by M. A. Church
No one wanted an unhappy Janelle. Grimacing, I spoke quickly in a hope to head off an explosion. “I’m sorry, Janelle. I couldn’t find Marshell, started asking about him, and then Sam showed up, and—”
“Wait!” Marshell yelled, interrupting me. He stared at Janelle, who still had a death grip on Sam’s shirt. “Just wait! What did you say?”
Janelle just smirked.
I glanced around at the group. Dolf was smiling. Why? I went through Janelle’s little speech, and then my mouth fell open. “Holy crap! Did you say mate? You met your mate? Holy crap, Janelle!”
Dolf looked from Janelle to Sam. “Sam?”
Sam ran a hand through his dark hair. “Yeah, she is. Her scent just about knocked me down.”
“Holy crap, Janelle!” I said again and started to hug her, but a sudden hiss stopped me. Sam shot me a look, but the hiss had come from Heller who, somehow, I’d forgotten about.
“Lawson, paranormals don’t like others touching their mates, especially if that mate is unclaimed.” Marshell shot a look up at Heller, who was still sitting on the retaining wall. “Isn’t that right?”
Heller stood, stuck his tail up in the air, and took off into the darkness.
Okay, that still stung as much as the last time he did that. Sighing, I looked at the assembled company and noticed the awkward looks coming back at me. This was unbelievable. The damn man had run off on me again. How could I speak to him if I couldn’t get him to stay in one spot for longer than a few minutes? Did I need some catnip?
“There he goes again. What is his problem?”
Sam shrugged. “With Heller? Who knows.” He turned to Janelle. “Will you please stay for a while? We need to talk, but I left a human in my office. He’s interviewing for a job, and I really need to get back to him.”
“I’ll be here. Go do what you need to do, and then we’ll talk.” She glanced at the crowd around them. “Privately.”
Sam left, but Janelle stayed outside with us.
“So….” I looked at Dolf. If anyone had ideas about Heller, it would be him. “His problem?”
“Outside of being a dick, that is,” Marshell added.
“Oh, for….” Janelle rolled her eyes. “Shut it, baby brother.”
Dolf stared out into the night, his features tight, but finally he turned to me. “I apologize for Heller’s actions. He can be impulsive, somewhat high maintenance, and he doesn’t always think before he opens his mouth. But I swear to you, he’s a good man, really, but he’s… well….”
“Scared,” I finished for Dolf. “You both have told me he’s my mate, but this is twice he’s run from me. Now I know what a mate is since I know Janelle and Marshell. But guys, that”—I waved in the direction Heller ran off in—“isn’t a man who wants a mate.”
Marshell shook his head. “It’s not that he doesn’t want a mate, Lawson. It’s that he doesn’t want a human mate. Your mate doesn’t think humans are good enough—that you’re good enough.”
Dolf tightened his lips. “Heller’s certainly flawed. From how he’s acting now, I’m willing to bet a human hurt him, and badly. I’m not making excuses for him, Marshell, but I do have to wonder why you continue with the snide comments to Lawson about his mate. You must know that’s painful for him.”
“Heller rejected him,” Marshell said. “I say Lawson should cut his losses now and move on.”
An ache uncurled around my heart, which surprised me. Well, hell. Thinking of giving up hurt me. I don’t know what I was expecting, but that wasn’t it. Where was this hurt coming from? Mate bond, whispered through my mind. Jesus, I didn’t think it could happen this fast or to a human.
“So that’s it?” Dolf snapped. “Make a mistake and that’s the end of that? I had no idea you were so perfect. What must it be like to never screw up, I wonder?”
“That’s enough, both of you!” I snapped, and both men turned to me, twin looks of surprise on their faces. Good. I managed to shut them both up. I’ve met this guy twice, and look how he’s crawled under my skin. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that, but I knew I wasn’t willing to walk away.
“Marshell, stop being an ass,” Janelle said. “The guy apparently panicked and screwed up. Shit happens. Just wait until you find your mate. Hormones raging out of control aren’t conducive to clear thinking. Trust me. It’s all I can do to keep my nature under wraps and not to drag Sam off somewhere.”
