by Laura Ziepe
‘Mmm …’
Adele could tell Chloe wasn’t impressed, so she changed tack, and sucked up to her. ‘That’s because you’re stunning and everything looks great on you. You’re right, I’m sure it looks better on.’
Before Chloe could answer, her mum called her for dinner.
‘You don’t suppose I could stay too, do you?’ Adele asked cheekily.
Chloe nodded. ‘I’m sure it’s fine.’
*
The following day Adele’s alarm clock sounded at eight a.m. and she pressed the snooze button and hugged her pillow even tighter. Waking up this early was such a chore! She couldn’t be late today though. She willed herself not to fall back into a nice, relaxing sleep, which she was finding exceptionally difficult.
She had to go all the way to Chelsea today for the photo shoot. She was going to get a taxi, but decided with the morning traffic it was probably quicker to get the tube. The awful, smelly, dismal tube, usually packed with civilians getting on with their dreary lives and their tedious little nine-to-five jobs.
She had given herself time to put some make-up on and get ready. After all, she was meeting a model today. She didn’t want to look like some tramp next to her. Skye always looked incredible. Adele had Googled images of her professional modelling shots and was fascinated how someone could always look so good. She must have her pick of any men, she assumed resentfully.
Adele plastered on her make-up, always preferring to wear more than less. It made her feel more confident. She would never leave the house bare faced. Even if there was a fire she’d save her make-up bag and apply it as soon as she found safety. She added her Chanel lip gloss and smiled, recoiling as she noticed yellowish stains on her teeth, which she knew were from smoking. She’d tried to quit countless times, but it was impossible. Plus, she enjoyed it and deep down she didn’t even want to give it up. She was definitely going to be brave and go back to the dentists in Harley Street to get veneers. She’d been for a consultation before Marbella last year, but bottled it because she was too afraid. This time though she was going to bite the bullet and get them done; she loved the perfect smiles they gave people and she decided she would look amazing with them.
Adele arrived at the studio an hour and a half later, extremely impressed. There were white gloss floorboards, skylights, a separate hair and make-up room and even a small kitchen.
‘Hi, I’m Hilary,’ the photographer introduced herself, rather snootily.
‘Adele.’
She guessed Hilary was in her late fifties. Her hair was short, blonde streaked with grey and she was wearing an electric-blue baggy blazer over a turquoise blouse, with draped pearls round her neck. Had this lady really photographed Madonna? She looked like an uptight grandma. Hilary appeared very serious and glanced over in a supercilious way, her face immobile.
‘Help yourself to tea or coffee. What exactly is it we’re shooting today? Swimwear garments did you say?’
‘Yes.’ Adele got the bikinis out and placed them on the white table to show her.
Hilary flicked a condescending glance over them. ‘Oh. Right.’
‘They look lovely on,’ Adele explained, wondering why on earth she gave a shit what this miserable old woman thought. She was paying her to take photos, not to turn her nose up!
‘Where is it that you said you were from again?’
‘Chigwell in Essex.’
‘Yes, I can see that now,’ Hilary replied disdainfully, staring into her eyes as though she was weighing her up. ‘I take it you won’t be modelling these bikinis?’ She looked horrified at the thought, making Adele want to slap her.
‘No,’ Adele gave a brittle laugh. ‘The model is stunning. She models for huge companies such as Ann Summers, thank you very much.’
‘I’m not too sure I know much about Ann Summers,’ Hilary replied, as though it was beneath her.
Of course you wouldn’t know much about Ann Summers, Adele mused callously, you probably haven’t had sex in decades! Who would want to do it with an old bat like her? She probably owned nothing but huge grey granny pants.
‘Where is this model you speak so highly of anyway?’ Hilary enquired, as Adele made herself a cup of coffee.
Good question, Adele thought, looking at the clock on the wall and noticing she was thirty minutes late.
‘I’m sure she’ll be here soon. There are problems with the tube,’ Adele fibbed. ‘I’ll just go outside and try her mobile.’
‘You’re more than welcome to try calling her in here. No need to go outside,’ the photographer answered suspiciously.
