When Scott took a different turn away from their usual restaurant, Megan sat straighter. “Where are we going?”
Scott grinned. “Somewhere special. To a place made for tonight and for the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”
With just a few words spoken, Scott’s love enveloped her. Why couldn’t Scott have come into her life ten years ago? But what of Randy? While her relationship with Jason was a mistake, Randy was not. He was the only thing right in the mess of her life.
Scott took a left at the next intersection and another into the restaurant’s parking lot. Megan stared at the three-story building that resembled an old Colonial plantation house. An upper deck ran the length of the building with tables set on it in the fashion of a sidewalk cafe. Floor to ceiling French doors and windows covered the lower front with a large fountain in the center.
“Wow.” Megan looked around. She’d driven past before, but never ventured in. “Where’s the guy who parks cars?”
Scott laughed and opened his door. “Sorry, I couldn’t afford him.”
“I won’t have to wash dishes before the night’s over, will I?” Megan slid under the steering wheel and out of the truck.
“If you do, you’ll be washing them alone because I don’t plan to.” Scott locked his truck and put his arm around Megan’s shoulders as they walked toward the building.
She pulled back. “I refuse to do dishes for your meal.”
Scott laughed and pulled her closer. He dipped his head and spoke close to her ear. “I love you, Megan. You won’t be washing dishes.”
The restaurant held several dining rooms. Their hostess took them to one with square wooden tables for four sitting haphazardly on a gleaming wood ingrained floor. Pale peach walls surrounded the large room and white pillars placed about twenty feet apart separated them from the adjoining dining room. A curved stairway rose to the floor above. Megan tried to keep from staring. She already felt like a country bumpkin. There was no reason to make the hostess think the same thing.
Megan ordered a shrimp dinner while Scott asked for steak. When their food arrived, Scott took Megan’s hand in his and bowed his head. After he offered a short prayer, they ate in silence.
Megan swallowed. “This is very good. The prices aren’t as high as I expected, either.”
Scott shook his head. “I knew I should have asked for a guest menu. Haven’t you ever heard the expression you aren’t supposed to look a gift horse in the mouth?”
Megan smiled. “I couldn’t very well help but see the prices.”
“Did you know there’s a garden out back? When we finish here maybe we could take a little walk. What do you think?”
“It sounds wonderful.” Megan speared the last shrimp and bit into it, relishing the buttery flavor as she chewed.
After they ate, Megan went with Scott through the back door. He slipped his arm around her waist as they stepped onto a cinder block patio with two paths leading from it on each side.
Megan looked up into Scott’s loving gaze. The longer she knew Scott the more her love for him grew. Would it always be that way? Five years from now would their love be even stronger? And what of fifty years? Her fantasy came to a screeching halt. There would be no fifty years for her and Scott. Only marriage could give them so many years together, and they couldn’t marry because as soon as Scott knew her secret, he would run as far from her as he could, taking Randy with him.
Megan shoved her dark thoughts aside and concentrated on the beautiful garden. Rocks with tiny lights shining between them lined either side of the paths and stood guard for the flowerbeds. Placed at intervals, old-fashioned lampposts served as centerpieces for the lush plantings while they cast a warm glow over the garden. A couple of benches on the patio invited them to sit and enjoy the foliage and colorful flowers. But Scott had a different idea.
He took her hand in his, tugging her away from the bench. “Let’s see what’s at the end of this path.”
As the path curved, another couple met them and moved toward the restaurant with scarcely a glance their way. Few people strolled in the garden. The darkness of the evening became a cover with the soft lights creating an aura of romance. The warmth of Scott’s hand in hers gave her comfort, and she never wanted to let go. She’d entered a fairy tale, and Scott was her Prince Charming. She loved him with an everlasting love, and his love for her was just as strong.
They came to a large pool of sparkling water held in place by layers of flat rock. Water plants drifted around the edge. An arched wooden bridge crossed the pool. Scott led Megan to the middle of the bridge and stopped, pulling her close to his side. She leaned her head against his shoulder, and he shifted, bringing her in front of him for a kiss.
