by Ivy Jordan
I told him about the song, and the music box, and then the cooking show that led to a disaster. “Maybe cooking is something you’ve always wanted to do, but didn’t,” the doctor suggested. “That would be a great hobby for you, but I suggest starting out small and working your way into the tougher recipes,” he chuckled.
His smile was warm and inviting, and his eyes honest and pure. I trusted him when he told me things would get better, and I had to just believe him.
“As for the memory triggers, you said Maddie didn’t live here, and that you would make a trip to Portland; has that happened yet?” he asked Isaac.
“I’ve been trying to get caught up on work,” he said quickly.
“Okay, well, we need to make that happen as soon as possible,” the doctor instructed.
“I offered to go alone,” I chimed in, hoping he’d give me the pass to go if Isaac never made the plans.
“I don’t think that is such a good idea. Unless you have someone that you know and trust to meet you at the airport,” the doctor said.
Ugh! I didn’t know anyone, so how would I know if they were to be trusted?
“Is there a chance that I’ll never remember?” I asked, my voice squeaking as I spoke.
I was scared to death to hear the answer. I couldn’t imagine leaving twenty-five years behind and starting fresh, no memories, nothing.
“There is always a chance, but I would say that is less than two percent,” the doctor replied.
Relief fell over me like a warm blanket. That was a very low chance, but I shuddered at the thought of there still being that chance.
“So, for now, I want you to use cooking as a hobby, stay at the gym where you said you felt the most comfortable, and plan that trip to Portland,” he smiled directly at me. His teeth were so white they nearly glowed, and his dark hair wavy and long, falling onto his shoulders in a loose curl. He was a handsome man. I wondered if that was my type before. I looked at Isaac, blond, cropped hair, beautiful green eyes, muscular and serious. Was he my type?
“Well, that was all good news,” Isaac boasted as we left the office.
“I guess,” I sighed.
“Let’s get some food,” Isaac suggested.
I was hungry, but I wasn’t sure what I wanted. I hated not remembering what I liked until I saw it or tasted it. “I have no idea what I want,” I whined.
“I have an idea,” Isaac boasted with a wide smile smeared across his face. He gripped my hand and pulled me towards the Escalade where he helped me inside. He wouldn’t tell me where we were going, and no matter how many times I begged for a hint, he just smirked.
Finally, we pulled into a restaurant parking lot with a large sign that read “World’s Largest Buffet,” I smiled, realizing he was going to let me try everything I wanted in one sitting.
“Seriously?” I laughed.
“Yes. You can at least see everything, smell it, and just put what you think you like on your plate,” he instructed as he slid out of the truck.
He came to my side, helped me out of the truck, and then slid his hand in mine as we walked towards the front door.
The aroma of all the foods cooked inside made my mouth water. I was ready to try it all. “They have ethnic foods in each of the four corners,” he pointed out as he showed me where everything was organized.
We took a seat in a booth that was nearest to the buffet and ordered water from the waitress. Isaac smiled as he handed me a plate. “Ready to try?”
I was so ready. This would be a great chance for me to learn something about myself, even if it was something as simple as knowing my tastes.
I held my plate and walked with Isaac through the buffet tables. He reached for all the fried foods, spicy Asian dishes, and decadent desserts while I was a little choosier. By the time we made it back to the table, I’d chosen brown rice, salmon, asparagus, fresh fruit, and a fresh spinach salad. “Wow, you went right back to your roots,” Isaac teased.
“I did?” I asked excitedly.
He nodded with a smile. “You were a yoga instructor, and look at your body. Of course you ate healthily,” he teased.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I questioned, feeling a little uneasy about whether he truly knew me or not.
“The doctor said not to push anything on you, to let you make the choices,” he explained.
I knew he had, but I also knew that Isaac hadn’t brought very many options for healthy foods into the house while I’d been there. Cookies, chocolate milk, and large jars of peanut butter were in abundance, but as far as healthy choices, a few fruit options, iced tea, and salad mixes were about it.
“See, your brain knows what it wants,” Isaac smiled.