‘No signal,’ Adele replied with the fakest smile she could muster. What was this woman’s problem? She was paying her almost a thousand pounds for the shoot and still being spoken to like crap! If only she had time to use the same photographer as Jade and Kelly. It was too late now. This shoot had to be done today and she had to remember that this lady had shot Madonna. You literally couldn’t get any better than that.
As she dialled Skye’s number she felt a rush of adrenaline. Answer the phone you skinny cow!
‘Hello?’ Skye’s croaky voice crackled down the line. She’d clearly just woken up.
Adele bit back the urge to scream at her. ‘Skye, it’s Adele. Where the hell are you? I’m in Chelsea, waiting for you at the studio!’
She paused. ‘Oh fuck! I completely forgot. I only got in from my night out about an hour ago.’
‘I really don’t care, babe. You need to get here now. You agreed to do it and this is bloody unprofessional.’ Adele scowled.
‘Give me thirty minutes,’ Skye groaned.
Adele put the phone down, fuming. She was a professional model! How could she just forget a shoot she was booked for! If she didn’t turn up, she would seriously go mad at her. Even if she had to hunt her down, Adele wouldn’t be letting this go anytime soon. No one walked all over her and got away with it.
She walked back in the studio, not willing to take any more snooty remarks from grandma, and picked up a large folder on the table and flicked through it as she sipped her coffee. There were pages upon pages of landscape photography. Stunning sea views, country meadows, breath-taking mountains, lakes and forests. Then there were close-up still shots of an eagle, dandelion and an apple on a pine table.
‘I shot the sea views at Brighton would you believe,’ Hilary piped up from nowhere.
‘Oh really, that’s good,’ Adele replied, deadpan. She couldn’t even be bothered to pretend to be interested.
‘Stunningly beautiful day it was. Mid-eighties too.’
‘Mmm …’
She pulled another black folder out of her bag. ‘I have other landscape images if you’d like to look?’
Adele looked up at her, puzzled. ‘I’d rather see your shots of celebrities to be honest. Do you have the photo of Madonna here?’
Hilary looked incredulous. ‘Madonna? My dear, I don’t have a photo of Madonna.’
‘Oh,’ Adele said disappointed, ‘would she not let you keep it or something? I suppose celebs have to be careful in case you sell them on or whatever.’
Hilary’s face creased into a frown. ‘I’m afraid you’re mistaken. I’ve never shot Madonna in my life!’
Adele was confused. ‘But it says so on your website. Along with loads of other famous people.’
Hilary shook her head, raising her eyebrows. ‘I’m afraid you’ve got me muddled up. I’m Hilary Burton. I believe the photographer you’re referring to is Hilary Barton. We’re different people, with completely different styles. Unfortunately there isn’t much we can do about the fact that our names are so similar. Both our websites appear on Google when you search for either one of us.’
Adele wanted to scream. She’d looked up the first website, obviously the other Hilary’s, and then eaten her dinner having a think about it. When she searched again she went straight to the contact page, thinking it was the same website, and not checking. She was so stupid! Why hadn’t she checked? Just h
er luck the photographer she wanted had almost the exact stupid name as someone else! Someone completely annoying, who took photos of poxy apples!
Hilary hesitated. ‘I mean I can give the swimwear a go, but …’
‘Have you ever actually shot people before?’ Adele interrupted abruptly.
Hilary looked as though she didn’t want to answer, her face blank. At last she replied. ‘Well not exactly, no. Unless you include snapshots on my camera at Christmas?’ She laughed awkwardly, not realising that she was a giggle away from Adele running over and pushing her to the floor.
‘I cannot believe this is happening!’ Adele kneaded her eyes with her fists.
‘I did try to tell you on the phone that I only shot landscape, but you cut me off and hung up because you were late for your manicure. It’s too late to cancel I’m afraid. I’ll still need to be paid,’ Hilary said firmly, shooting her a threatening glare.
Adele was livid. ‘Oh don’t give yourself a heart failure; you’re still going to be paid, okay? I can’t cancel. I have to have these images done today. You’ll just have to do the best you can!’
Adele’s phone started ringing and she prayed it was Skye saying she was close by and needing directions. She frowned when she saw it was Chloe. What on earth did she want?
‘Chloe, I’m really busy. What’s up?’ she answered tersely.
‘Adele!’ Chloe squealed. ‘Guess what?’
