Irene lowered the earpieces of her stethoscope. The few tubes and machines still hooked up to her this morning had been disconnected and stood sentinel-like against the wall should they be needed again. Cassie, with assistance from Angie, had redressed her in a pair of dark green lounge pajamas. She’d fluffed her hair, and added a little gloss to her chapped lips, too
Glancing at the stranger in the mirror, one she now recognized as herself, she was satisfied with the nurse’s efforts. This was as good as it would get for a while yet. She was still deathly pale, a few red scars vivid against the waxy skin, and the bags under her eyes testified to her weariness, but it would have to do.
“Your blood pressure and heart rate are up, but that’s to be expected. Everything else looks fine.” Dr. Marion smiled. “Your family’s in my office waiting to see you. Do you want them all to come in together, or would you rather see your daughter first?”
“I think I’d like a few minutes alone with Mandy.” She sighed deeply, not sure she was ready to meet her daughter, but desperately wanting to.
“That’s an excellent idea. She’s anxious to see her mommy again.”
Irene left the room, and Nikki prayed she was making the right choice by seeing her alone. She might not remember her daughter from the pictures, but somehow her maternal instincts to protect Mandy were strong.
Agent Spark had said she’d stoically endured that beating, making barely any sound so as not to wake her. If he was right and there was a super assassin after them still, she couldn’t let anything happen to her. Maybe seeing her daughter would trigger memories of her son, too. His life had been so short, his death so undeserved. The thought he hadn’t suffered brought some comfort, but the guilt from not recalling him ate at her gut once more.
The door opened slightly, and a pig-tailed blonde dressed in an orange turtleneck and brown corduroy jumper stuck her head in the crack.
“Mommy? Cassie says I can come in. Can I? I’ve waited a long, long time.”
“Of course,” she answered, her throat clogged with tears. The word Mommy struck a chord. Her brain might not remember, but her heart did, and that was a start.
Cassie opened the door wider and followed the child into the room. Mandy was tall for her age, all arms and legs. Her pigtails stuck out from each side of her head and were decorated with brown satin bows. She wore white knee socks and black leather shoes with satin rosettes on the toe. In her ears, she wore small gold studs. She carried a cloth bag with a felt pumpkin glued to it.
“I got to ride in a police car. They used the siren and everything. Lily went in her dad’s police car, but he said he couldn’t use the sirens. Then, we went in a hepacopter and flew over the mountains all the way here. It was fun.”
She stopped at the foot of the bed and stared.
Nikki held her breath. Would the child be able to accept her, or would she be disappointed, the way Nadia had been?
Mandy moved her head up and down as she scrutinized Nikki’s face, taking in all the details. Finally, she smiled, and Nikki felt a huge weight lift from her chest.
“I like your new face, Mommy.” She frowned and looked at the bed. “Why are you in a crib? Are they afraid you’ll fall out?”
The child’s logic made Nikki smile.
“I think I can fix that.” Cassie moved to the end of the bed and lowered it to regular bed level. “While your mommy was really sick, it was easier for me to take care of her up there.”
“Can you put the side down?”
“Sure can.”
Cassie lowered the rail, and the child immediately climbed up on the bed and nestled into Nikki’s right side.
“I missed you, Mommy.” Mandy cuddled closer. “When can we go home?”
“I don’t know, sweetie.” Nikki sighed. It was the truth. She had no idea how long it would take to catch The Butcher. “But we’re going to stay together from now on,” she stated with conviction. They could set up a cot in here for her until Nikki could leave the hospital, but she wouldn’t let anyone separate them.
The child clapped her hands. “You mean I don’t have to go back to the ranch?”
Nikki nodded.
“Yes! It’s nice there, but I’d rather stay with you. Will I be going back to school?”
“Not right away. Maybe I can teach you until you can go back.”
“That would be awesome. I really like making pictures like we used to do.” The child stared at the cast on her left hand. “Can you still draw?”
“I can. My drawing hand isn’t hurt, and the one in the cast is getting better all the time. Seeing you every day is exactly the kind of medicine I need to help me get better.” The child felt right cuddled against her, the heat of her small body familiar. She waited for Mandy to comment on her slower than normal speech, but she didn’t.
