He scans the room quickly and then lets his mouth slack open in what you think is awe. “You—you did all this? Just now?”
You nod and look at your handiwork proudly. “Yep! Not bad, huh?”
“Not bad? Are you kidding? Dude, you rule! Mrs. O’Donnell is gonna flip when she gets back.” He goes on to explain that the librarian has been so cool to him that he decided to repay her by volunteering to keep an eye on the library a few times a week, but it’s a bigger job than he bargained for. Wow. You were acting like you had received the worst punishment on earth, and Joey was here helping out just to be nice. All this time you’d thought popular jocks like him didn’t do anything without a cheering section behind them. If you hadn’t gotten in trouble today, you never would have even known that Joey isn’t like that at all. His status as a secret do-gooder is suddenly way more interesting to you than the fact that he’s a hottie.
“Well, I’m glad I could help,” you tell Joey, who is still looking around and rubbing his neck in utter disbelief. “But I should get going. I’ve got a cell phone to rescue!”
You strike a superhero pose for a second and then fly out of the library as if you’re Supergirl. Out of the corner of your eye, you see him grin, revealing a few crooked teeth. But you have no time to dwell on Joey’s adorable smile. If you hurry, you can make it to the teachers’ lounge before the lunch period is over.
When you barge into the teachers’ lounge, Ms. Krell is just about to take a huge bite out of her tuna salad sandwich.
“Ms. Krell!” you shout a little too loudly, scaring your history teacher so badly that she drops her sandwich onto the table, sending squirts of tuna fish flying everywhere. Oops.
“Sorry,” you mutter softly, wincing at your bad timing.
Ms. Krell regains her composure, though, calmly reaching for a napkin and wiping down the table. “Ah, yes, the girl who thinks texting is more important than learning history. I assume you are done with the cleaning assignment in the library?” She gives you an ice-cold glare that almost makes your teeth chatter.
“Y-yes, ma’am,” you stutter. “And I just want to say that I’m really, really sorry. I know I shouldn’t have been using my phone during class, and it’ll never ever happen again.”
“Hmph!” Ms. Krell grunts. “If I had a nickel for every time a student promised me that…” She trails off, maybe fantasizing about what she would do if she really did have all those nickels. You’re guessing she would have enough for a luxury vacation in Paris. But you’re still not convinced that teachers even exist outside of school, let alone in fancy hotels in France.
“I know, I know,” you agree. “You’d be rich. But I really mean it.” You cross your heart with your index finger and then hold up your hand as if taking an oath. Then you flash her what you hope is your sincerest smile.
Ms. Krell casts a cool, appraising eye over you, sizing you up. Apparently you pass the test, because she gives you a small nod and then reaches into her purse, pulling out your precious Sidekick. Hello, old friend!
You reach for it, but Ms. Krell snatches it away, holding it just out of your reach. “Before I give you this phone,” she says stiffly, “I want you to understand that I am only giving it back because you are usually one of my best students, so I can only assume this infraction was caused by temporary insanity.”
As Lena would say back when she was quoting Shakespeare all the time, Temporary insanity, thy name is Mona! You know better than to make a joke right now, though. You simply nod in agreement and stare at the green linoleum tile.
“Next time I won’t be so lenient. Do I make myself clear?” She holds out the phone to you and you pocket it quickly, before she has a chance to change her mind.
“Yes, Ms. Krell. Thank you, thank you, thank you…you won’t regret this!” you cry, backing out of the teachers’ lounge.
Yes! You got past that temporary roadblock and you have your phone back. Thank goodness too. You head to your next class, checking your phone as you walk, and it looks like you have missed a ton of messages. Most are pretty run-of-the-mill—Lena updating you on her latest blog interviewee, Jessie complaining about how cold it is in the girls’ bathroom, Amy Choi begging you to confirm the rumor that you’d been expelled and enrolled in military school. You know, the usual. But one text stops you cold. It’s from Lizette.
Heard Mona will B singing U B
Long w Me. Isn’t that UR song?
What? Of course that’s your song. This is no coincidence. Mona is obviously trying to steal your thunder. But how did she even know what song…? Oh, that’s right. You actually blabbed that info yourself when she started bugging you in history class. So that’s what all the texting was about. She was just setting a trap for you, and you fell right into it. Perfect. If you didn’t feel like a sucker before, you definitely feel like one now.
Mona wins again. Thanks to her, you had to spend your lunch period cleaning instead of eating and catching up with your buds. And even though that led to a brief encounter with the cute (and surprisingly sweet) Joey, it also led to your having to grovel to get your phone back. But the worst had yet to come. Mona is planning to use your song for the audition! Since she signed up before you, she’ll get to sing it first, which means you’ll look like a lame copycat at best. Given the situation, is there any possible way this can work out for you? Your attitude could mean everything, so take the quiz to find out what that is.
QUIZ TIME!
Circle your answers and tally up the points at the end.
You are going to the hospital tomorrow to have your tonsils taken out. How do you feel?
