I dial her number and listen to it ring and ring, and right when I think that she won’t answer, I get a very groggy, “Hello?”
“Hey, I know you’re pissed at me, but I need you. Can you come get me?”
“Kat, it is too damn early. I just went to bed a couple hours ago, what do you want? You know I really am pissed at you, so why should I come to your rescue again?”
“I am at James’ apartment above the coffee shop. I need to talk to you. Bren, please. I can’t be here.”
“Why not? What trouble have you gotten yourself into now?”
“I was at the hospital last night. Please can you come get me?”
“Are you okay? What happened?”
“I am okay but I need to make you understand what is going on with me. I am ready to talk to only you.”
“So talk.”
“Bren, I would really rather you come and get me and then I will tell you everything. Park in the alley behind The Java, and I will meet you. I don’t care what you are wearing I just need you. I need to get out of here. You were right, he said he wants to love me, but I am not loveable. Please just come and get me,” I beg.
“I’ll be there as soon as I can. I will text you when I am near.”
“Thank you, I love you. You are the best friend I ever had.”
“You know it!”
As I hang up with her, I can hear her jumping into action to get ready to leave and rescue me. Some people would probably think I am crazy leaving this guy behind. He wants to love me, but I can’t have him do that. I can’t have him love me the way I am. I have nothing to offer, I would just drag him down.
Twenty minutes later, I get a text just as James comes in the door. Shit, I think to myself, he wasn’t supposed to come back up here. I was supposed to just slink away without a trace.
“Kat, how are you feeling?” he asks as he walks in my direction.
“Good, much better. There is almost no pain at all anymore.” I get up and go to the bathroom to text Bren back.
Kat: Change of plans come in the second door in the alley, upstairs top floor.
Bren: Okay be right there
I walk back out to the living room right as she knocks on the door. I grab my bag and walk right by him, ignoring the confused look on his face as I go straight to the door. I don’t say a word to him as I walk out and down the stairs with Bren following me.
“What was that about, Kat? He looked like you just kicked his puppy.”
“He didn’t know I was leaving. I’m no good for him. You will understand soon enough why that is.”
“Okay, if you say so.”
We get into Bren’s car, and she drives away. I look behind me to see him standing at his door looking like he was going to yell for me. I turn back around with a tear in my eye and ignore the look on his face.
“Where to, Kat?” Bren asks.
“Anywhere we can talk in private will work. It’s a nice day. Why don’t we go to the park by your house? The one by the water.” The one he saved me from last night.
We get to the park I was talking about, and she puts her car in park. I decide I need to walk around in the open space and get out of the car, so I walk toward the water where James found me the night before. I stand there in silence as Bren comes up to me and stands next to me in silence too. A few minutes go by and I take a huge breath, preparing myself to tell all.
“Bren? I don’t know where to start.”
“How about at the beginning?”
“Okay, well, you know that first party you brought me to? That is where it all changed.”
“Go on.”
“Well, that night I did too much of everything. I snorted coke for the first time on top of smoking weed and drinking. I had never held the attention of a boy before—I was a virgin, actually. That night, Trent started talking to me, started kissing me. He started to touch me, and I was physically weak from being high. I was so messed up I barely knew where I was. Hell, until last night, I wasn’t sure of his name. I tried to push him off of me, but I failed. Bren, Trent raped me, stole my virginity, and has been following me the past couple weeks too. This is why I reacted the way I did last night.” I have tears streaming down my face at this point, and I take a chance and look at Bren’s face to see her reaction. She has tears forming in her eyes. “I didn’t want this. I didn’t want my first time to be like this, to end up pregnant. To barely remember what happened. I remember it was him, though; I can’t get his face out of my nightmares.”
Bren has a look of shock and sadness on her face. Maybe it’s pity, I don’t know.
“This is what has been going on with you for so long? Why didn’t you ever say anything to me? I love you like a sister. I am always on your side, well, except for last night. I was being selfish last night.” She wraps her arms around me and we sink to the ground together. Then, while wiping the tears from her eyes, she asks, “What happened to your face, anyway? And why did you go to the hospital?”
“James found me, here, actually, sitting on the edge of the cliff. He saved me from I don’t know what, jumping, falling accidentally on purpose, I don’t know, but he did. I wasn’t right in my head last night. He took me back to his place and told me exactly what you thought he would tell me. He thinks he is falling in love with me. I freaked out and took off and ended up being pulled into an alley between two buildings. It was Trent who pulled me and he got in my face and told me not to tell anyone about that night. He smacked me in the face and then when I was down on the ground he kicked me in my stomach. James found me again and took me back to his place and put me in his bed. I fell asleep soon after that but woke up with sharp pains in my stomach. James brought me to the ER.”
Bren pulls back and looks me right in the eyes. “Trent did this to you? Oh, my God, I never would have suspected he would be like that, do something like that. I can’t believe I wanted to hook up with him and I got pissed at you about him last night. You should have told me about all this sooner. Last night never would have happened, and you would have been safe in my house.”
