of his misery?
But Jenny could not commit yet. Ryan had not pushed the matter further either, though as the months past and her body grew, she sometimes saw a glimpse of his disappointment, and hurt when he thought she was not looking.
Mike and Ryan sat on the comfortable loungers at the pool entertainment area. Everyone there swam, except Jenny, who’s inherent shyness, would not allow her, to wear a costume, nor to swim in front of the others, now that her pregnancy was so advanced.