Moments later, they looked into the pool where a reflection of the full moon rode the surface of the water.
“This is so perfect, Scott. Thank you.” Megan looked into his eyes and saw her own love mirrored there.
“I love you, Megan.” Scott lifted her shoulder-length hair and let it sift through his fingers. “Till death do us part.”
Her breath caught and held.
The half-smile that always melted her heart, lifted one corner of his mouth. “Megan, will you marry me?”
Megan stared at Scott. Her heart raced with a love so vibrant and alive she could scarcely contain it. Would she marry Scott? Yes! A thousand times, yes!
No. She couldn’t. Randy’s image came before her as an effective dash of cold water. When she first realized Randy was her son, she thought marriage to Scott would solve her problems. How simple it would be to adopt Randy, and no one would ever know he was already hers by birth. But her love for Scott had grown until now she couldn’t marry him under false pretenses. She’d have to tell him the truth. And she’d lose him.
Scott would never have come near her if he’d known she was Randy’s birthmother. Even now, his love for her wouldn’t withstand such a revelation. She couldn’t tell him who she was because she would lose both Scott and Randy. Now with his proposal waiting, whatever she did would drive a wedge between them.
Her eyes filled with tears as her heart broke. Scott’s smile disappeared. Fear and confusion settled in his eyes. “Megan, please....” His voice cracked.
“No, Scott. Don’t ask me. I can’t.”
“Megan, you love me. I know you do.”
She started away, but he caught her. “Don’t turn away.” He pulled her close and held her while her tears soaked his shirt. His special scent surrounded her, soothing her, drawing her. His voice, soft and loving rumbled in her ears. “Please, Megan, I love you. Tell me what’s wrong, and I’ll fix it.”
She pushed back. “No, Scott, you don’t understand. You can’t. I can’t marry you. I won’t.”
The lines of his face hardened. He stared into her eyes until she looked away. “Is that your final word?”
A sob choked her answer. She nodded to emphasize the one word. “Yes.”
~Sixteen~
Scott stared after Megan’s retreating form. A fog of disbelief settled around him. What just happened? Pain started in the hard, slow beat of his heart. She said no. It was over.
But it couldn’t be. Maybe she hadn’t understood. He started after her, lengthening his strides to catch up before she reached the restaurant. At the door leading inside, he took her arm. A shudder coursed through her body at his touch.
“Megan, slow down. I don’t understand what’s going on. I’ll take you home and let you think about my proposal. I meant everything I said. I love you like I’ve never loved another woman. I’ll always love you.”
“Why can’t we continue like we are? We don’t have to change things.” Tears shimmered on her lashes. Her eyes were dark with the pain he felt.
A ragged sigh tore from Scott’s throat at Megan’s words. How could he leave things the way they were? He wanted commitment, permanence. He wanted to grow old with her. To have children together. Randy needed a mother. Scott sucked in a breath.
>
“Is it Randy?”
Megan’s arm tensed under his fingers. He’d hit a nerve. “I thought you and Randy were great friends.”
“Of course, we are.” Megan’s smile didn’t dry the tears in her eyes. “You know I love Randy.”
She yanked the door open, leaving Scott no choice but to follow. In the truck, she huddled against her door. Scott drove in the silence, his confusion changing to anger. He’d planned this evening for weeks, wanting the perfect setting for his proposal. A proposal he’d expected to be accepted. The small jewelers’ box in his suit pocket felt heavy against his thigh as if it weighed a ton. Thankfully, he hadn’t taken it out before he had her answer. A man could only take so much rejection.
He glanced at Megan. She rested against the back of the seat with her eyes closed. Her face looked drawn as if she carried a burden too heavy for her frail shoulders. Moisture clung to the dark lashes against her pale cheeks. A silent tear slid from one eye. Why couldn’t she share her concerns with him? Surely, together they could work it out. That’s what marriage was about. Two people who loved each other, standing together against life’s hurts. But she didn’t want to marry him. Hurt, confusion, and anger warred in his heart against the love that wouldn’t stop.
