“You shouldn’t.” I swallowed the impulse to tell her I knew that whatever she thought she could get from us wouldn’t happen, that she would lose in this game. Maybe my silence was because I wanted this fantasy to continue for as long as possible.
I wanted to hear from her lips why she thought I was good. Why I made her life better. It had been a long time since any woman ever thought that about me, and I certainly hadn’t made it easy on any of them.
Until Avery.
“But I do.” Her eyes fastened on mine, and I saw a swirl of emotion direct the words she was about to say. “Since my dad’s murder, I’ve been lost. I refused to listen to what I wanted to do with my life, and instead, I did what made logical sense, what he would have wanted me to do, or so I thought. It wasn’t until you that I realized what my biggest problem has been all these years.”
“What was it?” I asked, feeling my throat clench. This couldn’t be faked, could it? These emotions running over her and through me?
“I’ve been numb. I’ve been completely numb to my emotions, life, and certainly relationships.” She shook her head. “You’ve reminded me what’s it’s like to feel again, and I like it. I like being with you.”
I shook my head and closed my eyes, letting her words sink into me. I wanted this to be real so badly it hurt. I’d spent my entire life being the guy everyone was scared of. The impulsive brother, the person you didn’t want to owe money to, the guy who’d beat you to a pulp for looking at him the wrong way. I drank myself into stupors and lost more money than people made in a lifetime, but recently, that had changed. First, I wanted to be better for myself, and then I met Avery, and I wanted to stay better for her.
I opened my eyes and leaned in, pressing my lips to hers. I didn’t kiss her. I just felt the connection I’d been feeling from the first moment I ever saw her.
“You okay?” she asked, nipping my bottom lip in a way that made my entire body tighten.
I pulled back and held her hand. “You’ve reminded me why I want to remember life.”
She gave me a puzzled look, but I continued.
“I used to drink too much because I wanted to forget what I’d done the day before, let alone that night. With you, I want to remember every moment we share. I want to memorize every giggle, sigh, and wry comment you toss my way, even if it's just handing me something from the printer.”
She smiled, keeping her gaze on me while I continued.
“I don’t want to forget anything about you. I don’t want to forget my life. I want to remember it because you’re part of it.”
Her breath caught and tears shone through her gaze.
I wanted to believe they were real.
“That’s the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me.” She touched my cheek and brought her lips to mine before pulling away. “We’ve both been running from things we can’t change, and yet here we are, together.” Avery let out a deep sigh. “You never wanted to remember life and I just didn’t want to feel it. The greatest gift you could have ever given me is what you’ve already handed me. If things ever change between us, I want you to always remember how you changed my life. How you made me hold onto every emotion that zips through my veins. You’ve given me a future that is much brighter than before.”
I didn’t know if she had any idea what her confession did to me, but I refused to believe this was part of her plan. I wanted to believe she meant those words, at least for a few more days. I could buy us that much time before our worlds came crashing down.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Avery
The warm breeze cascaded over my skin as I walked around the expansive terrace overlooking the Atlantic Ocean. The terrace alone was twice the size of any apartment I’d lived in. Devin was inside taking a call while I enjoyed the view from his family’s condominium. I ran my hands through my hair and closed my eyes, wishing that I’d never taken this assignment.
But if I’d never been assigned, I wouldn’t have experienced everything I had with Devin. I wasn’t lying when I told him that he’d made me feel again.
In fact, I felt so much emotion that every thought I had made me ache for a life that wasn’t possible. My heart literally hurt when I thought about misleading him, leaving him, hurting him . . . but our lives had already sent us in two opposite directions.
It didn’t matter that the longer I was with Devin, the more I understood why they did what they did, but that didn’t change that they broke the law while doing it.
A tremor ran through me as I thought about my father’s killer and Jenn’s. The Volkovs had solved the problem, took care of it how only they could, and I’d benefited each time. Simple black and white options did not categorize life. There was this center area where the real world lived, where some got hurt by others’ decisions while others excelled.
But it didn’t matter. This wasn’t real, and all I could do was try to survive and start over somewhere, someday. What was worrisome was that I no longer knew where I fit in. I didn’t believe the man the Volkovs killed had worked alone, and the more I analyzed it, the more I thought it could be Ellis calling the shots, especially with Ashley showing up. Ellis seemed to be the one constant, whereas Davis often slipped in and out. I wasn’t sure I’d ever figure it out, and maybe soon, it wouldn’t matter. City living no longer intrigued me and I desperately wanted to go back to the place I grew up.
For many reasons.
I started this assignment certain of so many things in life. Wicked people existed, and my job was to put them away. Simple as that.
But life wasn’t that simple.
I understood that now.
I turned around and saw Devin slide his phone on the table and walk toward the hallway that led to the bedrooms. My chest tightened, and I let out a deep breath. I was going to follow his advice about our time on Miami Beach, and I was going to enjoy him.
