Breezes could be felt from the fireplace, but usually only from the top floors and it had to be much windier outside than it was right now. But this hearth was on the first floor.
Carefully protecting the little flame, Mairead studied the hearth. It lacked the ornate mantel that was in some of the keep’s main rooms, but it was like any other for the most part. She shuffled back and realized that she had never realized just how huge it was though. It was even bigger than the one in the solar, making it the largest in the keep. It was so big, she could almost walk inside it. Without thought, she moved forward and stuck her head into the charred structure. Immediately she felt the cool air and turned toward the source. Her eyes grew large. There was a large crack in the wall.
Completely focused on what she was seeing, Mairead stepped fully inside the hearth and then moved closer to examine the crack. She quickly deduced it was not a crack, but an opening. Using one hand, she pried it open, surprised it took little effort. She once again held out the candle, which now illuminated a narrow but traversable passageway.
Mairead stood there shocked. She had it all wrong. Hamish would not be back any minute. He had probably just left.
She began to chuckle. I sleep, Hamish had said. She had been asking the wrong question. But Mairead now had a new one. How did Hamish know there was a secret passageway? Mairead felt both impressed and frustrated. It must have been here twelve years ago. All this time, and she had never known. Did Selah? Did Robert? She highly doubted it.
Mairead bit her bottom lip and grinned, delighted with her discovery. She then followed the narrow tunnel to where it exited out near the village. Several discarded items were piled near the exit and she made sure nothing was disturbed and that she had remained unseen. After returning to his chambers, Mairead left and went back to her room, being careful not to make any loud noise.
Back safely inside her own bedchambers, she quietly closed the door and then quickly began to undress. If she was lucky, she could catch a couple of hours sleep for she was going to need them.
Nestled back in the covers, Mairead closed her eyes. She was still grinning.
She no longer needed luck to convince Hamish to teach her how to defend herself with a dirk. She now had all the leverage she needed.
* * *
Mairead’s eyes flashed with a sudden shower of angry sparks upon hearing his refusal. “If you don’t, then I will tell Selah and Robert about the secret passageway leading to the village from the hearth in your room. I might even tell them about the valley and that you have intentionally kept them in the dark about your plans.”
Hamish stared down at her without expression, without moving a muscle. The lines around his eyes and mouth etched deeper than ever before as his lips curled into a smile that held no humor . . . only menace. “Then do it.”
The biting words sent a chill through Mairead and she knew she had gone too far.
Hamish spun on his heel and was headed out the great hall doors. The noon meal was over and she had convinced Selah to leave early, giving her a chance to speak with Hamish privately. He had recognized what she was doing and attempted to leave as well, but Mairead had stopped him. Then she had tried everything, asking, persuading, even begging him to agree to train her on how to use the dirk. When nothing worked, she had made the threat. And she wished she could take it back.
Regret assailed her and she ran to block his path. “I’m sorry, Hamish. Really. I did not mean . . . I just need your help.”
His green eyes had grown dark and cold, and they bore down on her. “Understand this. I could leave right now and it will not be my home or my life uprooted in a few weeks. It will be yours.”
A thin chill hung on the edge of his words. He had spoken them too gently, too softly. He had meant every word and it set her on the edge. She was about to lose everything when all she wanted was a way to protect herself when he left.
Hamish gave Mairead one last hard look and stepped around her. She closed her eyes as grief and despair tore at her heart. She had seen in his eyes what she had done. To her family, to herself, but mostly to Hamish. Her threat had decimated the trust that had been growing between them. She was now one of the many women who had disappointed him. And it killed her. He needed to know that she did not mean it.
“Hamish, wait!” she called out again. He did not stop. She ran up to him and caught his arm just as it reached out to open the door.
Hamish looked down. “Let go.”
Mairead shook her head. Tears slipped down her cheeks. “Please listen to me first. Please,” she begged. “I would never betray you. I was just desperate for your help. For you to understand. I thought it was the only way. But I would not have gone to Robert or Selah. I swear it.”
Hamish turned to face her. He grabbed her upper arms and gave her a shake. “What, Mairead, just what do I need to understand that would make you risk your sister, Robert, little Rab, your home?”
Mairead closed her eyes, her heart aching with pain. “I just needed you to realize how much I need your help. There is no one else who can teach me what I need to know. You saw the guards yesterday. None of them has the ability and even if they did, I don’t trust them. And you said I couldn’t protect myself with the sword. And that is all I want. To be able to protect myself, so I said something stupid to get you to agree. But I never meant it. Please don’t leave.”
The anger in his countenance began to dissipate. “You need to be trained that badly?”
Mairead gulped. “I do.”
Hamish took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. His anger was returning tenfold, but this time it was not aimed at Mairead. “You are being threatened.”
Mairead bit her bottom lip and then nodded. To say different would be pointless. “I was and no, Robert and Selah do not know about it. Nor do I want them to know. Their way of handling things . . . well, it just wouldn’t work.” Hamish did not doubt it. Robert would probably advocate talking. “So please do not tell them. Please believe that I have my reasons.”
