He stood up and went over to Elena’s desk and opened the drawer. He saw several of the things that he had given her over the years. Birthday cards, pictures, trinkets…Christmas cards—all from him, all with love from another time and another memory. He smiled as he thought of Elena finishing up with school and coming home to him. He thought of her moving in to his house, of them finally having the life that they were meant to have with each other. He couldn’t wait for that life to start a moment longer. He had to know her answer. He had to ask a question.
***
“I can’t tell you how glad I am that you are still here,” Cheryl said, smiling at Elena.
“I am pretty happy to be here myself,” Elena agreed. She looked to her right and closed her eyes. “My neck hurts so badly right now.”
Cheryl stood up, looking concerned. “Do you want me to go get the nurse?”
“No, the doctor told me it was going to take a while before the soreness would go away. Everything hurts,” Elena cried. “It’s awful.”
“I know, honey, I am so sorry that this happened to you.”
“Did…do you know if they got the guy that did this?”
Cheryl shook her head in disgust. “Yes. They got him, and his blood alcohol content was out the roof.”
Elena swallowed. “Did he come by and see me?”
“No, he couldn’t. They took him to jail. It was his third time.”
Elena took a deep breath and then let it out. “I saw my parents.”
Cheryl turned her head and looked at her curiously. “You saw what?”
“I saw my parents. I was dead, wasn’t I?”
Cheryl’s mouth fell open and she looked at Elena in shock. “Y-yes. You were. You saw them?”
Elena nodded slowly. “My mom and dad were there, and so were Holton’s parents. They didn’t come until later, but they were there.”
“What did they say?”
“They smiled at me and told me about the accident. I already knew about the drunk driver…mom.”
“Oh God, Elena, I didn’t even think about that. We never said a word.” Cheryl’s hand went up to her mouth. “I can’t believe this…did they say anything else?”
“They told me that I was almost dead…I asked them if I was, and my mom said that I had a choice. I told her I made a promise to Holton that I wouldn’t die.” Elena smiled softly. “Mom said that you can’t promise something like that. I told her that I did and I wanted to keep that promise.”
“And you came back?”
Elena smiled. “Yeah, Dad talked to me and so did Holton’s parents. They were happy for us. And then I just woke up.”
“Elena, that’s unbelievable.”
“I know,” Elena agreed.
Just then, Holton walked through the door with a handful of red roses.
Cheryl smiled and stood up. “I’ll leave you two alone. Love you, Elena.”
“Love you, Cheryl,” Elena replied.
“So, what are these for?” Elena asked as Holton placed the vase full of roses on the stand beside her bed. Holton smiled at her and sat on the chair that Cheryl just vacated.
“Don’t you remember?” Holton asked gruffly.
“What?”
“When you were 14 you asked me where I would take you on a date.”
Elena giggled at that and covered her mouth with her hand. “Yes, I remember.”
“I am going to take you to Lento’s as soon as I can get you out of here, but I thought you deserved the roses now. If you’re good, I’ll get you some more.”
“How good do I have to be?”
“I love you, Elena. I think I always have.” Holton grabbed hold of Elena’s hand and felt overwhelmed with just being there. “When you were unconscious I kept having these memories. Things that I guess I sort of kept suppressed. I kept thinking of all of our special times together. When I taught you how to drive, when I should you how to feed Pickles…”
“Oh wow. You really did take a trip down memory lane, didn’t you?”
Holton laughed and brought her hand up to his lips. She closed her eyes and smiled softly. “I can’t live another day without you, Elena.”
Elena opened her eyes and looked right into Holton’s.
“I have to have you as my wife.”
Elena’s lip trembled and her eyes were watery.
“Will you marry me?” Holton asked.
“Yes,” she said as she nodded. She looked into his eyes and grinned. “Yes, yes, yes, yes and yes.”
Holton smiled and leaned in, kissing Elena slowly. “I brought your ring. Feel like putting it on?”
“Of course I do,” Elena replied sweetly. She reached up to his neck and pulled him back down to her. “Kiss me some more.”
Chapter 15
A week after the accident, Elena was finally able to go home. Instead of going back to her apartment in Sunnybrook, however, she went home with Holton to Dallas.
She wasn’t able to do much and Holton knew that. He told the doctors and Elena that he would be the one to take care of her. Her care would take months until she would be able to walk on her own as well as help herself to do regular things—even using the restroom.
“I feel like such an idiot, Holton. I mean…I don’t want you seeing me like this.”
“Elena, we’re going to be married, it’s now or never.”
Elena thought back to a conversation with Cheryl about her and her boyfriend and she laughed.
“What are you laughing for?”
“Oh, this thing that Cheryl said to me.”
“What’s that?”
“She said that sooner or later I was going to see you do the deed.”
Holton chuckled. “Well, we can try not to see each other do that I suppose.”
“Why, don’t you want to see?” Elena asked, laughing.
