by Jenika Snow
“No, I will come over and make sure my best friend is okay.”
Tristan breathed out, but before she could respond, Kash came in with a tray in hand. He set it on her bed and she looked at the bottle of aspirin, the tall glass of water, and the two pieces of unbuttered toast that sat atop it. She couldn’t help the way her heart skipped a beat. Here was this incredibly frightening man that towered over her and filled the entire room, bringing her food and trying to make her feel better.
“Tristan? Did you hear me? I’m going to come over later.”
“Okay, I’ll see you then.” She ended the call and smiled. “Thank you so much, for everything.”
He ran his hand over the back of his neck, and she wondered if she had embarrassed him. It seemed hard to believe that a man like Kash could be embarrassed. He turned to leave and her heart pounded.
“Wait.” He turned and looked at her. “Will you sit with me for a little while?” He didn’t respond and she felt herself grow nervous. “Please.” The idea of being alone, even though it was daylight and she was in her own home, scared her. She didn’t know why, but the thought of having him near calmed her immeasurably.
He didn’t say anything, just turned and walked back toward her. When he sat on the bed it dipped and she leaned forward slightly. She ate her toast and drank her water in silence, but the fact that he was there was all she needed. It was like whatever had happened last night sealed something in her. She couldn’t speak for him, but she was thankful he had come into her life.
“Are you feeling any better?”
She finished her water and nodded. “A little. When the painkillers kick in I’m sure I’ll feel a lot better.” He nodded in affirmation and turned to look out the window. She studied his profile. His facial hair was starting to grow in, nothing much, just a dark shadow that told her he hadn’t shaved today. He was completely masculine in every way, so much so that Tristan felt heat rise inside of her just from staring at him. Did he have this effect on every woman he came across? She wouldn’t doubt it. When he faced her again she couldn’t help but be taken aback by the color of his eyes. They were so green and bright they seemed to pierce the very depth of her body.
“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to thank you for what you did last night. You saving me from—” She shook her head and looked down at her comforter. “Thank you again.” When he didn’t say anything she glanced up at him.
“You don’t have to thank me, Tristan.”
Hearing him say her name was like a punch in the stomach. Her heart thundered and her blood raced. He watched her closely, like he knew what she was thinking even before she said it.
“You shouldn’t put yourself in a situation like that. There are a lot of guys out there that won’t stop when you say no.” He took her hand in his and she could feel the heat right to her bones. “They will see how beautiful you are and won’t stop until they get what they want.”
Beautiful? He thinks I’m beautiful?
Her cheeks had to be on fire, because they sure as hell felt like it. She cleared her throat and looked down again, not able to hold his stare. She had never been good with compliments. He squeezed her hand and she forced herself to bring her head up.
“I guess I was lucky you didn’t have to work last night.” She laughed, trying to change the subject because she suddenly felt uncomfortable. She didn’t mention that Kylie had said he would be at the party but she hadn’t seen him. It was a good thing anyway, because if he had been at the party he wouldn’t have been at her house saving her.
“What do you do anyway, if you don’t mind me asking?”
He let go of her hand and cleared his throat. “I—” He stopped talking and brought his eyes back to hers. “I don’t want to lie to you, so I’m just not going to answer that right now.”
Okay.
He stood and made his way to the door, stopping only to glance over his shoulder and smile at her. “Get some rest.” He turned and was gone and Tristan was left sitting on her bed, pondering what the hell just happened.
Chapter Six
A few weeks after “the incident,” Tristan was starting to feel better about everything that had happened. She wouldn’t say she was completely healed, but she knew she was slowly getting there. When she wasn’t at work and Kash wasn’t MIA, doing whatever his secret job was in the middle of the night, they would watch TV together. It wasn’t the most spectacular thing to do, but Tristan found herself looking forward to it every week. It had become a weekly tradition. She found, through that one day a week of watching movies with him, that she had labeled Kash before she had truly known him. Yes, he was a badass, and yes, he could probably kill someone with just his bare hands, but he was also insightful, kind, generous, and had the same raunchy sense of humor as she did.
