by Tamar Sloan
Or the decision I just made.
A decision that has my heart roaring with agreement.
I turn back to the Loom, looking at it with new eyes. Eyes that know without a doubt something is wrong.
The blotches of black. There’s a pattern.
My eyes widen. I know every one of those locations. I’ve studied each one at some stage. Each stain begins at one of the health centers my father has built and spreads outward like a cancer.
“Micah. You can’t do this.”
I turn back to my mother, suddenly angry. “You’ve kept all this from me. The changes. The centers. Kadence being a demigod. Why?”
Mom comes to stand beside me, her eyes looking like blue steel. “You need to stop, Micah. This is exactly what I was afraid would happen. Your human blood is driven by emotion. Despite everything I’ve taught you, you’re considering going back.”
I shake my head. “I’m not considering anything, Mom. I’ve already decided.”
Mom gasps as she steps back. “You don’t know what that could mean, Micah.”
I head to the door, only turning around when I grasp the doorknob. “No one does. Not even you.”
Mom flinches and remorse clenches at my chest. I relax the death grip I have on the door handle. “I’ll be fine, Mom. I’ll stay hidden. My demigod power is the ability to teleport.” Something every Greek god can do. “It means I can go to these centers, try to figure out what’s going on, and be out before anyone knows I’m there.”
It would be so much quicker than having to fly around the continent. I can get some answers.
Then they can stop whatever’s happening.
Mom’s already shaking her head. “This is so much bigger than any of this, Micah. You can’t mitigate the risk your involvement could mean. You tried to do that and look what happened.”
I hurt Kadence more deeply than I ever thought possible.
I pause, the pain of that knowledge slicing through me. By going back, I could make whatever this is worse. It would mean, I was meant to stay separate like I’ve always been told.
Maybe it’s fate, but it feels like this decision has already been set in motion.
“I know it’s risky, Mom. I’ve spent my life watching the consequences of choices play out.” I release the door, feeling like I’m letting go of something much bigger. “But the alternative is to do nothing, and that’s not a choice I can live with.”
When Mom looks away, the corners of her mouth dragging down by disappointment, something tears inside my chest, but I don’t let it stop me.
I walk out of the room, then out of the house. I head down the path that will lead me out of Elysium.
With each step, my heart beats harder and faster and lighter. It knows. It’s counting down the seconds.
Until I see Kadence again.
Kadence
The sound of curtains drawing open grates across my ears. “Right, time to get out of bed.” Aunt Jo doesn’t bother to keep her voice quiet, even though I wince.
I roll over, shying away from the sun like a vampire. “Maybe later.”
“Or now.”
She whisks the covers off me, and I curl into a ball. “Hey, I was using those.”
“You don’t need them right now.”
I crack open an eye to find Aunt Jo standing akimbo, hands on her hips. Her opaque eyes are lasered at me. “Get. Up.”
Flopping onto my back, I stare at the ceiling. “What for?”
The bed sags as Aunt Jo sits beside me. “Oh, Kadence. There’s so much to get up for. But you need to be out there to see it.”
Except there’s no Micah.
I refuse to be part of a world that doesn’t have Micah in it.
But Aunt Jo isn’t going to take no for an answer. Her stubbornness is what’s made her so self-sufficient despite her challenges.
Pushing up onto my elbows, I frown at her, even though she can’t see it. “Fine, then. But if I break a leg, it’s your fault.”
She pats my leg as she stands again. “That’s my girl. And wipe that frown off your face. You’ll never pull off Oscar the Grouch. You’re too pretty.”
She leaves me to get dressed, and I find a sandwich sitting on the kitchen table when I come out. I glare at it. “If that’s a potato sandwich…”
Aunt Jo’s laughter tinkles from the kitchen. “I’ll tell Terry you said that.” She comes out, wiping her hands on a tea towel. “I think you should come with me.”
