by Sarah Wynde
But maybe she should tell him how she felt instead. What had Akira suggested? Say she was attracted, ask if he felt the same?
She didn’t really need to ask, though. She could see the desire in his eyes. She took a step closer, opening her mouth, not sure what she was going to say, but he spoke first.
“I wanted to say good-bye,” he said.
“What?” She fell back the step she’d just taken.
He thumbed toward his truck, parked a few spaces down from her car. “Heading out now.”
“You’re leaving?” Her voice sounded odd to her ears.
He nodded, his own smile fading. “Feels like the right time.”
It was not the right time. It was totally the wrong time. Of course, anytime would be the wrong time, but still — they hadn’t had a chance to talk. She hadn’t told him anything: not what had happened, not what she thought, not how she felt, nothing.
“But are you well enough?” It wasn’t what she wanted to say. “You nearly died.”
“Yeah, I feel fine. Better than.”
“That’s good.” Grace swallowed. She wanted to object. She wanted to tell him he couldn’t leave. She knotted her hands together, fighting the urge to reach out and touch him. “Where are you going?”
“DC, to start. Taking Sophia back to her parents.”
“Oh.”
More silence. Grace’s throat felt tight, choked. Not as if she was going to cry, but as if this moment — standing in the glow of an overhead light, surrounded by asphalt, the bright lights of the emergency room behind them — was a turning point in her life, a time when everything hung in a balance that she couldn’t see.
“And then home, eventually. It’s been a long time since I’ve been back. I need to see my family. Talk to them.”
Grace couldn’t argue with that. Family mattered.
Noah tipped his head, as if listening to a voice Grace couldn’t hear, then nodded. “Go ahead. I won’t go without you.”
“Sophia?” Grace asked.
Noah nodded. “She’s gonna visit the baby, and say good-bye to Dillon and Rose. They should still be there.”
“Dillon? I thought he was—” She made a swooshing movement with her hand. “Out of here. Moving on.”
“Not quite yet, I guess. The others have, though.”
“That’s good.” Grace didn’t know whether she was saying it was good that Dillon was still around or good that the others weren’t — the words were automatic, just meaningless sounds as she gazed into Noah’s eyes.
She didn’t want him to leave.
Her father was right, Noah belonged in Tassamara.
He belonged with her.
“I wanted to thank you before I left,” Noah continued.
‘Thank you’ was not a declaration of desire. Grace didn’t want to be thanked.
“For what?”
His ridiculously beautiful mouth curved up in a smile. “Saving my life?”
“Oh. That.” Grace’s mouth twisted. She’d had plenty of time in the waiting room while Akira was in labor to consider every moment of the day’s events. She shook her head. “No, I screwed up.”
He raised an eyebrow.
“The scalpel you used was right there on the floor. If I’d thought for two seconds, I would have realized you must have opened the medical supply closet and remembered the trauma kits. I was using my shirt when there were fancy hemostatic coagulation bandages designed to stop bleeding two feet away from us.” She sighed. “Well, maybe ten feet. Either way…” She shook her head again. “Don’t thank me.”
“I wouldn’t have made it without you.”
“I’m glad you did.” More than glad, although she couldn’t explain to him what his survival meant to her without getting into complicated stories about orange juice glasses and failing when she’d never had a chance. About guilt and forgiveness, holding on and letting go.
Plus, the world was better with him in it.
Not that he was going to be in her world for long, not if he was leaving.
“I wanted to apologize, too, for the short notice. Although it’s not like you ever really needed another security guard.” His wry smile invited her to share the irony, but she couldn’t bring herself to smile back.
“It’s not a problem.” That sounded too abrupt and like she didn’t care. She did care, way too much. She tried to smile. “Although the job will always be there for you, if you…” She let the words trail off.
If you want to come back, if you need a job.
If you miss me as much as I’m going to miss you.
Nope, she couldn’t say that.
His eyes hadn’t left hers. His gaze was searching. “So…” he started.
She tilted her head in question, not trusting her voice.
“We’re alone,” he said. “First time ever, really.”
Her heart started to beat faster. She could hear it thudding in her ears. She stepped closer to him, stopping only when they were almost toe-to-toe.
“Are you shy?” she asked, lifting her face to his.
He ran his fingers up her arms, his touch light. “I admit, the crowd scene has been a little off-putting.”
“Scared they might judge your technique?”
“Something like that.” His hands reached her face. He cupped her cheeks, and for a moment just held her, looking into her eyes. Then he bent his head and took her lips.
She melted. For weeks, she’d been wondering about that kiss in the forest. Had it really been as good as she remembered or had her memory added flourishes?
It was as good as she remembered. Maybe even better. There was none of the awkwardness of a first kiss, the uncertainty of tasting a stranger. Instead, they fit together like they’d been designed for it.
His lips against hers were magic. Her brain turned off. All the worries, all the what-ifs, got lost in a flood of sensation. His hands against her skin, the rush of desire running through her veins, her body flushing with heat and lust.
Time stopped.
