by AJ Rose
“Char?”
“I need light,” she hollered. Riley ran to the table and scurried to his mother’s tent with the heavy duty flashlight.
Ash grabbed it and trained it on his sister, hunched over Russ with her hand on his neck, frantically searching for a pulse. After a moment, she looked at him, helpless.
“I can’t find one.”
“Try his wrist.”
She did, and then hung her head, shifting her grip to hold her boyfriend’s hand. When she looked up again, her eyes were wet, and she could only shake her head.
“Fuck,” he muttered, heedless of his nephew standing beside him.
“What?” Riley asked.
Charlotte crab-walked out of the tent and stumbled to the edge of their clearing, her shoulders shaking as she hugged herself in the chill, which had crept up since sunset. Riley watched her go and then turned his questioning face to Ash.
“Russ took a hit to his head last night, buddy.” He tried to answer with a smooth voice, leading the boy away from the tent. “Sometimes, someone looks okay after a knock on the head, but they might be more hurt than first thought.”
“You mean like a seizure or something?”
“What do you know about those?” Ash asked.
“I know Elliot has them. I heard you guys talking the other night. And Mom said Russ had one this afternoon.”
“Kind of. We don’t know what was actually wrong with Russ, but his injury must have been worse than we thought.” He swallowed, Riley’s scared eyes beginning to show his understanding.
“He’s going to be okay, though, right? I mean, he kind of acts like I’m dumb sometimes, but he’s the best of all the guys Mom’s dated.”
Ash crouched in front of the boy, keeping the light off their faces and pointed up so there wouldn’t be any sinister shadows on them.
“No, Riley. Russ isn’t going to be okay. We couldn’t take him to a doctor. He fell asleep and isn’t going to wake up.” Ash looked around for help, but Charlotte was on her knees in the sparse grass at the edge of the trees, and Brian and Elliot stood by the fire looking horribly uncomfortable and clearly not sure of their place in this moment. Ash was on his own.
Riley’s eyes filled with tears, and his chin wobbled. “He’s dead?”
Ash swallowed. “I’m sorry.” Shit, he’d been trying to make the trip seem like fun for the kid so he wouldn’t realize how dangerous it was, but the circumstances of their departure, and now this, made that impossible.
“Uncle Ash,” Riley moaned, clearly unable to process the information. Ash tightened his arms around the boy’s frail, heaving shoulders and made soothing noises. “I thought we were just going camping,” Riley moaned, hiccupping with the strength of his sobs and the last word wailing from his thin little body.
“We are, buddy. But here’s the thing, and it’s the truth. You know how your house didn’t have power?”
“Yeah.” Riley wiped his nose on Ash’s t-shirt.
“Well, a lot more people than we first thought don’t have power either. So it’s going to be hard to find things like doctors and batteries and stuff. I’ve packed a lot of what we’ll need in the van, like the tents and food and water and bandages, but we’re going to have to get used to living different than before. At least for a few days while we’re driving across the country. No McDonald’s, and you better watch how much you play your 3DS, okay? We can’t charge it back up.” Riley’s shaking didn’t abate, but he didn’t say anything. Ash’s chest hurt with the reassurances he couldn’t give the boy but so desperately wanted to. “Hey,” he said, bringing Riley to arm’s length. “I’m not going to let anything happen to us, okay? I promise. We’re going to sleep in a tent every night, do a lot of fishing, and during the day, we’ll keep going to Uncle Marvin’s house in Washington. Once we get there, things will be easier. He has power. I just called him, and he said he’s looking forward to seeing us. So you’re gonna have to trust me. I’ll get us there. No matter what.”
Riley sniffed and swiped the back of his hand across his nose, clearly trying to get it together. Ash hated that at Riley’s age, he’d be learning what true danger meant. “Okay,” was all he said.
“So make sure you listen to me when I tell you to do something, all right? I’m gonna need your help, buddy. We all need to be each other’s best friends and help out where we can. You’ve been doing great with getting the camp set up and grabbing the flashlight for your mom and giving a hand with dinner. I need you to keep on doing that, okay?”
