by Anna Jacobs
Smiling, she went to get ready, dismissing the woman at the council from her mind. It was some silly mix-up, but that was still no excuse for treating her as if she’d lost her wits.
A couple of days later Nicole decided to go back to work and suggested Paul go back to school.
‘I can’t! Kieran’s coming round to help me fit the security system.’
She hesitated – and was lost. ‘Very well. Just this once. But from now on, you’ll be going to school regularly, whether we stay here or move back home. You’re an intelligent lad and you could go to university or anything you liked.’ She glanced at her watch. ‘I haven’t got time to discuss that now, but we should have a serious talk about your future at some stage, don’t you think?’
‘I’ve got a few ideas about what I want to do, but Dad said they were rubbish and he wanted me to study business.’
‘It’s your life and in the end, your choice, but I do hope you’ll listen to advice before you make up your mind. There’s just one thing: would you mind if we stay here at the flat for the moment? I know it’s quite small, but I wouldn’t feel safe going back to the house.’
‘I’d rather stay here. This street is quite busy, so I’ll feel safe walking back from school.’
He kept shocking her with such revelations. ‘Have you been feeling that unsafe? Is it William or someone else?’
He hesitated, then said, ‘William and some friends of his. And Mum – take your car to work this time.’
‘I will. And don’t open the door to anyone except Kieran.’
She walked down the street. The garage door opened smoothly, and as she backed her car out, Kieran came across from the flats to see her, so she rolled her window down.
He bent over. ‘Going to work today? Are you sure you should?’
‘I can’t keep taking time off. But I’ll take things easy physically. They’ll understand. Paul’s staying home to help you with the security system.’
‘He’s a great kid.’
‘Not such a kid any more. He’s growing up fast.’
‘Will your car be somewhere safe?’
‘Yes, we have a locked basement car park for staff.’
‘Good. Are you going to the hospital today as well?’
‘Yes, of course. I thought I’d nip across in my lunch hour. I don’t see the need to make Paul go through that every day. It’s hard seeing someone who was walking and talking normally a month ago lying comatose.’
‘How about I pick you up at the library and drive you to the hospital? It’ll be safer.’
She went very still, then had to ask, ‘Do you think William’s that dangerous?’
‘No one knows exactly how far he’d go. Some drugs have unpredictable effects and we don’t know exactly what he’s been taking. Those car parks at the hospital are very big. Better safe than sorry, don’t you think?’ He waited then asked gently, ‘So … what time shall I pick you up?’
‘One o’clock. At the main entrance to the library. I’ll ring if there’s any difficulty with that.’
As she drove off, she could see him in her rear-view mirror, a lean man with a thin, intelligent face. A kind man, helping strangers like her.
And a very attractive one, too.
Guiltily she tried to suppress this train of thought, but it wouldn’t be suppressed. It was a long time since she’d felt that stirring in the blood which came from sheer physical attraction. It made her realise how long that had been missing from her relationship with her husband.
Had Sam stopped finding her attractive? No, she kept forgetting. He’d not been unfaithful, he’d been ill.
Only … what had he been doing all those times when he’d come home late? He said he’d been working late, but she’d rung once or twice and the security guy said there was no one in the building.
Maybe he’d been having a drink with friends.
Oh, hell, why was she obsessing about this? Done was done. You had to move on.
Janey rang up Miss Parfitt to see if she was going shopping and needed any help.
‘No, dear. Dawn’s going to drive her mother and me out to one of those big shopping centres to get our heavy stuff. It’ll be a wonderful help. But how kind of you to remember me! I hope you’re still coming for some cookery lessons?’
‘I’d love to. Just tell me when it’s convenient, only not Wednesdays and another day. I’m not sure which yet because I’m changing to another class to avoid a boring lecturer. One of my friends told me you could do that.’
‘How about coming tomorrow? I can get the ingredients today. We said we’d make a fruit cake, didn’t we?’
‘That’d be great. Only you must let me buy my share of the ingredients.’
‘No, dear. You’ve enough on your plate. And we may have another student. Mr Sh—Dan wants to learn how to make cakes, too. I’ll give him a ring. Will one o’clock suit you? I’d like to go to church in the morning.’
‘One o’clock would be fine. I’m going to church too. Tidmas Street Church have a crèche for littlies and the people there are so friendly.’
‘I’ve always gone to the parish church. But I don’t know anyone in the congregation there any more. My mother would be horrified at me offering that as an excuse, but it does make a difference.’ She chuckled. ‘Especially on rainy days.’
Poor Miss Parfitt, Janey thought. She’d been under her mother’s thumb all her life, from the sounds of it, and she still felt guilty if she went against her mother’s rules. Janey’s mother always did what her father told her to. She was as unnoticeable as a piece of wallpaper.
Janey felt very pleased with the progress she’d made in the last few weeks in getting her life together. Surely he would leave her alone if she made it obvious she wasn’t going to cave in to him?
She picked up her baby and forgot her worries in giving her a tickle and a cuddle, which made them both laugh. Millie was growing so fast. Soon she’d be too big for this. Soon she’d be sitting unsupported, feeding herself, walking, talking. How wonderful to watch all those milestones!
