And while some characters were cut out completely, two who were absent from the second draft return. Leia replaces Deak, becoming the unnamed princess of the Story Synopsis. She is reintroduced at the film’s outset, as she was in the treatment, instead of halfway through on Alderaan. The old man also acquires a name: General Ben Kenobi, who becomes the wizened old man/Jedi and occupies the role of mentor, originally filled by General Skywalker in the rough and first draft. He trains Luke in the ways of the Force, becoming an important foil in the student’s voyage of self-discovery. Perhaps due to Lucas’s appreciation of Campbell’s analysis of mythology, Luke is more of a loner; he is stripped of his brothers and cousins—and now his father is a dead Jedi.
In late July and early August, McQuarrie returned to work on The Star Wars, doing costume designs. One of them is a first look at General Ben Kenobi. The sleeveless shirt recalls the garb of a samurai from one of Kurosawa’s films.
Lucas’s notes from the time indicate major plot revisions—“princess send Luke to Old Ben”—and ideas that didn’t quite make it into the third draft: “combine Han and Biggs.”
Luke’s voyage is also more defined in the third-draft notes, as it becomes more related to the Force, which he learns about in specific stages: “1) Luke learns about Force (in desert); 2) Luke tries to experience Force (in ship); 3) Luke becomes a man of the Force (Alderaan); 4) Ben explains Luke’s experience (in ship); 5) Luke with crystal struggles with Force (on Yavin).”
“I have come to the conclusion that there is a force larger than the individual,” Lucas says. “It is controlled by the individuals, and it controls them. All I’m saying is that the pure soul is connected to a larger energy field that you would begin to understand if you went all the way back and saw yourself in your purest sense.”
Another note reads, “Learn about the Force—all around us in every living creature.” It is defined in similar terms by Kenobi in the third draft. As the hero’s journey becomes more linked to the Force, the Kiber Crystal’s importance naturally fades. Primarily a “MacGuffin”—a plot element that Alfred Hitchcock defined as an item of no emotional significance, but which keeps the story moving—the crystal also has a new rival in the plans to the Death Star. It thus moves far into the background, as the third draft has little space for two MacGuffins.
The crystal, however, is still part of the aerial attack on the Death Star—the last element to undergo structural alterations. “Between the second and third drafts, Luke stopped on the surface on the Death Star,” Lucas says. “He and Artoo had to go and take the bomb by hand, open up the little hatch, and drop the bomb in it—then they had fifteen seconds or something to get off the surface before the thing blew up—but as they were going back to the ship, Darth Vader arrived. So Luke and Vader had a big swordfight. Luke finally overcame Vader and then jumped in the ship and took off. But in trying to intercut the dogfight with the old-fashioned swordfight, I realized that the film would have just stopped dead. It was too risky.
“I feel that I’m fairly decent at construction, not necessarily plot, but construction,” Lucas says of these changes. “Neither Graffiti nor THX had plots. I’m not really interested in plots. That’s one of the problems I’ve had with this movie—it’s a plotted movie, and I find plots boring because they’re so mechanical. You go from here to there, and once you know what’s going to happen, that’s it. And I just am not enthralled with that kind of action. I’m much more into the scenes and the nuances of what’s going on. I find that fascinating.”
Lucas wrote notes on Luke’s cognitive progression in relation to the Force, followed by a list of words formulating key ideas for the film.
The Star Wars: From the Adventures of Luke Starkiller, Third-Draft Summary, August 1975
The REPUBLIC GALACTICA is dead. Ruthless trader barons, driven by greed and the lust for power, have replaced enlightenment with oppression, and “rule by the people” with the FIRST GALACTIC EMPIRE.
For over a thousand years, generations of JEDI KNIGHTS were the guardians of peace and justice in the galaxy. Now these legendary warriors are all but extinct. One by one they have been hunted down and destroyed by the sinister agents of the Emperor: the DARK LORDS OF THE SITH.
