Squeezing Emily's hand, I wished for her beautiful smile. I wished that she would wake up and be okay. I also wished that I would find the son of a bitch that did this to her and make him pay.
Tears stung my eyes. The harder I tried to keep them buried, the pain in my chest worsened.
The door to the room opened and a nurse came in, one that I'd seen a few times before. I think her name was Kim. She was actually my favorite out of all the nurses. I wondered if she would tell me to go back to my room. I wasn't supposed to be in here this late, but I just couldn't stay away any longer.
"Hi, Reed. How's our patient doing?" she asked.
I wiped my eyes in case any tears had escaped as she walked over to the other side of the bed and added a bag of clear liquid, then adjusted the IV in Emily's hand.
"She's…" I hesitated, fighting back the lump rising in my throat. "I'm not sure. I just want her to open her eyes." My thumb moved over Emily's hand as I stared at her peaceful face.
"I know," she said, bringing a cart up to the side of the bed. "She's going to open her eyes. We just need to give her body some time to heal first. The doctor isn't going to like you being in here, you know. You need your rest, too." She gave me a pointed look and then her face softened.
I leaned in closer and wrapped both of my hands around hers. "When she opens her eyes, I want to be the first thing she sees."
"Okay, I think I can keep quiet, but I need to check on her and it would be helpful if you back up for just a minute while I check on your baby."
Your baby.
My baby.
Our baby.
The word baby still sounded foreign to me. It had been three days since the doctors told me Emily was pregnant, but I still hadn't gotten over the shock of the word yet.
I pushed my chair back, just enough for the nurse to do her job. My eyes followed the nurse's every movement and then they moved over to the monitor and I watched the screen come alive. I sat there and watched in both amazement and shock. This was all still sinking in. I wasn’t even sure Emily knew herself. The doctors said she was about six weeks pregnant and as far as they could tell, the baby was fine.
"Everything seems to be going great." The nurse smiled over at me.
The tightness in my chest eased a bit, yet I still couldn't shake the possibility that I could lose her, lose the baby. I was scared to death of being without her for another second.
My cell phone buzzed in the chair next to me. I leaned over to grab it, expecting it to be Lexi. She had been calling non-stop. She was in the hospital when I woke up and never left my side. I sent her home last night to get some rest.
When I glanced at my screen, I saw the call wasn't from Lexi. It was Robbins.
"I'll watch over her if you need to take that," the nurse said, glancing over at me.
I gave her a small nod and stood up. "Thank you." I leaned over and kissed Emily's forehead. "I'll be just a minute," I promised her.
My ribs ached and it hurt to stand, so I leaned against the wall on the other side of the hall.
"Robbins, talk to me. Tell me you found the son of a bitch." I winced. It hurt to breathe, let alone talk.
"I'm sorry, but we don't have much information. He hasn't returned to his residence in Las Vegas and we don't have any leads on where he's staying here in New York, if he's even still here."
The fucking coward. How can he just disappear? How can he not own up to what he did?
I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth, feeling the need to punch something to release the anger growing inside of me. I wanted him to pay for hurting Emily. I wanted him to pay for hurting our baby. I also wanted to keep him from ever hurting her again. This time, I wouldn't fail her. This time, I would keep my promise.
"I don't care what you have to do, Robbins, find him." I ended the call, took a deep breath and then headed back into the room. I didn't want to be away from her any longer than I had to be.
As I was making my way back across the hall, I heard Lexi's voice at the nurses’ station. She was trying to talk them into letting her come back and visit even though it was still thirty minutes until visiting hours started. Is it really almost eight in the morning? I didn't think I slept more than a few minutes during the night. I didn't want to miss it if Emily woke up.
Leaning against the wall, I peeked my head around the corner and saw Lexi standing there. The nurse turned in my direction and Lexi followed her gaze.
"Reed," she practically yelled. "What are you doing out of bed?" She looked like our mother as she stomped toward me. I knew I was about to get a lecture. "You should be resting. Do your doctors know you're down here?"
