Nikla stopped talking when she heard her mother laughing.
She glared at her. “What’s so funny?”
“My baby girl is still my little girl. After all this time, you still need me to help you with boy troubles.” Her mother stood from her chair and embraced Nikla, who openly sobbed.
Her mother allowed her to cry for a while. Nikla’s father would have never allowed her to be that vulnerable.
“I’m so sorry that I thought so many bad things about you.” Nikla hiccupped as she talked to her mother.
“Don’t. The whole reason I left after you kids left the house was so that you didn’t hate your father. He was raised a certain way. He’s a hard man. In certain aspects of my life, I liked that. But I also needed a man who could understand me and all of my frailties.”
Nikla had that in Sweet. Until her mother verbalized it did she realize that Sweet had not only changed her, but he had accepted her.
“So have you found someone?” Nikla asked.
Nicole shook her head. “I date here and there. I’m content being single for now.” She pointed at Nikla. “But you, you’re in love. I can tell. A man who makes you cry is the one you truly love.”
Nikla smiled. “He’s so dynamic. He’s not afraid of anything. He’s seen me at my worst and still wanted me. He’s sacrificed a lot for me.”
“So why are you here instead of being with him?”
“I have had so many bad relationships. I thought if I talked to you, I could understand myself better.”
“So you came home to get an understanding of yourself. Yep, I’d say you’re my daughter for sure.”
Nikla had to smile at that assessment. Years ago, hell, just yesterday, she wouldn’t have had that same reaction.
“Are you going back home tonight?” Nicole asked.
“If it’s okay, I’d like to hang around for a couple of days to get to know you. I’ll get a hotel room nearby and–”
“Nonsense. You’ll stay right here with me. I have the room. It’ll be wonderful to have my child under my roof again.” She framed Nikla’s face and kissed her forehead.
Getting to know her mother would be a bonus. She wouldn’t have to know that Nikla also needed a place to hide out from Sweet’s prying eyes. She knew she would have to go home eventually. Right now, she needed this time for herself.
****
Three days had passed and Sweet hadn’t seen or heard from Nikla. He’d spent his days camping out at her job just in case she felt “better” before the week ended, and his nights watching her apartment. Tonight wouldn’t be any different.
He could hear his brother in his head telling him to give Nikla her space. Masaun would tell him that if Nikla truly wanted him, that she would come to him. Sweet didn’t have that kind of time or patience.
Sweet paid no attention to his brother’s advice. He went to Nikla’s apartment. This time he found her vehicle outside. His heart started up as soon as he saw her gray sedan.
Sweet knocked on her door and waited a moment. When she didn’t answer right away, he raised his fist again to knock. This time the door opened.
Nikla’s face looked lifeless. Had he done that to her? Had being with him drained her of her power, her strength, her life? Ignoring the doubting voice in his head, Sweet pursued her.
Even in her oversized, loose-fitting t-shirt and baggy sweatpants he found her sexy. She had her hair in a bun at the top of her head.
“We need to talk.” Sweet braced his hands on the doorframe.
“I think we’ve said enough to each other.” Nikla wouldn’t look him in his eyes.
That wouldn’t stop him. Sweet pushed his way into her apartment and closed the door behind him.
“Please leave.” Nikla put her hand to his chest.
The singular connection ignited the smoldering fire within him. He’d longed for her touch. Even angry, he would take her any and all of her attention.
“No. You’ve controlled what’s happened between us for the last few days when you avoided my calls. Now you’re going to hear me out.” Sweet pinned her against the wall as she continued to press her hands against his chest. “I need you back in my life. Out of everything that’s happened to me over the last week, you’re the only thing that makes sense. I need for you to come with me to my place and–”
“No.” She shook her head.
“What?”
“What? Would rather hear ‘red’? Fine. Red.”