There was a connection between them. At least she felt a connection. Kash was too independent, too silent, and too hard to have to rely on anyone, like she did. Aside from Kylie and Jayson, Tristan didn’t hang out or talk to other people. So the fact that Kash was here, willing to spend time with her, even if he was silent a lot of it, made her grateful.
“You want a beer?” Tristan called out to the living room as she opened the fridge.
“Yeah, please,” Kash called back from the living room.
Tonight was their weekly movie night. Tristan had the beer and the snacks in hand as she made her way back out to the living room.
“Scary or funny?”
She didn’t have to think about it long. “Scary, definitely.” Horror movies were always her favorite, and although she freaked out every time, was afraid of the dark, and swore she heard something in her closet after watching them, she couldn’t stop. She was a glutton for fear.
Kash put the DVD in and turned around with a big smile on his face. “Good, because I just got this new one and it is gonna be good.” He sat beside her on the couch, grabbed a beer, and popped the cap.
Tristan grabbed the blanket that was over the back of the couch and covered herself with it. When she saw the opening scene she rolled her eyes and looked at Kash who wore a big grin. “Really?” The soft porn scene before her was poorly shot. The two unsuspecting soon-to-be victims rubbed on each other in the middle of the woods.
“What?” His eyebrows were raised in mock disbelief.
“I should have known you would pick something cheesy like this.” The murderer came charging through the woods just as the couple reached climax. He brought his knife down, killed both of them gruesomely, and disappeared in the woods again.
“What a way to go. Killed right as you come.”
Tristan choked on her drink and Kash reached behind her to pat her on the back. “You have such a way with words.” She wheezed the sentence out as she tried and failed to hold in her laughter.
He put his arm over the couch, right behind her, which made her acutely aware of how close he really was. They sat in silence for the rest of the god-awful movie, and when the last scene played, Tristan rolled her eyes again. Of course the two lone survivors felt the need to have sex to celebrate the fact they hadn’t been killed. Instead of getting as far away from the murderer and the woods as they could, they thought fucking in an abandoned cabin was safe enough.
As their clothes started to slowly come off, Tristan became more aware of Kash sitting beside her. She could see him out of her peripheral vision, and she wondered if the scene, cheesy as it may be, was having the same effect on him as it was on her. First there was kissing, then there was panting, and soon their sweaty bodies were rocking together. These types of movies had never had a sexual effect on her before, but being this close to Kash, smelling his incredible cologne, feeling his body heat surround her, she found herself turned on beyond belief.
Just one look, that was all she wanted. She turned her head just slightly, just enough to see if that stoic, hard mask on his face had faltered. He wasn’t watching the screen. No, he was staring right at her. He seemed unaffected, as usual. While s
he was breathing heavier, and her pulse was beating harder, he just sat there looking at her.
Her lips felt too dry and she licked them as the sound of the couple having sex seemed to be amplified in the room. Kash’s gaze dipped down to her mouth and her breathing stalled. Was this really happening? Were they having a moment? This was wrong, wrong on so many levels. She would not, could not do this again. He was her roommate, for fuck’s sake. Look at how that turned out last time. Kash was so much different than Zac, though. For one thing he wasn’t a douche bag. For another, Tristan felt this pull toward him. With Zac it had been all about sex. They didn’t have movie night once a week and they certainly didn’t joke around. Kash and she were able to talk, or they could sit next to each other and say nothing at all, but it was comfortable, not forced.
The longer they stared at each other, the more Tristan’s blood raced. Hands in tight fists, she forced herself to turn away from his intense stare. Nothing good could come out of this, nothing. A bond had been built between them, and it was growing into something meaningful. She wouldn’t risk losing that for one night of sex, especially since she knew her feelings would only get in the way.