Riley nodded. Ash let him fall back to his chest and cling, though his crying had mostly subsided.
After a moment, his thin, high-pitched voice wafted out of Ash’s t-shirt. “What do we do about Russ? We have to bury him, right?”
Ash frowned. What were they going to do about Russ? They didn’t have anything they could use to dig a grave, and he seriously doubted Charlotte would be okay simply leaving his body behind.
“I’ll think of something, okay?” he said, stroking the back of Riley’s head. “We’ll say goodbye the right way.” They stayed like that for a moment, then Riley pulled away. “Can you do me a favor and take my plate down to the beach, rinse it off? We can’t clean it in the fish tub, and the river water should be good enough. Take the flashlight with you.”
Elliot met Ash’s eyes, then followed the boy so he wouldn’t be near the water in the dark by himself. Ash stalked over to Brian and mumbled, trying to keep his voice low enough for Charlotte not to hear. “What do we do with his body?”
“Have you got something in the van to wrap him in?”
Ash considered, then remembered Charlotte kept an old blanket in there to sit on when Riley had soccer games or wanted to spend the day at the park. He’d left it in case they needed it on chilly nights, but given they had warm sleeping bags, it wasn’t likely they’d miss it.
“Yeah.”
“Then we’ll wrap him up and take him into town. If you don’t want to go to the hospital in case they’re overrun, we can find a funeral home and leave him there. Or we can hit a hardware store and get the supplies we’d need to bury him ourselves.”
Ash tried not to shudder. “That’ll take all damn night, and we honestly would need more than a couple shovels.”
“Maybe we should see what Charlotte wants to do,” Elliot said, coming to stand on Ash’s other side, setting the clean plate on the table. He surreptitiously let his knuckles brush the back of Ash’s hand, and Ash gave in to the urge to grab on. It was fleeting, only a second to squeeze and let go, but it shored him up.
Riley had gone to his mother, leaning over her back with his arms around her neck. Ash would have expected him to curl up in her lap, seeking her comfort rather than trying to give his own. Sadness deeper than Ash had known since his parents’ deaths settled in the pit of his stomach, cold and barbed like frozen razor wire. They’d once been a team, the three of them, and he’d left them to go off to college, knowing it would be better for all of them when he got out, but he still felt like he’d abandoned them, and now, when they needed him most, he was an outsider.
“Let’s give them a few minutes.” He stalked to the van to snag the blanket, trying to collect his thoughts. Day one on the road, and they’d already suffered the loss of one of their group. Some protector he was.
“If it weren’t for you, we wouldn’t have made it out of Charlotte’s house, and there’d be more than one person to bury,” Elliot said behind him, causing him to jump and bump his head on the open back door. He turned to glare, but it lost its potency in the dimness of the weak overhead vehicle light. He slammed the door, plunging them into darkness.
“Doesn’t make it feel any better,” he muttered.
“I know you saved her, and that boy is saying goodbye to one of several father figures in his life, none of whom are as important to him as she is. Or you are.” Elliot stepped closer, eyeing him seriously as he put a hand on Ash’s shoulder and slid it up the side of his neck. “I
know you saved me, too,” he nearly whispered.
Ash snorted. “From what?” It was dismissive, but his stomach was in knots, and this guy didn’t know him well enough to put him on such a pedestal.
Maybe you just don’t want the pedestal because everyone you’ve ever put on one has fallen off spectacularly.
Elliot shrugged and looked away. “You can’t take a compliment, can you?”
Ash shifted, torn between trying to get Elliot to step out of his personal space and dropping the blanket to wrap his arms around his lanky frame. All he did was sniff. “Nothing to compliment.”
A wry smile was barely visible on Elliot’s lips. “No, you just have the brains to have gotten your family and me and Brian out of a horrible situation—”
“And into another one,” Ash interrupted.
“With our lives intact and a better chance than we’d have had otherwise.” Elliot blinked owlishly behind his glasses, getting even closer.