They had an appointment next week at the child health clinic, so that Millie could be weighed and checked generally.
As she was going out, she knocked on Kieran’s door, hoping to catch him in so that she could leave the letter with him. The more she thought about the letter, the more certain she became that it would be a wise precaution. But no one answered the door.
She was walking slowly home from the supermarket, pushing a heavily laden buggy when a voice said, ‘You’ll need some help getting that up the stairs.’
And when she looked, he was there, standing right beside her, smiling.
She couldn’t move, could hardly breathe.
He wasn’t going to leave her alone!
Kieran grinned at Paul. ‘Here goes!’ He switched on the security system they’d just installed, waited a minute or two outside on the landing, then gestured to Paul. ‘You christen it.’
Paul walked inside. There was a thirty-second delay then it began to scream a warning. The noise was ear-piercing. No one could ignore that. ‘You should warn the other owners about this, and the neighbours, so that they can ring the police if it goes off while you’re out.’ He switched the alarm off. ‘Right, I’d better get back now. I’m taking your mother to the hospital. Will you be all right?’
‘Yes. I want to set up my computer properly and change our Internet connection to this phone number.’
‘Don’t go out on your own.’
Paul looked sharply at him. ‘You told Mum to be careful, too. Do you think William would really hurt us?’
‘Yes, I do. I haven’t been able to forget his expression when we were at your house. He looked wild and menacing. I’d not have liked to face him on my own, even before my accident.’
Paul shivered. ‘You don’t have to persuade me to be careful. It’s Mum you have to persuade. I’m worried sick about her. She doesn’t really believe he’d hurt her.’
‘Tha
t’s why I’m taking her to hospital, and she didn’t refuse, did she? I can park really close in a disabled bay.’ He grimaced at the thought. ‘See you.’
Kieran got into the car and drove the hundred yards or so to his flat. He wanted to change into something smarter before he met Nicole.
When he got near the flats, he slowed to a sudden stop and parked by the side of the road because a man was standing over Janey and she looked terrified. They didn’t seem to have noticed him, so he got out of the car and moved closer to them, staying behind a tree. Because he was wearing sneakers he could move silently.
As he stopped to watch, the man laid one hand on Janey’s arm, gripping it tightly. That was not a polite hold.
She wrenched away from him, standing defensively between him and the buggy.
He laughed at her and grabbed her arm again, throwing her aside so hard she staggered a few steps. Taking hold of the buggy handle, he began shaking it hard, making Millie cry in fear.
Janey didn’t move, staring at the man like a mouse trapped by a cat.
Kieran waited to see if he could learn anything more about this bully, who fortunately had his back to the street. The two others were so engrossed in their confrontation that neither of them noticed him and he was able to hear part of what they were saying.
‘Either you take me up to your flat and be a good little girl, or there will be an accident. It’s not hard to hurt a baby, and these buggies tip over so easily.’ He feigned tipping the buggy over and Janey shrieked in terror.
‘Don’t! Don’t! Why are you doing this? Haven’t you hurt me enough?’
The man laughed softly. ‘No. Not nearly enough. Now, move inside! I’ll bring her.’
This was clearly the man who’d raped Janey, the man she was so terrified of that she didn’t dare tell anyone who he was. He thought the fellow was taking a risk, coming after her in the daytime, but the street was very quiet, so he might have got away with it.
Kieran got out his mobile phone and took a photo, then the damn thing began warbling at him, and the man jerked round.
Kieran feigned answering the call, pretending not to be interested in them.
Janey grabbed the buggy and yanked it away from the man, who said loudly, ‘There, it’s working again. Told you I could fix it.’ He turned and walked away.
Kieran watched him move out of sight round the corner of High Street then moved across to Janey, who was standing weeping, near hysterics now.
‘Let’s go inside,’ he said gently.
‘I shan’t be safe even there. He’ll be back. I know he will. It’s only a matter of time before he catches me on my own.’
Kieran didn’t at first know what to say to that, then caught a glimpse of his watch. ‘Look, I have to go somewhere. Let’s get you and Millie inside first. If it’ll make you feel safer, you can stay in my flat till I get back.’
‘Can I? Really? I just have to nip up to get some food and nappies for Millie.’
He didn’t know whether he was doing the right thing leaving her in this upset state, but he needed to pick Nicole up and surely Janey would be safe in his flat?
He went in and studied the windows. He’d thought of getting sheer curtains to guard his privacy during the daytime but hadn’t bothered. Now he would. For the time being, he drew the curtains.
‘Don’t switch the lights on,’ she said. ‘I can see well enough. I don’t want the flat to look occupied.’
He hesitated by the door. ‘Janey, who was that man?’
‘Better if I don’t tell you.’
‘Better for me or better for you?’
‘Both.’
‘You’re that frightened of him?’
She nodded.
What was the world coming to? he thought as he drove off. How could this be happening in a sleepy little town like Sexton Bassett?
But he had enough contacts to find out who the brute was – and he would. He already knew his first name, Gary.
Energy surged through him, the same energy that had once carried him through investigations into companies and millionaires and criminal bosses.
He smiled, thinking, Welcome back.