“I guess it does,” I replied, feeling a sense of connection to myself for once.
“So, you want to buy a TV for the kitchen so you can follow the cooking shows like the doctor suggested?” he asked.
I wasn’t completely sold on the idea of cooking as a hobby, especially after my last incident of nearly burning down the house. “You may have had it as a secret desire somewhere deep in your mind,” he convinced me.
“Okay,” I agreed.
If my brain knew what it wanted, then sleeping with Isaac that night must’ve been a sign. I tried eating a few different things, and my brain told me instantly I didn’t like it, like mustard, dill pickles, and chunky peanut butter. I loved the sex with Isaac, his touch, his scent, his flavor. If that wasn’t something I wanted, my brain would’ve shut it down like it had the pickle that I tried to swallow, right?
We left the restaurant, but not before Isaac had gone back for seconds, mostly desserts. How in the hell does he stay so fit eating like that?
We stopped at the electronics store and bought a thirty-two inch TV for the kitchen, and Isaac was eager to get it hooked up and some healthy cooking shows set up in the DVR for me to follow. “Anything you need, like ingredients, just tell me,” he insisted.
“Are you going to eat it?” I asked, wondering if he even cared about eating well. I’d never seen him work out, there were no weights in the house, and he never offered to go to the gym with me. If the gym, eating healthy, and saving the planet were things that were important to me, what did we even have in common?
“I’ll try,” he grinned.
His green eyes widened, and he stared at me with a hunger. My body was reacting to the time we’d spent together, and the way he looked right then in front of me. I wanted him, but I wasn’t sure I was ready. It had been a long day, and I had a lot on my mind.
“I’ve got some work to do,” Isaac sighed, obviously disappointed by my lack of interest in his seductive eyes.
“Okay. I’m going to take a shower and head to bed,” I replied, trying to act as casual as possible.
“I’ll meet you in bed soon. Keep my side of the bed warm,” he winked.
I smiled forcibly, trying to hide my reservations. I’d been sleeping in his bed for the last few nights, but a part of me wanted my own space for the evening. “Would you mind if I slept in the guest room tonight? I’m just really exhausted,” I asked shyly.
His squared chin shifted, and his eyes narrowed as he worked a smile onto his face. I watched his long fingers, the ones that had teased my pussy so skillfully, slide through his short blond crew cut. Tingles of excitement rolled through my body, making me question my decision. “I understand,” Isaac said sweetly.
He leaned in, lowering his tall frame to snatch a quick kiss from my lips. Electricity shot through my body from our touch. His lips were so soft, so smooth, that I wanted to suck them into my mouth and get every last ounce of flavor from them.
Isaac pulled back, his eyes glowing with mischief, and his lips curled into a wickedly sexy smile. Fuck, he knows I want him.
“Goodnight,” I blurted and rushed past him and up the stairs to my room.
I wish I could shake the feeling of doubts I had about Isaac. He is an amazing man, sexy, smart, and sensitive. He’s been nothin
g but sweet to me this entire time, and I am starting to fall for him. I just can’t let go of the feeling that something isn’t quite right.
Chapter Thirteen
Isaac
I walked into the house to a smell of something not burnt coming from the kitchen. As I entered the room, Maddie was stirring something on one of the frying pans she hadn’t ruined on her first attempt. The TV displayed a woman wearing yoga pants with a blonde ponytail. Her voice was perky as she went on and on about how important it is to eat well and stay in shape.
Maddie seemed happy as she wiggled her hips in the same motion as her wooden spatula. My cock twitched against my jeans, anxious to feel the warmth of her tight pussy contracting around me. A soft growl escaped my throat, causing her to turn in my direction. “Hey, when did you get home?” she asked cheerfully.
“Just now,” I smiled, certain my cheeks were red as fire as I tried to calm the erection growing in my pants. “I see you’re enjoying your new hobby,” I said sweetly as I moved towards her.
“I didn’t burn anything,” she laughed, the dimples in her cheeks sinking in as deep as they had when she was just a girl. “I didn’t have all the ingredients, but I think it turned out okay,” she smiled.