All there was, was the moment she was in, his scent, his flavor, his feel. She wanted him with a straightforward intensity that had nothing to do with tangled emotions.
And then he pulled away.
She him go reluctantly, but he leaned forward, resting his forehead against hers.
“Damn,” he whispered.
She laughed, breathless, but a hint of tears stung the back of her eyes. He was going to walk away. She could feel it in his body, in the energy coursing through his shoulders and arms. She should let go of him, step back herself, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it.
And then she did.
She let her hands drop to her sides. He was leaving and as much as she wanted him to stay, she could see that he needed to go.
“Sophia’s back,” he said. “She says the baby looks like an alien.”
Grace’s chuckle was genuine. “She’s beautiful. For a newborn.”
“I guess I’ll have to take your word for it.” He glanced at the hospital. “They’re trying to sleep.”
“Yeah.”
He nodded. There was a pause, and then he indicated his truck with a tilt of his head. “I should get on the road. Long drive ahead of me.”
She nodded.
They stared at one another for one more long silent moment.
And then he turned and walked away.
Grace didn’t mope. Or at least she told herself she wasn’t moping. There were two weddings to plan, adoptions to arrange, a newborn baby to hold, and a company to run. Who had time to mope?
But Maggie fed her comfort food every time she ate at the diner, Max asked her to come kayaking at least twice a week, and Zane moved the Ms. Pac-Man machine out of storage and back into his office. Mrs. Swanson tsk-ed, shook her head, and suggested lavender. Even Lucas was uncharacteristically gentle, although that might have been Sylvie’s influence.
Only Natalya didn’t seem to notice or care whether Grace was moping or not. B
ut she had five children to take care of, and happy-ever-after with five children wasn’t quite as simple as a few signatures on some dotted lines.
Still, the days passed and Grace did her best to keep a smile on her face. She was not unhappy, she told herself firmly. What had happened, after all? A cute guy came to town and then left. It’s not like there was any more between them than a couple of kisses and a few intense moments.
And if she lay awake at night wishing for what might have been, the evidence was easy enough to cover up with some over-priced under-eye concealer.
Her smile finally wore off on the day of the weddings. Plural, because Natalya had easily welcomed the idea of a double wedding with Sylvie and Lucas. Grace served as maid-of-honor to both brides, juggling bouquets and bachelorette parties with her usual efficiency.
The early afternoon ceremonies were held outside, underneath a gazebo built for the occasion next to the lake by Natalya’s new house. The guest list included Colin’s enormous extended family, Sylvie’s sizable extended family, every local employee of General Directions and more than a few who traveled to be there, plus most of the town.
The reception was picnic-style at the house, kids running everywhere, gigantic outdoor fans under tents trying to keep the crowd cool in the June heat, flowers and music and food and people… and after the ceremonies, the reception line, the posing for photographs, and the first toasts, Grace was just done with the whole thing.
She grabbed a glass of champagne from a passing tray and beat a retreat into the house. She wasn’t alone inside — people were flowing through the house, with plenty of guests opting for the temporary comfort of air-conditioning, plus the catering crew working out of the downstairs kitchen — so she headed for the stairs. She’d find a quiet place to sit, maybe the third floor patio overlooking the lake. But on the second floor landing, midway up the split-back flight of front stairs, she could hear voices from the third floor. It sounded like a few of the older kids were waging some sort of video game war in the upstairs great room. Not exactly the peace she had in mind.
Wrinkling her nose, she paused on the second floor, debating. Unfurnished guest room, one of the kids’ bedrooms… but no. Movie theater room, of course. There’d be a movie playing — Natalya had programmed a day’s worth of kids’ movies on the digital theater system and then locked it down to “entertain the smaller guests while avoiding arguments” — but at least no one would talk to her.
Grace slipped into the theater. It was empty. Perfect.
But a movie was just starting.
The Little Mermaid.
Damn it, Nat.
Grace sighed and took a seat in the middle row. She shouldn’t blame her sister for playing one of her favorite animated movies. There was no way Natalya could know how personal it had become to her. It was just a movie.
But when Ariel sang about being the girl who had everything and still wanting more, Grace’s mouth twisted. She had everything, too, but yeah, she wanted more.
She wanted Noah.
Ariel could sing all she liked about people and warm sand and answered questions, but she wanted her prince, too. And so did Grace.
So how was she going to get him? She’d let Noah go, feeling like it was the right thing to do, but if Ariel was willing to make a deal with the devil — sea witch, whatever — and give up her voice, surely Grace ought to be willing to get on a plane and at least tell Noah how she felt.
She was so lost in her head that she didn’t even look when someone came into the room and sat down next to her.
At least not until he leaned over and whispered, “All right, point taken. She’s not singing about wanting the guy, is she?”
Grace gaped.
Noah grinned at her.
He looked beautiful. Of course, he always looked beautiful, but he was dressed for a wedding — gray suit, a navy-striped tie, clean-shaven, his hair trimmed — and elegant was a good look on him.
But it wasn’t just the clothes. His eyes had lost their shadows.
“You… you… what are you doing here?” Grace stammered.
“I was invited,” he replied.
