by Kat Mizera
He answered on the first ring. “What happened?”
“He’d packed up and left when I got back to the villa.”
“Coward,” he muttered.
“I don’t get it,” she said, walking through the hallway towards the lobby. “I just can’t picture that kind of thing coming out of his mouth.”
“So you looked it up?”
“Yeah.”
“To be honest, I feel the same way.”
“Jamie, do you know exactly what he said?”
“Yeah.”
“Tell me.”
“Why?”
“I need to know. When I talk to him, or see him, I have to have all the information.”
“He was yelling at Barkonov and said…a cock-sucking bastard like him needed the same beatdown Jamie Teller got.”
She inhaled sharply, tightness filling her chest. “I don’t believe it!” she whispered.
“It’s hard for me to listen to as well.” He paused. “What are you going to do? Are you going to stay until Saturday?”
“I think I am,” she said softly. “He paid for the villa, and frankly, swimming in the ocean is novel for me. Besides, I’m dealing with a lot of emotions right now and being here allows me—”
“Madison Teller!”
“Maddie, how does your brother feel that you’re dating Hawk Hawkins?”
“Is Hawk still here, Maddie? Is he going to make a statement?”
Maddie couldn’t move as reporters surrounded her, throwing out questions faster than she could process them. She was frozen in place and it wasn’t until she heard Jamie yelling through the phone that she realized what was happening.
“Maddie! Do you hear me? Is that the press? Say ‘no comment’! Listen to me, is there security nearby? Maddie!”
“N-no comment.” She wasn’t sure anyone heard her because they were still firing questions at her as she tried to get past them.
“Maddie, don’t hang up, just keep walking.” Jamie sounded a little frantic.
She wasn’t sure where to go and she looked around, desperate for an escape.
“Maddie!”
“I’m here,” she whispered, fighting off tears. “I can’t… I don’t…”
“I’ve got the resort on Viggo’s phone—they’re aware of the problem and they’re sending security. Breathe, honey, it’s going to be okay.”
She saw hotel security coming and froze, taking a shaky breath as they pulled her from the melee and guided her into a back hallway. Someone took the phone from her hand and reassured Jamie while someone else handed her a bottle of water and offered her a chair. She sank into it and burst into tears.
Chapter 9
Hawk walked through the gate at the airport in Ottawa with his baseball cap low on his forehead, shades on and head down. He felt like the worst kind of punk. He’d walked away from the best thing that had ever happened to him—leaving her with nothing but a stupid note. He was a jerk and a coward and had no idea what he was going to do to make this right. Giving up Culkin wasn’t an option, but he owed his fans, his friends and his career some type of explanation. He hadn’t said the words, but everyone thought he had and if he wasn’t going to tell the truth about what had happened, he still had to get in front of it. This wasn’t going away—he’d realized that when he got online and saw the media storm still raging—but he wasn’t giving up hockey without a fight.
He’d just gotten in his car when his phone rang. He looked down and froze, his chest constricting painfully as he read the name of the caller: Jamie Teller. He’d forgotten he had Jamie’s number in his contacts. It rang a few times and he started to wonder if Maddie was okay. Jamie had probably heard about what he’d allegedly said minutes after he said it; if he was mad about that, he would’ve called sooner, so it had to be about something else.
Unable to help himself, he put it in the hands-free unit and took the call on speakerphone. “Is Maddie okay?”
“No, she’s not!” Jamie yelled. “Do you know what’s happening over at the resort right now?” He didn’t wait for Hawk to respond. “The press saw you two together and cornered her in the lobby! What the hell were you thinking, leaving her there alone?! I’m not pissed about what you said about me or even that you broke her heart, but I’m seriously considering getting on a plane to Ottawa and knocking the shit out of you for what’s going on now!”
“I don’t… What?!” Hawk’s brain finally kicked into gear as he realized what Jamie was saying. The press had seen them together and found her at the resort? And he was a thousand miles away. He couldn’t believe this was happening. Not to her. Not to his sweet, innocent Maddie, who hadn’t had anything to do with what he’d gotten himself into.
“You heard me,” Jamie growled. “How could you leave her like that?! You couldn’t just put her on the plane on Saturday like you were supposed to?”
“I had no idea they saw us! Dammit!” Hawk slammed his hand on the steering wheel. “Is she okay? Did security take care of it? Where is she?”
“Physically she’s fine. They got her out of there pretty quick and removed the reporters from the premises. I spoke to the head of security down there and he’s putting Maddie in one of their private houses or something, until she can get on a flight out. She should be okay until then, but now everyone knows who she is and where she lives. There’s every chance they’re scanning flights and will be waiting for her when she lands.”
“I’m sorry,” Hawk sighed into the phone. “I never meant to involve her… I didn’t know who she was until we got to the resort and she told them her name. There weren’t any other rooms available and I couldn’t let her go back to that piss-ant motel, so I just kept her with me and then I fell—” He stopped abruptly. He was rambling, trying to explain how he’d screwed over the sister of the man he’d supposedly said horrible things about.
“And you fell?” Jamie prompted quietly.