“It smells amazing,” I boasted, actually being truthful. It did smell good, but then again, anything would’ve smelled better than her last attempt of a meal.
“So, you’ll try it?” she asked excitedly.
I couldn’t help but smirk as she bounced in front of me, her excitement overwhelmingly thrilling. “What is it?” I asked, still concerned about what she may ask me to eat.
She pulled out a chair at the table and motioned for me to sit. I slid in and watched as she prepared two plates. A pile of whole grain rice with slices of asparagus and what appeared to be almond slivers was piled on the plate, and then a small chicken breast with something green oozing from its center was placed on top. She drizzled some type white sauce over the top and then garnished the plate with a sprig of thyme. “Wow,” I exclaimed as she placed a plate in front of me. It was a work of art. “It’s beautiful,” I smiled, watching her eyes twinkle and her cheeks brighten to a beautiful shade of pink.
She sat down beside me and watched me as I picked up my fork. The pressure of her anticipation was freaking me out. What if I don’t like it?
“Here goes,” I grinned, scooping up a large bite onto my fork. My hand shook a little as it reached to my mouth. Her eyes were drilling into me as the food passed my lips. An array of unfamiliar flavors hit my tongue, some amazing, some not so amazing, but it wasn’t bad. It wasn’t bad at all. “Do you like it?” she asked eagerly.
I smiled and nodded, still chewing the chicken that was a little overcooked.
She sighed with relief and then started to eat from her own plate. I watched her chew the food, her smile widening with each bite. The knowledge that she never cooked, and actually hated to cook, made me feel warm inside. If she could learn to love this, then why couldn’t she learn to love me too?
“I used your laptop today,” Maddie announced.
My eyes widened on her, following her hand as it scraped at the rice on her plate. What the fuck did she do on there? My heart raced as I waited patiently for her to explain.
“I hope you don’t mind,” she added with a faint smile.
I braced for anything she would say next, certain that it would spell my doom.
“I wanted to check social media pages, like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram,” she said casually.
“Oh,” is all I could manage to say.
“I didn’t mean to invade your privacy, it’s ju-just so frustrating not knowing anything, and I thought…” Maddie trailed off on her thoughts to stare down at her plate. “I thought I could find out who Rob was, who I was, and maybe see some things about us that would help me,” she added.
“Did you find what you were looking for?” I asked, trying hard not to choke on my words.
“No,” she sighed. I couldn’t have been more relieved, but it still hurt to watch her so frustrated. “There were three Maddie Grubbs on there, but none of them were my profile,” she complained.
Fuck, that’s right; she doesn’t know she’s Maddie Stewart.
“You didn’t really get into all that social media stuff,” I told her.
“You have a Facebook and Twitter, but not much on there,” she sighed.
“No. I don’t really use it for myself. It’s good to have to check on clients,” I explained.
She looked so disappointed. I hated to see her so upset, but I knew it wasn’t a good time to spill the beans on what her last name actually was, or why I’d changed it.
I’d checked out her social media pages, and they were filled with pictures of her and Rob. All the posts and updates were filled with where they were going, what they were doing next, and how much they were in love. Fuck! If she saw that, there would be no way she’d believe me about him, no way in hell. I’d have to find a way to get her to remember without any risk of her seeing all the good stuff first.
“Wouldn’t I have had something for my yoga classes?” she asked.
I could feel my face turning pale as I tried to come up with an answer. She wasn’t a yoga instructor, but a personal trainer, and yes, she had plenty of accounts dedicated to her career, but they all linked to the gym that Rob Fallon owned.
“I thought you said something about closing them down until you got settled here,” I lied. Fuck, all I do is lie anymore.
She seemed satisfied enough with my response, but I could see a glimmer of confusion and doubt in her beautiful blue eyes. “Why don’t we watch a movie tonight, and just relax?” I suggested, hoping to change the subject.
She nodded and offered a faint smile in my direction. Yeah, she isn’t buying this shit no more.