I sighed. "I couldn't be away from her. I came down here to check on her in the middle of the night and couldn't make myself leave."
Her face fell. "How is she doing?" she asked, wrapping her arm around me, helping support my left side, the one I didn't even realize I was holding.
Before turning around, I glanced toward the nurses’ station, and she gave us a wave of approval. The last thing I wanted was to be rude to the nurses. They were the ones that allowed me to come down here. I didn't want that to stop.
"Her condition hasn't changed." I took in a deep breath as we turned to make our way back down the hall toward her room. "She still hasn't opened her eyes."
"I'm so sorry, Reed. How's the baby? Have they said anything?"
"The nurse just checked her out. As far as she can tell, everything is fine."
EMILY
VOICES. BEEPING. Constant beeping. My eyes fluttered opened for just a second and then closed.
Forcing them open again, I looked at my surroundings, not recognizing anything I saw. As hard as I tried to keep them open, they fell closed again. Where am I?
The voices. The voices were getting louder. I knew those voices. How do I know those voices? My mind felt cloudy, confused. My body felt weak and sore. My eyes were tired and heavy. So heavy. I couldn't find the strength to open my eyes again.
"Okay, Emily. Everything looks good with you and your baby." A woman's sweet voice filled my ears.
Baby. Did she just say baby? Is she talking to me? She couldn't be talking to me. I don't have a baby. What is happening? Who is this woman? Where am I? There were so many questions that I wanted to ask. I wanted to demand answers, but I couldn't open my mouth to speak.
Open your eyes. Open your eyes. I repeated those three words over and over in my head a few times, hoping I would find the strength to open them, but they wouldn't budge.
More voices filled my ears, but they sounded more distant.
"I'm glad she's doing okay, but I'm a little concerned for you. You don't look so well."
That voice. I knew that voice. Lexi.
"I'm not leaving her. I want to be here when she wakes up. She has to know I'm here."
I knew that voice, too. Reed. He was okay. Reed was okay.
"She knows, Reed. She has to know."
"When the nurse is done checking on her and the baby, you should go see her. I think the more people she knows are here, the better."
Wait… did he just say, baby?
"I still can't believe she's pregnant. Why didn't she tell me?" Lexi asked.
What the hell is going on? Why are they talking about a baby and being pregnant? Am I hallucinating? Is this even real? Maybe I’m dreaming.
"There's a chance she had no idea. The doctors think she's about six weeks along," Reed answered.
Oh God. I have to be dreaming. There's just no way. I can’t be pregnant.
Open your eyes, Emily. Open your damn eyes so you can get some answers!
"This is just crazy. She's lying in a hospital bed right now and the asshole that did this to her is still out there." Lexi sounded mad. I didn’t think I'd ever heard her so angry before.
Images of Jake entered my mind, and then flashes from the night of the accident played over in my head.
Why can't I open my eyes? Why can't I speak?
A
s hard as I tried to push the images from that night far away, they came rushing back. Jake's face. His cold, dark eyes. Him in my apartment, choking me. Me fighting him off. Crawling through the window. Going to Reed's place. Seeing that he was still alive. Getting in the car, trying to escape. Jake chasing us in the car, trying to run us off the road. The accident. The image of Reed being pulled from the wreckage. The thought of Reed being dead again.
My heart raced. The beeping got louder, faster. I could feel myself drifting back into the darkness. I could feel it closing in around me.
REED
LEXI AND I were leaning against the door, waiting for the nurse to finish up her work. She had been so nice and patient with me, allowing me to stay in the room earlier, that I figured I could do the same and let her do her job in peace. It wasn't until I heard a loud, solid beeping noise that my heart shot up into my throat. When the nurse came rushing out of the room and screamed for a code blue, that was when I felt like I could actually pass out.
Nurses and doctors rushed toward us before I even had time to wrap my head around what was going on. I tried to push my way through, but a couple doctors told us we had to go in the waiting area. We weren't allowed in the room.
