The more I watched her, the more apparent it became that Wren was, in fact, a dominant as hell she-wolf. She didn’t exploit the humans around her, not because she couldn’t, but because she wouldn’t.
And didn’t that just make me feel like a piece of shit? My first reaction had been to assume the worst about her. What did that say about me?
Guilt knifed uncomfortably through my chest. I knew my whole ‘playing the field’ excuse was weak. It had probably been weak from the beginning. The first step is admitting you have a problem, and my problem was I was a fucking coward.
Wren stood at the counter, talking to the two women she lived and worked with. The taller one pressed tight against Wren’s side, monopolizing her attention, clamoring for the Beta role. Maybe even the Alpha role. I watched as Wren deftly switched her focus to the shorter, quieter woman. She gave the woman her full attention as she spoke, resting her hand on the taller woman’s arm to quiet her.
My gut clenched uncomfortably. The Luna was the heart of the pack. The Alpha’s job was to protect and lead. The Luna’s to nurture and bring together. A good Luna inspired trust in the Alpha pair among the pack, took time to know and listen to every member, and made sure everyone had a voice.
Wren would be a good Luna.
She waved them farewell, giving them each a slight smile that had them staring adoringly at her turned back.
For a moment, I was almost happy as I saw her emerge from the coffee shop. She shrugged on the jacket I’d bought for her and looked far more comfortable than I’d ever seen her, her lips a beautiful pouty blush instead of blue, and no chattering teeth in sight.
Then I noticed the enormous guy waiting for her who she seemed to greet with familiarity, and my blood boiled under my skin while my wolf snarled in warning. He was fucking huge, and there’s no way he was human. In fact, I was pretty sure I’d seen him before.
Was he the reason she never tried to find me?
They walked into the carpark, approaching his truck, and I stealthily rested the phone on the steering wheel like I was reading a message before snapping a picture of the two of them and sending it to Miles.
Archer:
Do we know this guy?
My phone dinged instantly as Miles slid into Detective Beta mode.
Miles:
Tobias Perry, a centurion from the Fortis Pack. He was at the last council meeting.
Miles:
Should I comment on the stalking…?
Archer:
Fuck off. Any reason he’d be in town?
Miles:
Aside from a date with your girl?
Asshole, that was uncalled for.
I started up the truck as the two of them pulled out of the parking lot and followed from a distance until they pulled up at a diner nearby. I parked as close as I could to the front window, silently thanking the Fates as they picked a table near the front where I had a decent view of them.
I couldn’t see what they were saying, but I could at least make out their body language. If Tobias kissed her, I’d gut him like a fish.
My phone lit up on the passenger seat next to me, and I reluctantly diverted my attention.
Miles:
My dad just called.
Archer:
And?
Miles:
Tobias called my dad a couple of hours ago asking why we hadn’t alerted the council to the fact that a shifter had moved onto neutral territory. Apparently she’s their Alpha’s niece, but they only found that out today.
How was that even possible? The Fortis Pack was legit. They were respectable wolves and far richer than our pack. Why wouldn’t they know about her? My little mate was a mystery wrapped in several more layers of mystery.
Miles:
I didn’t mention her connection to you.
Archer:
Anything else?
Miles:
Your dad will probably ream us both out for not mentioning her. Mine already ripped into me. You going to talk to her now?
I tossed my phone back on the passenger seat, refusing to dignify that with a response because I didn’t have a good answer. Or a bad answer. Or any answer. My head was beyond fucked up over the girl, and I hadn’t even met her yet.
Telling the Council — or my dad — about her presence here hadn’t even occurred to me. I hadn’t even spoken to her, but I sure as fuck didn’t want to share her attention with anyone else.
Knowing they’d just discovered a familial link between Wren and the Fortis Pack, this cozy little dinner date didn’t look quite so romantic. Both of them were sitting up straight in their chairs, not leaning towards each other, and seemed to be having a reasonably serious conversation judging by the focused expressions on their faces.
