by Leann Harris
He loved April, plain and simple. And he loved her family, which meant he would be staying in the Panhandle. That wasn’t a problem. He’d saved up enough money to buy his own place, but he could put that money in the Circle L, updating some of the equipment.
It felt right. He could imagine the kids growing up and adding more children of their own. Her saying she wouldn’t have any more babies probably was her just saying she didn’t want to try again. Being married, she might want another one.
Not competing next year wasn’t a problem, since he hadn’t planned on it anyway. But if he didn’t finish this season, would he regret it?
He wrestled with the problem the rest of the night.
Chapter Fourteen
“Mom, Mom, get up.” A small hand shook her arm.
April opened one eye to be greeted by Todd’s smiling face. It took several moments for her brain to kick into gear, since she hadn’t fallen asleep until after three.
“It’s time to get up. We’re going to cowboy church, and we don’t want to be late.”
She glanced at the clock. Five-thirty. Todd never got up at this time. He raced off, leaving her to get her bearings. She tossed and turned, going over everything Joel had said last night. Their conversation had left her scratching her head. What had he been trying to say?
Two weeks ago, she’d felt alone, deserted and wondering how things would work out. The prayer she’d uttered the morning Joel showed up ran through her mind. God had sent help. Not in the way she expected it, but He’d sent help. Now she had her fields planted and the fences around the ranch secured so she wouldn’t lose any of her cattle, and those chores she’d hadn’t gotten to since her father-in-law died had been taken care of. Everything was right, but her heart wanted more.
She wanted Joel to stay. Be a husband and a father.
But as joy and confusion bubbled up, another stark reality appeared. Maybe, just maybe, she’d never really loved Ross at all. Maybe she’d loved the ranch, his family and having a home she didn’t have to leave every eighteen months instead of loving the man himself. Was that the reason he’d hired on as an oil-field worker—because she hadn’t loved him enough? Or maybe he’d regretted marrying her and just walked away.
Neither answer appealed to her.
Todd appeared again at her bedroom door, his superhero T-shirt wet with milk. “Uh, I kinda made a mess.”
April grabbed her robe, slipped it over her supermom sleep shirt and followed her son into the kitchen, ready to mop up milk.
* * *
Wes walked into the main bathroom, where April worked on putting Cora’s hair into pigtails. Cora sat on the vanity counter.
“You ready, son?”
“I am.”
Wes had his I’m-worried-about-something expression on.
April didn’t push.
“Mom, I want Joel to stay here with us.”
April dropped the ribbon she was tying in Cora’s hair. “Really?”
“I asked him to stay last night when he drove me home, but he said he couldn’t because we’d have to make sure it was okay with you.” His brows furrowed and he fixed her with his dark eyes.
She picked up the ribbon, scrambling for an answer. “Well, he was right.”
“So why aren’t you okay with marrying Mr. Joel?”
She was, but he’d have to propose first. “Have you decided to take up matchmaking as a career? The Cowboy Matchmaker?”
“Huh? A matchmaker? What’s that?”
“A long time ago, there were women you would go to who would match a man and woman so they could get married.”
“Like the commercials on TV?”
“What commercials?” Todd asked, coming into the bathroom, looking around.
“TV commercials about dating,” Wes explained.
“Ick.”
Ignoring her younger son’s comment, she answered, “Yes, that’s how it worked. So are you taking on that role?”
“No, I just want Mr. Joel to stay ’cause he makes us all laugh. And he makes you laugh and smile. It’s been a long time since you did that, Mom.”
“That’s true,” Todd added. “I forgot that you could laugh.”
The boys’ words, so simple and honest, stabbed her in the heart. Leaning over, she brushed a kiss across Wes’s cheek, then Todd’s. “Thank you, boys.”
“For what?”
“For telling me I should laugh.”
At their frowns, she laughed.
“So do you want Mr. Joel to stay?” Wes pressed.
“He’d have to ask.”
Wes nodded at her answer. “Okay.”
* * *
Joel helped set up the platform for Charlie to preach from. Section D in the auditorium was where the people for cowboy church would sit to see Charlie. Joel also found a stool for the guitarist to use as he led the crowd in worship.
Buck walked onto the dirt floor, holding his guitar.
“Is this good for you?” Joel asked.
“It is.” Buck moved to the stool, settled on it and played a few chords.
Joel checked that everything was in place, then walked off the auditorium floor and listened as Buck practiced a worship chorus. Leaning back against the wall of the entrance walkway, Joel listened to the song, trying to ignore the excitement and joy bouncing around inside him at seeing April and her crew.
When he woke this morning, he’d known what he would do. Before the end of the day, he’d propose, and he felt sure she’d say yes. Until he laid eyes on April again and confirmed her feelings for himself, his heart wouldn’t believe this dream could come true.
“O how he loves me.” The words drifted out of the auditorium.
Okay, Lord, I don’t know what to do here. Joel closed his eyes. Details needed to be worked out. And lots of issues had to be resolved between April and him, but—
“What are you doing out here?” Ty asked.