It is a period of civil wars. Rebel Armies, striking from fortresses hidden deep within the Great Rift, have won a crushing victory over the powerful Imperial Starfleet. The Emperor knows that one more such defeat will bring a thousand more solar systems into the rebellion, and Imperial control of the Outland systems could be lost forever. To crush the rebellion once and for all, the Emperor has sent one of his most ferocious Dark Lords to find the secret rebel strongholds and destroy them …
In the third draft only one Star Destroyer pursues the rebel ship above Utapau. Time is more condensed now: The exterior shot segues immediately into a pitched interior battle with the stormtroopers, who blast their way through the smaller ship’s front door. On the planet below, while checking a mechanical rig that resembles a “Christmas tree,” Luke Starkiller notices bright lights in the sky, so he travels to the power station to tell his friends—Fixer, Camie, Deak, and Windy. When he arrives he meets his old pal, Biggs, who has just returned from the military academy.
Back on the ship, we’re introduced to Princess Leia Organa:
A beautiful young girl about sixteen years old huddles in a small alcove as the stormtroopers search through the ship. She is LEIA ORGANA, a rebel princess. The fear in her eyes slowly gives way to anger as the muted crushing sounds of the approaching stormtroopers grow louder. She steps from her hiding place and blasts two troopers with her laser pistol, but she is greatly outnumbered and quickly captured.
She is brought to Darth Vader, who tells her the information she intercepted will soon be recovered. The robots escape and are eventually bought by Owen Lars, who is Luke’s uncle.
Back on the planet surface, Biggs tells Luke about the Academy. Meanwhile, Vader tortures Leia in the Alderaan prison; he wants to know where he can find the stolen information—and the rebel base.
During dinner, Owen confesses that he has used Luke’s education money to buy the robots, so Luke will have to save up again to attend the Academy. Luke is dismayed, but shortly thereafter is intrigued to discover that the robots have been involved in the “Counter Wars” against the Empire. He tells them that he wants to be a “startrooper” and fight like his father, who was a Jedi. Accidentally, he triggers a message in R2:
Alex Tavoularis’s third-draft storyboards reveal Princess Leia Organa as she is captured aboard her rebel ship.
The fragment breaks loose with a snap, sending Luke tumbling head over heels. He sits up and sees a small (15 inch) 3-D hologram of Leia Organa, the rebel princess, being projected from the face of little Artoo. The image is a rainbow of colors as it flickers and jiggles in the dimly lit garage. Luke’s mouth hangs open in awe.
LEIA
Whoever finds this message, I beg you see this R-2 unit delivered safely to the authorities on Organa Major. It is of the most vital importance to all free systems. I guarantee in the name of the United Assembly that you will be richly rewarded for your efforts …My Commanders, use fix Arra Code …X loc tan too nine, I am lost. The Sith Lord will surely take me to Alderaan. You must continue alone …
After deliberating over the risks presented by this haphazard quest, Luke leaves a “video-slate” message that says:
LUKE
Aunt Beru, Uncle Owen, I don’t mean to hurt you and I know you’ve been good to me, but I’m leaving. There are important things I must do. I’ve taken my speeder and the “droids” which you bought with my savings. I’ve also taken my father’s lightsaber. You can keep everything else. I am grateful for all you’ve done. I’ll miss you, Aunt Beru. I love you both …
Luke and the robots take the landspeeder and head out to find an old friend of Luke’s father: “General Kenobi was my father’s commander, and he is probably the greatest of all the Jedi knights … or at le
ast my father thought so.” Following a skirmish with aggressive desert nomads called Tusken Raiders, who loom up in front of his electrobinoculars, Luke is tied up and left dangling, rotating in the air, when…
A huge menacing shadow on the canyon wall gives way to a shabby old desert rat of a man, who appears to be at least seventy years old. His ancient leathery face, cracked and weathered by exotic climates, is set off by dark, penetrating eyes, and a scraggly white beard. BEN KENOBI squints his eyes as he scrutinizes Luke in his predicament.