She wraps her arms around me again and we sit there crying together for a while.
“We have to tell someone about this. You can’t live in fear of him because he keeps popping up. What if he does some serious damage the next time he corners you?”
“I can’t for that reason alone, but I also don’t want anyone to know. I don’t want James to know. I am no good for him, I am damaged. It isn’t fair to him. James just needs to walk away from me as much as I would love to let him love me.”
“What did they say at the hospital this morning? Is everything okay?”
“I am supposed to rest and stay off my feet for a few days, and James wanted me to stay with him. James knows I’m pregnant. I feel like a fool. I could have had a nice thing with him, and it is ruined. My life is ruined. This has ruined my life.” I point to my stomach. “But this part I wouldn’t change. I have pictures of the baby.”
“Let me see them,” she squeals like an excited school girl who just got her first date.
I pull out the strip of pictures and show her. She gets as emotional about them as I did when I saw my baby on the monitor.
“As much as this is exciting, we need to do something. Your mom left this morning on her honeymoon thinking that you were at my house. She cares, I just don’t think she reacted the best way. For now, you can stay with me at my house, but, we will have to tell my parents something. You will start to show soon. Actually, you are already starting to look a little on the fat side,” she jokes.
“Gee, thanks! Give me a few more days. We will talk to your parents soon. I promise.”
I have my best friend back, and I start to feel wanted again. I felt wanted by James but I don’t deserve his want. Bren has been with me from the beginning, and now she knows the truth. I feel better now that I have talked to her. We get up and go back to her car to head to her house. Once I am in and seated, I look at my phone; I have a ton of text
messages from a contact named James<3. When did I get his number? I think to myself then realize he must have put his number in my phone at some point. The first message is from me to him with a <3
Kat: <3
James<3: why did you leave? Are you okay?
James<3 Kat where are you?
James<3 Please come back and talk to me
James<3 Kat I’m worried about you
James<3 Kat please talk to me I’m going crazy here
James<3 I love you please talk to me
I cry as I read that last message. I turn my phone off as Bren looks over to me with worry in her eyes.
“You okay?”
“No. How can he love me when he doesn’t even know me?”
“You are going to have to talk to him. I don’t think there is a way around it at this point, but not now. Right now, we need to get you to my house and get some rest, both of us.”
I turn my head to look out the window as she pulls onto the main road toward her house and just stare at the world moving by. We are at her house within minutes and she is ushering me in like I am breakable into her room and down on her bed.
“Go to sleep. I’m going to go get a drink, and I will be back to take a nap with you. “
I lie there with my eyes wide open—I don’t know when I will sleep again, I have too many nightmares to contend with. I do eventually fall asleep, and when I wake up, I realize it is after lunch time and Bren is sitting on the edge of the bed with some water and Tylenol for the headache she assumes I have. I take the Tylenol and drink the water then I decide I should turn my phone back on. I have one more message then I did before.
James<3 Please talk to me
I reply back to him this time with a simple sentence.
Kat<3 I’m fine with Bren
I hit send and turn my phone off again. He isn’t something I feel like dealing with today. I’m not sure when I will be ready to deal with him, in fact. I may not know him well, but the parts I do know I do kinda love. I just can’t deal with that right now.
James
I go running out the door, but I’m too late—the car door shuts and they are off. I don’t even have time to yell after her. She said she would give me today. She said she would stay. What changed?
I try texting her over and over with no answer. While she was sleeping the night before, I put my number into her phone and sent myself a text so I had hers. I am going crazy wanting to know why she left and if she is okay. I finally text her that I love her and get a response back.
Kat<3: I’m fine with Bren
Well, at least I know she’s safe, but I still want to know why she left. I leave it alone for now and decide to go back to work and try to get my head together. This girl has me crazy, angry, enraged, and in love.
I walk into the shop and head over to the counter to make myself a coffee. I feel my employees looking at me, but they don’t say a word. I must be omitting a vibe that says to stay away. I go into the office and try and work. Instead, I sit there and start thinking about the past twenty-four hours and how horribly wrong they went.
I woke up yesterday excited that I was going to be able to finally act on my feelings for Kat and give her the present I had for her. A beautiful, small, emerald pendant on a delicate chain. I never got the chance to give it to her because of everything that happened at the party, and then when I was talking to her last night she spooked and ran. Add in her getting hurt and then going to the ER. And the big one, finding out she is actually pregnant. I don’t know how I feel about that; I don’t like it, but I want to be there for her. I want to find the guy that hurt her and smash his face in and bring him to his knees. I want to find the guy that got her pregnant and ask why he isn’t helping her. I want to hold her in my arms and never let her go.
I want, I want, I want.