Sweet pressed his body against hers. “Tell me you don’t miss me.” He brushed his lips against hers and immediately heard her breath catch. “Tell me you don’t miss this.” Sweet kissed her lightly at first, simply sweeping his lips against hers before he fully captured her mouth.
Sweet tasted her familiar honeyed flavor on her lips. He put his hands on her waist and moved them down to her ass. As soon as he gripped it, she snapped back to the situation.
“No, stop!” Nikla broke from the kiss. She managed to duck under his arms and move away from him. “You come in here and tell me what you want and need. ‘I need you to do this’ and ‘I need you to do that.’ What about what I need?”
Sweet remained quiet as she spoke.
“I need to be with a man who’s not going to question my ethics. I need to be with someone who supports me. I need to be with someone who listens to me. I don’t think you’re that person.” She went to the door and opened it.
“I’m not going.”
“Fine. I’ll call the police. You haven’t asked me where I’ve been or what I was doing. I realize you’re a Dominant and all of the focus should be on you, but I’m a person, too. I have a voice, and I want to be heard.”
Damn. Sweet could hear his brother saying “I told you so” in his head.
“Okay, where were you these last few days? What’s been going on while I’ve been worried about you, calling you day and night?” Sweet crossed his arms over his chest.
Nikla shook her head. “Goodbye, Sweet.” She made sure to keep her face turned away from him as she held the door open.
Damn it. Sweet didn’t want to go. After the turmoil he’d been through over the past week, he wanted to stay there with Nikla and fight the good fight. Couldn’t she see that they needed to be together? Couldn’t she tell that he’d been hurting without her? From just looking at her, he saw her pain. He also recognized that him standing there, saying the wrong things, doing the wrong things, gave her more anguish than he wanted.
Finally taking his brother’s suggestion, he walked to the door. He stopped at it long enough to snake his hand around her waist and pull her close to him.
Sweet kissed the side of her face. “I’m not perfect. I’ll give you your space, but just know I still want you. I’ll never stop trying to win you back.” He took a deep breath before he said what he really wanted to tell her. “I love you.” Sweet reached the door, but before he crossed the threshold, he stopped. He turned back to her. “Blue.”
Nikla stared at him for a moment. “What?”
“You said if I was ever in trouble to use my safe word.”
A look of recognition crossed her face. Nikla dropped her gaze to the floor.
Without another word, Sweet retreated, feeling like a failure.
How could he gain her trust again when she could barely look at him?
Chapter Thirty-One
After a quick shower and a restless night, Nikla changed into her normal yoga pants, sports bra top with a wraparound sweater, and some sneakers. She arrived at work early, hoping not to find Sweet waiting for her in the parking lot.
Work would be the only thing to occupy her mind right now. If she called in sick and sat at home alone with her thoughts, she would be driven crazy thinking about Sweet, his business and what could have been.
It still surprised her that Sweet had shown up to her apartment. It shocked her even more that she had the strength to refuse him although seeing him again, kissing him, and having him touch her brought her body back t
o some wonderful memories.
Then he said he loved her. Did he mean it? Had he only said it out desperation?
He’d even used his special safe word. For that, Nikla had almost accepted him back into her life.
As soon as he left, she’d gone to her freezer for that damn Snickers bar. One look at it, she knew taking even one bite wouldn’t have solved her problems. She did something she should have done years ago: threw that damn candy bar in the trash.
Nikla did her classes that day in a fog, something some of her students noticed.
“Are you okay?” Ashley asked after her class. “You seemed a bit out of it.”
Nikla sighed as she gathered the supplies. “I am, but I’ll be okay.”
At the doorway to the workout room, Karen opened the door for Ashley.
“Oh hey, Nikki, uh, Nikla.” Karen tucked her hair behind her ear. “Can I talk to you?”
Nikla looked up and saw Big Tom walking behind Karen. He glanced at her and nodded his head.
“Whatever you have to ask, you can do it here.” Nikla secured her workout bag on her shoulder.