“You’re General Kenobi?!? The Jedi Knight? The commander of the White Legions?” asks a disbelieving Luke, who introduces himself as the son of Annikin Starkiller, and says he knows Ben’s Diary of the Clone Wars by heart. But Ben is hesitant to join Luke on a new adventure; he is old and, as he illustrates by breaking open his arm, now partly mechanical. Ben fixes his arm, but admits he has little of the Force left in him…
BEN
Let’s just say the Force is something a Jedi Warrior deals with. It is an energy field in oneself, a power that controls one’s acts, yet obeys one’s commands. It is nothing, yet it makes marvels appear before your very eyes. All living things generate this Force field, even you …It surrounds you and radiates from you. A Jedi can feel it flowing from him …
(patting his stomach)
…from here! …When a creature dies, the force it generated remains. The Force is all around us. It can be collected and transmitted through the use of a Kiber Crystal. It’s the only way to amplify the power of the Force within you.
Ben explains that his Kiber Crystal was taken at the Battle of Condawn—during which Luke’s father was killed. One of Ben’s disciples took the crystal and became a Sith Lord. The few crystals that remain are in the possession of the Sith Lords on Alderaan.
Across the galaxy these same Sith Lords, in a crystal chamber on Alderaan, feel that Ben Kenobi has joined the fight against them.
VADER
Something old has been awakened. The Force has suddenly grown stronger. We must travel future paths with caution.
Ben and Luke go to the Mos Eisley cantina, where Kenobi cuts down bullies who attack Luke. They then meet Chewbacca, who leads them to Docking Bay 23 and Captain Han Solo. “She’s been to Terminus and back,” he says of his ship. Luke and Ben leave to raise money for their passage, while Solo fends off Jabba the Hutt, who comes to collect a debt; apparently Solo has built his own vehicle, but Jabba paid for it. Solo triggers a fake reactor problem, which causes Jabba and his cohorts to flee—all except Montross. Solo outdraws him and tells him to get lost.
Soon afterward, they all blast off in the ship, when Ben suddenly feels that the planet Organa Major has been destroyed. On Alderaan, Vader tells Princess Leia, in her cell, that the Death Star is operational:
VADER
It would be much easier if you were to tell us where the outposts are …Otherwise we’ll be forced to destroy every suspicious system …What a waste …
Vader starts to leave.
LEIA
You’ll never stop them …No matter how many machines you build.
The door slides closed behind Vader, leaving Leia alone in the darkness.
Ben tells Han to go instead to Alderaan so they can rescue the princess, using money to motivate him. The old Jedi is confident that Leia won’t submit to mind control, due to the fact that she is “a swan sensana.” On the journey, Ben begins teaching Luke the ways of the Force, using a lightsaber and training remote; Solo is unconvinced and blasts the remote with his pistol.
As in previous drafts, they play possum to penetrate the Alderaan defenses. When the ship touches down, Ben leaves to find the Kiber Crystal, telling Luke, “May the Force be with you.” Han and Luke disguise themselves as stormtroopers, but it is Solo and Chewbacca who open her cell door and find the princess: “Suspended inside the cell by invisible rays, a bloody and mutilated Leia Organa hangs upside down. A strange yellow glow radiates from her eyes.” Chewbacca flings her across his shoulders. Meanwhile Ben looks for the Kiber Crystal, accidentally going into Classroom 96:
The pirate ship is escorted by TIE fighters into the Imperial prison floating city of Alderaan in these Tavoularis storyboards.
Ben finds himself in a small conference room filled with about a dozen or so bureaucrats listening to an instructor who is explaining a type of technical philosophy. The class turns and stares at the old man. Ben raises his hands and all the bureaucrats, including the instructor, begin coughing and grabbing at their throats. They are unable to breathe and eventually collapse on the floor.