“Waiting for people to get here.”
Grinning, Ty said, “I can guess who.”
“Kinda obvious.”
“Only if you have eyes in your head.”
Joel frowned.
“Is there something more we should know about you and April?”
“What are you talking about?” Joel tried to keep his expression neutral.
“Mr. Joel,” Wes called out, waving as he ran toward Joel.
Ty slapped Joel on the shoulder. “You don’t need to answer.” He walked into the auditorium.
Joel turned and watched as the Landers family came toward him. His stomach jumped and a smile spread across his face. He felt tongue-tied and self-conscious. “Good morning, Wes, Todd and Cora.” Cora let go of her mother’s hand and ran toward him.
He scooped the girl up and realized how he treasured the greeting the children gave him, like a warm homecoming. Turning, he shared a secret smile with April. Her eyes twinkled, making him want to lean over and plant a kiss on her lips in front of the kids and the other cowboys and people walking around the halls. He had the confirmation he wanted. She shared his feelings. He hadn’t imagined it.
“The children were eager to come see you and participate in the cowboy church.”
“Just the kids?”
“No.” Her voice dropped low.
“I hear music,” Todd commented. “C’mon.”
They followed the youngsters into the seating area inside the auditorium. The boys greeted the other people as they wandered up and down the steps.
The family quickly settled into a section in front of the preaching platform.
Wes tugged on Joel’s sleeve. “I need to talk to you.”
“Okay.”
Wes shook his head. “Now and in private.”
“We’ll be back in a moment.”
The instant they were outside the auditorium, Wes stopped and motioned Joel to lean down.
“Mom would say yes if you asked her to marry you.”
Joel jerked upright.
“I told Mo
m about our conversation and what you said.”
“And what did she say?”
“She smiled and laughed. I think she’d say yes, but you’d have to ask.”
Joel wanted to laugh himself. “Thanks for telling me.”
“So are you going to ask?”
“I think I will, but you have to keep the secret until I can talk to your mom.”
Wes beamed. “I can do that.”
They walked back into the auditorium, and Wes scampered to his seat. Joel sat by April.
Leaning close, April whispered, “What was that about?”
“Just man-to-man talk.”
She looked straight into his eyes. The urge to escape with her and find a private spot and propose nearly overwhelmed him.
Millie and her husband walking up the stairs and sitting beside him in the row ended that plan.
“Stop that,” Millie whispered.
“What?” Joel tried to look innocent.
“We’re going to have a service and you’re ogling a girl, then fibbing about it.”
He’d been caught.
Cora smiled at Millie and showed her the horsey.
“So you still like your horse?”
Nodding, Cora hugged the stuffed animal.
The beginning chords of the worship chorus came over the speaker, and the audience stood and joined in with the song.
Leaning close, Millie added, “While Charlie is here, you should just book him for the wedding.”
Joel jerked away. “What?”
“You two are lit up like neon lights.”
“Things aren’t official.”
“So, you can take care of that. If you don’t want to give anything away, I suggest that you shouldn’t look at April all moon-eyed.” She grinned, turned and joined in with the chorus.
Joel focused on the podium, trying to be cool.
It wasn’t working. He could feel Millie grinning beside him as they finished the worship service.
Suddenly the sermon ended and everyone stood and sang the final song. Joel remembered nothing of the sermon. Had Charlie preached?
Filing out of the auditorium, Joel grabbed Millie. “Could you watch the kids for a moment?”
Millie gave him a knowing look.
“I’m going to take your advice.”
“About time.”
Joel grabbed April’s hand. “Millie’s going to take the kids to the snack area.”
“Why?”
Joel glanced at Wes and winked. “Mom, I’ll hold Cora’s hand.”
Without further discussion, Joel pulled April to the front door of the building, where it was quiet.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“Trying to find us a quiet spot.”
April blushed.
He found a bench just inside the front doors and they sat. Joel swallowed. “Little did I know when I drove up your drive nearly two weeks ago, I would find a wonderful family and a beautiful woman who knocked me flatter than any bull I’ve tried to ride, but I did.
“One look in your eyes and I knew. Deep in my heart I knew here was the one. I couldn’t shake it off.
“And your children just took me by storm. I didn’t have a chance.” He shook his head. “I’m going to be such an easy mark for Cora.”
“She knows how to work her wiles already. I’m sure she’s going to be a handful when she’s grown.” April smiled.
“And Wes and Todd are sharp boys. I nearly fell off the loading dock when they wanted to hire me to help you with the planting.”
“I didn’t believe you until the boys confirmed your story. I would’ve loved to have seen that scene play out.”
They exchanged chuckles.
He grabbed her hand. “I love you, April. Love you and your children. Will you marry me?”
Her gaze searched his face, looking for the truth of his words.
His lips brushed over hers, reassuring her.
“Yes.”
He leaned his forehead against hers. “I am blessed.”
Tears filled her eyes. “I had my back up against the wall and didn’t know how I’d make it. I’d just said amen when you drove up. You weren’t what I was expecting.” Her fingers danced over his face, as if she was blind. “But God certainly knows what He’s doing.”
