by J. H. Croix
rough.
Much as everything he did only made me wilder inside, I was restless and needed him inside of me as soon as humanly possible. I reached between us and undid his fly inside of a second, sighing at the feel of his cock—hot and velvety—when I shoved his jeans and briefs down just enough so it bounced free. I started to yank him closer, but he pushed my hands away as he reached into his back pocket.
I shook my head and swatted at his hand. “I want to feel you,” I murmured.
When he froze, his eyes locking to mine, I suddenly got self-conscious. I hadn’t told him I’d been on the pill all this time. Jana had dragged me down to take care of that matter months ago. She’d declared she thought it was stupid not to be on the pill as a back up. She’d had her own pregnancy scare once upon a time, all over a broken condom, so she was practical about it. She’d been determined to make sure I didn’t let the lack of birth control keep me forever a virgin. I’d also done some sleuthing on professional athletes and learned they were routinely screened. With that and the knowledge that Ethan was absolute when it came to his condom use, I figured it was safe to carry on without worrying about them. What made me want to squirm was it was all over wanting to feel him with nothing between us.
Ethan was quiet, his eyes boring into me. The air got heavier around us, weighted with a depth of emotion I didn’t know how to interpret. My heart thudded against my ribs as I stared at him.
“I’m on the pill, and I just thought maybe it…”
I stopped talking when he shook his head sharply. “Obviously it’s okay. If you were wondering, I’m clean. I get tested every few months. We all do.”
“I figured,” I muttered, getting more embarrassed by the minute. Somehow admitting what I wanted—no barriers between us—felt huge, and I didn’t quite know what to do with it. “I’m clean too,” I added, belatedly realizing that was probably pointless, seeing as I’d been a virgin before him and hadn’t even gone on a date anytime in the recent past. Intellectually speaking, I knew there were other ways to worry, but I wasn’t thinking too sensibly just then.
His mouth curled at one corner, and he finally dropped the hand that had been hooked in his back pocket. Only to lift it and brush my hair away from my face. Shivers chased in the wake of his touch when his fingers brushed my ear.
His eyes never left mine as he reached between us and positioned his cock at my entrance. He held still for a beat before sinking inside, his eyes falling closed on a rough groan.
I almost came right then. I was so emotionally wrought and already teetering on the edge. It didn’t take much with him. It felt so amazing to feel him bare inside of me. I could feel every ridge of his hard cock. My body adjusted to him filling me. I didn’t realize my eyes had fallen closed until he spoke.
“Zoe.”
Through the haze of need, I met his gaze. I felt almost drunk—it felt that good to be with him like this.
He stared at me hard, his gaze searching—for what I didn’t know. “I don’t think I can take seeing another man touch you. I thought I was going to fucking lose my mind when he kissed you.”
His words were fierce.
My answer was swift and true. “I barely know him. I didn’t want him to touch me. I don’t know why he did.”
“I know,” he murmured, his lips so close to mine, I could feel them move. “It wasn’t you, but it doesn’t change that it made me want to clock him.”
I shouldn’t have savored his words, but I did. It felt oddly good knowing he felt possessive of me. I meant to say something else, but he curled his hands around my hips and pulled me past the edge of the desk, looking down as he began to move.
My gaze followed his. I watched as he drew back and sank inside of me again and again. The sight of his cock, wet and glistening from my fluids, sliding in and out of my swollen folds nearly undid me. It was so hot.
Chapter 19
Ethan
I almost lost control the second I sank inside of Zoe. In all the years I’d run wild, enjoying plenty of casual sex, I’d never, ever had sex without a condom. If there was a religion dedicated to the rigors of protected sex, I worshipped at its altar. If I didn’t want to be committed, I couldn’t expect anything more from anyone I was with. So, at thirty, I was a bareback virgin. Bloody hell, I’d had no idea what I’d been missing.