I sent her upstairs to take a shower, and I stayed in the kitchen to clean up after dinner. She really wasn’t used to cooking; the mess made that obvious.
As I washed the pots and pans, my mind wandered to what Beth had warned: that I’d lose Maddie forever if I didn’t come clean soon. My fear was that even if I did come clean now, I’d still lose her. I couldn’t bear the thought of her hating me.
Upstairs, the bedroom door was closed to the guest room, but no sounds of the shower came through. I thought about knocking, just to check on her, but decided to give her some space. It was a rough day for her; I knew that.
I stripped out of my clothes and grabbed a pair of sleep pants and a towel from the closet before heading into my private bathroom.
Staring in the mirror at myself made me cringe. What was I doing? I was so selfish. I knew I’d started this to protect Maddie, but now I feared I was continuing to protect myself. I was better than this. Maddie deserved better than this.
My fists clenched so hard that veins bulged from the tops of my hands and my shoulders felt tight. I wanted to punch the image in the mirror, just knock him the fuck out.
I stepped into the shower, turning the water on as hot as I could make it, and let it roll over my sore muscles. Maddie’s blue eyes were all I could see when my eyelids rolled shut. I pushed my face into the water, letting the heat steam away the image that was haunting me. Fuck, I have to fix this. I have to tell her the truth.
I shut the water off, patted myself dry with the large plush towel, and slid on my sleep pants. As I walked out of my room, shirtless, wet hair, and ready to spill the entire story to Maddie, I stopped. She stood in the hallway, her hair wet from her shower, her bright blue eyes wide and staring right into mine. My cock twitched against the thin material of my sleep pants. Damn, she’s so beautiful.
A look of hunger in her eyes stunned me, freezing me in my spot and rendering me speechless.
Maddie moved towards me, not speaking, just slowly inching herself closer to me in the hall. Her hands reached up, touching my chest, sliding across my damp skin, and then rolling to my shoulders. She stood on her tippy toes, lifting herself up to m
y level. Our lips grazed against one another’s, and my mind drew a blank as to what I’d planned to do. Blood rushed to my cock, quickly pushing it against the thin material that restricted it from being unleashed.
Her kiss was so soft, so sensual that my entire body tingled when her tongue entered my mouth. “I’m sorry I’ve been so moody,” she whispered.
“You don’t have to apologize. I’m sorry I haven’t helped more,” I admitted as she pushed against me, making me take a step back towards my bedroom.
“You’re helping me now,” she exhaled, pushing me back another couple steps.
I stood in my room, the backs of my legs at the edge of my footboard. Maddie pushed her warm body against mine, letting her cold, damp hair graze over my skin.
Her sweet, delicate hands rolled off my shoulders and back to my chest. Her body lowered in front of me, her hands following with warm caresses down my stomach until stopping at the elastic band on my sleep pants. Her fingers pushed into the material, gripping the hem tightly as she pulled downward, releasing my hard cock with a wild bounce.
I looked down, her blue eyes staring up at me and her red lips wet from her tongue sliding across. Oh, fuck yes; suck me, baby.
My hands reached into her wet locks of blonde hair while she brought her mouth to the tip of my cock. I jolted a little from the sensation of her mouth wrapping around me, and then exhaled hard as she slid her lips down my shaft.
Her eyes continued to look up at me, driving me wild with pleasure as she bobbed between my legs. My ball sack rested in her hand as she gently squeezed and released. I tightened my grip on her hair, entangling my fingers through her locks, and started moving her to the rhythm that worked best. She followed along, sucking hard on my erection, and letting her tongue drag along the large, bulging vein down my shaft. Tiny flicks, tightened cheeks, and the warmth of her saliva was enough to make me explode, but I wanted to wait. Her blue eyes penetrated my soul as she worked her mouth vigorously up and down my manhood. My grip on her hair tightened a bit more as I pulled her away from my cock. Her lips suctioned onto my flesh, and her eyes narrowed with a satisfied tease. She wasn’t ready to let go, but I wasn’t ready to come. I wanted to be inside of her, to feel her pussy squeeze me into submission.