LETTER XL
MR. LOVELACE[IN CONTINUATION.]TUESDAY AFTERNOON, AUG. 29.
I went back, in this part of our conversation, to the day that I wasobliged to come down to attend my Lord in the dangerous illness whichsome feared would have been his last.
I told the Colonel, 'what earnest letters I had written to a particularfriend, to engage him to prevail upon the lady not to slip a day that hadbeen proposed for the private celebration of our nuptials; and of myletters* written to her on that subject;' for I had stepped to my closet,and fetched down all the letters and draughts and copies of lettersrelating to this affair.
* See Vol. VI. Letters XXXVII. XXXVIII. XXXIX. XLIII.
I read to him, 'several passages in the copies of those letters, which,thou wilt remember, make not a little to my honour.' And I told him,'that I wished I had kept copies of those to my friend on the sameoccasion; by which he would have seen how much in earnest I was in myprofessions to her, although she would not answer one of them;' and thoumayest remember, that one of those four letters accounted to herself whyI was desirous she should remain where I had left her.*
* See Vol. VI. Letter XXXVII.
I then proceeded to give him an account 'of the visit made by Lady Sarahand Lady Betty to Lord M. and me, in order to induce me to do herjustice: of my readiness to comply with their desires; and of their highopinion of her merit: of the visit made to Miss Howe by my cousinsMontague, in the name of us all, to engage her interest with her friendin my behalf: of my conversation with Miss Howe, at a private assembly,to whom I gave the same assurances, and besought her interest with herfriend.'
I then read a copy of the letter (though so much to my disadvantage)which was written to her by Miss Charlotte Montague, Aug. 1,* entreatingher alliance in the names of all our family.
* See Vol. VII. Letter LXVI.
This made him ready to think that his fair cousin carried her resentmentagainst me too far. He did not imagine, he said, that either myself orour family had been so much in earnest.
So thou seest, Belford, that it is but glossing over one part of a story,and omitting another, that will make a bad cause a good one at any time.What an admirable lawyer should I have made! And what a poor hand wouldthis charming creature, with all her innocence, have made of it in acourt of justice against a man who had so much to say and to show forhimself!
I then hinted at the generous annual tender which Lord M. and his sistersmade to his fair cousin, in apprehension that she might suffer by herfriends' implacableness.
And this also the Colonel highly applauded, and was pleased to lament theunhappy misunderstanding between the two families, which had made theHarlowes less fond of an alliance with a family of so much honour as thisinstance showed ours to be.
I then told him, 'That having, by my friend, [meaning thee,] who wasadmitted into her presence, (and who had always been an admirer of hervirtues, and had given me such advice from time to time in relation toher as I wished I had followed,) been assured that a visit from me wouldbe very disagreeable to her, I once more resolved to try what a letterwould do; and that, accordingly, on the seventh of August, I wrote herone.
'This, Colonel, is the copy of it. I was then out of humour with my LordM. and the ladies of my family. You will, therefore, read it toyourself.'*
* See Vol. VII. Letter LXXIX.
This letter gave him high satisfaction. You write here, Mr. Lovelace,from your heart. 'Tis a letter full of penitence and acknowledgement.Your request is reasonable--To be forgiven only as you shall appear todeserve it after a time of probation, which you leave to her to fix.Pray, Sir, did she return an answer to this letter?
She did, but with reluctance, I own, and not till I had declared by myfriend, that, if I could not procure one, I would go up to town, andthrow myself at her feet.
I wish I might be permitted to see it, Sir, or to hear such parts of itread as you shall think proper.
Turning over my papers, Here it is, Sir.* I will make no scruple to putit into your hands.
This is very obliging, Mr. Lovelace.
He read it. My charming cousin!--How strong her resentments!--Yet howcharitable her wishes!--Good Heaven! that such an excellent creature--But, Mr. Lovelace, it is to your regret, as much as to mine, I doubt not--
Interrupting him, I swore that it was.