I’d been hanging on to a thin thread of control ever since that fucking asshole, Mark whoever-the-hell-he-was, had been all smarmy and put his hand on her waist and fucking kissed her cheek. She might not have picked up on it, but I knew exactly what he’d been doing. I might not be an ass, but I knew one when I met one. He was like a dog pissing on a tree, trying to mark his territory. Zoe, for all of her brilliance and professional confidence, didn’t quite pick up on the depth of his bullshit.
Zoe’s core was hot, slick and wet. I gripped her hips and sank into her to the hilt—again and again and again. Her channel started to throb around me—fucking hell it felt good—and those little breathy moans she made were raining down around us. I felt when she was almost there and reached between us, stroking my thumb in a circle around her slippery wet and swollen clit. She cried out, my name a broken shout, and the walls of her core pulsed around my cock. I distantly heard her knock something over as she caught her balance with her hands on the desk. My own release thundered through me with such force it was a damn good thing I had her to hold onto.
I was certain it was the longest and hardest orgasm I’d ever had. When I’d spent myself in her, the haze in my mind cleared enough that I noticed my fingers were digging into her luscious hips. I eased my grip and curled my arms around her, pulling her close against me. I didn’t quite know what to do with the emotion roaring through me, so I held her tight and breathed in the scent of her.
After a few minutes, with nothing but the sound of our breath in the quiet room, Zoe lifted her head from where she’d tucked it against my shoulder. I opened my eyes, and my heart gave a decisive thump. Her hazel gaze met mine. For a flash, I felt uncertain, but then I saw a similar uncertainty reflected in her gaze and the tension inside of me eased. I smoothed her hair back, idly counting the freckles dusting her nose.
She squeaked when the door handle to the outer door rattled. I couldn’t help but grin. Her eyes whipped from me to the door and back again.
“Can they hear us?” she hissed.
“Maybe,” I whispered back, unable to resist winding her up a bit.
As if the universe was trying to help me out, the doorknob rattled again and whoever was out there knocked a few times.
“Oh my God!” Zoe said as she started to shimmy away from me.
Considering that I’d recently discovered that being bare inside of her was truly the most spectacular feeling in the world, I wasn’t having that. I slid my hands down her sides and held her in place.
“Don’t think so, luv. The door’s bolted, so no one’s coming in. Ease up, okay?”
Her eyes flicked to mine, and the furrow between her brows smoothed slightly. “What if they can see us through the glass?”
I glanced over my shoulder. The reception area had a single door with frosted glass panes framing the door on either side. I looked back to her and shrugged, just as we heard the sound of footsteps moving away from the door.
“Much as I’d love to get you worked up over that, all anyone can see through that is blurry shapes.”
She bit the inside of her cheek and sighed. I could feel the tension leaving her body now that the unknown visitor had walked away. “You make me do crazy things,” she muttered.
My chest was tight, and my heart set to thudding against my ribs. She had no fucking clue the crazy effect she had on me, but I elected not to elaborate on that right now. I managed a breath and looked down at her. “Oh, don’t go blaming this all on me, luv. You were just as impatient as me.”
Her cheeks flushed cherry red, and she bit her lip. My cock, still buried inside of her, twitched again.
�
�I wasn’t blaming it on you. It’s just I can’t believe where we are,” she murmured.
The office phone rang, and she jumped a little. She glanced back to me. “Are you going to let me move anytime soon?”
Much as I didn’t want her to move and had a firm grip on her hips, logically I knew we couldn’t stay here all night. With a grin, I eased out of her. I helped her get her clothes back in place and tucked myself back into my briefs and jeans.
I didn’t know what to do with the feeling coursing through me. The idea of walking out of here without being with Zoe for the rest of the night made me feel restless and uncomfortable. I might not quite know what to do with how I felt, but the only refuge from my confusion was Zoe herself.
I waited while she returned to her office and powered off her computer and put away some files. I couldn’t help but savor the sight of her long legs as she strode from her desk to the filing cabinet in the corner. Fuck me. This woman had me by the balls, and I hadn’t the slightest clue what to do about it.