Mairead’s hazel eyes held so much despair that he could no longer look in them. This latest request, her fear, her persistence, her damn marriage-seeking quest . . . it all now made sense. Never had he been so mad.
Hamish grabbed the handle and without another word, left.
Chapter Ten
Mairead stared at the small knife in Hamish’s hand and tried hard to listen to what he was telling her. But she really did not want to learn to attack someone. She wanted to be able to defend herself, which is why she had asked to be trained on the dirk—not the sgian dubh. Known as the black knife due to the color of the bog wood in its handle, the small knife did not feel substantial enough to stop someone. It was made for cutting and slicing things, not for fighting. The dirk, on the other hand, was almost twenty inches and though it was nothing like a sword, it could at least do some damage. But Hamish had been adamant. No dirk. He would only train her on the sgian dubh and since she did not want to do anything that might cause him to change his mind, Mairead had quickly agreed.
She had been frightened when she heard a bang on her door early that morning. Only one person could have a reason to rouse her that early—Robert had relapsed. She had flown to the door in only her chemise, thinking it was Selah on the other side. Seeing Hamish, looking somber and still a little angry, she had stiffened, unable to move or speak.
He had taken a long look at her, his gaze traveling up and down her barely clothed frame, but when his eyes recaptured hers, they still held no warmth. Mairead felt terror then for she knew he had stopped by just to tell her he was leaving and she would not see him again. That his secret was now hers to tell, for keeping it no longer mattered. She had held her breath waiting for his crushing words, when he agreed to train her. Shock simply did not cover the range of emotions she felt.
“After the noon meal, meet me by the river where it bends sharp just north of the village. There is an odd-shaped boulder there. Do you know it?”
A
ll Mairead had been able to do was nod. She knew the rock he was talking about. It was a large chunk of granite jutting out from the ground that had been exposed by the wind and the rain. It was near a part of River Naver that was fairly close to Foinaven but difficult to access, due to the thick, tall weeds and thistles that grew in clumps along the shoreline. When she finally emerged on the other side of the brush, Mairead realized it was an ideal spot for training. It was remote, private, protected from the wind and a large portion of the beach was exposed.
As Mairead watched Hamish move the small knife, several footprints in the sand caught her attention. They led to the water’s edge and she guessed that this was where Hamish went to bathe.
“Are you paying attention?” The tone was sharp, causing Mairead’s eyes to snap back to what Hamish was doing.
Hamish grimaced at her lack of focus. Ever since he had left her in the great hall he had been stewing. Learning that Mairead feared for her safety had sent him to the edge of reason. Mairead’s words and her beseeching look had haunted him all day and night. Everything in him screamed to resolve the problem and fix it so that she never had to be afraid again. It took him hours before he realized that no matter what he decided to do, Mairead was right about one thing. She needed to be trained and not by anyone else. Not by Davros or even Amon. He needed to ensure she had the ability and the means to defend herself at all times, which meant knowing how to fight with a sgian dubh, not a dirk. A dirk was big and could not be hidden. But a black knife could be strapped to an arm or a leg and be on her at all times.
But protecting Mairead was not going to end with knife training. Hamish intended to do whatever was necessary to ensure she never used what he was teaching her. His next steps would be decided after he learned the name of the man she feared.
“Focus, Mairead. It was you who wanted this so badly, so prove it.” Hamish frowned. He was barking instructions and being anything but kind and friendly, but he was finding it difficult to rein in his anger.
Seeing he had her full attention, Hamish forced his tone to soften. He needed her to listen, not be afraid of him. “The first thing you need to understand is that a dagger is the most intimate of all weapons. Spears as well as bows and arrows kill at a distance. Even with hand weapons like the sword and halberd, you thrust outward to cause injury. Fighting with a dagger can only be done when two people are close. When a dagger connects, your hand will practically touch flesh and because the blade is short, one has only two defenses—attack or flee.”
Mairead swallowed and Hamish could see fear in her eyes. Her look comforted him to a degree. She needed to understand that what he was telling her was nothing like what she had been doing with the sword. That was to satisfy some need for physical challenge. What he was going to show her now was about life and death. “The best defense against a dagger is just not to be there. When you see one, you leave. But if you are the one wielding the knife, use it and without hesitation. If an attacker sees you waver, he will snatch the blade out of your hands and use it against you.” He paused. Mairead’s eyes had been locked with him the entire time, but it was critical that she grasped his meaning. “Do you understand what I am saying? Because you cannot protect yourself with a sgian dubh or even a dirk. Deflecting attacks with a small blade is not feasible and you have neither the weight nor the strength to fight a man. Defending yourself with a dirk means you must know how to fight with one. It’s close and it’s bloody.”
Mairead tilted her chin up in reaction to the challenge. “I understand.” Her eyes narrowed but did not waver. “Just show me where and how to aim.”
If Hamish had any doubt before that Mairead wanted this training, the look in her hazel eyes erased it. “Here, here, here, and here,” he said, pointing to his kidneys, liver, stomach, and heart. “Do not go for the chest. These blades glance off ribs easily, and while they do damage, it would not be enough to stop a man before he was able to attack back. Then you will lose whatever advantage you have. Now point to the areas I just showed you.”