“Oh God, TMI.” I was tempted to stick my fingers in my ears. “So back to why. I need answers if I’m going to fix this. If this can be fixed. He’s been clear about his feelings. So give me a reason to keep trying, Dolf. Why does Heller feel this way?”
“No one really knows for sure,” Dolf said. “Recently he hinted something happened involving a human, but he refused to tell me what. I do know it was bad. I’ve known Heller my whole life, and somehow I’ve missed this. Don’t give up on him. He is a good guy. You just have to get through some of the other layers first.”
“What a mess.” I was still hungry to boot. “What do I do?” My stomach growled, and then I shivered. “Inside. Whatever I’m going to do, it’s going to be done inside. I’m cold.”
Dolf left Heller’s clothes on the table and opened the patio door for us. “Why don’t we all reorder? May I join you? I can tell you a little about myself and Heller while we wait.”
I looked at Marshell. “That’s fine by me.”
Marshell shrugged.
Janelle glanced down at her hand and sighed. “Well, I’m certainly not leaving any time soon, so why not?”
Dolf’s table was more secluded, so we sat there. After reordering, Dolf sat back. “So a little about us. We number about forty members, and most of us live in and around West Falls. We own close to a hundred acres right outside the city line and that backs up to the Crowley’s Mountains State Park. My dad is the current leader, and I’ll take up the reins when he retires.”
“And Heller? I heard what Marshell called him outside.” I meant Marshell called Heller a beta. I hated how carefully we had to speak about things, but since we were in public, we didn’t have a choice.
“He’s part of the second-ranking individuals within the dominance hierarchy. He’s one of them. The others are Aidric LeClair, Brier Fendon, and Remi Ginn. I’ve known all of them since birth.”
“I get that. I also know how some of you feel about my, um, kind,” I said. Oh yeah, I was well aware how many paranormals felt about humans.
Paranormals had laws, a government, and punishments suited to their kind. In each territory they voted for which elected Alpha was on the ballot. The winner led that territory and their title was territory leader. They were like human governors.
There were five territories in the US: Eastern, Central, Mountain, Island, and Western Zones. Those five territory leaders joined with other territory leaders from around the world to make up the Alliance of Paranormals, which had over a hundred members. They had the power to change laws voted on by territory leaders. It was a lot like the human Supreme Court.
Dolf nodded. “It’s no secret, true. But you’re friends with Janelle and Marshell, so you aren’t totally unaware of the issues. I also want you to know I have two mates, Tal and Kirk. Kirk was like you.”
Meaning Kirk was human. Could he shift like Dolf and Heller? It looked like I was going to be studying up on werecats.
“Huh,” Janelle said. “Odd, but threesomes aren’t unheard of.”
“No, they’re not. It was a shock, though. Tal and I had been together for a long time when we found Kirk. I have to tell you, his assimilation wasn’t without… problems.”
Marshell cocked his head. “In what way? Considering what your position is, I’d think there would be a minimum of problems.”
Dolf grimaced. “There’s no way to pretty this up, so I’ll be blunt. An ex member—and yes, an ex-lover—tried to kill Kirk. Part of it had to do with who Kirk was before we mated him, but it also had to do with my position. This person di
dn’t feel I was worthy to lead with Kirk as a mate.”
“Good gods,” Janelle whispered. “That’s insane.”
Dolf nodded. “Agreed. It cost him his life. No one messes with my mates, or any mates in my clowder.”
Marshell glared at Dolf. “Do you really think we’d let Lawson join you after hearing that?”
“I don’t believe that’s your choice to make,” Dolf replied evenly.
“Um, I’m sitting right here, guys,” I said. “I’m more than capable of making my own decisions. Plus everyone’s assuming Heller wants me.”
“Oh, he wants you. He just doesn’t want you to be… you know.” Dolf waited as the waitress brought out their food and left before speaking again. “After the mating takes place, what Lawson is will change. We all know that. Heller knows that. Doesn’t change the fact you haven’t been raised as we were or have our values.”