“Aunt Mitch said you almost went to Heaven. I’m glad you stayed with me even if you do have to have a different face because the other one got broken. I like your curly hair.” She moved away slightly and ran her hands through Nikki’s curls. She giggled. “Can we cut mine short like yours? I’ll bet it’ll be curly, too. You’ve been asleep such a long time. I was afraid you would miss Halloween. Do you know I can write my name all by myself now? I’m bigger. I made this for you.”
She held up the pumpkin bag.
Nikki swallowed the lump in her throat and smiled through the tears she couldn’t completely suppress. “Thank you. It’s beautiful.”
The girl’s face grew sad. “But I’m not a little sister anymore, and I won’t be a big sister. They put Kylie with Danny, so he could take care of her, and she wouldn’t be afraid.”
Nikki hugged her daughter to her. The thought that her two dead children were together was strangely comforting.
“Mandy, did your Aunt Mitch tell you that Mommy might have trouble remembering things? That I might not remember things about you, about our family?”
“Yup. She said your brain was hurt, too. She helped me make a list of all the things a mommy should know about her kid. The first thing is that I don’t like cooked cabbage. It’s stinky.”
Nikki laughed and kissed her daughter on the head, the gesture natural and comforting. “I don’t like it much either,” she confided and wondered if it were true. “What else is on that list?”
“Lots of stuff.” Mandy pulled a sheet of paper out of the pumpkin bag. “You’ll have to read it.”
“Let’s read it together.”
Some of the items brought back wisps of memories that quickly vanished before they could fully form. But it was obvious they’d been devoted to one another. What was most telling was the fact that, although Mandy mentioned Danny several times, she said very little about her father. Weren’t daddies and little girls supposed to be close? Although based on her childhood pictures, it didn’t appear as if Nikki had been close to her dad, either.
“Number twenty,” Nikki read. “Before you got sick and Daddy went to Heaven with Danny and Kylie, you promised me a new puppy. Joey’s parents probably gave my puppy to someone else. When you’re better we have to go pick out a new one.”
Nikki put down the list and pulled the child closer to her, dropping another light kiss on her head.
“I’m sorry about that, honey. I promise as soon as we are back in our own house, we’ll get a dog. I like dogs.” And she did.
“If you like dogs, Mommy, why wouldn’t Daddy let us have one?” Mandy’s voice was filled with regret as well as curiosity.
Nikki shook her head. Her husband didn’t sound like much of a dad. What man in his right mind could refuse this beautiful child something as simple as a puppy?
Mandy turned her face up to look at her. “Where are we going to live, Mommy? I liked our house. I miss Lily. She was my bestest friend.”
“If you want to go back to our house, that’s okay with me.”
She vaguely remembered Larosa was situated near a manmade lake. She concentrated on the idea of living near the water and re
alized she’d enjoy that. Agent Spark had mentioned his brother was the sheriff there, but she wasn’t sure whether that would be a problem or not. It wasn’t as if the agent lived there, too.
“But we can’t go back to our old house,” Mandy wailed, drawing Nikki’s attention back to her. “Grandpa is selling it. He said we can’t go back there, ever, but I want to.” Her bottom lip stuck out and trembled slightly.
What right did her father have selling her home without discussing it with her? What had happened there had been a terrible episode in their lives, but so far she didn’t remember any of it, and Agent Spark had assured her Mandy hadn’t seen a thing. Going back to the house, back to what were sure to be familiar items, might trigger her memory. It was worth a try. A chill went through her as she tried to imagine what her last few minutes in the house might have been like.
She didn’t want to remember her beating or probably her husband, but she’d like to regain her memories of Danny. The few things Mandy had said pointed to a shy, sensitive boy. Mandy had mentioned Daddy was always angry with Danny for one reason or another. Why hadn’t Nikki stood up for her son? Had she been a wimp? An emotionally abused wife? Well, if she had been, she wasn’t anybody’s pawn anymore.
