Pulling out some containers of food the lady at the store suggested, I nervously watch her as I open them.
“Here we have ham and cheese rollup sandwiches,” I say, opening the first container. After setting it aside, I open the second. “And here is some fresh fruit, pineapple, strawberries, grapes … that kind of stuff.” Opening the third container, I add, “And here, I did my best attempt at what you might like for dessert. I stumbled across some store while in Auburn today and stopped in. I hope you like fudge or English toffee?”
Grabbing some toffee and taking a bite, she smiles up at me as she says, “Its perfect.”
Pulling a bottle of wine from my backpack and a few cups, I say, “I did my best to pick you out a nice red. That was what you were drinking the other night, right?”
“Very good. I’m impressed,” she says, taking the cup. “None for you?” she asks as I don’t pour myself a drink.
I pull out a flask. “Kentucky bourbon.” I wink at her. “Sure to warm you right up.”
“Got enough to share,” she asks.
Surprised I hand her the flask. She stares at it momentarily before tilting it back and taking a swig. Her face tightens slightly before she opens her eyes and looks back at me.
“That’s good,” she says licking her lips.
I smile brighter, “I’m glad you like it.”
She tilts it back again before handing it back.
“I could get hooked on that stuff,” she chokes out. The second swig clearly a little bigger and stronger than the first.
“Ninety-five percent of the world’s bourbon comes out of Kentucky,” I say. “If you ever come out my way, trust me you will be in no short supply.”
Smiling, she makes my heart race faster as she replies, “Maybe I will just have to come out that way then. Let you show me around and see what the Bluegrass state is all about.”
She has no idea. I would love to take her home and show her my world. Although I doubt she would ever want to leave California and the home and life she has built for herself here. Maybe I could convince her to take a trip back with me if whatever is happening between us goes much further, but even then, I’m risking more heartache when she would eventually leave, so there is no point to even go there.
As the night wears on, we spend the good part of the next hour or so talking, laughing and listening to each others stories about childhood. We joke about the differences not only between Northern and Southern California, but the West Coast and the South; and eventually I notice something about Evelyn which makes me want to gamble just one more time in my life on this crazy and sometimes stupid thing they call love. Maybe she will be different. Maybe whatever this is between us, given the right chance could work. Maybe, just maybe, it’s worth a try.
After we’ve talked and had our share of food and drink, I watch as she gets down from the tailgate and wraps the blanket around herself tightly. She turns and faces me, smiling mischievously, the bourbon obviously giving her a new found confidence. Taking slow steps towards me, she comes to a stop in between the middle of my legs. My heart races, wondering what she’s up to now.
She says nothing, just looks into my eyes, smiling at me and waiting. For what, I have no clue. An invitation of sorts? Hell, she needs no invitation. I am always wanting to hold her, touch her, feel her, be anywhere near her. She leans in, teasing me, and then backs away before I can close the distance.
I reach up and brush a few strands of hair out of her face, watching as she leans her head into my hand, only extending the time I take to touch her. This, right here, is the moment I feel time pause. I stare at her, knowing that I need to make a decision. I’m not someone to inch into the swimming pool. I always choose to dive in headfirst. And right now, I need to decide if my heart is strong enough to take the plunge again, because Lord knows if I ever do, I want it to be with her.
Somewhere between kissing her in that bar the first night we met and this moment, I know I have lost any will to guard myself. Taking this brief second, I wait. As much as I know my heart might not be strong enough to drown in love, I suddenly know as long as it’s her love killing me slowly, it won’t even matter. I know it would never feel right letting her go. She completes me.
The only future I want to see now has to have her in it. To hell with my past and swearing off love. Being with her gives me life, and my life would be dull if I ever had to walk a day without her by my side again. I just hope that she feels the same way, or could grow to in time.
“I don’t want to be without you, Evelyn,” I confess in a whisper. “I’m not sure how or when that happened, but something about you captivates me. Once you walked into my life, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. You consume me.”
Giving up and caving in, I close the distance between the two of us and kiss her before she has a chance to pull away. I have to have her. I have to taste her. I have to feel her against me to ease my nerves and calm the madness and doubt ragging in my head.
When I’m with her like this, there is peace. When we are together, I know I don’t need anything else in the world.
She pulls back, and I do my best to resist, kissing her harder and pulling her back into me. Giggling, she finally breaks free.
“What? You think you can just say something like that then kiss me senseless and I am not supposed to say anything,” she asks.
“I think we were just talking better than words could ever express,” I say, pulling her in and going for her neck. Kissing her softly a few times, I see her skin prickle with goose bumps. I smile against her skin and continue my assault on her body, pulling her shirt off her shoulder, kissing and nibbling my way across her collarbone.
She moans into me. “You’re making me loose what I was about to say.”
“Good,” I manage through kisses as I start to pull at the hem of her shirt, lifting it slightly under the blanket when she stops me and pulls away completely.
“Noah, whatever your middle name is, Stewart!” she says, flustered and slightly upset.