I’m already shaking my head. “Sorry, Aunt Jo. I’m, ah…”
I scramble for a reason to not have to be around two people falling in love. It’s the last thing I need right now.
“You’re off to see Nevaeh?”
“Yea—” I snap my mouth shut when I realize Aunt Jo just did a number on me. She knew I wouldn’t want to go to the markets.
With a smile the Cheshire cat would be proud of, she heads back into the kitchen. “You’ll thank me one day, Kadence.”
As I chomp into the sandwich, I glare at the empty doorway. I’ll go out, but the moment she leaves, I’m climbing back into bed.
It’s the only place where time can pass, and I barely notice.
I take as long as I can to eat the sandwich my mind doesn’t want, but my stomach rejoices over, hoping Aunt Jo will leave before me. Except, despite never having children herself, she must know exactly what I’m up to. She moves around the apartment, humming as she dusts the dust she can’t see.
With a sigh of defeat, I shove my chair back. “I’m heading out.”
“What a wonderful idea! Tell the others I said hello.”
If the universe doesn’t totally hate me, I won’t run into anyone else.
Outside, the sun feels too bright and the air feels too hot. Its suffocating and overwhelming all at once. Tucking my head into my shoulders and my hands into my pockets, I step onto the pavement.
A walk around the block and I’m done.
Except I can’t help myself. A few steps, and I look up and across.
What’s left of the apartment building is still there, although a large truck and some big machinery are parked nearby, “Dan’s Demolition” stamped on the sides. It seems the cleanup will be starting soon.
All that’ll be left behind is bare soil. I turn my face away. It’ll look like a graveyard.
Which reminds me, I was going to investigate Damien Black’s involvement with Hades, if there was any. It also reminds me of what I told my father when he visited.
Hunkering down like I’m walking in a snowstorm, I focus on the pavement in front of me. I should’ve fought harder to stay home. There’s nothing for me out here.
“Kadence!”
Turning, I find Nev waving her arm, standing beside the metal barricades. She’s smiling in the sun, like it’s any other day and we’re about to hang out.
I pause, letting out a defeated breath.
The universe hates me. Of course it does. I don’t know why I expected anything different.
I barely like myself.
Muttering that Aunt Jo probably lined this up, I head over.
Nev engulfs me in a hug. “Hey, it’s good to see you out and about.”
Pulling back, I shrug. “Aunt Jo looked like she was about to get her cranky pants on.”
“Probs because I told her I had something to show you.”
I narrow my eyes at her. “Ganging up on me like that isn’t nice, you know.”
Nev laughs. “Jo said you’d thank her one day.”
“Last time I checked, she wasn’t psychic.”
Nev giggles, but then sobers. “I do think it would be good for you to see this.”
Every muscle tenses. I can’t think of anything that would be good for me to see right now.
Apart from the one thing, or rather person I long to see—Micah.
Nev grabs my hand and pulls me around to the left, circling the giant pile of rubble. We move away from the trucks to the end of the street where Nev and I stood
and watched the building as it was demolished.
We round a particularly large slab of concrete and Nev stops. “Check this out.”
On the other side of the slab is graffiti, but not the graffiti that’s splashed sporadically all over the pile—the graffiti that speaks of anger and hate.
This graffiti is simple and sweet. The letters “RIP” are stark and black, but the broad, white angel wings spreading out behind it are a powerful contrast. Light and dark. Despair and hope.
I reach out but stop myself. It feels too fragile to touch. “What is it?”
“I think it’s Tyler’s version of a memorial. I thought you might like to see it.”
I frown. Tyler knew Micah? “It’s amazing.” Whoever painted this has talent.
“Yeah. This has really hit him hard.”
I open my mouth to ask what she means, but the sound of squealing tires has us both turning. A few steps backward, and the road comes into view.
A car’s swerving down the street, blue-and-white smoke trailing behind it, no doubt leaving stains of black on the asphalt. Jordan’s hanging out the window, hollering and punching the air. Juan’s sitting on the rolled-down window of the back seat, the upper half of his body hanging out, thumping the roof of the car.