The door opened to admit Dr. Marion, Nadia, and a tall, bald man she realized was her father. He was older than he was in the photograph. She disliked him just as much in person, more so now that she knew he was riding roughshod over her life.
“I see you and Mandy are getting along well. Are you ready for the rest of your family?” Irene asked.
She wasn’t and would have preferred more time with Mandy, but she knew she’d have to face the man sooner or later. Putting it off for an extra fifteen or twenty minutes wouldn’t help, and she wanted to talk to him about the house. Nikki nodded.
Her mother, dressed in a deep blue shantung suit that surely was tailor-made for her, was strangely subdued; in fact, judging by the glazed look in her eyes, Nikki could swear she was sedated. A momentary pang of guilt rose in her, but what could she do? Saying, hello, nice to see you again, but unfortunately I don’t remember you at all, wouldn’t help the situation much.
Thomas Lincoln was a tall man, broad shouldered with none of the stoop one might associate with a man in his mid to late sixties. His bald head glowed as if it had been spit-polished, while his furrowed eyebrows were thick and dark above the wire-framed glasses over his cold, watery blue eyes. His classic aquiline nose dominated his clean-shaven cheeks, with a Kirk Douglas dimple in his chin. His thin lips were pursed, he was furious. Agent Spark had mentioned her father was opposed to his plan to relocate her. No doubt that’s what had annoyed him.
Thomas wore a black shirt that strained slightly over his pot belly, gray pants, and black loafers. A gold signet ring decorated his right hand and an intricately carved wedding band his left. Exuding power and confidence, he was the type of person who issued orders, not requests. Whatever father-daughter relationship had existed between them was gone. She could no more accept dictatorial orders from a man like him than she could remember her past, even though she was certain this interview wasn’t going to please him one bit. The angry look on his face bothered her most. Shouldn’t a father seeing his daughter awake for the first time in weeks be happy about it? A shiver coursed down her spine. She imagined a man similar to this had ordered their deaths.
Dr. Marion moved to the door. “I have other patients to see, so I’ll leave you to get reacquainted with your family.” She left the room.
“Mommy,” Mandy said, assuming the duties of a hostess introducing the guests to one another. “This is Grandma and Grandpa. You used to call them Mother and Father. Daddy and Grandpa didn’t like one another,” she whispered loudly the way five-year-olds did. “They used to yell all the time. After we moved, Daddy got mad when we went to see them.”
The look of displeasure on her father’s face made Nikki chuckle.
She didn’t like either of them, especially her father and the way he was glaring at her child. Nikki hugged her daughter and pulled her closer. Before she could say anything to Mandy, her father interrupted.
“Mind your mouth, missy. Your father was too outspoken for his own good. Look where it got him.” He focused his eyes on Nikki, dismissing the child at her side. “Your husband called us Nadia and Tom. Since we’re apparently strangers to you now, you can, too.”
Did he think she was faking the amnesia?
“I’m sorry that I don’t have any memory of my life before I woke up here. Thank you for understanding.” Her voice dripped with sarcasm and his eyes narrowed.
Better to set things straight right away. Forcing a calmness she didn’t feel into her voice, she smiled.
“Mandy tells me you’re selling our home. Don’t you think that’s a tad premature? We’ll need somewhere to live when I leave the hospital.”
Her father’s face reddened. Did he have blood pressure issues? Anyone that bellicose probably did. She was about to speak again when Mandy piped up.
“Grandma, do you like Mommy’s new face? She looks different, but it’s really her. She’s got her same eyes and she kisses the same. She doesn’t remember a lot about me, but I know she loves me.”
Nikki’s throat filled with emotion, and she smiled tenderly at the child beside her.
“Yes, I guess she does,” her mother answered, and Nikki could sense her discomfort. Something wasn’t right. “The doctors did an excellent job, darling.”
Her mother’s voice sounded tired, as if speaking was a chore. Just how many tranquilizers had she taken?
“I’m pleased to see you awake, Nicole. You do look noticeably different, but considering the extent of the damage, it was to be expected. For a while, we didn’t think you’d make it.”
Her father’s voice was deep and gruff, and goose bumps crawled along her spine. He didn’t sound in the least bit sincere.