I wish I understood why I feel so connected to her. Why I can’t get her out of my head. She is beautiful and sweet, and now her eyes have gone dark when before they were bright and full of life. I want to be the one to put the life back into her eyes.
I’m not good for her, though. I have my own demons inside of me. My parents are dead, my life before this one wasn’t pretty. I was able to snap out of it as soon as I heard they died and stopped doing drugs, but I still have bad people in my life. I try to stay away from them the best I can, but my parents brought me into that world the second they left it.
My parents lived in Boston; they were connected to the Mob Family on the East End and not connected in a good way. Both of my parents were known by The Family—my mom was a waitress and my dad did the books for this club. The problem was, my mom caught the eye of one of the family members and there was no saying no to him. He wanted her, married or not. This was before I was born, about nine months before I was born. So, I later found out my dad wasn’t my dad, my mom fell in love with this Mob Family member and my dad was left to fend for himself, never gaining any rank. My family was a lie, and my real dad wants me to go to Boston and be a part of that life. I refused, and took the money he made sure my mom had and got myself cleaned up and bought this building. I started a fresh life. Still, to this day, I have someone stop in and check on me, asking the never-ending question of when I will come join The Family and the never-ending answer of I won’t be. I don’t like to be connected to them in this way and not many people know that I do. If they want me in so badly, I can’t let them know about Kat. I can’t let them into her world. If I want her in my world, then they will be in hers.
I sit there and decide I won’t be getting any work done, so I finish my coffee and walk back out to the shop where I see Jayce walking in the door.
“Hey, boss, awesome party last night at Bren’s house, wasn’t it?”
“I didn’t stay long, but it looked like a lot of fun.”
“I noticed. What happened? Both you and Kat disappeared last night.”
“Kat wasn’t feeling good, so I took her down to the park.”
He had a look like he wanted to punch me cross his face, then it disappeared.
I knew he wanted to get together with her, but I also knew it wasn’t going to happen.
“How did you end up taking her?” he questions.
“I ran into her, and she wanted to get away and asked me to get her out of there,” I lie. “So I took her to the park and we talked for a little while. I brought her back to Bren’s house.”
I sure as hell can’t tell this guy what all happened last night. I can’t tell him that I think I’m in love with her, and I sure as hell can’t declare her mine. Not yet.
“I’m heading out for the rest of the day. Call if you need anything, Jayce. I’ll be back later to close up.” I always do the books, and I always do the deposit. That is something The Family taught me: don’t trust anyone with your money. I head out the door and start walking. I need to take a walk and get my head on straight, so I head to the park where I saw Kat that first time.
Katarina
Bren pushes me into her bathroom to take a shower, then she turns the water on for me and grabs a towel.
“Take a shower, Kat, you will feel better.” And then she leaves me alone.
I take my clothes off and step into the shower and let the water flow over me just as the tears start to flow too. I can’t stop them; they just keep coming. I look down at my stomach and notice I have some bruising. I don’t even want to look at my face. With everything going on, I am just spent. I sit in the shower and sob for I don’t know how long. I feel the water start to cool and stand up before I run some conditioner through my hair and wash my body then rinse everything. Stepping out of the shower, I wrap the towel around me and avoid the mirror. Once I am dry, I walk out of her bathroom and notice Bren has laid out some clothes for me—a pair of yoga pants and a T shirt I didn’t realize I had. It was James’. I get dressed and head out to the kitchen where I hear Bren talking with her mom. They both turn and look at me, but Sandy gasps. Then it hits me: my face.
“Hi, is
it really that bad?”
“Oh, gosh, sweetie, what happened to your face?” Sandy asks.
“She had a run-in last night, Mom, after she left here with James.”
She is quick to reply, “Did he do this to you?”
“No, it most definitely wasn’t James,” Bren defends.
Bren takes a look at me, and at this point I know we have to tell her mom. I don’t want to, but I don’t have a choice. I look at Bren and nod my head; she knows that it is okay to speak.
“Mom, we have a lot to tell you, but please listen to everything.”
“Okay, I will listen. Start talking. I am responsible for Kat while her mom is out of town on her honeymoon. Do I need to call her?”
“My mom knows part of what is going on, and really that was what our fight was about last night. She kicked me out of the house Friday when she found out. So I guess I am responsible for myself now.”
With a look of shock on her face, her eyes pop open wide. “She did what? Why would she do that?”
“She doesn’t know the entire story. I wasn’t ready to tell it. Heck, I almost lost Bren over not telling her the truth. That is why I left last night and James found me at the park down the street. I was with James last night at his apartment. You both were right. He said he wants to love me. I spooked and took off from his building and was in an alley when I was attacked, hit in the face, and kicked in the stomach. He left me on the ground. James found me again as I was stumbling out of the alley. He brought me back to his place and put me to bed. I wouldn’t tell him anything, especially with the rage I saw in his eyes.”
The Night He Saved Me Page 8