by Cherry Adair
"I've never treated Jessie that way."
"Asked yourself why?"
Joshua gave the older man a penetrating look. "I've thought about it." His tone was grim. "In the past weeks, I've thought of little else."
"Well then?"
Joshua stared at his uncle. "You want this for her very badly, don't you?"
"I want this very badly for both of you, son. But mostly for you because, I have to tell you, I believe Jessie could limp along with her life without you. But I don't believe you're going to manage much of a life without her."
"She's pregnant."
"Congratulations."
"The child isn't mine."
"Don't be absurd. Of course it is."
"I had a vasectomy years ago."
Simon shook his head. "It wouldn't be the first time nature won over a surgeon's knife. If you have doubts, check it out. Hell, you're already here. When you're finished, ask your doctor for a refund."
Joshua sank down on the side of the bed. "Jesus, you crafty bastard, haven't I gone through enough humiliation for one day?" Simon smiled. "Guess not."
* * * * *
Jessie sat in her car looking at the diner. This is where it had all begun. The beginning of the end. Rain sluiced down her windshield, blurring the lights. The whop-whop-whop of the wipers was starting to get on her nerves.
A sharp white spear of lightning illuminated the sky: thunder rumbled overhead. Perfect, just perfect. The cold desolation squeezed around her heart, and she choked on the lump in her throat.
Her eyes were dry, but still burning from the last bout of tears, as she got out of her car. Bareheaded, she made a mad dash for the door. The familiar smell of grease and pine cleaner assailed her on the way to a back booth. She removed her damp raincoat and glanced around. Half a dozen customers, most of them truckers, occupied the adjacent booths.
A young family sat at the counter. Mother, father and two cute toddlers. Jessie stroked her hand down her tummy and gave the little girl a smile. The child played peekaboo over the back of her chair until her mother reprimanded her, making her turn around to eat.
Jessie enjoyed the momentary distraction. A gum-chewing waitress rounded the counter and asked if she wanted coffee. She ordered food she wasn't hungry for, then stared morosely at the scratched beige Formica tabletop.
For the past few weeks she'd stayed in a hotel in San Jose. She hadn't wanted anyone to know where she was until she'd figured out what she was going to do, and where she was going to go.
Joshua Falcon's reach was long and deadly. The rational part of her mind told her to move to another galaxy far, far away. Unfortunately, she wasn't that smart. She had other plans.
Her heart did a one-two thump. Anger would have been wonderfully cathartic, but she had no right to it. Other than the way it had been delivered, everything Joshua had said in his office had been true. From his point of view.
She didn't have a leg to stand on. Her pain, however, despite knowing she'd asked for it, was very real. She'd always prided herself on taking responsibility for her own actions. She was one-hundred percent responsible for her own broken heart. Joshua had never lied to her.
The waitress set down the special. Jessie poured a blob of ketchup on the plate beside the fries. She had wanted this baby. She wasn't sorry about any of it. She waved a fry in the red blob before biting it in half.
She'd taken a chance on love. And lost.
Until the next round.
If she was mad at anyone, it was herself. For believing she could change a man so set in his ways. The Glacier. Rock hard and implacable. Slow to melt. So accustomed to a woman's betrayal, Jessie ached for him.
She sipped the industrial-strength coffee as she glanced around. So much had changed in her life since she'd last been here. It was strange to see everything had remained the same at the diner. The same dusty plastic plants hung from the yellowed ceiling. The same rips marred the same vinyl seats. The same cheap tacky Christmas decorations sprouted haphazardly about the place.
Jessie sighed. At least there were some constants in life.
She glanced at her watch then looked out the rain-sprinkled window. She squinted against the bright flash of lightning that illuminated the almost empty lot. She waited for the thunder but the whop-whop-whop outside sounded more like her aged windshield wipers.
She ate two more fries, eyed the greasy battered fish, then picked up the fork and swam the cod through a ketchup sea.
It was very late, well after ten. Jessie wondered what time Joshua had arrived home tonight or if he was even in the country. What had his reaction been to the tree and gifts? God, she hoped it softened him a little, made what she'd done a little easier to take. With Joshua it was impossible to guess how he'd react.
She'd give him twenty-four hours to digest everything, then she'd use whatever it took to make him see he loved her, too.
Wherever he was, he'd better be alone. Jessie straightened. It was early for mistress number… whatever, but Joshua had been angry enough to ignore his own calendar.