The others penetrate the bowels of the city, which now have a slimy, liquid ground cover. Ben eventually finds the pedestal on which the Kiber Crystal rests and gains renewed strength from its presence. Luke and company encounter a vicious Dia Nogu creature, but the resourceful Leia regains consciousness and takes charge, bantering with Han. They have various close shaves before Leia makes them slide down a garbage chute. Han declares: “I’ve got a very bad feeling about all this.”
Ben is intercepted by Darth Vader, who tells the old man:
VADER
I’ve been waiting …At last we meet again …It could only have been you …
BEN
The Force of the Bogan has grown strong with you. I expected your master …
VADER
You were once my master, but I am the master now …the Crystal will be of little use to you …Your powers are weak …Old man, you should never have come back.
Their lightsabers clash, but stormtroopers enter the fray and manage to wound Ben—just before Luke returns with his friends and helps him back aboard. The pirate ship takes off, and the crew defend themselves from marauding fighters. Leia then reveals that R2-D2 is carrying the plans for a giant battle station—the Death Star.
The fourth moon of Yavin is still their destination, and they take lifepods to travel there from the ship. Ben gives Luke the glowing Kiber Crystal; Tarkin debriefs the rebel pilots, instead of Dodona (the two have switched roles, with Dodona being the cowardly general); and the attack on the Death Star commences. As in the second draft, the Death Star is seen for the first time as it approaches Yavin. Only R2 accompanies Luke this time, as the starfighter is much smaller and the astromech droid is now part of the outer shell. During the raid, Luke grasps the Kiber Crystal, and Vader and Luke seem to sense each other. Luke again makes two runs on the exhaust port, and Han makes a surprise return to save Luke from the pursuing Darth Vader. It is Luke who fires the shot that destroys the Death Star, but the Sith survives …
Vader’s starship with a bent solar fin limps into the vast darkness of space attempting to make it back to the relative safety of Alderaan.
Back on Yavin 4, Princess Leia hands out medals to the new heroes:
Old Ben is sitting to the right of the Princess, while the Grand Mouff Tarkin sits on her left. Leia is dressed in a long, white dress and is staggeringly beautiful. She rises and places a gold medallion around Han’s neck, then repeats the ceremony with Chewbacca, the robots and finally Luke. They turn and face the assembled troops, who all bow before them.
* * *
STAR WARS PROGRESSION
• Windy and Biggs are no longer twins, each becoming a friend of Luke’s; Deak, Luke’s brother in the second draft, is replaced by Princess Leia aboard the rebel ship (Deak and Windy are “two tough boys”)
• Vader kills rebel officer (rips arm off; throws objects with Force)
• Princess Leia places the Death Star plans into R2-D2 (and sends him to “whoever” on planet surface)
• R2-D2 is Owen’s second choice (bought when Luke notices a bad motivator on his first choice)
• Vader uses torture robot on Leia (in Alderaan prison)
• Biggs Darklighter, a cadet, friends with Luke
• C-3PO has oil bath
• Luke watches twin suns
• General Ben Kenobi (name added to old man/Jedi, half-man/half-machine)
&
nbsp; • Tusken Raiders, savage desert nomads who ride banthas, attack Luke
• Ben Kenobi rescues Luke
• “Lasersword” now a “lightsaber”
• At his house, Ben explains the Force to Luke, and one character must convince the other to deliver valuable information
• Han Solo owes Jabba the Hutt money (for construction of ship)
• Kenobi senses the destruction of planet (Organa Major)
• Kenobi tells Luke to feel the Force, with training remote
• “May the Force be with you,” Ben says
• General Kenobi can walk around unnoticed thanks to the Force
• Heroes flee into an area (on Alderaan) covered with slimy liquid and encounter a Dia Nogu, which yanks Luke underwater
• Princess finds access to the garbage chute
• Luke fires shot that destroys the Death Star
* * *
The Making of Star Wars (Enhanced Edition) Page 13