Nicole stood on the steps outside the library, waiting for Kieran, who was a little late. She shivered in the cool air but that didn’t stop her enjoying its freshness after the rather stale air inside.
When his car drew up, she ran down the library steps, happy to see him, but his expression was so grim her happiness evaporated abruptly. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘When I got back to the flats, a man was there, bullying Janey. She looked terrified. He had hold of the buggy and was shaking it hard.’
‘Oh, no! Poor Millie. Did he run off when he saw you?’
‘No, he brazened it out, pretended he’d been fixing the buggy. I’ve seen him somewhere before, but I can’t place him. It’ll come to me, though. She refuses to tell me who he is, though she’s given me a letter revealing all, to be opened in case of trouble.’
‘Will she be safe on her own?’
‘I left her in my flat, as a temporary measure.’
She shook her head. ‘What’s wrong with the world? It’s getting so violent.’
‘I’m not sure it is, on average. The statistics don’t say so. I think it’s just that we hear about it more these days because we’re living in an age of information flow – and of course, violence is affecting both of us and our friends at the moment.’ He reached out to give her hand a squeeze. ‘I know William’s gone off the rails, but you’ll get past this into calmer waters.’
‘That time can’t come soon enough for me.’
When they got to the hospital she made no effort to leave the car. ‘I’m not looking forward to this.’
‘It must be hard.’
‘It’s not knowing what’s going to happen. Is he going to recover at all or … just get worse until he dies? If he recovers, I’ll have to look after him. And if he doesn’t, what am I going to do, with William running wild? I daren’t even go back to my own home.’
Kieran got out of the car and went round to open her door. When she got out, he pulled her into his arms and gave her a hug. It wasn’t a sexual gesture, just a comforting hug from a friend and she accepted it as such, leaning against him for a moment or two, drawing strength from him.
The warmth of that hug helped her walk into the hospital and up to the ward.
Sam wasn’t in his room. She hurried along to the nurses’ station and they showed her into a private room and fetched the ward sister.
‘I’m afraid the news isn’t good, Mrs Gainsford. Your husband is going downhill rapidly.’
Nicole stared at her incredulously. ‘You mean – he’s dying?’
‘Yes.’
‘How long does he have?’
‘You’ll need to ask the doctor that. He’ll be here in—’ she looked at her fob watch ‘about half an hour. In the meantime I’ll show you where your husband is. Perhaps you’d like to sit with him? I’ll bring the doctor to you there.’
Sam was lying flat on his back in a tiny, windowless room to one side. It was a room for patients who didn’t see or care about their surroundings. He looked like a wax effigy of her husband, no expression on his face, no movement.
‘I can’t believe it’s ending like this,’ she said aloud. ‘We didn’t even have time to make up our quarrel. Can you hear me, Sam? Or am I talking to myself?’ It felt as if she was and she didn’t speak again.
Time passed very slowly. She kept looking at her watch and finding that two or three minutes only had passed. She wondered if she should go and tell Kieran what she was waiting for, but if she did, she might miss the doctor. So she sat there, fretting internally, numb and motionless externally.
When the door opened, she looked round to see Kieran.
‘I came up to see how things were going. They told me. I’m so sorry.’
She nodded. ‘Would you stay with me? The doctor’s coming in a minute. I’m frightened I w
on’t remember what he says.’
‘Of course.’
The door opened a few minutes later and a man came in, introduced himself and looked at Kieran.
‘I’m a family friend, here to support Nicole.’
He nodded and turned back to her. ‘I’m afraid it’s not good news.’
‘No. So I gathered. But the nurses wouldn’t tell me any details.’
‘The tumour is affecting just about every function now. He’s not able to speak or move.’
‘Can he hear?’
‘We don’t think so. We can’t be sure, though, so it wouldn’t hurt for you to speak to him as if he can.’
‘What’s going to happen next?’
‘We look after him, make sure he’s in no pain. And we can either try to prolong his life or let nature take its course. Your choice. Do you want him put on a ventilator, if necessary?’
She shuddered, but there was no doubt in her mind. ‘No. I’m sure he wouldn’t want to linger in this state. He was – is a firm believer in euthanasia.’
The doctor made a note on his pad and moved towards the door. ‘You can visit him at any time, day or night.’
She sat very still, waiting for the door to close behind him, then turned towards the bed, feeling she had to say something – in case he could still hear. ‘I’ll be back later, Sam. I’ll bring Paul to see you. William has run away. If I can find him, I’ll send him too.’
It made her shiver that he didn’t respond by so much as the blink of an eyelid. She’d had as much as she could take, so turned towards the door, reaching out for it blindly, her vision blurred by tears. She was aware of Kieran’s arm round her shoulders, aware of the cool air hitting her cheeks as they went out of the hospital, then remembered nothing till they arrived back at her flat.
Paul opened the door and stood aside to let her in. She wanted to reassure him, but couldn’t.
Time seemed to be moving jerkily. She found that she was sitting on the couch. How had she got there? Paul and Kieran were sitting nearby, watching her anxiously.
‘Sorry. I was just – a bit overwhelmed. Thank you for bringing me home, Kieran. I can’t go back to work. Not now.’