“Natalya called you?”
“No.” His grin grew wider. “Not exactly.”
“Not exactly?”
“She handed me an invitation the day we met. Told me I didn’t need to RSVP. It’s been sitting in my truck ever since.”
“She—” Grace realized she was still gaping and closed her mouth.
“Everyone else called me, though. Everyone except you.”
“Everyone? Who?” Grace demanded.
“Your dad. Your brothers. Sylvie. Even Akira, although I think that was just because Zane passed her the phone. She sounded pretty out of it.”
“What did they say?” Grace wasn’t sure whether to flush with embarrassment or go kill her brothers. It was one thing for her to decide to look for Noah; another entirely for her family to be talking to him.
“Mostly they offered me jobs. Your dad offered to spin off a subsidiary for me.”
“What?” Grace’s response was indignant. “He can’t just do that.” Did her father have any idea of the paperwork involved in separating corporate assets? They had enough problems with the SEC already.
“As long as I picked one that could be based in Tassamara,” Noah continued. “Lucas and Sylvie offered me contract jobs. Zane suggested I work for Special Affairs, maybe part-time if I wanted to go to school. Akira…” He chuckled. “Akira asked if I wanted to be a nanny. I guess the baby doesn’t sleep?”
“She’s very lively,” Grace confirmed. The theater room wasn’t dark, but the lights were dim enough that she was searching his face, trying to catch every nuance of his expression. On the screen in front of them, Ariel was seeing Eric for the first time and falling in love.
What had Grace been saying? Oh, right, the baby. “Helen the Hellion, Zane’s calling her.”
“Yeah.” Noah chuckled. “Like that encourages a prospective nanny.”
“Are you going to be a nanny?”
“No.” Noah picked up her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers.
“What are you going to do?” Grace felt breathless, like suddenly there wasn’t enough oxygen in the room. Her heart was beating faster. All she could feel was the touch of Noah’s skin on hers, electricity shooting along her body like the lightning on the movie screen.
“I have no idea,” he said. “I took Sophia home to her parents. Those are some people who had life figured out until their kid broke their hearts. And then I went to visit Joe’s mom, and then home to my own mom. All along the way, I was trying to decide what I wanted to do with the rest of my life, what kind of job I wanted, what my career should be.”
“Those are some big questions,” Grace said softly. He hadn’t looked away from her. His eyes were on hers and he wasn’t smiling anymore.
“Yeah.” He nodded. “But they’re not the important ones, not really.” His fingers tightened around hers.
“No?” The warmth of his hand sent heat racing through her veins. His touch made it hard to concentrate on his words. But she knew what he was saying, she knew where he was going.
“No. What matters is where you are, and who you’re with. I don’t know what I’m going to do with my life, but I know I want it to be here. And I know I want you in it.”
Grace couldn’t speak — the happiness was too big, it felt like it was going to overflow and explode out of her in all directions.
“Although I’m not, you know, proposing marriage. Not before our first date, anyway,” he added hastily, as if her silence was a sign of concern.
“No?” Her smile was impossible to contain. She beamed at him, wondering if her happiness was lighting up the room. But then she glanced at the screen. The storm was over, Ariel had saved Eric, and the movie was lighting up the room.
“That,” she said, nodding toward the screen.
“That?” Noah looked confused. “You want to go to th
e beach?”
She laughed. It was joy, this feeling, Grace realized. Bubbles of happiness were popping and fizzing in her bloodstream. She drew their entwined hands toward her heart, leaning toward him as Ariel sang.
“Oh,” he said, looking at the screen, putting the pieces together. “She saves him from drowning.”
“And falls in love,” she replied as he brought his face to hers.
“He does, too.” He let go of her hand, but only so he could run his up along her cheek and into her hair. “But it’s just their beginning.”
“Yep,” Grace murmured the words, her lips almost brushing his. “Be part of my world, Noah.”
“Always,” he replied and began to kiss her.
38
Dillon
The weddings were over.
The cake was cut and eaten.
The dancing was done.
And the Sheriff’s department’s scheduled hazardous waste disposal exercise — a full hour of confiscated illegal fireworks set off over the lake in a truly glorious display — was complete.
It was time.
“So you never committed any, like, major sins, right?” Sophia asked.
“For a person who thought death was the end of everything, you’ve gotten awfully worried about the rulebooks,” Dillon said, following Akira up the path to her front door.
“Hey, if I’m going to join you in your afterlife, I’d like to make sure it’s not gonna be any place too weird,” Sophia said as they reached the porch.
“It won’t be,” Dillon assured her. He hoped it wouldn’t be, anyway. He glanced over his shoulder at the reassuring soap-bubble shimmer of his doorway. It didn’t look like it would lead somewhere horrible. And Rose had promised him it would be okay.
“So when are we going?” Sophia asked.
“As soon as I say good-bye to Rose,” Dillon replied as Akira unlocked the door and they headed into the house.
He was surprised that Rose had left the reception early, but baby Helen had objected — strongly — to the fireworks and so Zane had taken her home. Rose had gone with them.