Those next few hours were some of the longest of my life. The only other time I felt that kind of fear was when I found out about my parents and when I learned that Lexi was badly injured and hanging on by a thread. Then, I was faced with losing my sister after I’d just lost my parents. Now, I was faced with losing the woman I loved and possibly my child.
"Have the doctors given you an update?" Lexi asked, handing me a cup of coffee. I shook my head, taking a sip.
"Not since earlier. There hasn't been much change in the last couple of hours. Her vitals are back to normal again and she's remained stable, but they still won't let me back there to see her."
She grabbed my hand. "I know it's tough. We just have to be patient and wait for her to wake up."
I swallowed hard, forcing the rising lump back down.
"The doctors said everything is back on track, right? And the baby is still doing well. We have to be thankful for that."
I smiled at her optimism. Then, not even a second later, the smile dropped from my face. Deep down, I knew there was a chance that Emily might never open her eyes again. I didn’t want to even think that was a possibility, but I knew it was true. I couldn’t lose her without ever telling her how I really felt about her. Even though our relationship had been great the past few weeks, I could still tell that Emily was reluctant to let me in completely. I had a feeling the secrets of her past she had been keeping from me was a huge reason why. Now, I was mad at myself for not telling her how I felt, for not telling her that I loved her.
"She's going to get through this, Reed. After all she's been through in her life, she's proven one thing above all else: she's a fighter."
I nodded and kissed her hand softly. "Yeah, I know."
"Do you want to take a break? Maybe go get some dinner or something? I'll stay to wait for an update." She looked at me with pity in her eyes.
"No. I don't want to leave her."
"Well, I'll go get some sandwiches, then. You need to eat."
"Thanks, Lexi, that would be great."
Lexi left the waiting room and I was alone again. Well, alone with a room full of strangers, all waiting to hear news on their loved ones.
The hours passed slowly and I fought to stay awake. Lexi had brought me another cup of coffee when she brought me the sandwich, but it didn't do me any good. I needed sleep. I hadn't slept much the night before, too scared that if I closed my eyes, then I would miss it when she woke up, even if it was for just a second. I wanted to be awake for her. I wanted to tell her how sorry I was for letting him hurt her again.
JAKE
WE HAD been laying low in New York for a few days. Rico wanted to go back to Las Vegas right away, but I couldn’t make myself leave the city. I couldn’t explain it, not even to myself, but I wasn’t ready to leave until I’d found out whether Emily lived or died.
Rico had been trying like hell to find out information about the accident and if there were any survivors, but it had been difficult. We didn’t have the connections here in New York that we did in Vegas. Finally, after a few days and hearing nothing, we left to go home.
Deep down, I knew that Emily was alive and I knew that when things cooled down, I’d come for her again. I’d beg her for her forgiveness and ask her to come back with me. If she didn’t oblige, well, I’d force her. Over time, she would forgive me and learn to love me again.
“It feels good to be home, boss.” Rico stretched out his legs and propped them up on the coffee table in the living room of the penthouse.
Normally, I’d give him a death stare and demand he take his feet off my table, but I didn’t have the strength or desire to open my mouth. Truth be told, it did feel good to be home. It felt good to be back in my city, where I had power and control. I just wished Emily was here with us, too. It killed me not knowing if she was dead or alive. I was hoping some of my guys in Vegas could find something out for me.
I was sitting across from Rico on the couch, staring down at the floor, lost in my own thoughts.
“You gonna be okay, boss? You haven’t said much since... you know, and you don’t look so good.”
Slowly, my eyes drew upward until I met his. “I’m fine. I just want to know if she’s alive or dead. Do what you can to find something out. I have to know.” My voice was lifeless.
He swung his feet off the table and they hit the floor with a loud thud. “You got it. I already have a couple of the guys looking into it. Let me go check to see what they’ve found out.”
As he stood up, there was a loud pounding at the door.