“Who are you and what have you done with the guy who had a panic attack on the side of a highway?” he asked, fighting the ironic twist of his lips. The nervous guy who’d demanded Ash pull his car over was nowhere in evidence. Regarding him critically, Ash could see how well Elliot had been adapting to their new situation, and if anyone had asked him a week ago, he’d have said Elliot wasn’t capable of that much self-composure. Maybe it was because Elliot had dealt with his father, or because Brian had shown up and he had someone he trusted.
Or maybe he’s seeing more to me than I can live up to.
“Someone told him to stand by his decisions, because if he doesn’t, he won’t make it far in this new life.”
This new side of him was intriguing, which made the razor wire in Ash’s gut unwind a little more, pressing sharp points into his insides.
“Ask Russ how he feels about me being a hero,” he bit out and started to move away. Elliot cupped his jaw, stopping him.
“We’re all out of our element here. You’re the most prepared, but it’s okay if you’re afraid, Ash. It doesn’t make you less of a man if the end of the world as we know it scares the shit out of you. It makes you normal. Human, even.”
The razor wire eased, and he took a deep breath, the crisp, unpolluted air a balm to his lungs. Elliot hadn’t judged him when he’d tossed his cookies after learning the extent of the disaster, and he didn’t appear to be judging now. If anything, Ash was his own worst critic. As usual.
“Thanks,” he said softly, suddenly in no hurry to return to the group and the unpleasant task of deciding how to treat Russ’s remains. “You know, I wasn’t sure about asking you to come along. I was afraid you’d be a bigger pain in the ass than you’ve turned out to be.” He grinned to show he was half-teasing.
“Gee, thanks,” Elliot chuckled, solidly meeting Ash’s eyes.
“I’m sorry I underestimated you,” Ash finished, pushing aside his discomfort at the truthfulness. Like Elliot had said, if this wasn’t a situation in which to be real and honest, there wasn’t one. Ash was aware enough of how life turned on a dime that he didn’t want to waste time on the useless effort of his asshole armor. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me, too,” Elliot said, his voice suddenly husky. “And not just because I’d probably be worm food if I’d stayed in the city.” They stared at one another for a long moment, and Elliot looked away first. “We should see how Charlotte wants to handle this. If she’s up for deciding, that is.”
“Yeah,” Ash said, watching as Elliot began to walk back. He followed, blanket clutched against his chest, which wasn’t as empty as it had been moments before.
Charlotte had managed to compose herself and was standing near the campfire and looking up when he walked into the circle of light cast by the flames. He went to her and wrapped her in his arms, the blanket tossed unceremoniously on the picnic table bench. She allowed the hug long enough to convey her gratitude for his concern, then pulled away, staring absently at the fire.
“We can’t just leave him out here,” she said, voice clogged with emotion.
“No,” he agreed.
“So we get him into town. Take him to the hospital. Surely they’ve got other sick and injured people who didn’t make it, so they’ll know what to do. They can… put him with the rest, maybe.”
Ash cringed, not wanting to go near a hospital. That was why they had avoided it in the first place, since he figured the hospitals were either overrun or without power, the staff possibly absent but definitely overwhelmed if they were there. But in light of the situation, he didn’t argue. If it made Charlotte feel better to know Russ would be taken care of in this way, who was he to say no?
“Okay. Why don’t you take Riley somewhere so we can get Russ in the van? Elliot and Brian can stay behind while we go into town and see what we can do.”
“I don’t think we should split up again,” Brian said cautiously as Charlotte took Riley away from camp.
Ash’s shoulders hunched. “I don’t want to leave our stuff unattended. Someone has to stay back.”
“What happens if you’re caught up in a mob at the hospital?” Elliot asked worriedly.
“There’s no one here, Ash,” Brian said matter-of-factly. “Who’s going to steal anything?”
“No,” he said, putting his foot down. “One person stays back or none of us go.”
Elliot sighed. “I’ll stay. I’m not much use in a fight if things turn ugly. I’d have much better luck defending camp than fighting a crowd.”