Jessie rested her cheek on her hand and closed her eyes as pain swamped her. She couldn't bear thinking of him with another woman. She'd promised herself she would never read another paper or watch tabloid TV ever again. She couldn't stand the thought of Joshua kissing another woman.
Beneath her fingers she felt the warmth of her cup as it was refilled. "Thanks." Jessie wondered what the waitress thought of her sitting here mumbling to herself and opened her eyes.
Unless waitress attire had drastically changed since she'd worked here, someone else had poured her coffee. Jessie's heart leaped to her throat. Wishing, and not daring to hope, she kept her eyes on the pair of size twelve Haas shoes beside the table. She heard the creak of leather.
"Jessie."
The familiar voice sent a shock wave through her. She slowly lifted her gaze. He looked exhausted, but gloriously handsome. His dark hair was disheveled. He wore jeans and the brown bomber jacket over his red Tahoe shirt. He handed the coffeepot he'd commandeered back to the waitress and stuffed his hands into his pockets.
"Have you stopped having evening sickness?"
She swallowed hard, gripping her coffee mug with both hands because she wanted to touch him so badly. "Yes. I feel wonderful now."
Joshua sank into the seat opposite, his eyes fixed on her face.
"How did you find me?" She couldn't tell by his somber expression what he was thinking.
"I leaned on Conrad and Archie. They told me you were on your way up to the cabin. Then I hopped the helicopter. I had a feeling you'd stop here."
Jessie looked out at the parking lot. Amazingly, a black, silver and burgundy Falcon helicopter was parked next to her car.
"I wanted to go to the cabin one more time." Jessie's eyes stung. Not now, damn it. "I was going to mail the deed back to you next week."
He took her hand, his eyes grave. "I wanted you to have it." Joshua's fingers tightened around hers. "Damn it Jessie." His voice was tight. "This isn't what I came up here to discuss." He ran his splayed fingers through his hair. It stood up in shark fins. Jessie stared.
"If you came for more apologies, you have them." She tried to pull her hand away, but he used both hands to hold her in place. She gave him a pointed look. "But I won't apologize into infinity."
"I don't want apologies."
"I can't handle… What do you want, Joshua?"
"I want you to marry me."
Jessie squeezed her eyes shut. When she opened them the look she gave him was cool. "I don't blame you for wanting to hurt me because of the lies I told you. But please," she started to rise and he held her firmly in place, his hands warm around hers, "please, don't taunt me."
Jessie bit the inside of her lip to keep it from trembling. Her eyes filled with the annoying tears that still plagued her. She stared out the window, willing her eyes to dry.
"Mommy? How come that man's kneeling down by the lady?" The sweet piping voice of t
he child at the counter brought the noise in the diner to an abrupt silence.
"Turn around, honey. It's rude to stare."
Jessie turned as the child was forced to look away by her mother.
"Marry me. For real. Forever, Jessie." Joshua's voice was so low she had to strain to hear him.
Hope leaped in her heart. She opened her eyes slowly. Joshua was on one knee, head bowed, beside her. "Oh God, Joshua." Jessie's sob caught in her throat. "Please, don't." She couldn't bear to see him so humbled.
He looked straight into her eyes. His were sheened and his jaw clenched. "Be my wife, Jessie." His voice had an almost imperceptible break in it. "Please."
She reached out and touched his face. His skin felt chilled.
His hand covered hers. "Say yes."
"Get up, please."
"Say yes first."
"We have to talk," Jessie said desperately, not allowing hope to bloom. "There are so many things we haven't sai—"
He rose and put two fingers across her mouth. "Shhh. We have a lifetime to say all the things we want to say." He sank into the seat opposite, his eyes fixed on her face.
She tasted blood as she chewed the inside of her lip. Life was hard enough on a child. She would never subject the baby to a father who didn't love it wholeheartedly.
"It's Thursday," he said, his lips twitching slightly as Jessie looked at him blankly. "Remember? You told me once you only married strangers on Thursdays." He picked up her hand, toying with her fingers. Jessie felt the electricity of his touch down to her toes.
"That was a lifetime ago," Jessie whispered, stunned he'd remembered. "So much has happened in between—"
"Yes. I finally grew up." He sounded impatient with himself. "I should have held on to you then, Jessie. We could have had those seven years together if I hadn't been such an insensitive ass."
"You were my knight in shining armor," Jessie told him quietly, her fingers gripping his. His gaze was so serious as he scanned her face.
"A pretty damn tarnished knight." His lips twisted. "I allowed what my mother and Stacie had done to me to color my emotions. And, like a fool, I almost lost the best thing to happen in my life." He tilted her chin with his finger. "Can you ever forgive my transgressions, Jess?"