I nibbled at my steak. “Maybe not, but I have a better handle on this than most. I’ve been part of their, ah, lives”—I nodded at Marshell and Janelle—“for a good ten years, and known about them for eight. They accepted me, but it wasn’t all smooth sailing.”
Dolf looked from me to my friends. “I imagine there’s a story there. A very interesting one, I bet.”
“Yeah.” Dolf seemed like a nice guy, and I might end up being part of his clowder one day, but my relationship with the Vetala wasn’t any of his business. Yet.
Sam eventually joined us, and everyone could see how he and Janelle acted toward one another. It was nice, but jealousy went hand in hand with how pleased I was she’d found her mate. I couldn’t help it. That should’ve been Heller and me. Instead I was stuck here watching this play out while Heller was God only knew where.
Dinner was finally over, and still no sign of my mate. Janelle and Sam stayed at the restaurant. She had her car and could leave when ready. Dolf went home too. Marshell took me back to our business to pick up my vehicle.
“Are you going on home?” Marshell asked as he parked at the shop.
“Yeah. I’m tired, and I have some serious thinking to do.”
Marshell nodded. “I know you. You’re not giving up, are you?”
“I can’t, Marshell. I can’t just walk away. If I go by what I’ve learned about mates, then Heller is supposed to be the perfect match to me. That has to mean something, and for right now, I’m not willing to walk away. Not yet.” I shrugged. “But first I’m going to make a quick trip inside to my office, and then I’ll head home.”
Marshell stood by the back door. “Oh? Why?”
“I left my iPad. I don’t want to leave it here all night.”
“Want me to wait?”
“Naw, you go on. I won’t be but a minute.” I turned off the alarm and opened the back door.
“See you at home, then.”
“Sounds good,” I said.
Chapter Six
Heller
OKAY, SO flouncing off might have not been the best idea ever. I really needed to start thinking before I reacted. It wasn’t as if traveling the distance home was a big deal. It wasn’t. I might end up with sore paws, but I knew where I was going.
This didn’t explain why I was currently crouched under a car in the parking lot and not on my way home. Not sure this qualifies as a good idea either. The car I hid under was located next to the back parking lot for The Perfect Touch Auto Spa and Detailing Shop.
When I scented Lawson on Marshell, I lost it. The idea of another male covered in my mate’s scent drove me nearly out of my head. Hot on the heels of that came ball-shivering horror when I learned Marshell was a paranormal who fed on the blood of humans.
Gut-wrenching fear smothered me, and suddenly the fact Lawson was human didn’t matter so much. My first concern was if Lawson was okay. Then Marshell threatened to keep my mate from me and fear turned into raging anger.
How dare Marshell try to come between my mate and me? The freaky blue snake eyes and fangs hadn’t stopped me from shifting. The other paranormal pissed me off, and my cat wanted out to make a point, even if that meant using claws and teeth.
Funny how things turned around on me. Lawson’s humanity wasn’t the tremendous issue I once thought it was—and wasn’t that just a shocker? All it took was a perceived threat to my mate for me to wake up and see that. I guess it was the kick in the ass I needed.
Lawson’s being human didn’t matter. No, the issue was the closeness I sensed between Marshell and my mate. That bothered me. It was obvious there were deep ties there. It never entered my mind my mate might be involved with another, and I didn’t know how to deal with that.
Well, outside of the fact it made me crazy. My temper still sparked at how easily Marshell touched what was mine. Then the female showed up and she too reeked of Lawson’s scent. It was more than I could stand. I left the restaurant, furious.
Was Lawson involved with the both of them? And that was what sent me running. I knew threesomes happened with shifters and with other paranormals. So how involved was Lawson with them? I knew they hadn’t mated Lawson—his scent was pure human.
But just because Lawson wasn’t a mate to them didn’t mean he didn’t love both the Vetalas. It wasn’t until I’d covered several miles that I realized I’d left Dolf there all alone. I shuddered, remembering those fangs of Marshell’s. Damn things were long.
I almost went back, but Dolf had Sam and several other clowder members there. And frankly I didn’t get the feeling the Vetala were a threat to Dolf, especially since the female was Sam’s mate. Right, forgot that for a moment. She’s out of the picture now.