The asshole who she’d been meeting with earlier filtered back into my thoughts when she brushed her hair off her shoulders. I’d never, ever in my life been jealous of another guy. I’d taken one look at him and the way he treated Zoe and wanted to pummel his face and then fuck the hell out of her. I supposed I should count myself lucky I hadn’t taken it upon myself to punch his cocky face. I could only imagine the headlines that would’ve gone with that.
This train of thought looped me back to what had prompted me to come see her this evening. I was supposed to talk to her about the whole representation thing. I knew it would bother her, and I didn’t want to worry her. Yet, I’d promised Coach.
She locked the filing cabinet and then tugged her jacket on, glancing to me expectantly when she reached me where I was leaning inside the door. “You didn’t have to wait for me,” she said softly.
“I’m walking you home.”
We hadn’t openly discussed what I’d determined would happen. I’d walk her home and spend the night because I was coming to learn sleeping with Zoe was far, far better than sleeping alone. That’s what I told myself. It was true, so I could avoid the undercurrent of emotion rushing inside. The intimacy I felt with Zoe was starting to feel like the air I needed to breathe. It made me want to shy away, but I needed it. Needed her. More than I’d ever needed anything in my life.
“Oh. Are you sure? I mean, I don’t want you to think…”
I reached for her hand, reeled her to me, and kissed her. I forced myself to keep it brief. Not an easy task, given that her lips were sublime. “I want to walk you home.”
At that moment, her stomach growled. She clapped her hand over it. “Gah!”
“How about we order takeout? Don’t try to tell me you’re not hungry.”
She grinned. “I won’t. Are you sure you don’t have other plans? I can certainly feed myself.”
Bloody hell. Why did she have to be so damned independent? She kept making me say aloud the things that made me uncomfortable inside.
“I don’t have any other plans, and I’m starving,” I countered.
All of it was true. I might’ve eaten right before I came here, but losing my mind with jealousy and then fucking her on the desk made me starving all over again.
Oblivious to my internal machinations, she finally nodded and snagged her purse off a table by the door. “Okay, what do you want to eat?”
I slipped my hand around hers and walked beside her as she flicked the office lights off. Once we were in the hallway and she’d locked the door, she started rattling off suggestions for food. I’d never been a picky eater and truly would eat anything, so I randomly said yes to something.
When we stepped outside into a chilly rain, I hailed a cab and tugged her into it. Hours later, I lay in her bed with her silky skin warm against mine and listened to the sound of her breathing in sleep. She was usually tense, the only exceptions were when she was caught up in the madness between us or asleep, so I savored the feel of her lush body relaxed against me. I fell asleep feeling all was right with the world with the one small exception being I had no idea what do to about the fact this thing with Zoe was anything but casual.
Chapter 20
Zoe
“What?!” I blurted, promptly spewing coffee on the counter.
Ethan quickly snagged a napkin from the holder sitting against the wall and wiped up the coffee. We were sitting on the stools at my kitchen counter. He was seated to my side, angled toward me, with our knees bumping. This morning had been so good it almost hurt to think about it. Waking up beside Ethan was a little slice of heaven I’d never considered. He was always warm, as such I was warm whenever he was beside me. I’d woken to his lips and hands mapping their way down my body. He’d proceeded to leave me boneless with his fingers and mouth. I’d never thought much of oral sex. In fact, the few guys who’d bothered with it left me thinking it was a waste of time. With Ethan, I saw stars and my body scaled heights of pleasure I hadn’t considered possible. Before I caught my breath, his weight was settling over me, and his cock slid into me with ease.
My body still reverberating from the echoes of my first climax, I’d rolled right into another once he set to surging into me. He’d tugged me into the shower with him and now we were having coffee before he left. It was fair to say I was completely relaxed. Up until he told me Coach Hoffman had asked him to talk with me about obtaining a new attorney to handle Ethan’s charges. I spit my coffee out and now my stomach was churning.