"You know I have." A hot wash of tears bathed her cheeks. Her stomach churned as she fought the impulse to throw herself into his arms.
"Ah, Jessie." He leaned forward and dabbed the tears spilling down her cheeks with her napkin. "I went home late yesterday afternoon," he said, turning the napkin to a dry corner. His pale eyes remained fixed on her. "I was dreading going into that damn cold, dark house one more time. Ready, in fact to put it on the market. You were everywhere, Jess. Everywhere and in everything. Everywhere I looked, everything I heard, everything I tasted and smelled."
"And I realized I could sell all my houses, the yachts, the planes, it wouldn't make a damn bit of difference. Because no matter where I was, no matter what I did, you would always be there with me. In my heart."
She stared at him wide-eyed, her heart in some kind of weird time warp. Too terrified to believe what he was saying. And just as terrified not to.
"I opened each of the presents you gave me and I wondered who had taught you to be so loving. Who had shown you how heart-achingly wonderful a loving touch could be. Not your mother. Not a man."
He dropped the soggy napkin and reached in his pocket, then withdrew his handkerchief and resumed blotting her tears. "I realized, almost too late, that what you were giving me was what you had always craved for yourself. Tenderness, caring, trust and unconditional love."
She wanted to say something, anything. But her heart seemed to have stopped beating. The world, her world, had paused on its axis.
Again Joshua reached into his jacket pocket. He pulled out an envelope, then laid a small blue box on the table between them.
"I love you, Jessie Adams. I might be a slow learner, but when I've learned the lesson, I assure you, I never forget. I can't imagine my life without you. Please, remarry me and put me out of this misery."
Jessie stared down at the box with blurred vision.
He nudged it closer.
"What about the baby?" She took his hankie from him and wiped her cheeks. He gave her that smile she loved, the one that crinkled the corners of his eyes, and pushed an envelope across the table.
"And I love our baby."
"You don't believe she is your baby," she reminded him, forgetting how to breathe.
"It's… a she? She is my baby, Jessie. If she's part of you, then it's part of me." He smiled. "Do you know what a good father does for his children?"
Jessie could think of a thousand things. She shook her head.
"The best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother."
Jessie's chest ached.
She dabbed her eyes with the hankie again. "I'll be glad when my hormones get back to normal," she said waspishly. "I hate all this crying in front of you."
He smiled. "You can do anything you like in front of me, Jess."
"What's in the envelope?"
"Open it and see." He took a sip of her coffee. "Only you would be more interested in the envelope than the jewelry box."
She gave him a look before she opened the small velvet box. "This is definitely real." The diamond was not ostentatious, just exquisitely beautiful, surrounded by baguettes, in a simple gold setting. She pushed it across the table and stuck out her left hand. "Put it on quickly," she demanded.
Joshua laughed. Coming around to her side of the table he eased her against the window. She closed her eyes as his fingers threaded through her hair. She tilted her mouth. Then he kissed her. Softly and leisurely and with every fiber of love he could muster. She felt giddy when he let her up for air.
The few patrons of the restaurant applauded and Joshua made a big production of sliding the ring on her finger. His gaze devoured her face before lowering to rest on her tummy.
"God, Jess," he said breathlessly, one hand reverently touching her through her thick sweater. When he finally looked up, his eyes had filled with tears.
"I love you, Joshua Falcon."
"I know you do, Jessie. And I plan to spend the rest of my life cherishing you. There'll never be a day you won't know how much I love you in return."
"Are you sure?"
"Absolutely, unequivocally, and positively." He pushed her bangs out of her eyes. "Are you going to open this?" he asked, his arm around her. He nudged the envelope closer.
"Is it important?"
"No. Just a small test I had."
"What kind of test?"
"Sperm count."
She looked at the sealed opening.
"And you haven't opened it?"
"The results make no difference to me, I told you that."
"And you'll marry me again and love the baby no matter what that piece of paper says?"
"Without a moment's hesitation," he assured her.
Jessie handed the envelope back to him. "You open it."
"It makes no—"
"Open it."
She watched as he slit the envelope open with his Swiss Army knife, unfolded the single sheet and scanned the test results.
"Well?" She raised an eyebrow.
"It says—" Joshua swallowed roughly and looked at Jessie with his heart in his eyes. "It says you are marrying an idiot who adores you, and that we'll live happily ever after, and have at least two more children."
Jessie felt the smile blossoming from her heart. "I love a happy ending, don't you?"
--The End--
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