Scott walked Megan to her door then went home to an empty house and fell across his bed. Randy was spending the night with Derek, but Randy wasn’t the one he missed.
~*~
Scott took a shower, ate a couple of slices of toast with his morning coffee, and went through the motions of living. What was the use? He’d loved twice and lost both times. He lost Carol to death after three short years of marriage. Megan had never been his, or he wouldn’t have lost her. How could he have been so stupid to think she might love him? To think she’d want to marry him?
He slammed out of the house and climbed into the cab of his truck. Maybe he and Randy should leave. School was out. They could take a vacation. Go see his folks in Iowa. Maybe spend the day in Columbia looking for a house to rent.
Scott drove across town while his mind churned with possibilities. At the moment it didn’t matter what he did or where he went. He parked in front of Joe and Shelly’s house and went to the door. It opened almost immediately.
“Hi, come on in.” Shelly’s warm smile faltered as her eyebrows lifted. “What’s wrong?”
Was he that transparent? He looked away. “Nothing. Is Randy here?”
“He’s out in back with Derek and Cody. Why don’t you sit down for a minute and tell me what my sister did?”
How’d she know? Scott focused on her face and saw compassion. A soft smile touched her lips. “Did she dump you?”
A hollow laugh jumped from Scott’s throat. “Actually, no. She wants everything to continue just as it is.”
Without conscious thought, he sat on the sofa beside Shelly and told her about the fiasco of his proposal and Megan’s rejection.
“She loves you,” Shelly said.
“You couldn’t prove it by last night.”
Shelly looked down at her hands as if she were deep in thought. When she looked up, the intensity of her gaze frightened Scott. “I’m going to tell you something Megan doesn’t want you to know. But being the interfering big sister I am, I think you need to know—at least the bare-bone facts.”
Scott shrugged. Shelly couldn’t tell him anything that would make a difference. Megan made her choice. She didn’t want him. She obviously didn’t love him as much as she said or as much as he'd thought.
“Megan got pregnant in college. She wanted to keep her baby as the father moved on with his life and wanted no part of either of them. But to do so, she’d lose her scholarship and have to drop out of college because she had no support. Our mother refused to help her and when the baby was born, I couldn’t help either. I’d just had Derek, and my husband had died only days before. I was in no emotional condition to take on another baby.”
Scott tried to take in Shelly’s words, but only one thing stood out. Megan had a child.
Shelly sighed. “In the end, Megan signed the papers giving her baby to a young Christian couple who couldn’t have children. That’s all she knew.”
Shelly leaned toward Scott, making eye contact. “Megan thinks Randy is her son. She’s afraid she’ll lose him again.”
Scott sat in stunned silence and stared at Shelly. Disbelief stole his ability to think. He ran Shelly’s words through his mind again and decided he’d heard right. His heart pounded. The implication reached beyond his imagination. He shook his head. “I don’t understand. Why would she think Randy is her son?”
Shelly checked the reasons off on her fingers. “He’s adopted. His coloring is right. Haven’t you noticed how much he looks like her?”
No, he never considered it, but now he pictured Randy and Megan together in his mind. He didn’t like the implication. No wonder he thought she’d make such a good mother for his son.
Shelly touched one finger after another. “He wants to be a doctor. Megan’s boyfriend was going to medical school. You’re good friends with the lawyer who placed her baby. Probably the kicker is her baby was born in August.”
Scott couldn’t speak. He couldn’t think. The blood washed from his head, leaving him weak, and then rushed back with the burning heat of vengeance. He stood and in two steps reached the door.
“Scott, wait. I wanted to ask you when Randy’s—”
Scott scarcely heard her voice for the roaring between his ears. He shook his head. “Not now, Shelly, okay? I’ve got to get out of here. I’ll wait in the truck for Randy. Please send him out.” He barely registered the compassion in her eyes as she nodded.