My wolf still felt threatened but had stopped howling enough that I could at least hear the surrounding noise outside the truck again. If I thought I was fucked up over this girl, my wolf was beyond repair.
They both ate a burger and fries for dinner, their conversation switching to lighter subjects as Wren laughed more often, setting my jealous wolf back off again. Fuck it. It wasn’t all my wolf’s jealousy; I wanted to claim every one of her laughs for my own.
Fortunately, they didn’t linger after dinner. I followed them back towards campus where Wren jumped out of his truck at the grocery store, rather than getting him to drive to her house, which I was relieved about. Until she disappeared into the darkness like a ghost, making me panic all over again. By the time I pulled up at her house, she had reached her doorstep and was letting herself inside, balancing a bulging back of groceries on her hip.
I didn’t know if I was furious or grateful that she’d inadvertently given me the slip. If I’d spotted her before she’d left, I would have insisted on giving her a ride home. Then she’d know who I was and it would all be over. Or beginning. Depending on how you looked at it, I guess.
Annoyed at myself, I drove back home in a daze, letting myself into the house without remembering how I got there. Shit. Exams were over. The semester was done. Usually, I’d be halfway back to Audax Pack territory by now. My wolf howled mournfully at the prospect of spending time away from Wren and I banged my head a couple of times on the steering wheel.
What a fucking mess.
✽✽✽
I needed a fix. A hit. I was an addict for this girl I’d never talked to. It felt like the coffee shop was barely open now the semester had ended, which put a serious dent in the hours I had available to stare at Wren — she barely left the house when she wasn’t working. It made me angsty not having eyes on her at all times. Especially without schoolwork to distract me.
“Couldn’t you just, oh I don’t know, talk to her?” Miles sighed. We were sitting in the cab of the truck in the driveway. I’d already cut the engine. This was our third failed attempt to drive back to pack territory this week.
My wolf wasn’t having it. He didn’t want to leave Wren. I’d tried to convince Miles to go without me — he deserved to spend some time with his family — but he steadfastly refused. Loyal to a fault.
“You don’t have to stay,” I reminded him again, blowing out a long breath as my wolf receded, satisfied we weren’t leaving.
“Because it wouldn’t raise any questions if I went home without you,” he said wryly, opening his door. He knew the drill. He’d go inside and kill time while I stalked Wren like a serial killer.
I couldn’t approach her now. Winter was a crazy time in the pack — the Tiberius feast, the mated couples all entering their heat cycles, then the Lupercalia in February… It’d be weird doing all that stuff coupled up. Too serious. Like going from 0 to 100 on the commitment scale in the space of a week.
No, it was better I didn’t approach her yet.
Wren was already leaving work by the time I got there. I watched to make sure she got home okay before returning to the house, jaw twitching that I’d only gotten a short glimpse of her today.
“So?” Miles asked, standing in
the living room, waiting for me. “Did you talk to her?”
“Not yet.”
I dropped my keys on the table and turned to face Miles, taking him in properly. His arms were crossed, but his posture was tense, muscles coiled, feet hip-width apart. My eyes narrowed on his and he met my gaze defiantly, gritting his teeth against the discomfort.
“What are you doing, Miles?” I drawled, matching his stance.
“Dad told me about your mother.”
My stomach dropped, but I kept my face a mask of indifference. “So you thought you’d challenge me for my place? Worried about my faulty genetics?”
“No, dumbass,” Miles snapped, voice rising as he struggled to rein in his anger. “I don’t give a flying fuck about your genetics. What’s going on with your mom is a tragedy and while I understand why you didn’t tell me about it, I’m your best friend, and it goddamn hurts.”
Guilt pricked at my conscience. My wolf’s need for superiority had won out over my human need to confide in my best friend. I couldn’t pin it all on my wolf though. It had been my call.
“So, what’s your deal then? I can feel your wolf raging,” I sighed, emotionally spent, as I moved towards the fridge to get a beer.