“Not really, but I suppose it won’t be the end of the world if I do.”
“That is so nasty!”
“I agree, but it happens.”
“Dear Lord. So, how do we do all this?” Elena asked, feeling self conscious.
“One day at a time. Are you sure you don’t want to get married now?”
“I don’t care what people say, Holton. I can’t get married to you like this—I won’t. I want to walk down the aisle. That is something that I have dreamed about since I was a little girl. We don’t have family, so we lost out on that. I won’t have my father walk me down the aisle, but I want to walk down to you. I want to marry you more than anything, you have to know that.”
“I know, baby. I will do whatever you want to do.”
“It’ll only be a few more months and we can get married and start this thing…”
Holton smiled and put his arms around Elena. She had a bracing that she had to wear pretty much all the time now until her back healed. “I can be patient,” Holton said, saying the same words she used years ago.
Elena caught the significance. “I can, too.”
***
A few hours later, Holton came in with a smile on his face. “How’s my patient?”
“Alright I guess,” Elena said sheepishly.
“Okay, what’s wrong?” Holton asked, concerned.
Elena’s face reddened. “I have to use the restroom.”
“Baby, any time you have to do that, just call me. You don’t have to sit there and suffer.”
“I know, but you were working.”
“Honey, you are much more important than work. Give me two seconds to move a few things out of the way and I will come and get you and take you there.”
“Okay,” Elena said quietly. This is it, Elena thought horrified.
“Okay, so, I need to get you into the wheel chair. Now the Doc showed me how to do it, but was that comfortable for you?”
“Yeah, it was fine.”
“Okay, Honey. Here,” he said as he placed his arm carefully under her legs and the other firmly against the bracing on her back. “This may twinge. I really hope
it doesn’t,” Holton said as he picked her up with ease.
Elena took a sharp breath and then let it out slowly as he sat her down in the chair. “You okay?”
“Yes, everything is fine.”
Holton rolled her into the biggest bathroom he had, which was down the long hallway leading to his office. “You should be able to move better in here,” he said as he helped with her pants.
“Oh God,” Elena cried.
“What?! Did I hurt you?”
“No, this is just. Can you close your eyes?”
Holton chuckled. “Baby, it’s okay. It’s just the restroom.”
“What is with people and seeing people go?”
“It’s you, Elena. I don’t care.”
“I do!” she cried. “Please, just close your eyes.”
“But—”
“Just do it,” Elena scolded. She reached her hand as far as she could and grunted. Holton’s eyes flew open. “Could you please just give me something like a stick?”
“This is stupid. I am here to help you.”
“You may think it’s stupid, but I don’t!”
“Elena, don’t cry and don’t be mad. Listen, if I was in an accident and needed help, would you help me?”
“Of course I would!”
“Well…what do you think I’m doing?”
“This is different.”
“How so?”
“Because women have seen you.”
Holton sighed. “How many women do you think have seen me? And, Elena, only one counts. You. Who cares? I am here with you. I love you.”
Elena’s lip trembled and she slumped in her chair. “Okay…”
“Okay,” Holton said as he carefully helped her onto the toilet. “Now, I am getting the hell out of here while you do that!” he joked.
Elena laughed. “Thank God. I thought I was going to have to hit you with something.”
She could hear Holton laughing behind the door.”
Much of the rest of the week was like that with Holton. He helped with things that Elena never thought she would have to get help with and every night they would sit down in the living room and talk and learn more about one another. It was like an endless series of dating.
“Honey, I’m home,” Holton said as he opened the door and came in from working the second half of the day.
“Hey there. Can I ask you something?”
“What’s that?”
“How many?”
Holton looked at her and then tilted his head. “How many what?”
“Women?”
“Where did that come from?”
Elena looked down at her hands and took a deep breath. “I just want to know.”
“Two.”
“Who?”
“Elena?”
“Who?”
“Grace and Beth.”
Elena had tears stream down her face. All she did was cry when he was working. She felt so worthless.
“Why are you doing this to yourself?”
“You were with her when you came to see me!”
“No. We weren’t together, Elena. I was with her one time…I have literally had sex twice.”
“Twice?”
“Yes, in my life. Two times.”
Elena’s eyes rounded. “What are you talking about?”
“It gets lonely being a moron, Elena. I told you about the first time. The second time I was dead drunk. Now you know why I don’t like to drink. It was the one time, and I have regretted it ever since. Beth Ann was drunk, too. We both woke up and didn’t really know what went on, but it was pretty obvious when we were naked the next morning.”
“When was this?”
“Just stop, Elena. Please.”
“When?”
“Thanksgiving.”
Elena nodded and looked up at the ceiling. She was supposed to come home that Thanksgiving and didn’t. Thanksgiving was always a time when Elena and Holton were together. It was the anniversary of his parents’ death.
Elena’s lip trembled and a few more tears escaped.