Mairead did.
“Give me your blade.” Hamish reached out and wiggled his fingers, beckoning her to hand over the weapon. When she did, he gave her a short but thick stick. “Grip this and pretend it’s the blade.” Mairead did as instructed. Centered in her palm, the branch was not visible on either side of her fist, but it still gave her the feeling of what it would be like to hold the black knife. “Now close your eyes, count to three, and when you open them, show them to me again, but use the side of your fist.”
Mairead did so and found that Hamish had moved to the side, but she quickly acclimated herself and pointed to the vulnerable spots.
“Again, but this time move faster and don’t punch, but slice. Pretend the blade is in your hand. If you don’t make contact with your thumb, you missed.”
Mairead closed her eyes and when she opened them, lunged for all four spots, but the awkward angle made it difficult. They tried several more times before Hamish mumbled something under his breath about wasting his time. “You are thinking too much before you act. If your life is in danger, you have no time to think and strategize. If you move slowly, you might as well just concede and not fight at all.”
Hamish knew he was being harsh, but he had to be. Time was not on their side. She needed to learn these moves in the next few days and then practice them over and over. They had to become second nature.
Hamish also knew that he needed his anger to remain at the surface, affecting everything he said and felt. Without it, his other emotions would take over—desire, doubt, passion, stress, longing, misery, guilt, fear—all of which he felt when near Mairead, and none that he could control.
Mairead closed her eyes, determined to increase her speed. She counted to three and this time used her other senses to know where he was, rather than just her eyesight. It worked. She was able to lunge almost immediately and her aim was true. However, she still struggled with getting her fist to make contact as it would in a fight.
“Again. But in a different order.”
Mairead nodded each time as Hamish ordered her to attack him. She did it again and again, until she was finding him and making contact without hardly thinking.
“Good. Those are the vital organs, but they are not the only places you can attack. There is the arm”—he showed her where to slice the upper forearm—“and the back of the knee. And remember, each time you make contact the result will be bloody, so grip the handle hard, else your blade will slip through your hand.”
Mairead nodded and once again they started repeating maneuvers over and over after he demonstrated them to her. He showed her how to come in at the side, from behind, how to deflect attention, and use her size and femininity to her advantage.
They continued to work as the sun started to sink. Despite the air temperature dropping by several degrees, Mairead was sweating. She was putting everything into this session and Hamish was impressed. She was nowhere close to being competent at any maneuver, but that she could repeat some of them at all was amazing. Her abilities with a sword were a tremendous advantage. She understood how to balance her body and thrust and move.
If anyone had come upon them, their close proximity would have been seen as intimate, despite there being nothing intimate in Mairead’s touch. Tension ran throughout her entire body and except for the beginning her mind had been completely focused on what they were doing and why. She was not having fun. Everything about her demeanor cried out that Mairead didn’t want to learn how to use a knife. She needed to.
Mairead sidestepped and aimed her fist for his liver, but Hamish twisted out of the way, tripping her. Mairead fell, but then targeted the back of his leg and he could feel her muddy fist swipe the back of his knee.
He chuckled to himself, wishing everyone he trained learned as quickly as she did. “I’m impressed,” Hamish said, offering his hand to help her up. She said nothing and dusted the sand off her gown.
Mo chreach, Hamish wanted to know just who
it was threatening her. At first he thought it might be Ulrick, but Mairead knew that Hamish would not leave as long as he was a threat. And Mairead was not Ulrick’s type, Hamish had reminded himself repeatedly. He had seen Ulrick around women. He liked them wanton and sleazy. No, it had to be one of Ulrick’s men, someone Mairead was afraid might remain at Foinaven even after Ulrick was gone. That was why she had pressed to know his plan. Mairead had wanted to know who would stay and who would go. What she would soon learn was that it didn’t matter. Whoever she was afraid of—and he would learn his name—was not ever going to be in a position to threaten her again.
“We’re done,” Hamish said, gathering his things. “We’ll meet here again tomorrow. And I will tell you how to best avoid a blade.”
And tomorrow, you will tell me the mac na galla’s name.
* * *
“Today, your real training begins.”
Mairead quirked a brow. She did not say it aloud, but she could not keep her face and her body from showing her frustration. Just what had they been doing all day yesterday? She had returned to Foinaven exhausted but exhilarated. She knew that she would have to go over and over what Hamish showed her so that she could do the maneuvers without thought, but she had learned. Really learned. She had fallen asleep with a peaceful mind that actually held hope.
Hamish had been demanding, but he was also clear, conveying how to pivot and twist, and the advantages and disadvantages of each tactic. He had pushed her to do more than she thought she could at times, but in the end, she had surprised herself by performing all that he had asked. Her motivation was not meeting the challenge or even to make him proud. She was doing this for her.
“Yesterday was about learning how to defend yourself with a blade. Today is about defending yourself when you don’t have one.” Mairead pursed her lips together in understanding. Hamish was not teaching her how to use a dirk like she had asked. He was preparing her for what might come. He had seen her fear and even though she had refused to tell him what was its cause, he had guessed. But had he guessed who?
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