“It doesn’t matter. I apologize for what’s happening to Maddie. I can call over there, make sure she’s okay…”
“Not necessary, I’ve taken care of it.”
Hawk hesitated. What was he supposed to do now?
“So that’s it? You’ve got nothing else to say to me?”
“I have a lot I’d like to say to you, but it’s not going to change anything, so what’s the point?”
“The point? The point is that you’ve been sleeping with my sister and you left her in the middle of a media circus that she’s spectacularly unprepared to handle! After my attack, the press hounded her daily to get information about me! She and my mom had to sneak in and out of the hospital to see me because the press was there day and night. Then this summer it started all over again during the trial of my attackers! She’s been having nightmares, she doesn’t go out much anymore, she’s lost weight—all because of me. And now, not only did you bring that whole nightmare back to light with your incredibly thoughtless comment on the ice, you dragged her right smack into the middle of it!”
“I didn’t know she was your sister!” Hawk growled on a ragged breath. “You and I are friends! I would never have done that to you or to her!”
“I thought we were friends,” Jamie corrected mildly. “But we obviously have different definitions of that word.”
“What did she say?” Hawk asked quietly, ignoring Jamie’s dig.
“What?”
“I’m sure you told her what I did—I need to know what she said. How angry she was. I need to hear it.”
Jamie huffed out something that sounded like a cross between a laugh and a grunt. “She said she didn’t believe it.”
“What?” Hawk’s stomach clenched so painfully he nearly gasped.
“I said, she didn’t believe it. I think her exact words were something like, ‘I can’t imagine those words coming out of his mouth.’ So my sister, whom you threw to the wolves, is still holding out hope that you’re not the homophobic prick the hockey world says you are.”
Hawk couldn’t answ
er because he was too choked up to breathe, much less talk. “I’m sorry,” he rasped. “Tell her I’m sorry—tell her…I’m still hers.” He disconnected and pulled off the road, onto the shoulder. He put his silver SUV in park and rested his forehead on the steering wheel. She didn’t believe it. His beautiful, sweet sea nymph knew him better than he even knew himself; she’d seen and heard all the evidence and still didn’t believe it. God, he loved her. Three freakin’ days together and he was head over heels gone for a woman who was probably very hurt and confused right now. She didn’t hate him, though. That was the first ray of hope he’d had since the incident and he clung to it. He didn’t have a plan, but he was going to make one.
The nightmare woke Maddie out of a restless sleep and she sat straight up in bed, her heart hammering in her chest, breaking out in a cold sweat. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to drown out the images of her brother’s broken, bloody body, but they were so vivid, the sound of him calling to her for help so real, she knew she’d never go back to sleep.
She slid out of bed and padded over to the window. It was early but the sun would be coming up soon. She made a cup of coffee and took it back to the window, sinking into the chair beneath it. The small house the resort had moved her to was pleasant and quiet, close to the security offices and not available to regular guests. She’d been promised no one would bother her, and they hadn’t. She’d spent the rest of yesterday sitting in front of the TV, mindlessly watching shows she’d already seen and didn’t care about. Someone had been thoughtful enough to bring her dinner, but she hadn’t been able to eat, merely picking at a roll until her stomach churned.
She was hungry now, though, and despite everything happening, she’d come too far to spiral again. She had to eat, had to take care of herself, had to keep moving forward. She’d be okay once she got home, but right now she felt like a prisoner. She couldn’t fathom the idea of going back to work in three days, but what choice did she have? She had bills to pay and a life to continue. It wasn’t the most exciting life, but it was hers and it could be a lot worse. She’d only miss Garrett for a little while; she’d be okay without him. After all, it had only been three days. Three wonderful, romantic, passionate days where she’d gotten more from him emotionally than she’d gotten from every other guy she’d ever dated put together.
She walked out the front door, coffee in hand, and stared out at the small, private street. One of the guys was just getting to work at the security office a few doors down and he waved. Maddie waved back, melancholy washing over her like a wet blanket. She didn’t have it in her to run today, but one of the security guys had offered to go with her if she wanted to swim one last time. She was grateful for Clay; he’d done so much to help her get through yesterday. He’d thoughtfully refrained from mentioning Garrett and had kept her surrounded by resort employees who seemed to go out of their way to make her feel better. The people here were nice. If she ever had the money, she would definitely come back to Barefoot Bay and this wonderful resort.
Her phone buzzed in her pocket and she pulled it out warily. A text from Jamie:
Just getting home from the club and it takes me a little while to wind down. If you want to talk, I’ll be up for about an hour. Xoxo
She smiled and texted back:
I’m okay, thanks. I’ll call you from the airport tomorrow. Xoxo
Walking back inside, she rinsed her cup in the sink and pulled a carton of yogurt out of the refrigerator. This place was much smaller than the villa, but equally well-appointed. They’d moved everything for her, including the yogurt and fruit in the refrigerator, but she found she had no appetite. She was holding it together for now, but she had a feeling she was going to break down soon.
When her phone started to ring, she let out a sigh of annoyance. She glanced down expecting to see Jamie’s name but it was an unknown number. She frowned, worried it was the press, but also thinking it might be the local number to the airlines or the travel agent Jamie had used to change her ticket. If it was the press, she could hang up. She reluctantly hit the button to answer it.