‘Chloe, I seriously don’t have time for guessing games right now. Do you want to just spit it out please?’
‘The agency called. The model agency! They want to see me for an interview!’
Great, Adele thought, just as she believed her day couldn’t possibly get any worse.
*
‘God, I’m tired,’ Jade complained as she uploaded another bikini image to their website, which was hopefully going live within the next few days.
‘Not sleeping well or something?’ Kelly asked, concerned, sifting through the bags of crystals and picking some for the next bikini.
‘No, it’s just Lisa. She brings Cupcake round every day at seven in the morning. I then try to get back to sleep and just put the dog in bed with me, but she won’t keep still. Then she starts crying and I have no choice but to get up. I really thought one of the positive things about working from home would be not having to wake up too early.’
‘Mmm, I suppose that is annoying,’ Kelly agreed. ‘She’s the most adorable dog in the world, but she can be quite a handful I suppose.’
Right on cue Cupcake picked up some finished bikini bottoms in her little mouth and started chewing.
‘No!’ Jade said, exasperated. ‘Put those down now! You’re such a naughty dog!’
Cupcake growled and backed away, dropping the bottoms reluctantly. To Jade and Kelly’s disgust she then ran into the corner of the office, ignored the puppy pad and went to the toilet on the cream carpet.
Kelly looked at Jade with a stunned expression.
‘That’s it!’ Jade screamed hastily. ‘I’ve had enough! She hasn’t even been here a week and she’s driving me insane! It’s not fair on us and it’s not fair on her! Lisa is going to have to make other arrangements for this … this … monster dog!’
Kelly’s mouth was wide open. ‘Jade,’ she said in horror, rushing over and putting her hands over the tiny dog’s ears, ‘she’ll hear you! Dogs have feelings too, you know.’
‘I don’t care if she hears me! I want her to hear me. She thinks she’s so cute with her big puppy eyes and little wagging tail. She’s the most disobedient dog in the world. It’s like she purposely has it in for me! It’s not practical to have this dog while we’re working and that’s that.’
‘She’s just a puppy!’ Kelly defended. ‘She’ll learn about going to the toilet outside in the end. She’s bored. She just needs more toys.’
‘More toys? More toys? She has plenty of toys! Look at them! Scattered all round the office and making it look like a complete mess. But does she want to chew her bones? Oh no, they’re not good enough for Cupcake. No, Cupcake likes to chew the skirting, or the corners of the furniture or any bikini she can get her tiny paws on!’
‘Look, babe,’ Kelly said calmly, ‘I’ll clear up this mess and take Cupcake for a walk. I’ll look after her and I’ll tell Lisa to drop her to me in the mornings. From now on, I’ll be in charge of her. But, we can’t say we won’t look after her. Lisa would have to get rid of her and it would break her heart.’
Jade felt guilty. She didn’t hate the dog, not really. But she didn’t ask for her to come and disrupt their lives at work. She knew Kelly loved Cupcake to bits and obviously she didn’t want Lisa to have to get rid of her. But this wasn’t their problem. Lisa should never have got a dog when she worked full time. She didn’t want to be tidying up and worrying about a dog all day. It wasn’t fair on Cupcake either and Jade was adamant; Cupcake was going.
Jade took a deep breath and closed her eyes temporarily. ‘I’m sorry, Kelly, but she’s going to have to go. We’re busy all day and she’s making unnecessary work for us. You have to admit it. We can’t possibly keep her here.’
‘Well, I can’t tell Lisa. You’ll have to. Come on Cupcake,’ Kelly said, taking the dog outside.
Jade was stressed out. Pretty soon the website would be going live and they needed to send out a press release to hopefully get some publicity and media interest. All the media contacts they’d been given were in her red notebook, which was nowhere to be seen. She’d even texted Tony while he was holiday and asked him if she’d left it there. He didn’t think she had either. Then there was Sam. They’d been getting on amazingly lately, but he seemed paranoid and jumpy all the time. God only knew what was wrong with him, Jade sighed glumly. Jade just hoped it wasn’t anything serious.
*
Adele felt a huge weight lift from her shoulders as she heard a knock on the studio door.
‘At last she’s arrived,’ Hilary said raising her eyebrows. ‘Unfortunately due to my other commitments we only have a few hours left now.’