He’d been kicked in the gut. Twice within twenty-four hours. How much could a man take? Megan wanted Randy, not him. All this time he thought she loved him as much as he loved her. And he did love her. In spite of everything, he loved her and always would.
Megan played him for a fool. She’d used him to get close to Randy. No more. He wouldn’t stand by and let her walk all over him. He fumed silently as he drove across town with Randy chattering about the fun he’d had with Derek and Cody. He pulled into the driveway and stopped.
“Randy.” He broke into his son’s monologue he hadn’t heard.
“Yeah, Dad?”
“How would you like to go to Columbia today?”
Randy shrugged. “Sure. Right now?”
Scott nodded. “Yeah, the sooner the better.” Because the sooner he found another house, the sooner he’d get away from Megan.
~*~
Scott’s truck pulled away from Shelly’s house, so Megan stopped at the side of the street and waited. He drove away, and she breathed again. Surely, he hadn’t seen her. Nothing would ever be the same between them. Tears blurred her eyes, and she swiped them away in irritation. She’d cried enough last night to drain her tear ducts. She wouldn’t start again. Prayer and tears. What good had they been? Her burden remained heavy. She’d lost her son nine years ago. Was she to lose him all over again?
She parked in the driveway and knocked before opening the door and slipping inside. “Shelly, are you here?”
“I’m in the kitchen. Come on back.” Shelly turned from the sink and took in Megan’s appearance. “You want to tell me about it?”
Shelly pulled a couple of chairs out from the table and sat down. “I’m ready to listen.”
Megan took the offered chair. She hated the sympathy in her sister’s eyes but took a deep breath and began. “I’ve lost Randy. And Scott, too.”
“Why?”
“Scott asked me to marry him. I turned him down.” Megan clenched her hands in her lap. “I can’t marry him and not tell him the truth about Randy.”
“I thought you loved Scott.”
“I do love Scott. But can’t you see? If I tell him about Randy, I’ll lose him and Randy, too. Now I’ve lost them, anyway.”
“Megan, he knows.” Shelly placed a gentle hand on her sister’s arm. “He was jus
t here, and I told him.”
“You told him?” Megan’s voice rose in disbelief. She jumped to her feet and paced a few steps away. “How could you?”
Shelly sat back in her chair. “I thought it would help to get everything out into the open. He thinks you don’t love him.”
“And he’s sure of it now.” Megan shook her head to clear the jumbled thoughts inside. “I can’t believe you would do that.”
She crossed her arms and glared at her sister. Anger pulsed through her but was quickly replaced by defeat. She didn’t have the energy to fight with Shelly. “Not that it matters. I suppose. He’s going to believe what he wants, anyway. Besides, after last night everything’s changed. He hates me.”
“He doesn't hate you. Right now he's hurting as much as you are.”
“I don't think so, Shelly.” Megan shook her head and sank back into the chair, bowing her head. “No one else could hurt this much. And he has Randy.”
Shelly sighed. “You need to find out the exact day Randy was born. I tried to ask Scott, but he cut me off and left. I didn't have time to ask Randy.”
Megan stood and headed toward the door. She couldn’t listen to any more. “Don’t bother. It’s obvious who Randy is. He was born to me, but he’s Scott’s son thanks to Mother.”
She barely heard Shelly’s voice over the resentment in her soul. “Oh, Megan.”
Megan drove home while one thought after another chased through her mind. Randy was her son. Why wouldn’t Shelly believe her? Now she’d lost him again, and resentment toward her mother almost stifled her. Deep in her heart, she knew the fight with her mother had gone on way too long. But how did one stop the pain, the feeling of abandonment, and antagonism that came with the memories? Her mother refused to help her when she needed help the most. She’d taken Shelly and Derek in without a whimper. Megan was obviously not worth her time and effort.
She’d never resented Shelly or Derek for receiving the assistance from their mother she felt she should have gotten. Shelly needed help after Brent’s death and Derek’s birth even more than she did. But their mother never intended to help Megan, so there’d been no choice between daughters in her decision. For that, Megan found forgiveness hard.
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