“He’s worried about his current Luna and worried about his future Luna!” Miles snapped, running both hands through his hair.
“What?” I asked in surprise, turning back to him.
“Fates, Arch, can’t you see it? My wolf recognizes you — has always recognized you — as our future Alpha. Therefore, to him, your fated mate is his future Luna. He’s honor-bound to protect both of you. You’re splitting his loyalties with your bullshit.”
Fuck.
“I’d never challenge you over the shit your mom is going through, man, but if you keep this up with Wren, I might have to challenge you for the good of the pack. It’s goddamn agony having my wolf struggle like this, and I won’t stand by while the rest of them go through it too just because you are too fucking immature to commit.”
Without waiting for a response, he stormed out the front door, slamming it shut behind him. I let him go. He’d let his wolf out and probably run the perimeter as close as he could get to Wren’s house without scenting it, protecting her while she slept. He’d been doing it more often recently and, judging by the black smudges under his eyes, it was taking its toll.
The beer in my hand no longer had any appeal. I shoved it back in the fridge, dropping to the couch and resting my head in my hands.
If I approached Wren now, she’d think I only did it because I was jealous of Tobias. Which I absolutely was, but it’s not like that would be the only motivator for me staking my claim.
As if my night couldn’t get any worse, my phone started buzzing in my pocket and I knew without a doubt who it was. Again.
“Son.” Dad’s voice clipped as soon as I picked up the phone.
“Dad.”
“I thought you may have forgotten how to answer your phone.” Dad’s voice was cold, full of barely restrained anger.
“I’ve been busy.” I scrubbed my hand down my face. Probably should have come up with a better excuse than that.
“During winter break, when all of your exams are over. This doesn’t have anything to do with the conversation Joe had with Tobias Perry of the Fortis Pack, does it? I’m sure you heard about it.”
“I heard,” I sighed.
“I don’t know why the girl was covering her scent, but she must have done an expert job if you didn’t realize she was living so close to you. Have you been trying to find her? Is that what has been keeping you so busy?”
I swear my heart stopped beating for a full second. He thought I didn’t know about her. I was not about to look a Get Out of Jail Free card in the mouth.
“She is good at covering her scent,” I said slowly, being selective about what questions I answered. I was still a little too afraid of my dad to lie. If anyone could smell a lie through the phone, it was Alpha Ellery. “I don’t know why she’s hiding.”
“It’s not something you need to concern yourself with, apparently she’s Alpha Calvin’s niece. She’s under their protection now.”
I bit back the urge to growl, my chest aching from the effort. Fuck. That. She was under my protection. She was mine to protect.
“You’ve stayed away long enough, son, The feast is tomorrow, be back on pack territory early.” Dad continued, oblivious to my struggle, voice full of Alpha command that I wasn’t quite strong enough to fight off. “Flynn is looking forward to seeing you. The entire pack is. We’ve missed you and Miles.”
“Sure,” I choked out, my wolf howling in misery, knowing we’d be leaving Wren behind, but unable to disobey a direct command.
“Get some sleep,” Dad instructed. “I don’t want you driving tired. See you both tomorrow.”
✽✽✽
I didn’t drive. Miles drove while I sat, bent over double in the passenger seat, my wolf clawing viciously at my insides. The skin on my hands rippled, fur brushing uncomfortably at my flesh and claws pricking just under the surface.
“Please don’t shift in the truck,” Miles muttered. “Your wolf will shred me for taking you away from her.”
He was right. I rolled my neck and flexed my fingers, pushing him back, willing myself to stay in control. This was the right thing to do. Dad had ordered me home. I had a responsibility to my pack to spend time with them. I needed to see how my mom was doing. Flynn needed me.
The fated mate stuff could wait. It wasn’t a good time, anyway. She had a lot on her plate already with finding out about her extended family.
She’d still be there after winter break, I promised my wolf. I’d sort it out then.