‘I’m aware of that, Hilary. You have told me about thirty times you know,’ Adele huffed, making her way over to the door.
‘Hi,’ Skye slurred when she opened the door, ‘sorry I’m late.’
Adele grimaced as the alcohol fumes hit her straight in the face. You’ve got to be joking, she thought, almost exploding in frustration. Adele glared at her venomously as she opened the door. ‘You’re drunk!’
Skye looked up at the ceiling. ‘I’m not drunk exactly, just had hardly any sleep. Chill out.’
Adele was so furious she couldn’t even respond to the ‘chill out’ comment. ‘Look, just hurry up and get ready, okay?’ She couldn’t believe the state of her. She looked nothing at all like her photos! Her skin was flaky, pale and dry. Skye’s hair was greasy and lank and Adele couldn’t take her eyes off the two great big spots on her forehead.
‘Where’s hair and make-up?’ Skye asked looking completely uninterested as she threw her cardigan on the floor.
Adele felt her blood beginning to boil. ‘What do you mean? I thought you’d be doing your own hair and make-up?’
Skye laughed derisively. ‘I can’t do hair and make-up for shit.’
Adele wanted to scream. This simply had to be the worst photo shoot of all time and to make matters worse Skye had already been paid up front. Now what was she going to do? ‘Oh for God’s sake. Come here. I’ll have to do it! But, I want a discount.’
‘No can do,’ Skye said, ready to leave. ‘I’m a little bit late I know, but I’m not working for any less. Take it or leave it.’
Adele considered her options for a moment. She would have happily modelled herself if she’d had a recent bikini wax. The thought of spider legs creeping out of the bikini bottoms made her quiver in shame. That was certainly not a good look! Besides, Skye knew what she was doing. She did it for a living, after all.
‘No, stay,’ Adele replied finally. ‘We don’t have long though
, so please take a seat and I’ll do your make-up quickly. Do you have any make-up with you by any chance?’
‘No. Can we smoke in here?’ Skye looked around, catching Hilary’s livid glare.
‘Under no circumstances,’ she replied, appalled at the suggestion.
‘Trust me, I’d have smoked a whole pack by now if we could,’ Adele muttered under her breath.
Luckily Adele had brought a few bits of make-up with her. She didn’t have foundation, but found an old cover-up stick at the bottom of her bag and she dashed it under Skye’s eyes to hide the dark shadows underneath them. She tried not to vomit as she rubbed the concealer into her spots. How could make-up artists touch other people’s zits without gagging? It was the most revolting thing she’d ever done so far in her life! She had some dark brown eye shadow, an old mascara and Vaseline. That was it. She still looked a complete state and there was nothing else Adele could do. Maybe the hair would make her look more like a glamorous model? She brushed it, parting it on the side, but with no straighteners or curlers it just hung there dismally, the thick grease impossible to disguise.
‘Look. This is a very important shoot, okay? You’re going to have to get some good images with how you look. Please,’ Adele pleaded.
‘Don’t worry,’ Skye grinned. ‘They’ll come out good.’
Adele felt a fraction more confident when Skye started to pose for Hilary. Her body was to die for, and the bikinis would have looked great if they could have blurred her face out. Oh well, Adele thought, maybe she could cut the head off some of the photos? Hilary was an expensive photographer and even though she only shot landscape, it couldn’t be that much different to actual people could it?
An hour and a half later, the day was over and Adele finally felt herself relax. She needed a large glass of wine after the day she’d had. Maybe she’d stop over at Lisa and Nicola’s? They’d moved in now, but she hadn’t had a chance to go over and see them yet. What was she going to do about Chloe too? She couldn’t believe the agency actually wanted to meet her! Jammy bitch! Trust Chloe to get spotted by someone. When was someone going to spot her? She had to put a stop to it. There must be a way. She couldn’t think of anything worse than Chloe rubbing it in her face she was going for this commercial or that photo shoot, expecting her to be pleased about it. The only thing she’d be pleased about was when this whole modelling thing was knocked on the head. Chloe wasn’t good enough! Surely the agency would see that? She was shy and pathetic; she didn’t have any qualities of a model. She would visit her on her way home and see how she could ruin her chances in some way.