Nev is shaking her head. “I’d bet all the money I don’t have that’s not their car.”
I take a couple steps forward, surprised at how angry I’m feeling, but not sure at who. At these kids for flirting with the possibility of trouble, or myself for being someone who helped them learn there’s no point in hoping for anything different?
With each rev of the angry engine and each mark of tire tracks left on the road, my frown deepens. With a gasp, it dissolves as I notice the other person in the car.
Tyler’s at the wheel.
For a brief second, our eyes meet. The grin that was stamped on his face collapses and he looks away. With a roar of the engine and squeal of tires, the car zooms away.
As calm settles again, I shake my head. Not only is Tyler throwing his own future away, he’s looking for passengers to join him in his downward spiral.
Nev sighs. “You need to talk to him.”
Micah would want to help them. Just like he wanted to help me.
I glance back at the graffiti. Despair and hope. Why do the two have to be so inexplicably interwoven?
“I just don’t get why the loss hit him so hard.” Maybe Micah had spoken to Tyler, too?
“He and Tanisha must’ve gotten pretty close, pretty fast.”
I spin around. “Tanisha?”
Nev’s brow crinkles in confusion. “Yeah. When she died in the demolition. Tyler’s taken it just as hard as you have.”
“Tanisha died?”
“You weren’t there when they brought out the body bag. Tyler got in her stepfather’s face, shouting it was all his fault.”
Tanisha died in the demolition.
Sweet, quiet Tanisha. No wonder Tyler’s so angry. That’s another loss in his short life.
He’s probably starting to think he’s cursed.
I freeze.
Just like I do.
I turn to Nev. “I’ll talk to him.”
Nev squeals and wraps me in a hug. “I knew you would. I knew you wouldn’t give up on him.”
“Hey, I didn’t say it’s going to make a difference.”
She squeezes my arms then releases me. “Of course it’s going to make a difference. Tyler’s always looked up to you.”
She skips back a step, her smile looking like I just told her I’m Santa. “I’ve gotta get going. But I’ll catch up with you later.”
“Oh, sure.” I’m getting the sense Nev has gotten what she was looking for. “See you around.”
With a jaunty wave and glittering smile, Nev’s gone, leaving me feeling a little like I just got caught up in a twister. I even pat my hair to make sure it’s not sticking up all over the place.
But the quiet after the storm quickly settles around me. I glance at the memorial Tyler’s painted.
Tanisha died in the demolition. I take a moment to honor the sweet, quiet girl who was looking forward to harvesting from the garden we created.
Then the next inevitable thought follows. If Tanisha died…what happened to Micah?
I saw him on the rooftop. I saw his panic as he ran.
The pile of rubble is beside me, a monolith of broken parts. Is his body still in there?
I’m already shaking my head. Is this why it’s been so hard to accept? Because maybe Micah’s still alive? Would I feel it if he was gone?
Or am I just wishing…
Deflating, only then realizing that hope has already started infiltrating and expanding, I take in the painting, the “RIP” in bold, black letters. I’m not sure it matters. Micah hasn’t been back since the demolition, after saying he couldn’t come back for who knows how long.
He’s still gone from my life. For now.
Maybe forever. Another body could still be dragged from the rubble I’m staring at.
And I have to decide what to do with that.
Crouching, I brush my fingers over the angry letters. I could assume he’s gone.
Then I brush the white wings spread wide. Or I could hope that he’s somewhere, gracing the world with his light. My heart trips out a fragile new beat. That maybe I’ll see him again someday.
Straightening my shoulders, I realize I can honor Micah’s moments in my life with grief and loss, or I can honor it with hope.
My chest expands on a breath, feeling like I haven’t inhaled this deeply in days. The pain is still there, but it doesn’t cramp my chest like it has. It’s no longer the only thing in there.