Miles gave me a judgy look out of the corner of his eye, like he knew exactly what I was thinking.
“You won’t be able to hide this from your dad,” he pointed out, like a masochist. My wolf was ready to lunge at him already. “Your wolf is so close to the surface, the entire pack will feel him. And you’re a fucking wreck,” he added as an afterthought.
“My wolf won’t be as angry when we get to Audax territory,” I replied through gritted teeth. Miles looked doubtful, but I was confident. He wouldn’t be angry. He’d be mournful. It was just a few days, though. No big deal.
“I’m going to generously bet it takes ten minutes for your dad to figure out there’s something wrong. And about twenty seconds after that to figure out what it is,” Miles announced. I sat back up, tipping my head back against the headrest and breathing heavily.
“Shut up.”
Blessedly, he did. We made the 90-minute trip in almost silence. Me, wrestling with my wolf. Miles, judging the hell out of me, based on the looks I was getting.
He parked the truck outside my cabin, which was at the very edge of our border and accessible by car, unlike the rest of the territory. As predicted, my wolf had gone from raging to howling mournfully the moment we passed into Audax territory.
“Go ahead,” I said to Miles, nodding at the steep expanse of forest that lay between my cabin and the central buildings. He’d cover the ground easily on four legs, but I wasn’t willing to shift. Wren was all my wolf could think about, we’d be back on campus by the time I grabbed the reins.
Miles gave me a searching look before moving towards the edge of the clearing. He stripped and shifted, and I moved towards his wolf who was hesitating next to the trees.
“I’ll be fine, buddy. Go see your family,” I reassured the white and gray wolf in a soothing tone, rubbing his head as he butted against my hand. He chuffed once before heading up the mountain, leaving me on my own.
✽✽✽
“It’s good to have you home, son,” my father said softly, rubbing the spot in his chest where the connection to Mom’s wolf sat. He’d been rubbing at it like he was easing an ache ever since she got sick. We’d been sitting together in his office for five minutes, and he hadn’t stopped once.
“It’s hard on Flynn not havin
g you around. With your mother, you know…” he trailed off. “Not that I want you to come home. It’s important for you and Miles to have this experience and bring the knowledge you gain back to the pack. I’ll be ensuring your brother does the same, next year.”
Guilt gnawed at my insides. Miles and I had dreamed of going to college since we were pups. We’d worked on convincing the Alpha, Beta and Pack Elders for years to work with the Council to make this happen. But it was all before Mom got sick last year. Spending time away at college didn’t fill me with the same satisfaction as it did before. It just made me feel sad, selfish, and guilty.
That seemed to be my permanent state of being now.
“I could defer,” I said hesitantly. “Maybe I’m better off being home right now.” I closed my eyes for a moment, holding back a shudder as my wolf’s rage ripped through me.
“No,” Dad’s voice brooked no room for argument and he gave me a sharp shake of his head. “This is an important opportunity for you and the pack. Besides, I keep hoping you’ll come across your fated mate out there in the big wide world.”
His tone was teasing, but the blood drained from my face nonetheless. I had really hoped this topic of conversation wouldn’t come up.
“Son? I can smell your nerves.” Dad’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. There’s a reason he was the Alpha. This was not a man to be trifled with.
Fucking Miles. I didn’t even make it ten minutes.
“You’ve already found her,” he surmised, filling in my silence. “Yet, she isn’t here, you never mentioned her, you don’t have a claiming mark...”
Where had all the oxygen gone? Why was it so hot in here?
Dad barked a harsh laugh that had no humor in it. “Fates. It’s the mysterious she-wolf living in Carson, isn’t it? Alpha Calvin’s niece. A lie of omission is still a lie, Archer.”
My wolf whined as my Dad turned the full force of his Alpha disapproval on me. My eyes dropped to the ground, and I subconsciously tilted my head to the side, offering him my throat.
Fire & Gasoline: A Shifter Romance (Audax Pack Book 1) Page 8