Great. It would be silly to feel nervous. The surgery you’re having is routine and no big deal. Plus you’re pretty sure you’ll get to eat your weight in ice cream and Jell-O over the next few days. You’ll be just fine.
You are understandably a little jittery. (After all, any surgery involves some risk.) But you know a bunch of people who’ve gone through it and they’re all okay, so you probably will be too.
You are kind of freaking out, even after asking your doctor a zillion questions. You trust him and all, but what if something goes wrong? (You may not be entirely sure what your tonsils do, but it can’t be a good thing to have them removed.)
You are in major panic mode. What if they take out your voice box instead of your tonsils and you can never talk again? Aaaaagh!
You’re reading an exciting new book and one of the chapters ends on a cliff-hanger with the main character in big trouble. Are you worried?
Not at all. You know she’ll find some brilliant way out of the mess. She always does.
A little. She’s in a real bind. But if anyone can find a way out, she can.
Definitely. You have no idea how you would get out of that jam. You doubt she’ll find a way, but since there is a small glimmer of hope, you read on and keep your fingers crossed.
Very. No way is she getting out of this one. You don’t even bother reading the rest of the book because you can tell it won’t have a happy ending.
Your parents have planned a family cross-country trip in an RV. You think it’ll be:
awesome! You’ll get to ride around in an RV, spend lots of time with your fam, and see all the different states. Plus you can send your friends goofy postcards from each stop. You can’t wait!
okay. You’re a little worried about getting cabin fever (and taking regular showers), but for the most part it’ll be great. Anything that goes wrong will just make for some funny stories later.
fun part of the time, but really long car trips can be a drag. And to be honest, you’d rather lie out on the beach than see the Grand Canyon. But for your family’s sake, you’ll grin and bear it.
awful! You’ll probably get motion sickness, your little bro is bound to get on your nerves, and you’ll be away from your friends for weeks. If you could just stay home, you would.
Your best friend just told you she’ll be moving away next month and is really upset abo
ut it. You tell her that:
you’ll end up writing and talking on the phone even more than you do now! There will be so much more to talk about since you’ll be at different schools. And you can always visit. Her move might actually bring you closer!
the two of you can keep in touch through Facebook and Twitter. It won’t be as good as getting to hang in person every day, but it’s the next best thing.
you’ll stay in contact for a while, but it’ll be too hard to keep in touch for long. So you’d better prepare yourselves for the inevitable.
you’ll probably never see or talk to each other again. People always say they’ll keep in touch, but they never actually do. You might as well say your good-byes now.
While riding your bike in the park, you fell and broke your leg—right before your prom! How do you feel?
Actually, you think it’s pretty cool. All your friends will want to sign your cast, and making up dances that you can do on crutches might be funny. (All the attention and sympathy you’ll get will just be icing on the cake.)
Not too bad. It is terrible timing, but you know your friends will help you get around. And if you sit most of the night, no one will even notice that your cast clashes with your dress.
It’s kind of a bummer. You were really hoping to wear your cute kitten-heeled shoes, but you’ll be wearing a huge clunky white cast instead. Still, it could have been worse. You could’ve broken both legs!
It stinks. There’s no way you’ll have a good time now, so you might as well skip it.
Give yourself 1 point for every time you answered A, 2 points for every B, 3 points for every C, and 4 points for every D.
—If you scored between 5 and 12, go to Chapter 18.
—If you scored between 13 and 20, go to Chapter 17.
From Chapter 8: You are as loyal as they come. Even when it’s hard (or extremely embarrassing) to stand by your friends and family, you always do, making sure they know you’ve got their backs. That’s probably why you like dogs so much—they stay true-blue to their owners. And the people you care about can trust you to be just as true to them. As long as you aren’t pledging your loyalty to the wrong people, it’s a great quality to have.
From Chapter 10: Congratulations! You are a born leader. Never one to wait around for someone else to take charge, you prefer to step up to the plate and show others what to do. You would make an excellent CEO, coach, teacher, or entrepreneur. Just be aware that you aren’t always the only one who wants to take the reins. Being a good team player is often just as important as being able to lead the way.
Clearly, Jessie has lost her mind. Nothing else could explain her accusing you of lying to her because you’re jealous. But Jessie has been your friend since forever, and no way are you letting her crash and burn in front of the whole school just because she’s gone temporarily bananas. Somehow you’ve got to prove to her that what you’re saying about Lisa and Maria setting her up to fail is true.
Okay, what you decide to do next is so unlike you, and if there were any other way you would do it. But desperate times call for desperate measures. You take out your Sidekick and text the one person you know could help you, asking her to meet you in the girls’ bathroom in the basement. Hardly anyone ever uses that one, so you know you’ll have some privacy. She immediately texts back, saying she’ll meet you in the bathroom in five.
You get there first, making it down to the basement in record time. And it’s no wonder this bathroom doesn’t get used very often. It’s freezing in there! And it’s so out of the way that the janitorial staff seems to pretty much ignore it too. There are cobwebs forming in the corners of the ceiling, and half the stalls are missing toilet paper. If this were a crime novel, you’d be the nervous detective, waiting to meet up with a shifty informant.