“Ryan,” I say, smiling back at her and pulling her closer again. Flustered and playfully upset works for her and does nothing to stop the need building inside me to have her.
She falls back against me, giving up and falling into the pull we have on each other.
“Don’t you want to hear what I have to say,” she asks, pushing out her bottom lip in a pout.
Grabbing her ass forcefully, I lift her as she wraps both legs around me. Her blanket rests on the tailgate of my truck.
Leaning my head against hers, I watch as her eyes cloud with desire when, I say, “No. I want you to show me!”
Evelyn
“And then what happened,” Gwen asks, wide eyed, as she sits on the edge of the couch.
It’s 2:30 in the morning, and we have been rehashing my night with Noah ever since I arrived home about an hour ago. Ever the night owl, I wasn’t surprised when I came home to find her on the couch, still watching some late-night infomercials. She has a strange addiction to home shopping networks, always buying what others only think of buying before they come to their senses. I know deep down it’s because she never sleeps well. She’s had sleeping issues since her sister’s death.
“He drove me home and walked me to the door,” I answer, trying to give away the least amount of information I can.
“And …” she pries.
“And what?” I say, dodging the obvious.
She eyes me but I don’t cave. I just let my smile widen, knowing all the toe-curling details and not giving up any of them.
“Come on!” she yells, chucking a pillow at me from across the couch.
Laughing, I throw it back at her while I take the time to choose my words wisely. “Let’s just say, it took every ounce of my will power not to pull that man in here and finish what we started.” I blush.
“That’s it! He didn’t even try to get to home base? Geez, what kind of guy is he?”
“A rare breed, I gue
ss,” I answer. “I believe they used to call them gentlemen. He pushed a hard second base though!”
“I’d have more respect for him if he at least made it to third!” she exclaims. “Maybe he’s gay!”
I laugh as I stand from the couch to make my way down the hallway to bed. “I can assure you that he most definitely is not.”
“I’m not sure of anything yet until you come home barely able to walk, the verdict is still out on boat man,” she yells after me.
Shaking my head, I slip out of my clothes and into a night gown. Normally never forgoing a shower, I decide to wait a few more hours since my skin still smells like him. Crawling into bed, still buzzing from Noah and the bourbon, I let my mind remember all the events of the evening, still feeling his touch lingering on my skin as we lay in the bed of his truck for hours exploring each other with such a carnal need.
I’m as surprised as Gwen is that he did not try and take advantage of the situation. Being respected that way makes me want him even more. Knowing that he didn’t push for his needs but respected mine instead makes me want to give. He pushed as far as I did and never asked to take it any further. I know full well the need he had though as he pushed me up against the door at the end of the night, barley able to pull himself away from me as we tried our best to satisfy an appetite I’m most certain will never be sated. I felt the same need as we hungrily felt every inch of each other, breathing one another in and memorizing as much as possible … as if we would never be together again.
Watching him leave was torture, and I stood there for a few moments, regaining my composure from the mind-blowing evening before walking inside. Never has a man been able to make me feel the way that Noah does.
When I stand next to him, I grow tingly and numb. The chemistry swirls in a force so strong I can barely think. The draw to touch him can barely be stopped. And once I do, I am at peace. I feel connected, like I am home. Something I have never felt before.
I just only hope I am not in over my head on this one. As much as this man can make me feel in ways you only dream about late at night or read about in books, I can’t get distracted. I can’t let myself give up by giving in. At the end of the toe-curling night we just spent together, that is the fear that overwhelms me as I try to focus on the events of the evening instead.
Noah
Walking in the front door of the house I share with Rex, I set my keys down on the counter and have to adjust myself as I take a few deep breaths again standing at the counter. I have never been as worked up over a woman, and I have absolutely never stopped myself without going for a home run before either.
It’s taken everything in me to try and think about other things, but just as I start to have control over both my heads, I smell her perfume lingering on me or remember the way she felt under my hands, and it all starts all over again. My manhood continues to stand at attention, needing like hell to release what has been building up inside of me while lying in the back of my truck with her for the last few hours.
I hear laughter coming from the back patio and grab a beer from the fridge. Popping the top off, I head out back to find Rex and Michael still in their suits from the club. Both are a little better or a little worse from the more than half-empty bottle of Jameson I see sitting on the table in front of them.
“Hey there, Romeo,” Rex starts off. “How was she?”
“Fuck off, Rex. Don’t be talking about my little sister that way!” Michael starts in.
I pull up a seat and take a long pull off my bottle, readjusting myself again at just the mere mention of her. Damnit, this is not good.
“That bad huh,” Rex starts.
I set my bottle down and smile, not one to kiss and tell as they say. This crowd proves even more difficult, seeing that both men would happily kick my ass if I dared to screw with her.
“You honestly expect me to sit here and answer any questions about my date? You’re crazier than I thought, asshole.” I laugh, picking up my bottle and continuing to take a gulp not a sip. Something has to work to lessen the spell she has over me and the way everything about her has somehow seemed to follow me home.
“You know, if you even think for a second you might screw this up one day, you better back out now,” Michael says. “I have no problem making sure to find a way to make you disappear if need be.”