“Okay. I really need someone to cover my spinning class tonight. Can I count on you?” She chewed on her lower lip.
Nikla sighed. Honestly she had nothing else to do. “Sure.” She felt so defeated.
Karen squealed and attempted to throw her arms around Nikla. Nikla held up her hand to stop the enthusiastic woman.
“I’m going out to lunch.” Nikla walked by Karen and stared at Big Tom. “If that’s okay.”
Big Tom said nothing as she continued walking.
As usual, Nikla and Deana went to the same place for lunch. Nikla got her standard salad bar salad and stared at it as it sat on the table. She picked at it with her fork but couldn’t eat any of it. Why did she even bother going out to lunch?
Nikla stared at a crouton on her salad. She picked it up and placed on the back of her hand. Like the jellybeans Sweet had put down her arms the very first time they played in his store, she focused on the feeling of that rye-bread crouton on her hand.
She closed her eyes and thought about every bump and grit over the crouton. Nikla concentrated on the connection to her skin. To her, the cube felt like a million pounds and would keep her in her spot. Coupled with the fact that she still wore her candy bracelet, Nikla knew Sweet still had her under his spell.
“Are you listening to me?” Deana asked, snapping Nikla out of her thoughts.
“No. I’m thinking about something else,” Nikla answered honestly while still keeping the crouton on her hand.
“What? Your business?” The snarky way Deana said it bristled Nikla.
“Yes. You know, you’ve never been really supportive of me trying to open this studio. What’s up with that?” Nikla dropped her fork on her plate.
“I have been. Are you kidding? I’m always talking about my smart, ambitious friend, Nikla Dearwood, who’s trying to do her own thing.”
Nikla wanted to believe that. Considering Deana had never lied to her, and Deana always spoke what was on her mind, she had no reason to doubt her.
“As a matter of fact, I saw that lying, cheating dog, Justin, a couple of weeks ago and I told him that you were going to have your own business and would crush him and his rich-ass family.”
Nikla broke her stare from the food on the back of her hand to look at her friend. She could only imagine Deana yelling at Justin, who probably crumpled into a ball until she finished her speech.
“I even told him that you had met some hot-ass guy with a huge dick.”
Nikla shook her head. “Deana.”
Deana nodded. “I sure did. I said that you are getting it on the regular now.”
Was getting it, Nikla wanted to add. Even though she didn’t want to admit it to him, Nikla did miss Sweet. She glanced down at her wrist and noticed her candy bracelet. Damn. She pulled her sweater down to cover it.
“Yep, I even told that idiot that your man owns his own business and that he laid it down behind closed doors.” Deana cackled, but Nikla realized what she’d just said.
“You told Justin that Sweet and I had sex in his business?” Nikla asked.
“Yeah. You should have seen his eyes. They got so wide. That’ll teach him.”
“I wished you hadn’t done that.” Nikla brushed the crouton off the back of her hand, then stopped their waitress to ask for her check.
“Why? He was a horrible boyfriend and a lousy lay. I let him off easy.”
“He went to the health department and told them what we did. Decadent Treats is in trouble now. Sweet and his brother talked about closing.”
Masaun hadn’t been wrong when he blamed Nikla. If she hadn’t told her friend what she and Sweet had done, she wouldn’t have blabbed it to Justin. She just never figured Justin to be vindictive considering he cheated on her.
“I’m so sorry, girl. I didn’t know the jerk would have–”
Nikla paid for her lunch. “What I tell you is between me and you. If you can’t respect that then maybe we shouldn’t be friends.” She stood up. “You think about that. I sure will.”
As she went to her car, Nikla felt like she had a purpose. She had to apologize to Sweet and Masaun, but didn’t know how to do that. She’d kicked him out of her place. If he didn’t listen to her then, he wouldn’t do it now.
****
Sweet sat behind the desk at Decadent Treats making calls and handling some business. When Masaun came into the room, Sweet didn’t move.