Of course, you’ve never read about an informant that hopes to be on E! one day, telling the world all the latest juicy celebrity gossip. You have been waiting for only a few minutes when the door swings open and Amy Choi walks in.
“Hey!” she says excitedly, her eyes darting around as if she expects flashing cameras or something. “What’s going on? You never call to tell me stuff. This must be good!”
“I don’t know if ‘good’ is the word I’d use,” you say sullenly, rubbing your arms for warmth. You have broken out in goose bumps everywhere, partially from the draft in the basement and partially because you’re remembering the big fight you and Jessie had earlier. You aren’t used to not being on speaking terms with your best friend. It doesn’t feel good at all. “I need your help, Amy.”
Amy nods, as if she gets asked for help all the time and this doesn’t surprise her in the least. “Okay,” she says, brushing her bangs out of her eyes. “What can I do?”
You take a deep breath. “Well, I overheard Lisa and Maria talking about how they were going to get Jessie to make a fool of herself at the audition today. Only, Jessie doesn’t believe me! They’re being super nice to her, so she thinks they’re her friends and that I’m just jealous. Can you believe that?” You feel yourself getting angry all over again.
But Amy doesn’t look outraged at all. She rubs her chin with one delicate hand. “Well…are you?” she asks.
“Of course not!” you shout. Your voice bounces off the walls and echoes back to you, sounding less convincing every time. Okay, maybe you are kind of jealous that Jessie had the guts to audition and you didn’t. And maybe seeing the cool girls accept Jessie into their clique while completely ignoring you did sting a little bit. But if Lisa and Maria are the kind of friends that come with being popular, you’ll stick to being a nobody, thanks.
“Okay, okay,” Amy says quickly. “Just checking. So what do you need me to do?”
“I know you have a really good video recorder in your phone.” The better to make embarrassing YouTube videos of your classmates with, you stop yourself from saying. “If I can get Lisa and Maria to admit what they’re up to, can you record it for me?”
“Sure!” Amy answers with zero hesitation. This is right up her alley. “But how are you going to get them to admit anything on video?”
You smile slowly, remembering your little hideout in the auditorium. “Just leave it to me.”
After your next class you pace near Maria’s and Lisa’s lockers. You know they’ll come by to drop off the humongous history textbooks they needed for the last period. And this time instead of hiding you plan to confront them.
“How long do I have to sit like this?” Amy complains from the same seat in the auditorium you hid in not too long ago. “My back is cramping and I’m missing out on all the between-classes talk!”
“Shh!” you hiss. “Not too much longer. Here they come!”
You try your best to contain your anger as you spot Maria and Lisa coming toward you, each hugging a heavy textbook to her chest. When Maria sees you leaning against her locker, her dark brown eyes narrow suspiciously. Her straight black hair swings to the left as she leans over to whisper something in Lisa’s ear. She looks in your direction suddenly, no doubt wondering what lowly you would have to talk to them about.
“What are you doing in front of my locker?” Maria asks snottily.
“Well, Maria,” you speak up, hoping Amy is getting all this, “I just wanted you guys to know that Jessie is my friend, and giving her bad advice so that she’ll do lousy at the auditions really stinks.”
Lisa gives you an appraising look, seeming to decide that this must be a lucky guess. No way could you know what they had planned. “I have no clue what you’re talking about.”
Hmm…you hadn’t banked on them denying everything. Time to switch tactics a bit.
You look them both up and down. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. It would be crazy for me to think you two could come up with something that smart. It probably makes your brains hurt just to get out of bed in the morning.”
“Hey!” Maria says, getting in your face now. “I’m plenty smart. Your friend is the dumb one for actually being st
upid enough to believe she sounds good singing that Taylor Swift song. Once she follows our advice and screeches out that sappy chorus, they’ll beg Mona to sing the solo.”
Lisa pinches Maria to shut her up, but Maria just says “Ow!” and keeps on going. “She even thinks we’re her BFFs now! As if. She’s so gullible.”
“Maybe so,” you reply. “But at least she has real BFFs to back her up. And when I tell her what you’re up to, we’ll choose a better song for her and demolish Mona at the auditions!”
“Oh yeah?” Lisa says. “And why would she believe you? It’s your word against—”
“Actually,” Amy interrupts, popping up from her auditorium hiding place, “it’s your word against this video. Say cheese!” She holds up her phone, showing them that she’s been videotaping the whole ugly exchange.
The last thing on the video is an image of Maria and Lisa looking into Amy’s videophone and turning bright red.
“Sorry we had to show you that,” you say to Jessie, handing the phone back to Amy. “But you wouldn’t believe me.”
Jessie slides down into a seat in the empty auditorium, where you asked her to meet you before the last class of the day. “So…none of the girls were being nice to me because they liked me?” Jessie moans.
“Well, I think Shawna and Dionne and some of the others are genuinely nice. They weren’t in on this. It was all Lisa and Maria’s idea. And they only did it so that Mona would be less of a brat.”
Your Life, but Cooler Page 11