Rico gave me a sideways glance before answering it. I let out a low growl when I heard the voice of Officer Miller float down the hallway. He was, without a doubt, the person I hated the most in Vegas. He was one of the only cops who couldn’t be bought.
“Get out of the way, Rico. I know he’s in there. I saw him come in the building.”
“Yeah, he’s here, but that doesn’t mean you’re gonna get in here to see him.”
I heard a scuffle, coupled with a few loud grunting noises, and then Rico shouted, “Hey, you can’t come in here without a warrant.”
A few seconds later, I saw Miller enter the living room. When our eyes met, he grinned at me.
“You know, Jake. I’ve been working for the Las Vegas Police Department for five years now and ever since I started, I’ve wanted the opportunity to take you down. I just didn’t think it would be this easy.” His smile grew, and Rico finally appeared behind him, along with a handful of other cops.
“What are you talking about, Miller? I’m not in the mood for visitors.” I could feel my upper lip pull upward in disgust. I really hated this guy. My eyes glanced at the officer standing behind him. I knew most of them. Most of them were on my payroll and yet, they were all avoiding eye contact with me. Fucking cowards.
Miller chuckled and took a few steps forward. “Oh, you don’t have a choice this time, Jake. I need to know where you’ve been the last few days. We’re investigating a case in New York City, and lo and behold, your name was mentioned as the prime suspect in the case. Looks like you’ve finally slipped up and I’ve gotta tell you, I’m going to enjoy taking you in. Maybe more than I should.”
Glaring, I focused my eyes on Miller. Who did this guy think he was? Did he really think he could talk to me like that and get away with it?
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I growled. “I don’t know anyone in New York and I haven’t left Vegas for weeks. You can ask my staff here at the casino and my men, they’ll all vouch for me.”
Now it was me who was grinning. I’d covered my bases before I left Vegas. I’d used an alias name when traveling. I used a private plane, and I had plenty of alibis already set in place. They could look anywhere they wanted, but they wou
ldn’t be able to tie me to this.
“Well, let’s start with your staff, Jake. We’ll see how many people you’ve paid off and see if one of them will crack.” Miller smirked before he and his officers left the room.
Rico followed them out before coming back into the living room.
“Holy shit, boss. They moved fast. If they know your name, then that means....” His voice trailed off.
“It means my girl’s alive or that she told someone about me,” I finished the sentence for him.
REED
MY PHONE vibrated and I pulled it out of my pocket. It was Robbins calling.
"I'll stay. You go take that," Lexi said, glancing up from the book she was reading.
When I stood up, I instantly felt the soreness in my shoulder and in my ribs.
Taking just a few steps away from where I was sitting, I answered, "Tell me you found him." I didn't even bother saying hello. My patience was all run out, and I was too eager to hear what he had to say to me.
Holding my breath, I waited for his reply. I wasn't sure how much longer I could stand knowing that asshole was out there living while Emily was lying in a hospital bed.
"We did," he said finally, and I sighed loudly. "Mr. Terrell returned to his casino in Las Vegas just a few minutes ago. The cops showed up not long after him, and they have been inside with him ever since. What do you want me to do?"
What do I want you to do? I wanted him to kill him. I never wanted to give him the chance of hurting her again. I didn't want him to breathe another breath. I wanted him to pay. I wanted him to feel the pain that she'd had to feel.
Squeezing my eyes tight, I knew I couldn't have all of those things, not right now at least. "Keep me updated. Let me know when the cops leave. They better leave with him in cuffs."
The day went by without any change. It wasn't until the next morning that they allowed me to see her again. She looked the same but had a few more wires hooked up to her. The doctor made a few more rounds during the day but didn't have anything new to say. We were still waiting for her to wake up. I wanted to scream at him and ask him what the fuck that meant, but I knew it wasn't right to take my anger out on him. The only person that deserved my rage was Jake. I was getting anxious because I still hadn't heard back from Robbins. I was expecting a phone call that he had been arrested. That we were finally getting some justice.
The Hardest Part Page 21