So it ought, said he. Nor do I wonder that it should be so. I shalltell you by-and-by, proceeded he, how much she suffers with her friendsby false and villanous reports. But, Sir, will you permit me to takewith me these two letters? I shall make use of them to the advantage ofyou both.
I told him I would oblige him with all my heart. And this he took verykindly (as he had reason); and put them in his pocket-book, promising toreturn hem in a few days.
I then told him, 'That upon this her refusal, I took upon myself to go totown, in hopes to move her in my favour; and that, though I went withoutgiving her notice of my intention, yet had she got some notion of mycoming, and so contrived to be out of the way: and at last, when shefound I was fully determined at all events to see her, before I wentabroad, (which I shall do, said I, if I cannot prevail upon her,) shesent me the letter I have already mentioned to you, desiring me tosuspend my purposed visit: and that for a reason which amazes andconfounds me; because I don't find there is any thing in it: and yet Inever knew her once dispense with her word; for she always made it amaxim, that it was not lawful to do evil, that good might come of it: andyet in this letter, for no reason in the world but to avoid seeing me (togratify an humour only) has she sent me out of town, depending upon theassurance she had given me.'
Col. This is indeed surprising. But I cannot believe that my cousin,for such an end only, or indeed for any end, according to the character Ihear of her, should stoop to make use of such an artifice.
Lovel. This, Colonel, is the thing that astonishes me; and yet, seehere!--This is the letter she wrote me--Nay, Sir, 'tis her own hand.
Col. I see it is; and a charming hand it is.
Lovel. You observe, Colonel, that all her hopes of reconciliation withher parents are from you. You are her dear blessed friend! She alwaystalked of you with delight.
Col. Would to Heaven I had come to England before she leftHarlowe-place!--Nothing of this had then happened. Not a man of thosewhom I have heard that her friends proposed for her should have had her.Nor you, Mr. Lovelace, unless I had found you to be the man every one whosees you must wish you to be: and if you had been that man, no one livingshould I have preferred to you for such an excellence.
My Lord and I both joined in the wish: and 'faith I wished it mostcordially.
The Colonel read the letter twice over, and then returned it to me. 'Tisall a mystery, said he. I can make nothing of it. For, alas! herfriends are as averse to a reconciliation as ever.
Lord M. I could not have thought it. But don't you think there issomething very favourable to my nephew in this letter--something thatlooks as if the lady would comply at last?
Col. Let me die if I know what to make of it. This letter is verydifferent from her preceding one!--You returned an answer to it, Mr.Lovelace?
Lovel. An answer, Colonel! No doubt of it. And an answer full oftransport. I told her, 'I would directly set out for Lord M.'s, inobedience to her will. I told her that I would consent to any thing sheshould command, in order to promote this happy reconciliation. I toldher that it should be my hourly study, to the end of my life, to deservea goodness so transcendent.' But I cannot forbear saying that I am not alittle shocked and surprised, if nothing more be meant by it than to getme into the country without seeing her.
Col. That can't be the thing, depend upon it, Sir. There must be morein it than that. For, were that all, she must think you would soon beundeceived, and that you would then most probably resume your intention--unless, indeed, she depended upon seeing me in the interim, as she knew Iwas arrived. But I own I know not what to make of it. Only that shedoes me a
great deal of honour, if it be me that she calls her dearblessed friend, whom she always loved and honoured. Indeed I ever lovedher: and if I die unmarried, and without children, shall be as kind toher as her grandfather was: and the rather, as I fear there is too muchof envy and self-love in the resentments her brother and sister endeavourto keep up in her father and mother against her. But I shall know betterhow to judge of this, when my cousin James comes from Edinburgh; and heis every hour expected.
But let me ask you, Mr. Lovelace, what is the name of your friend, who isadmitted so easily into my cousin's presence? Is it not Belford, pray?
Lovel. It is, Sir; and Mr. Belford's a man of honour; and a greatadmirer of your fair cousin.