I slid the glass door open and walked into the air-conditioned condo. Everything in the condo was sleek. The snow-white, polished marble covered the entire kitchen, draping over the island, the backsplash and the counters. I glanced at the glass dining table and saw a text blink across Devin’s screen and I froze.
She’s completely clean. Shipments came and went without a problem. Thought you’d want to know.
I drew in a shaky breath and heard Devin making his way back down the hall.
“Did I hear you come back in?” Devin asked, turning the corner and grinning as he took me in.
I quickly stepped away from the table, hoping the screen on his phone would turn off, and pretended to care about a bizarre sculpture on the bar.
He looked incredibly sexy having just changed into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I rarely saw him in anything other than a suit. It looked good on him, like he could finally relax.
“Tired of the suit and tie?” I raised my brows and he laughed.
“More than you know.” He slowly strolled over to me, his eyes moving along my body, sending me into a chaotic frenzy of emotion. Maybe feeling wasn’t a gift.
He pulled me into him and ran his lips across my neck.
“Why is your pulse racing?” he whispered.
“I guess you just know how to turn me on.”
He laughed, scooping me deeper into his arms.
“A friend picked something up for me that I’ve been wanting to give you. It’s not really something that’s easily shipped.” He kissed me. “But once he leaves, I’m going to kiss every square inch of your body and take—”
The door knocked and I stifled a groan.
“I wanted to hear the next thing I could look forward to.” I wiggled my brows as he slowly let go and shook his head.
“Guess you’ll have to wait and see,” he said over his shoulder as he opened the door.
The man stepped in, and I immediately recognized him from the bakery Devin had taken me to.
George. His name was George. I held in my surprise. Was this the same George that Ellis wanted me to lo
ok into?
Obviously.
“Hey, George.” Devin pulled him in for a quick hug. He was far more relaxed meeting him now than at the bakery.
Away from the bakery, George looked imposing.
Frightening, actually.
His buzz cut showed off the size of his mammoth neck that seemed to be the same size as his head. I could see this being the man who cleans up after the Volkovs. It wouldn’t take him long.
He handed Devin a rectangular box and looked over Devin’s shoulder, his gaze connecting with mine.
“Aren’t you the baker?” I asked, my brows pinching together. “George, right?”
“Good memory.” He smiled. “And the answer to that is complicated.”
“Isn’t it always?” Devin laughed, nodded, and slapped his shoulder. “Would you like to come in for a drink?”
“Nah. I’ve got a date.” George glanced at me and an unexpected sense of calm settled around us. “You take care, boss. Call if you need anything.”
Devin nodded and waited for George to turn around before he closed the door.
“So he lives in Miami, yet flies up to the city to bake goods for the needy?” I crossed my arms.
“Not exactly.” He was clutching the box when he noticed his phone light up on the table. He walked over and slid it on, reading the text message and rolling his eyes.
“What’s up?” I asked, sliding my hands along the fabric of my dress.
“My brothers just being idiots. Nothing new.” He slid his phone in his jeans pocket and gestured for me to take a seat at the table.
“So, what’s up?”
“This might seem like a strange gift, and it probably is, but . . .” He pushed it across the glass, and I realized it wasn’t a typical box. It was a lockbox. “The combo is the day we met.”
“You remember it?”
“I live by it.” His eyes darkened, and I punched in the six-digit combination.
I opened the box and my jaw dropped in surprise.
“A Colt .45?” I stared in awe at the engraved pistol with gold accents and mother-of-pearl grips. It was the most beautiful weapon I’d ever seen, and the engraving alone would have cost thousands.
“You said the one thing we could get you—”
“Was a Colt .45,” I interrupted. “This is beautiful.”
“Question is, do you really know how to operate it?” A glint of satisfaction flashed through his eyes. He already knew the answer, and it had nothing to do with where I was from.
“I’m from Idaho, remember?” Tension filled the room as I brought my gaze slowly to his.
“There’s a holster underneath the padding.”
My phone rang and I nearly jumped out of my skin. Now that Jenn was gone, the only people who had the number were the Volkovs, Davis, and Ellis.
“Need to answer that?”
I nodded and got up slowly, making my way to my purse, where I dug out my phone.
It was Davis. I swallowed an ache and answered my cell with a quick hello.
“You need to get out of Miami immediately.”
I glanced at Devin. His eyes stayed on me as I stayed rooted in place, answering her.
“I’m sorry. I don’t really think that’s possible. I know there was more than enough money in my account,” I told her.
She let out a deep sigh.
“Ellis is dead. He was gunned down at some drycleaners.”
My blood chilled as terror ran through me. Devin knew who I was.
“You need to get out of there. Now. Don’t be fooled into believing these men have a soul.”
“Everything okay?” Devin asked, standing up, his eyes connecting with mine.
“Yeah. Just some bank issue.” I turned my attention back to the conversation.
“I’ll do my best, but I’m not in the state at the moment,” I told her.
Her voice hardened as she continued.
“There’s a plane ticket with your name on it at Miami International. Flight leaves at eleven tonight.”