“Mom,” Todd called out. He ran up to them and noted the tears in his mother’s eyes. “Are you okay?” His gaze narrowed as he turned to Joel.
“She’s okay,” Joel reassured the boy.
“Why’s she crying?”
“Because I’m happy,” April answered.
“Huh?”
Joel laughed. “It’s a girl thing.”
Todd’s brow remained crinkled.
Joel leaned forward and whispered, “Your mom and I are getting married.”
Todd let loose with a whoop that rang through the hall, and he raced back to the concession area yelling, “They’re getting married!”
When they arrived back at the picnic tables, everyone broke into applause. Wes gave Joel a thumbs-up. Cora ran to Joel. He scooped her up and she wrapped her arms around his neck.
Congratulations were called out. Chaos erupted with the cowboys slapping Joel on the back and shaking April’s hand. The boys bounced around.
“So when’s this going to happen?” Millie asked.
“Joel and I haven’t discussed particulars yet.”
April’s answer brought a smile to Millie’s face.
“I never would’ve guessed,” Mike said, shaking his head.
“Men are so obtuse,” Millie mumbled.
“What’s obtuse?” Todd asked, looking at Millie.
“It means a man can instantly tell if you scratched his truck, but he can’t see two people in love right in front of his face,” Millie answered.
“We need to celebrate,” Hank announced. “I’d planned to feed everyone to use up what I had left before we move to our next stop in Amarillo, but now we have extra reason to celebrate.”
“I have a sop cake I made for Mike yesterday,” Millie added. “We can use that for an engagement cake if you don’t mind a couple of pieces missing.” Millie looked at her husband. Mike shrugged, bringing a round of laughter to the crowd.
Joel kept glancing at April, wondering at her reaction. After Millie went to retrieve the cake, Joel fought his way to April’s side.
“Are you okay announcing it now?”
“I guess the goofy expressions on our faces would’ve tipped everyone off.”
“Could be, but I just couldn’t keep it a secret. Apparently neither could Todd.”
The soft, sweet smile she gave him nearly brought him to his knees.
“Did you know that Wes made a pitch for you this morning while I was putting Cora’s hair in pigtails?”
“Oh?”
“Wes liked how you made me smile. And laugh.”
The words wrapped around his heart. “I’m glad to know Wes is in my corner.”
Joel slipped his arm around her waist and whispered, “I think your boys are okay with us marrying if their happy dance is any indication. And we don’t have to worry about Cora, either.”
That was the last time he talked to April for the next hour. Hank, Ty, Buck and Millie peppered him with questions.
“Are you going to quit right away, Joel, and give away your chance for a belt buckle?” Ty asked.
His question reverberated through the snack area, silencing all conversation.
“April and I haven’t discussed it yet,” Joel explained. “But—”
Hank turned to April. “He’s close, April. You might want to wait. The prize money is very nice and goes a long way in helping a rancher.”
April’s mouth tightened.
“I think April and I need to work this out privately and not in front of an audience. And you don’t have voting power.”
Laughter rippled in response.
“So you two planning on adding more children to the kids you have alre
ady?” Millie asked, bringing all conversation to a halt once more.
“Of course,” Joel answered quickly. “I can’t think of anything I’d like more.”
When he glanced at April, she was as white as a sheet.
Something was wrong. Deadly wrong.
But what?
* * *
April tried to respond to the questions folks asked her, but her world suddenly went up in flames.
Joel wanted children. His own.
She’d told him she wouldn’t have any more children, so why would he say he wanted kids? Had he forgotten? Or did he think she just didn’t want more kids because she felt she’d had enough already? Did he think she had an option?
Joel caught her eye. He shrugged as if to say he was sorry his friends asked such personal questions.
And there were her kids’ reactions. They wanted Joel and her to marry and expected him to stay.
She couldn’t stay here and pretend everything was fine. Too much had gone wrong that she needed to sort out, and she needed to get away before she made a scene.
Cora began to droop, giving her the perfect excuse. “I think we need to leave.” April pointed to Cora.
Joel pushed the hair off of Cora’s face. “She could sleep in the trailer again.”
“No, she needs to go home.” Her sharp tone made him pause.
“The boys could stay here—”
“They need to come home with me, too.”
Joel stared at her, but she needed time and space.
Wes and Todd looked from their mom to Joel, but they didn’t object.
“Okay.”
Before she could grab Cora from the picnic bench, Joel scooped her up. He didn’t look back at her but slowly walked toward the parking lot. Wes and Todd trailed after him.
April found her purse and snatched it from the floor.
Millie laid a hand on April’s arm. “The guys meant no harm. Don’t let them bother you.”
Her throat tightened. “It wasn’t the guys.”
“Then what?”
“There are some issues that Joel and I need to talk about that we didn’t discuss before.” April closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I need to go home and think about them.”
“I understand, but know Joel is a find that lots of women would like to catch. I wouldn’t turn my back on him.”