Was I right, as to the first, Jack? The last I have such strong proofof, that it makes me question the first; since she would not have beenout of the way of my intended visit but for thee.
Col. Are you sure, Sir, that Mr. Belford is a man of honour?
Lovel. I can swear for him, Colonel. What makes you put this question?
Col. Only this: that an officious pragmatical novice has been sent upto inquire into my cousin's life and conversation: And, would you believeit? the frequent visits of this gentlemen have been interpreted basely toher disreputation.--Read that letter, Mr. Lovelace; and you will beshocked at ever part of it.
This cursed letter, no doubt, is from the young Levite, whom thou, Jack,describest as making inquiry of Mrs. Smith about Miss Harlowe's characterand visiters.*
* See Vol. VII. Letter LXXXI.
I believe I was a quarter of an hour in reading it: for I made it, thoughnot a short one, six times as long as it is, by the additions of oathsand curses to every pedantic line. Lord M. too helped to lengthen it, bythe like execrations. And thou, Jack, wilt have as much reason to curseit as we.
You cannot but see, said the Colonel, when I had done reading it, thatthis fellow has been officious in his malevolence; for what he says ismere hearsay, and that hearsay conjectural scandal without fact, or theappearance of fact, to support it; so that an unprejudiced eye, upon theface of the letter, would condemn the writer of it, as I did, and acquitmy cousin. But yet, such is the spirit by which the rest of my relationsare governed, that they run away with the belief of the worst itinsinuates, and the dear creature has had shocking letters upon it; thepedant's hints are taken; and a voyage to one of the colonies has beenproposed to her, as the only way to avoid Mr. Belford and you. I havenot seen these letters indeed; but they took a pride in repeating some oftheir contents, which must have cut the poor soul to the heart; andthese, joined to her former sufferings,--What have you not, Mr. Lovelace,to answer for?
Lovel. Who the devil could have expected such consequences as these?Who could have believe there could be parents so implacable? Brother andsister so immovably fixed against the only means that could be taken toput all right with every body?--And what now can be done?
Lord M. I have great hopes that Col. Morden may yet prevail upon hiscousin. And, by her last letter, it runs in my mind that she has somethoughts of forgiving all that's past. Do you think, Colonel, if thereshould not be such a thing as a reconciliation going forward at present,that her letter may not imply that, if we could bring such a thing tobear with her friends, she would be reconciled with Mr. Lovelace?
Col. Such an artifice would better become the Italian subtilty than theEnglish simplicity. Your Lordship has been in Italy, I presume?
Lovel. My Lord has read Boccaccio, perhaps; and that's as well, as tothe hint he gives, which may be borrowed from one of that author'sstories. But Miss Clarissa Harlowe is above all artifice. She must havesome meaning I cannot fathom.
Col. Well, my Lord, I can only say that I will make some use of theletters Mr. Lovelace has obliged me with: and after I have had some talkwith my cousin James, who is hourly expected; and when I have dispatchedtwo or three affairs that press upon me; I will pay my respects to mydear cousin; and shall then be able to form a better judgment of things.Mean time I will write to her; for I have sent to inquire about her, andfind she wants consolation.
Lovel. If you favour me, Colonel, with the d----d letter of that fellowBrand for a day or two, you will oblige me.
Col. I will. But remember, the man is a parson, Mr. Lovelace; aninnocent one too, they say. Else I had been at him before now. Andthese college novices, who think they know every thing in theircloisters, and that all learning lies in books, make dismal figures whenthey come into the world among men and women.
Lord M. Brand! Brand! It should have been Firebrand, I think in myconscience!
Thus ended this doughty conference.
I cannot say, Jack, but I am greatly taken with Col. Morden. He is braveand generous, and knows the world; and then his contempt of the parsonsis a certain sign that he is one of us.
We parted with great civility: Lord M. (not a little pleased that we did,and as greatly taken with Colonel) repeated his wish, after the Colonelwas gone, that he had arrived in time to save the lady, if that wouldhave done it.