He hadn’t spoken so she sneaked a glance at him from under her eyelashes. His focus was on the screen again, but his jaw was tense. He may appear to look unaffected, but he had felt the same heat that she had. He was just smart enough not to act on it. The movie ended and she pushed the blanket off her legs. Now was a good time to call it a night, while she still had her dignity and hadn’t fucked everything up.
“Thanks for the cheesy movie, Kash, but I’m heading to bed.” She looked over her shoulder and feigned indifference. He watched her, a mask covering his features. Her breath stalled at the pure animalistic magnetism that his one look held. Holy fucking shit, did this man know what kind of effect he had on her? She lifted her hand, like a blundering fool, and all but raced up the stairs. Yeah, she needed to get her shit together because things could go downhill really fast.
Chapter Seven
Two months, fifteen days, and six hours. That was how long it had been since Tristan had forced herself to turn away from Kash’s heated stare. She had thought the time would have lessened the need for him, but it only made it worse. Every day, every hour, and every minute she tried to stop the feelings that were slowly growing inside of her. It was no use. Kash, on the other hand, treated her like a little sister, a pal from down the street. She knew, without a doubt, that what she had thought was desire reflected in his eyes that night had only been sympathy. Yeah, he had probably seen how much she wanted him, like a damn cat in heat, and didn’t know how to let her down easy. A man like Kash certainly didn’t want a woman like her. Even she could admit how mousy and frumpy she was, especially with the attire she wore around the house.
She looked down at what she was wearing. Yup, frumpy as hell. Tristan picked at the too-big sweatpants and oversized tee she wore. It was Thursday, their movie night, but Kash had been gone all day. He hadn’t called, but she wasn’t his keeper and shouldn’t have expected him to call her. Maybe he forgot? That thought had her slumping down the couch and stuffing another chip in her mouth. Every freaking week she looked forward to these movie nights, and as much as she tried to keep it platonic, it was no use. Oh, she could play it off like she felt nothing for him, the same as he acted toward her, but deep down she pined, hard.
A look at the clock showed midnight. Nope, he wasn’t coming. He probably got called in to work, whatever the hell that was. She could go to bed and mope over the fact she hadn’t gotten those two hours of bliss sitting next to him and becoming intoxicated in his scent, or she could put on a comedy and hopefully forget for a little while. The movie won, although she knew there would be no forgetting. Hell, she could smell his cologne on the couch pillows. She pushed play but soon found her eyes growing heavy.
The sound of the door opening and shutting woke Tristan. She hadn’t known she fell asleep, but the TV screen was black and the clock read three in the morning. She rubbed her eyes and pulled herself off the couch. The kitchen light clicked on and she looked over her shoulder. She couldn’t see Kash, but she could hear the fridge open, bottles being clanked together, and a cap being popped.
Tristan pulled herself from the couch and walked into the kitchen. Kash had his back to her. Even half asleep she could appreciate the view. He wore a white T-shirt that was molded to his body. Every part of him was visible through that shirt, especially the tattoo that covered his flesh. He tipped his head back and drank half the beer in one swallow.
“You missed movie night.” It was only meant to tease, but when she saw him stiffen in response she wondered if she should have kept her mouth shut. He didn’t respond for so long that Tristan started to feel uncomfortable. Just as she was about to turn and go to bed his gruff voice stopped her.
“I’m sorry about that, I really am. Something came up.” He didn’t turn around when he spoke and Tristan had a suspicion that something was wrong.
“Is everything okay, Kash?”
“Yeah, just go to bed, Tristan. I’ll see you in the morning.”
Maybe she should have listened to him, but there was a part of her, a part that she tried to suppress, a part that was starting to care for him more than she should, that wanted to comfort him. He sounded forlorn, troubled, and distant. She took several steps into the kitchen.
“Go to bed, Tristan.”