Ash didn’t like it. He’d intended for Brian to stay behind but wasn’t sure how to say he’d rather have Elliot with him. Bigger man or not, Brian wasn’t the one Ash was more comfortable with.
“Can you shoot a gun?” he asked them.
Elliot gave a small shake of his head while Brian grunted in the affirmative.
“Then Elliot, you come with me, and Brian can hold down the fort here. Not just people in this forest to watch for.”
He knew the logic was solid, but he still tried to keep the relief from his face when they agreed. Brian did help him get Russ wrapped in the blanket and into the back of the van. Ash called for his sister and nephew then, and they climbed somberly into the van. Ash considered the wisdom of taking the boy, but ultimately, the kid deserved the chance to say goodbye. They could only shield him so much. Elliot offered Charlotte the front, but she shook her head and stayed close to her son, her expression dazed.
After twenty minutes on the winding roads exiting the park with nothing but silence and the hum of the tires on the pavement, Elliot picked up his iPod and played soft piano music. Ash had to give him credit; the selections he made were respectful and low-key, and soothing in a way no words could ever be. Soon there were quiet sniffles in the back, and when he looked in the rearview mirror, he saw Riley had curled up in his mother’s lap after all. She petted him rhythmically and brushed the tears from his cheeks, kissing his forehead over and over.
Upon entering the town of Warren once more, Ash saw the blue road sign with the H on it and followed the arrow to Warren Township Hospital. He was encouraged to see a lone bulb lit in the covered drive to the emergency entrance, which meant the building’s generator was still working. Surprisingly, there was very little activity when they walked in. The electric doors didn’t whoosh open, but there were manually operated doors to the side they were able to enter through, and Ash was gobsmacked to see a lone figure sitting behind the check-in desk.
The middle-aged woman looked up at them, almost startled to see someone in the otherwise deserted entry. “Can I help you?” she asked.
“Yeah,” he said, clearing his throat awkwardly. “My sister’s boyfriend… had an accident last night. He seemed okay for most of today, but he lay down for a nap and….” Ash wasn’t sure he could get the words out in front of Charlotte, but there wasn’t a choice. As much as he wanted to protect her from this situation, shielding her too much wasn’t going to make matters better either. Besides, it’s not like she didn�
�t know Russ was dead. “He didn’t wake up.”
The woman’s face compressed in sympathy. “One moment, dears,” she said, then picked up a two-way radio to call for assistance at the ER entrance. Two young guys in scrubs and white coats showed a few minutes later, wheeling a gurney.
“Lead the way, sir,” one of them said efficiently.
This is too normal, he thought. What’s the catch?
Numbly, Charlotte led them to the van, lifting the back door. Riley popped up to peer over the backrest with saddened, red eyes. The men paused, then got into position to transfer Russ’s form to the gurney, leaving his blanket shroud in place.
“What happened, ma’am?” the other one asked as they followed the gurney into the building, its air stagnant from lack of movement. The heavy oppressive smell of antiseptic was worse now that Ash realized the vents weren’t circulating. He half expected to see a layer of thick fog along the floor where the heavy aroma seemed to settle most.
“We were attacked last night,” Charlotte said, glaring at Ash. He looked at her intently, trying to warn her off the truth with his eyes, but she lifted her chin defiantly. “We had to leave my house afterward because the guy who broke in could have had friends nearby. So we got in the car and left. Russ seemed okay, if kind of tired, but it was the middle of the night. We drove as far away as we dared and then decided to stop and rest for the day.” She hesitated, and Ash was grateful when she left out where they’d stopped. “He lay down for a bit, still kind of out of it. A few hours later, I checked on him, and he didn’t have a pulse.”
“What happened to him in the attack?” the shorter of the two guys asked as the other one maneuvered the gurney into a curtained bay inside a totally empty ER.
“We figured out he was hit by a baseball bat,” she said, tearing up again. “At least, that’s what was on the floor by his side of the bed.”
“What happened then?”