“My fault, again!”
“No, no. It wasn’t your fault.”
“What were you waiting for?”
Holton knew what she meant by the question and he shook his head, disgusted with himself. “The perfect moment. Timing. It was always timing with us.”
“Yeah, it was. Why?”
“Your parents, your age…”
“You keep saying this, Holton. They never had a problem with you.”
“Yes they did. Well, he did.”
“Who?”
“Your dad.”
“No, I know for a fact that he didn’t.”
“You don’t know. When your mother died your father told me that it you needed to go back to school, that your place wasn’t here in Dallas, that you weren’t meant for bigger things than this place.”
“No,” Elena shook her head. “That’s not true.”
“I’m not lying Elena. I was ready then, your freshman year. I came to your house. Your father met me at the door. He said he could tell that we were getting too close and that he thought it was best that I leave and let you go.”
Elena’s eyes widened. “Holton, you have to know that he just wanted me to get an education. He never said you weren’t good enough. I know my dad.”
“Well, that’s what he said. I respected his wishes then. I’m sorry to say I can’t now.”
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, Holt.”
“I’m not. I want to be here. I want you here with me, and if that’s me being selfish I’m sorry. I want you to finish your schooling, too, if that’s what you want. I talked to some of your professors and they’ve agreed to let you take the tests online for the rest of the semester. That way you can finish. The university is onboard with all of this, too.”
“You talked to the school?” Elena asked, surprised.
“Yeah.”
“Come here,” Elena said and Holton walked over to the couch and sat down.
“Are you mad?”
“No, Holt, I’m not. I’m a fool. You do love me, don’t you?”
“More than you can imagine.”
“Do you know how I know my dad approves of you?”
Holton shook his head and Elena continued. “I know because I saw him. I didn’t want to tell you until it was the right time, but I saw your mom and dad, too.”
“What are you talking about, Elena?”
“Why didn’t you tell me that I died?”
Holton’s eyes widened and he swallowed down the pain of that day. “What?”
“I saw them. They were waiting for me to come with them. I told them that I made a promise to you. Your dad, Holt, your dad told me to tell you that he approves of everything that you have done and that you are doing here.”
Holton’s eyes widened. “What!”
“He said that to me. Does that mean something to you?”
“Yes,” Holton said, trembling. “Yes it does. I’ve sold off half of my stock. I was going to talk to you about it, but I decided to farm the land. I’ve talked to the hands. I’m still going to keep a small amount of Herefords here, but the rest of the land will be for farming—corn and other vegetables.”
“I didn’t know that, Holt. I think…I think that’s great.”
“Was there anything else?”
“You believe me?”
“Of course I do, Elena. Yes.”
Elena smiled. “Your mother thanked me for taking care of you. They both love you very much and miss you. And my mother told me that I was going to be around for a very long time.”
Holton smiled. At that moment it felt like life lifted a ton of bricks right off his chest. He took a deep breath and hugged Elena a little too tightly. She winced, but then pulled him right back into her arms when he pulled back.
Chapter 16
The wedding was coming up quickly, and of course his first Valentine’s Day with Elena. It had be
en almost two weeks since Elena’s accident, and every day there was a new experience that Elena had to overcome and it was hard on her as well as Holton—harder probably. Not only was he taking care of both places, but he was basically her nurse as well.
He came home to help her with dinners, with getting her ready for baths, bedtime, even helping her get to the restroom. And this was every day, every afternoon…every night. Never once did he complain about anything. He came and went, taking care of both of them without even so much as a pause.
Elena missed Cheryl, she missed school and she missed the freedom of just being alone while she bathed or went to the restroom.
“Everything okay?” Holton asked as he came in after a full day of working outside. It was now, April and Elena was still unable to move on her own.
“Yes, I’m fine,” Elena replied morosely. “Just fu...great.”
Holton stopped where he stood and looked over at Elena. He moved his furniture around that way she could see out the window. There was a mini fridge by the couch that she could reach to get in and get a soda or a snack and a small microwave to the right of that in case she was hungry for something hot. Everything was just so and for her so she could live daily without complaint. She hated it.
“What’s happened?”
“I hate this!” Elena yelled. “I hate everything! I can’t take this anymore, Holton!” she cried. “I don’t want to live like this.”
Holton walked over to the couch to put his arms around her and she stopped him with a hand up in the air. “Don’t!”
“What can I do to help, baby?”
“I don’t want your help, Holton! I want to be able to walk, talk, run… I want to go to the bathroom on my own, to shower. I want to fuck…”
Holton’s eyes widened.
“Stop looking at me like that! You have seen me without everything, you’ve seen me at my worst, you’ve seen me and I haven’t so much as seen you. I hate this. We were supposed to see each other at the same time. We were supposed to make love and explore…you have seen me pee!”
The Long Ride Home (Cowboys & Cowgirls) Page 13