She lifted her hand and placed it on his shoulder, willing him without words to turn and look at her. “Talk to me, Kash. Tell me what’s wrong.” His body was hard beneath her hand, the heat from his flesh searing her right to the bone. “I’ll listen to whatever you have to say.” He turned around and she stumbled back in shock at his appearance.
Chapter Eight
Blood, a lot of it, covered Kash’s shirt. When she regained her senses she searched his face, looking for the wounds that could have caused so much blood. The only thing she saw was a slightly swollen and red spot below his eye. He brought the beer bottle to his lips and her gaze was locked on his knuckles, knuckles that were red, battered, and starting to scab over.
When she was able to bring her eyes back to his he was watching her intently. She wanted to ask what happened, but nothing came out. He downed the rest of his beer and set it on the counter. He opened the fridge and got another out. When her initial shock wore off, she blinked several times and cleared her throat.
“Oh my God. What the hell happened? Are you okay?” She lifted her hand again, but he took a step back, out of her reach. He didn’t respond and she dropped her hand.
“You should have just gone to bed, Tristan. I didn’t want you to see me like this.” He finished his second beer and threw the bottle away before turning and leaving her in the kitchen alone, stunned. A few moments later she heard the shower turn on.
* * * *
Kash slammed his fist into the tile of the shower repeatedly as the image of Tristan seeing him covered in blood flooded his mind. Damnit! She should have been in bed. He shouldn’t have been so foolish as to not clean up before he came home, but he hadn’t been thinking. The adrenaline and high of receiving and delivering pain had made his mind fuzzy. He had been high off of it. Any other time he had come home she was always in bed. Hell, he had even forgotten about their movie tonight. He felt like a bastard, a selfish fucking bastard.
The water slid down his body, washing away the sweat and blood that covered him. This was his life, and he had brought Tristan into it. She had seen him covered in another man’s blood, and she had feared him. Feared him! Oh, at first she had been so worried, thinking all the blood had come from him, but then she had realized it wasn’t his, and all that worry had evaporated. He couldn’t explain it to her, couldn’t tell her he would never hurt her because if she knew who he truly was, what he actually did for a living, she would really fear him.
He quickly washed the rest of his body, needing to go to bed and forget about everything that had just
happened. Maybe he should leave? Maybe fleeing like a coward was the better option. Even thinking this, knowing this was the best thing for both of them, he couldn’t. He had feelings for Tristan, ones that were far stronger with each passing day. Just thinking about her, with her soft voice, smooth lips, and supple body, had his cock standing hard instantly. Yeah, he was a sick and selfish bastard.
He shut the shower off, a little more forcefully than necessary, and grabbed a towel. When the terrycloth was secured around his waist he lifted his hand and ran it over the mirror, smearing the condensation off. The man that stared back at him was not the man he wanted to be, but there was no way to change that. He wanted to be so much more for her. He wanted to be decent and good, give her everything that she deserved. Hanging his head in frustration, he breathed out. He knew what he had to do, knew he would need to make her see who he really was, what a motherfucker he could be. It pained him to even think about doing it, but if she hated him it would be better than seeing her desire for him.
* * * *
Oh God, who have I let in my home? He had looked raw and fierce, like some kind of warrior. She had no clue why that image had formed in her mind, but something primal and animalistic had come off of him. He was dangerous. That much was true. His green eyes had been blazing, and although she knew he could have hurt her, added her blood to his shirt, she knew without a doubt he would never lay a hand on her. She wanted to talk to him, find out what had happened, but she had sensed he needed his space. She was not about to tease the lion.
After she turned everything off and made her way upstairs, her mind was still reeling. The shower had since turned off, and right before she made it to her bedroom the bathroom door opened. The light was already off and steam and heat billowed out of the small confines. She stood there, not able to move as she stared at Kash. Despite the fact there were no lights on, the moon shone through the window, making his appearance as clear as day. Her heart raced at the sight.