I’ve just turned around, determined to find Tyler and tell him exactly what he’s throwing away, when I stop.
No, I freeze.
I freeze so hard, I’m not sure I’ll ever move again. That I’ll ever want to move again.
Because if I’m dreaming, if I’ve finally lost touch with reality, I don’t want to wake up. I’m happy to be crazy.
Micah’s walking toward me.
He’s not smiling like he always does, and he seems to lack the usual graceful confidence in his stride.
But it’s definitely Micah.
Tall and lean. Dark and handsome. Breathtaking and heart-wrenching.
He keeps walking, coming closer. My pulse is galloping through my veins.
My lip quivers. “Micah?”
I only whisper the word, forcing it past lips that have forgotten how to function. But he hears it.
He hears it and smiles, and it’s like the sun has returned to my world.
He stops, only feet between us. “Kadence. I’m so sorry.”
I reach out, press my hand against his chest. I don’t want apologies. I want assurances I haven’t dreamed him up.
The heat beneath my palm is undeniable. The thrumming heartbeat finally has joy unfurling within me like a butterfly.
I relax, my hand sinking into the truth that is the boy standing before me. “The first time I saw you, I thought I dreamed you up.”
Micah’s eyes are the softest, warmest blue I’ve ever seen. “The first time I saw you, all I wanted was to be part of your reality.”
“Oh, Micah.”
We move simultaneously, coming together like we’ve been apart for a lifetime.
When we kiss, it’s like he never left.
Lips find each other, seeking, reaffirming. I grip him, pull him closer, feel him do the same. Just like mine, Micah’s hands are restless. They’re cupping my face, spearing into my hair.
Holding me like he never wants to let go.
I touch him anywhere I can reach. His strong jaw, his soft hair, his muscled shoulders, his warm skin beneath the edge of his T-shirt.
When we pull apart, we’re both gasping. Our hands, still refusing to believe we’re both here, keep moving. Micah seems determined to pull me in so close that our hearts will fuse, his hands pressing
every inch of me against him, while my hands keep seeking more skin to touch. There’s no part of Micah I don’t want to feel.
“I thought you were…” I glance at the memorial graffiti to our left, quickly looking away.
Micah’s hands cup my face. “I’m so sorry, Kadence. I hated that you believed that.”
“I’m not sure I really did, to be honest.” I smile. “I think I refused to believe there could be a world without you, Micah.”
Micah’s eyes close, his face almost pained. When he opens them, they’re so full of emotion it takes my breath away. “You never stop amazing me, Kadence.”
The pain of the past few days echoes through my chest. Questions start to cram in. “How did you survive? Why are you back?” My pulse trips. “When are you leaving again?”
Micah steps back, and I almost frown. He must notice, because he rubs the back of his head. “We have a lot to talk about, and I don’t think I can hold you and think right now.”
The tension melts away under the brightness of Micah’s honesty. How I missed this…
He lets out a breath, and despite the tension he seems to be holding, his lips twitch. “I think it’s time we were completely honest. We’ve both been keeping secrets from each other.”
I cross my arms. “I’m going to put it out there that you’ve kept far more than I have.”
Micah grins, his Mediterranean eyes twinkling. “Although you kept quite a big one.”
I blink. How is Micah here? Grinning? Teasing me?
“I just found out your father is Kronos, the god of time.”
My arms flop to my side as my mouth pops open. “How—”
He steps in closer. “My mother is Moira, goddess of fate.”
This time, Micah is there to catch me as my knees turn to jelly. He grips my arms, studying me, any trace of a smile, gone.
Micah is a demigod, just like me.
Suddenly, everything makes sense…
And yet, nothing makes sense.
“Wha— What’s your power?”
“Not nearly as impressive as yours. I can teleport between Crossroads.”
Which is how he survived the demolition.
I glance down at the ground beneath us. “This is a Crossroads?”