I wish so too. For by my soul, Jack, I am every day more and more uneasyabout her. But I hope she is not so ill as I am told she is.
I have made Charlotte transcribe the letter of this Firebrand, as my Lordcalls him; and will enclose her copy of it. All thy phlegm I know willbe roused into vengeance when thou readest it.
I know not what to advise as to showing it to the lady. Yet, perhaps,she will be able to reap more satisfaction than concern from it, knowingher own innocence; in that it will give her to hope that her friends'treatment of her is owing as much to misrepresentation as to their ownnatural implacableness. Such a mind as her's, I know, would be glad tofind out the shadow of a reason for the shocking letters the Colonel saysthey have sent her, and for their proposal to her of going to some one ofthe colonies [confound them all--but, if I begin to curse, I shall neverhave done]--Then it may put her upon such a defence as she might be gladof an opportunity to make, and to shame them for their monstrouscredulity--but this I leave to thy own fat-headed prudence--Only it vexesme to the heart, that even scandal and calumny should dare to surmise thebare possibility of any man sharing the favours of a woman, whom nowmethinks I could worship with a veneration due only to a divinity.
Charlotte and her sister could not help weeping at the base aspersion:When, when, said Patty, lifting up her hands, will this sweet lady'ssufferings be at an end?--O cousin Lovelace!--
And thus am I blamed for every one's faults!--When her brutal fathercurses her, it is I. I upbraid her with her severe mother. Theimplacableness of her stupid uncles is all mine. The virulence of herbrother, and the spite of her sister, are entirely owing to me. Theletter of this rascal Brand is of my writing--O Jack, what a wretch isthy Lovelace!
***
Returned without a letter!--This d----d fellow Will. is returned withouta letter!--Yet the rascal tells me that he hears you have been writing tome these two days!
Plague confound thee, who must know my impatience, and the reason for it!
To send a man and horse on purpose; as I did! My imagination chained meto the belly of the beast, in order to keep pace with him!--Now he is gotto this place; now to that; now to London; now to thee!
Now [a letter given him] whip and spur upon the return. This town justentered, not staying to bait: that village passed by: leaves the windbehind him; in a foaming sweat man and horse.
And in this way did he actually enter Lord M.'s courtyard.
The reverberating pavement brought me down--The letter, Will.! Theletter, dog!--The letter, Sirrah!
No letter, Sir!--Then wildly staring round me, fists clenched, andgrinning like a maniac, Confound thee for a dog, and him that sent theewithout one!--This moment out of my sight, or I'll scatter thy stupidbrains through the air. I snatched from his holsters a pistol, while therascal threw himself from the foaming beast, and ran to avoid the fatewhich I wished with all my soul thou hadst been within the reach of m
e tohave met with.
But, to be as meek as a lamb to one who has me at his mercy, and canwring and torture my soul as he pleases, What canst thou mean to sendback my varlet without a letter?--I will send away by day-dawn anotherfellow upon another beast for what thou hast written; and I charge theeon thy allegiance, that thou dispatch him not back empty-handed.
POSTSCRIPT
Charlotte, in a whim of delicacy, is displeased that I send the enclosedletter to you--that her handwriting, forsooth! should go into the handsof a single man!
There's encouragement for thee, Belford! This is a certain sign thatthou may'st have her if thou wilt. And yet, till she has given me thisunerring demonstration of her glancing towards thee, I could not havethought it. Indeed I have often in pleasantry told her that I wouldbring such an affair to bear. But I never intended it; because shereally is a dainty girl; and thou art such a clumsy fellow in thy person,that I should as soon have wished her a rhinoceros for a husband as thee.But, poor little dears! they must stay till their time's come! Theywon't have this man, and they won't have that man, from seventeen totwenty-five: but then, afraid, as the saying is, that God has forgotthem, and finding their bloom departing, they are glad of whom they canget, and verify the fable of the parson and the pears.
Clarissa Harlowe; or the history of a young lady — Volume 8 Page 41