Devin walked over to me and slid the phone out of my hand before turning it off. If Ellis was dead and Davis is warning me, did that mean it has been Devin this entire time?
A shiver ran through me and Devin ran his hands along my arms.
“Do you need me to straighten anything out?” Devin asked.
“No. I can handle it later. Just some bank mishap.” My voice cracked and Devin smiled, leading me back to the table.
“You haven’t asked us for anything.” Devin sat me back down in front of the pistol. “And everyone does. Always has, but that’s just how I grew up. I always expected that someone was after something we had until I met you, Avery.”
I wedged my trembling hands under my thighs. George was probably right outside the door.
Waiting.
“It’s not your fault. We make our living staying one step ahead.” He sat next to me. “Staying out of trouble means more to us than you can imagine.”
I nodded slowly, bringing my eyes back to the pistol.
“Go ahead, pick it up. Turn it over.”
I slid my hands out from under me and picked up the pistol, checking to see the empty chamber, and turned it over. The engraving was even more elaborate as the gold and silver wrapped around an emblem that meant only one thing.
The thin blue line.
My hands trembled as I set the pistol back down with the two black fields with a thin blue line between shining up at me. Avery was inscribed beneath.
“I figured I’d stick to your last name.”
“My last name?” I asked, looking up at him.
“Lara Avery.” He took a deep breath as his eyes fastened onto mine. “That’s your name, right? Not Avery Hill.” He leaned back and stretched.
“Correct.” I straightened in my seat.
“How do you think I found who killed your father? I had to know his last name, your last name, to find the man.”
I forced down tears that suddenly surfaced.
“I don’t envy your job. It’s far more difficult than mine. You protect society from good and evil, chaos, disorder.” He cleared his throat. “People like me.”
“You’re not—”
He held up his hand to cut me off. “I know what I am.”
“And so do I.” My pulse hammered through my chest. “You’re a good person.”
“Who happens to do bad things?”
“Not that I’ve seen.”
Devin smiled and shook his head. “I wish it were that easy.”
“So do I.”
Devin stood, and my heart leapt from my chest. He wandered over to a painting that he quickly moved aside to reveal a safe loaded with cash.
“There is no way out for you.” He turned around and slid his hands into his pockets. “It’s only a matter of time before my brothers figure it out, realize who you are. It won’t matter where you go or who you pretend to be, but I can prolong your life. I just can’t guarantee it.” A hollow sadness dripped from his words. “You can’t go back to the department. No one will believe you.”
“So it was you who killed Jenn?”
Horror ran across Devin’s face. “No. It wasn’t me or my family, if that’s where your mind went. We took care of the man who murdered her.”
I wanted to believe him.
“What about Agent Archer and Agent Ellis?” I had nothing to lose. Maybe I’d at least go to the grave knowing something, which was better than where I stood now.
Devin shook his head. “Don’t know who they are.”
“They’re both dead. Ellis said you or your men killed Agent Archer, and as of today, Agent Ellis is now dead.”
“Wish I could help you, Avery. I really do.” He glanced at the safe. “But that’s all I can give you.”
“I don’t want anything from you.”
“But that’s not the case at all, is it?” Disappointment filled his gaze.
“How long have you known?”
He
breathed a big sigh. “A long time, but I didn’t care. I wanted to live in some fantasy where you’d see my side of things and magically drift over to my world.”
“Who says I can’t?” I kept my voice steady, standing up.
“You can’t imagine what you do to me,” Devin whispered, circling me. There was something different in his eyes, but he didn’t scare me.
Not now.
“Everything I told you on the plane was true,” I whispered as his gaze stayed on me. “You’ve made me come alive again.”
“But it wasn’t enough.”
“That’s not true.”
“It is.” He let out a groan and took a couple of steps back. “Even now, for instance, you’re wearing a wire.”
“No, I’m not.” I shook my head in confusion.
“Why start lying now?” Devin asked, his brows furrowing. “We were getting so far.”
“Devin, I’m not lying to you. I’m really not wearing a wire.”
“The problem with lying to a Volkov is that we always find out the truth. It’s some weird inherited gift.”
“I’m not wearing one, Devin.”
He slid his phone out of his pocket and slid his finger along the screen. He tapped on an app and tossed the phone on the glass table as my words from seconds before echoed into the room.
My heart stopped.
“Dry cleaning. I picked up dry cleaning from Ellis.”
“I know.”
My gaze shot to his.
“I saw the receipt you supposedly dropped that night the guy shoved it into your hands. I knew you never dropped it.”
Without letting the words settle, I ran toward the bedroom and began tearing through my clothes, searching for any sign.
Devin came up behind me and ran his fingers along my bare shoulders until his fingers found the tag, tugging on it but leaving it in place.
I stood, shaking my head in disbelief, but the moment I worked my fingers behind me and felt the tag, I realized what he was taking about.
“Right here. You’re wired.”
The dress I had put on when I arrived in Miami.
“We specialize in security of all types.”
My eyelids slammed shut with regret. I didn’t want to hear what he was going to say next.
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