It wasn’t that I’d forgotten about this worry. I’d just shoved it out of my mind because everything happening with Ethan was too tempting and felt too good. I closed my eyes and took a breath, only to feel his hand curling into mine. The warmth and strength of it made me suddenly want to cry. I wasn’t supposed to fall for him. But I had. Hard. I was in deep, and I had no idea how to get out.
I opened my eyes to find his worried gaze on me. “I told him I didn’t want another attorney, so that’s what we’ll do,” he said firmly.
I shook my head. “No, no, no. It may seem like forever ago, but this is the whole reason I tried to tell you I couldn’t do this. This is my mistake, not yours. I’ll call Coach Hoffman today and make some recommendations. Your case is very straightforward. We were just waiting on the court dismissal on the charges.”
He shook his head firmly. “I don’t want another attorney.”
His haughty British accent made him sound ridiculously arrogant just now. As if he could magically wave this problem away by saying it so.
“Ethan, the mess is already made. I’m mortified that Coach Hoffman knows anything about us. I can live without being on contract for the team, but I don’t want this to get out. It will look terrible for me.”
“Bloody hell. Why are you worried about that? Coach won’t say anything. You’ll fix everything with the legal thing and then we can carry on and none of it will matter,” he said, so earnestly, my heart squeezed.
I took a fortifying gulp of coffee and eyed him. “Ethan, you have to understand. If it gets out—at all—that I got involved with one of my clients, it will look bad, really bad. Trust me, I’ll get dragged through the mud. It will definitely affect my business, and I can’t do that. I can make some calls and have you set up with someone I trust right away.”
He muttered something else under his breath and then looked back at me, giving my hand a squeeze. “I don’t like it.”
“It’s either that, or we stop this. Today.”
I couldn’t quite believe I said that, but it was the only other option.
Ethan’s eyes widened and then narrowed. “No.”
I couldn’t help the joy that bloomed inside. I wasn’t supposed to be allowing any of this to happen, but I didn’t want to stop. At all.
“Okay then, you have to live with someone else being your attorney.”
He glared at me before taking a gulp of coffee. “Fine. It’s bloody stupid, but if it’s the only way you’l
l keep seeing me, then that’s what I’ll do.”
I started to free my hand from his, meaning to call Jana to ask her to make a few calls for me. I thought I might be better positioned to avoid questions about why I was handing over Ethan’s case if I wasn’t personally calling to ask a colleague to take over.
“You gonna let me make a phone call?” I asked, smiling slightly when he tightened his grip on my hand.
His eyes had gone dark. In a flash, the air around us was heavy. “In a sec,” he said, right before he closed the distance between us and kissed me senseless.
***
The following day, I walked down the stadium hallway to meet with Coach Hoffman. He was my main point of contact for the Seattle Stars. I’d come to respect him deeply for his hands on involvement with his players and their lives. I’d seen him go to lengths to instill values in his players if he thought they were lacking. I’d been leery of accepting this retainer offer, in part because I didn’t want to be anyone’s lackey. There were more examples than I could count of professional sports players who were complete assholes who got off the hook legally because the wheels of justice were greased with cash and sleight of hand representation. Coach Hoffman didn’t expect that of me.
As such, I wasn’t feeling too great to stumble the way I had with Ethan. To be fair, Ethan could likely sweep any woman off her feet. It’s just I’d thought I had more discipline, and I’d let things get away from me. I’d already handed his case over to another attorney, who was happy to take over. Jana assured me she’d spun it that I was too busy down with other matters to handle it with the white gloves it needed.
I reached Coach Hoffman’s door and rapped my knuckles lightly on it. When he called for me to come in, I stepped inside, glancing to him where he sat behind his desk.
“Should I close the door?” I asked.
At his nod, I closed the door and went to sit down when he gestured to the chair across from him. He finished a phone call and spun to face me.