“You haven’t done enough?” Masaun put his fists to his hips.
Sweet pointed to the couch, the place he normally occupied. “Have a seat. Let’s talk.”
“Do you have pants on now? Have you already had sex on the couch?” Masaun goaded.
“Don’t be a dick. I’m trying to talk to you here.” Sweet pushed himself back from the desk.
Masaun plopped down. “Fine. I’m sitting. What?”
Sweet took a deep breath before speaking. “I’m signing over my half of the business to you.”
Masaun’s face went pale as he stared at his brother. “What are you talking about?”
“I fucked up. I’m admitting it.” Sweet shrugged. “You’re right. I get impulsive and I look for the immediate reaction. I did it at The Dollhouse. I tried doing that with Nikla. I did it here. My head isn’t into business. Nikla called me selfish. She was right.”
Everything about her was right. In the couple of weeks he’d been without her, his body ached for her. Kissing and touching her the other night whetted his appetite, but he wanted more.
Masaun leaned forward and braced his elbows on his knees. “Look, we can fix this. Between me and Kindle, we can work something out with the health department. There’s got to be something for first-time offenders.”
Sweet shook his head. “Handled. I contacted the agent on the form. I told him effective immediately I would be stepping down as candy maker, and only after a thorough investigation would we be allowed to reopen the kitchen. I have a name of a great pastry chef who can make you some incredible candies once the health department gives you the okay.” Sweet stood from behind the desk. He handed his brother a piece of paper with the name of the pastry chef he’d met at The Dollhouse. “The other stipulation is that I would step down as owner. I did the offense so I need to get away from the business.”
Masaun jumped up. “No. This was your idea. This is your baby.”
Sweet chuckled. “If this was a real baby, I would have been arrested and put behind bars for neglect. You know the true ins and outs of this place. I’m just a distraction.”
“But you love cooking and baking. What are you going to do?”
Sweet smiled. “You were right about something when you talked about me disciplining submissives. My heart wasn’t into it. I had lost my passion. I’m still passionate about food. But I love something else more.”
“BDSM?”
“Nikla.” Just saying her name started his hear
t.
Masaun nodded.
Sweet moved around the desk. “I’m moving out, too.”
His brother shook his head. “You don’t have to leave.”
Sweet laughed. “You weren’t singing that tune weeks ago. Besides, if I stay here I’ll get depressed thinking about what could have been downstairs.”
“You can move in with me until you find a place.”
Sweet shook his head. “You and Kindle need your privacy.”
“We have extra bedrooms in our house.”
Sweet cocked his head. “So I go from one apartment over the store to crashing with my big brother. I’m not a flunky college grad. I’ve saved some money. I’ve made some calls on some prospects. I’ll be okay.” He approached his brother. “I know I’ve made things very hard on you in life since I was kid. I’m so sorry. I will spend a lifetime making it up to you.”
Masaun shook his head. “No, don’t...”
“You need to stop feeling like you have to save me. Let me fail.” He patted Masaun on his shoulder. “Trust me. It’s made me stronger.”
“What are we going to tell Connie and Hanson?”
“Tell them they’ll have one less hard ass yelling at them.” Sweet headed to the door. Before going back up to his apartment to pack up his items he turned back to Masaun, who looked defeated. “Are we good?”
Masaun ran his fingers through his hair. “Getting there.” He grinned. “Hey, the least I can do then is to throw you a good-bye party. We can do it here after work on Friday.”
“No, you don’t have to do that.”
“Kindle will kill me if I don’t. Nothing special. Just the co-workers and us wishing you well.”
“Okay.” Sweet grabbed a couple of large shipping boxes and went upstairs to his apartment. With losing the business, he hadn’t expected to feel renewed. The whole situation gave him clarity. He still had to figure out how to get Nikla back. He’d hurt her by accusing her of reporting them to the health department.
Licorice Whips Page 33