Normally, I would respond with some sort of joke to break the tension, but the look the two of them are giving me makes me back up. I know that the protectiveness of a sibling is nothing to be messed with. Hell, I would never let anyone on earth mess with my own.
“Understood.” I nod at the two of them.
“I’ve heard about your past, man,” Michael begins, filling up both his and Rex’s glasses more than normal. “As much as I’m sorry about that, I don’t want to be the shoulder she’s crying on if you decide for any reason that you can’t be the man she deserves.”
I look at Rex, surprised. He was the only one that knew anything about my past with Becky. He wasn’t sworn to secrecy, but I never thought he would go blabbing about it to anyone.
“I confess,” Rex says, slurring a little bit. “I told him. But listen …” he continues, leaning forward and resting his arms on the table. “I did it because I know that if you are even thinking about anything again with any woman, then it must be legit, and I wanted him to know that.”
“Legit or not,” Michael starts, “you fuck with her, I fuck with you. End of story! You got that, southern boy?”
Trying not to glare but failing miserably, I nod. “Yeah! Got it.” The thrill of the night is gone. I guess I won’t need that cold shower after all with this unexpected confrontation.
“Good!” he says, slapping Rex on the back forcing him to sit up straight, he then proceeds to pour me a glass. “Now that we got that out of the way. Take a shot!”
“I think I’m good,” I say, lifting up my beer.
“To hell you are!” he exclaims, pushing the brown liquid towards me. “I saw the way you walked in here. Something has to quiet the sting of getting left high and dry.”
Rex laughs as he and Michael raise their glasses.
“To …” Michael begins, and I just raise an eyebrow.
They both look at me, waiting. I start to sweat a little under their glare, knowing that I have to come up with something good or I am about to get pummeled right here and now. I raise my glass and say …
“To not fucking up.”
“Damn straight!” Michael says as we all cheers and take the shot.
“Speaking of which, you still planning on moving back to Kentucky at the end of December,” Rex asks.
“Yeah … about that,” I say. “I don’t know, I heard of two club owners that might want a little work done on their club. I’m thinking I might make this move permanent …” At least for now, I think to myself.
“Good answer,” Michael says as he fills our glasses one more time. They both shoot theirs back, and I just sit with mine for a while, contemplating the decision that I just realized I made. In only a few weeks’ time, I have allowed a woman to have a pull over me that I swore to myself I would never let happen again. And even though I should probably feel anxious and sick to my stomach, I actually feel relieved and secure. There is a peace I have not felt in the past few years settling over me. As eerie as it seems, it almost feels like home for the first time in a long time. And I’ve heard that a wise man once said if you feel that way, you should always follow its path to wherever it takes you.
“Speaking of killing the sting, Rex here is well on his way to erasing a ghost that reared its ugly head this last week,” Michael says, breaking my train of thought.
Rex pushes back in his seat, slumping low and closing his eyes.
“I thought you promised not to mention her name,” he says, wincing at the thoughts obviously running through his brain.
“Did you hear a name in that sentence? Shit, you’re drunker than I thought.” Michael laughs.
Re
x just raises his middle finger but keeps his eyes closed. A few moments pass, and I am not sure if he is passed out, trying to stop the room from spinning, or dealing with the shit in his own head.
“What is all this about?” I ask.
“A certain redhead has haunted him for years,” Michael explains, and my mind immediately goes to Evelyn’s friend. “Poor bastard screwed that door shut on his own a long time ago, and no amount of banging has ever inched it back open again.”
Being the first time I have ever heard anything about it, I look at my friend and see him open up one eye, glaring at Michael.
“If I wasn’t seeing double of you right now, your ass would be on the floor,” he slurs, raising his glass and taking another sip of whiskey.
“Sure, lover boy.” Michael laughs. “She’s moving back home, you know.”
Rex sits up straight. “Shut the hell up,” he yells.
“I heard her say so to Ev at the club the other night.”
My stomach turns as I take in what I just heard. Evelyn was at the club the other night? What night? As much as I know we haven’t discussed being exclusive, those are definitely my intentions, and I do not like the idea of her anywhere where some other guy could put his hands on her. Hell, I could hardy stomach the idea of any man looking at her, knowing what they could and would be thinking. That first night I met her was proof enough.
“She was at the club?” I try and ask without drawing attention to myself.
Michael smiles as if he knows what I must be thinking, “Yup, two nights ago,” he tells me as I let it all sink in. “That is where this all started,” he gestures towards Rex.
I think about Rex’s issue for about two seconds before being dragged back into my own thoughts about a certain blond that has rocked my world and turned it completely around in such a short time.
Evelyn has succeeded in thrilling me in every way imaginable. Strangely enough, somewhere in loosing myself to her, I feel as if I am finding myself too. Knowing that I made a life-changing decision tonight, I take several minutes contemplating if I will grow to regret it. Even if the thought of her in the local hook-up spot has me a little twisted, I know without a doubt that I won’t. A smile slowly spreads across my face as I raise my glass to my lips.
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