If she was in a relationship with Lawson, well, that just came to a screeching halt now that there was Sam. That still left Marshell. What was I going to do? I ended up at Lawson’s business. Some part of me needed to be here since this was the only place I knew to find him.
Didn’t that just speak volumes? Then I saw Lawson and Marshell drive up together, and I died a little inside. Was this my punishment for how I acted toward my mate? Did my goddess give me a mate who was involved with another? Then they talked about going home, and I remembered they lived together.
I was relieved even as the idea of my mate living with another man annoyed me. Dammit, Lawson shouldn’t be living with anyone but me. The thought so startled me I sat up suddenly and banged my head on the undercarriage of the vehicle I hid under.
I let the idea roll around in my head. It didn’t send me screaming into traffic. My whiskers twitched as I thought about Lawson’s clothes in my closet, Lawson’s shampoo in my shower. It didn’t freak me out. At all.
In fact I rather liked the idea of having someone to wake up with, someone who’d be able to scratch that spot I couldn’t reach, and…. Taking a deep breath, I looked at my feelings. Lawson might be human, but he had experience with paranormals.
He knew how to act around us. The fact he even knew about us and was still alive meant he could be trusted with our secret. That sounded harsh, but facts were facts. And, well, he seemed like a nice guy.
That day I first met him in his shop, I’d felt the concern radiating off him. He’d truly been worried about me. He spent so much time around other paranormals; maybe he’d learn how to repress some of his more annoying human habits.
Then I sighed, just letting all the stress go.
Somewhere along the way, the fact Lawson was human took second place to the fact he was probably in a relationship. Maybe it would be better for all involved if I just tried to forget Lawson. Right on cue my cat screeched at me. Then again maybe not.
I watched as Marshell returned to his vehicle. Marshell paused as he got in and then glanced at where I hid. The fur down my back stood straight up when I saw the smirk on Marshell’s face. Fucker. Marshell knew I was here and hadn’t told Lawson.
That made up my mind. I want him. I didn’t know exactly what was going on with those two, but Lawson deserved better. He deserved someone who wouldn’t hide things from him. And that includes me. By
Bast’s right paw, I’m going to have to… talk about my feelings.
Oh the horror.
I watched Marshell drive off. I glanced at the back door of the shop, debating with myself. I could paw at the door. Maybe Lawson would hear me, but then what? I couldn’t shift so we could talk since then I’d be naked.
If I was naked around my mate, the last thing I was going to want to do was talk. It might be better to wait. I crept out and wandered over to Lawson’s car. I was tempted to lift up my back leg and pee on a tire, marking my territory so Marshell knew just whom Lawson belonged to, but I resisted. I’d already made a bad impression.
I might not want to compound that by peeing on his car. After I memorized the license plate, I hurried back to my hiding place. I wanted to get home and run the license plate, which wouldn’t be a problem for me since I used to be our clowder’s hacker, but I also needed to see Lawson leave.
I needed to know Lawson was safe. No doubt about it, the mate bond was working on me. How in the world had Dolf and Tal waited? Ye gods, I’m going to have to get permission from my Alpha and the elders too. The temptation to bang my head on the concrete was great, but I resisted. Humans might find it odd seeing a cat doing that.
Eventually Lawson came out, locked up, and went to his car. As soon as the taillights were out of sight, I left my hiding spot and began the long trek home.
THE VERY first thing I did when I got home, outside of dressing, was check in with Dolf and start apologizing.
“Heller, just stop, will you? It wasn’t a big deal. Your job is to protect our Alpha, and that’s still my dad, not me. Anyway, I wasn’t in danger. Marshell might get on my nerves, but he didn’t threaten Sam or me. Actually I do believe his sister would’ve pulled his fangs out if he’d looked cross-eyed at Sam.”
I paused by the sink and poured a glass of water. All that walking left me thirsty. “I don’t like him.”
“You’re jealous.”
I started to deny it, but didn’t. Dolf was right. I rolled my neck until it popped, then sighed heavily. “You’re right. I am. I hate not knowing what’s going on with the two of them, and Marshell sure isn’t helping matters. He’s a dick.”