Hawk debated calling her a hundred times. He needed to, needed to explain what had really happened. Even if they couldn’t be together, the idea that she’d believed in him, and was questioning everything she’d heard about him, made him love her that much more. He needed to make it right with her, even if it didn’t change anything for them. Her faith in him moved him in ways he didn’t understand, driving him to make the call.
Her cautious greeting on the other end nearly made him cry with relief. “Hello?”
“Hi, baby.” His voice was gruff, unsure whether or not she would hang up.
“You probably shouldn’t call me that anymore,” she whispered sadly.
“I know, but I wanted to talk to you, to say I’m sorry. I really am. I just… I needed you to know that if I’d known who you were when we first met, I never would have…”
“Never would have what? Saved my life? You’d have let me get shot by those gang guys?”
“Never.” His voice cracked a little. “I’d never let anything happen to you.”
“You left me here alone, dealing with your mess.”
“I know. I had no idea we’d been seen. No one ever pays attention to me when I’m in Mimosa. I don’t know why…” His voice trailed off. “Shit. My stepfather.”
“Your stepfather?”
“It’s a long story, but he’s been mad ever since I joined the NHL instead of going to college. I told you I went to my parents’ house when I first got down there. Instead of support, I got a huge I-told-you-so, telling me what a horrible human being I am and how this never would have happened if I’d gone to college and joined the family business. I walked out and he was still yelling about how ungrateful I am… I guess this was his revenge, telling the press where I was.”
“Why would he do that?”
“Like I said, he’s pissed that he took me under his wing and taught me everything he knows about cars—which is a lot, I have to say—and I thumbed my nose at him to play hockey.”
“You can’t play hockey forever… Couldn’t you invest in his business and then join him when you retire?”
He chuckled, loving that even in the middle of this crisis they thought alike. “Yeah, I tried to tell him that but I gave him a check for $25,000 a couple years ago and he tore it up. Said he’d rather go bankrupt than take money from me.”
“I’m sorry, Garrett.”
“We got off track here—this phone call isn’t about me. I wanted to make sure you were okay...clear up a few things.”
“Like?”
“This doesn’t change anything—we still can’t be together—but I couldn’t stand the thought of you believing I was capable of saying something so ugly.”
“I don’t know your side of the story.”
“I know.”
“Well, are you going to tell me?”
He didn’t say anything, merely waited as she grappled with his silence.
“Is this really too much to ask?! After all you’ve put me through, you can’t even be honest with me?!”
“I am,” he whispered, willing her to understand, to know his heart as well as he thought she did. He couldn’t spell it out; she needed to know instinctively that he was innocent.
“Garrett?” She sounded miserable, her voice quavering a little.
“Honey. Listen to what I’m saying. Please.”
She was silent now too, the only sound coming from her strained breathing. “You haven’t said anything… Wait, are you trying to tell me that you actually didn’t…say anything?”
He closed his eyes, so much emotion coursing through him he wasn’t sure he could speak. Not only did she know his heart, she trusted him. She’d basically been presented with proof of his guilt and she’d still questioned it. She had his back more than even his parents did, and that meant everything to him.
“I don’t understand! The linesman said he heard you, that’s why
you got such a harsh suspension and fine, because it was right in front of him… Garrett, explain this! Please.”
“It wasn’t me who said it.”
“It was that guy next to you—I saw the video—what’s his name?! Cucumber?”
He snorted. “Culkin. Roger Culkin.”
“Then why are you taking the blame?” she demanded. “Why are you letting this moron get off scot-free while you’re in trouble?!”
He blew out a breath. “It’s really complicated. The dynamic in the locker room is based on trust. If I give him up, no one will ever trust me. You don’t do that to a teammate. You just—ask your brother. Ask him about that. And tell him I’m sorry, that I’d never, ever say something so hateful. I have nothing but respect for him and Viggo, and I hope he understands why I have to keep quiet.”
“Garrett!” Her voice broke as fresh tears were unleashed in a torrent of sobs that had her crying so hard she couldn’t speak.
“Aw, baby, don’t…” He spoke gently, his voice as filled with pain as hers. “Please don’t cry. I just needed you to know—I had to make sure you knew I’m not that kind of man, that I care about your brother, that he really was my friend… Please don’t cry.”
“I need you!” she sobbed. “I need you here—I can’t do this by myself, facing the press, hounding me at work, my apartment… I can’t! I had another nightmare last night and I’m so nauseous I can’t eat and I. NEED. YOU!” By the end she was shouting through her tears, hiccupping.
“Shh.” His dropped his voice a couple of octaves, hoping it soothed her frayed nerves. “You’re okay. I’m going to take care of it and I’ll make sure the press leaves you alone. I can’t come back to Mimosa right now, but—”
“You have to! Dammit, I said I need you!”
“Honey…”
“Are you mine, Garrett?”
“Always.”
“Am I yours?”
“You know you are.”
“Is there a really obnoxious bruise on your right shoulder?”