“As far as the house in Larosa goes, of course I’m selling it. No sense hanging on to a useless piece of real estate. When you’re well enough to resume your maternal duties, you and Mandy will move into the house in San Francisco where you belong. We’ll have the nursery redone—make it into a private apartment if you like, with an art studio so you can paint. Your mother and I have discussed this matter thoroughly and agreed that it’s the only solution.”
Nikki’s heart pounded in her chest as anger suffused her. For Mandy’s sake, she fought to control her newly discovered temper. This man might be her father, but she didn’t like his attitude, and she wasn’t going to take it.
“Well, you haven’t discussed it with me,” she stated, more loudly than she’d intended.
Mandy flinched.
That small action was all Nikki needed to control her temper.
“You and Nadia may think this is the only solution, Tom, but I don’t. Mandy and I will live on our own as soon as it’s feasible to do so.” If she used the word father, she’d choke on it. “I know my health is precarious at the moment, and apparently there’s a madman after us, but that doesn’t affect my future plans. As for the house in Larosa, please take it off the market. If you’ve removed any of my possessions, have them returned. I have no intention of moving into your home. I’m quite capable of looking after and supporting myself and my daughter. I understand I have a trust fund, the income from my artwork, and any insurance Sam may have had.”
A muscle jumped in his jaw, reminding her of the one in Agent Spark’s face, and she swallowed. This similarity between the two men was unnerving.
“You aren’t thinking straight. Look at yourself, for God’s sake. Your voice may sound the same, but your speech is slow and, with the memory loss, I doubt you’re even competent. No court would give you custody of the child on your own. Isn’t the death of my grandson enough to make you realize you’re incapable of making wise decisions?”
Her father’s cruel words pierced her, but instead of beating her down as he must have expected, they strengthened her resol
ve. Nikki used the feel of her daughter to keep her temper from getting the better of her. She tried to slow her heartbeat and calm her breathing, but it was impossible.
“According to the psychiatrist, my brain is fine. I’m as sane as the next person. I don’t know what my life was like before, and I don’t know what kind of person I was, but I know who I am now. I won’t be bullied by you or anyone else into doing something I don’t want to do. When this is over, I will manage my own affairs and live where I damn well choose. I hope for Mandy’s sake that we can all be friends, but if not, it’ll be your loss, not mine.”
“Nicole!” Her mother sounded scandalized. “You can’t talk to your father that way.”
“I prefer the name Nikki. I can, Mother, and I just did. No one is going to boss me around again. Now, I’m tired, and I’d like you both to leave. Mandy and I wish to be alone.”
“Nicole, you can’t be serious. You can’t expect to keep the child with you.”
“I most certainly do.”
Her father’s face got redder, and if she’d been drawing a caricature of him, she’d have added steam coming out his ears. She captured his eyes and indicated Mandy with hers.
“Obviously you’re not yourself. You’re letting that incompetent FBI agent fill your mind with crazy notions. You’re all off in la-la land making mountains out of molehills. None of you seem capable of looking at the facts. The persons who attacked and killed your husband and son were nothing more than two-bit druggies, and your FBI agent and his Interpol friend are whistling into the wind believing this is some great Mafia vendetta. It’s bullshit, plain and simple. They broke into the clinic for drugs, got high, tortured Sam for the combination, and stole whatever money and drugs he kept at home. This idiotic plan of his to hide you away has disaster written all over it.”
Nikki hadn’t asked Agent Spark where he’d planned to take her if she agreed to go, but right now, she’d rather follow a man she wasn’t sure of than one she didn’t trust at all.
“Sam was irresponsible for taking you and the children out of San Francisco, and all of this is his fault. There’s no conspiracy, no foreign killer. There is an inadequate FBI agent trying to make up for the fact that he can’t find those responsible for this. I assume you’re going to go through with his cockamamie plan. If you feel you must leave here for whatever reason, why not come home or go to a private clinic? I’m quite capable of hiring a private duty nurse to look after you. Mandy can return to the ranch. No one has gone near her since she’s been there.”
On His Watch (Vengeance Is Mine Book 1) Page 12