Rule number one from my shrink is that I try my best to always be honest about my feelings. With her, my friends, and most importantly, with Aiden. So I take a deep breath, and look him in the eye as I tell him the truth. “First, I was thinking about how I want you naked so I can run my hands and mouth all over your gorgeous body.”
“And then?” he asks, not seeming to be affected by what I just told him. At all.
I’m really hoping it’s because he’s got the best poker face I know, and not because he isn’t interested. “Then, I was thinking about how happy I was going to be with you next to me all night.”
“You didn’t look happy there for a minute.”
“I’m damaged, Aiden. Maybe you won’t want to be next to me all night.”
“Where would I want to be?”
“With someone who’ll let you touch her.”
“Is it my turn now? To let you know what I think?”
“Yes. Of course.”
“Let’s start with the first part of what you said. I already told you that I’m yours, anytime and anywhere, so do you want me to start undressing for you now?” he asks, as he reaches for his tie.
“No. Well yes, but we have to go to the party.”
“Pity. But just so we’re absolutely clear on this, I’m going to tell you again. Say the word, and my clothes are coming off.”
“We have a ‘word’?” I ask, teasing him.
He tilts his head and seems to think about it. “Cock.”
“What if I have to use that word in conversation? Will you just drop trou?”
“Yes. But I can’t imagine you using the word in polite conversation.”
“When have you ever known me to have a polite conversation unless I’m faking it?” I ask, and he gives me that smile of his that has panties dropping two states away. “I can use that word. When women are looking at you like you’re their last meal, I can say ‘I just love having Aiden’s magnificent cock in my mouth.’ Or when they’re checking out your package, I’ll tell them ‘that cock fills my pussy like no one else’s can.’”
“Are we sure we need to go to this party. Because now my cock wants to come out and play. However you are ready for, I mean. No pressure,” he says, turning serious.
“You shouldn’t even have to ask. I hate that you have to say that.”
“Time for me to talk about the rest of what you said. There is no place I would rather be than next to you tonight, and every other night. Morning, afternoon, evening—I want it all. We’re all ‘damaged’ in some way. You accepted me, when I was thinking I couldn’t be the man you needed. I gave us both a couple of months of happiness, and then I let you down. But you’re still here, making me feel like I could be that guy again. Do I want to touch you? And run my mouth all over your body? Fuck, yeah. Can I wait until you’re ready for that? Another fuck yeah.”
“What if I’m never ready? I think I will be, maybe even soon, but I won’t know until we try. And I might freak out.”
“Whenever you want to try, you let me know. If you aren’t okay with it, we’ll stop. I’m in love with you, El. Not your body, but you. All of you.”
“You like sex.”
“I do like sex. And with you, I fucking love it. But I hope you can give me a little credit and realize that I’m more than a magnificent cock and hot ass.”
“I never said anything about your ass.”
“You were checking it out pretty hard when I walked in. It’s all good, I work hard to keep myself looking so hot.”
I burst out laughing. “No one’s ever going to accuse you of having ego problems. But thanks. I know you’re more than your body, Hawk,” I tell him, using my nickname for him.
From the time we met, he’s always had a focused intensity on whatever he’s doing, and watches everything like a hawk. He used to hate it when I called him that, but when he realized I meant it as a compliment, he told me he loved that I appreciated his quirk. Let me tell you, when that laser focus is on me and my body, I really, really do appreciate it.
“I just realized that I haven’t told you how beautiful you look tonight. As usual, I had trouble catching my breath when you opened the door.”
I’m in something the “old” Ellie would probably have never worn. It’s a dark green dress that is somewhat fitted, but covers me from my neck to right above my knees. It has a sheer, cape-like thing that comes out from the sides to cover most of my arms, while flowing down my back. Stella was really excited about finding me all of these cool retro dresses, but while I like them, I miss me. Or at least the part of me that dressed in what felt good, not caring what anyone else saw or thought. I’m thinking that maybe I can slowly start bringing her back, and combining the two.
“You don’t mind that I cover up more?”
“No. I’d say it’s because I have less guys to warn off, but you’re never lacking for attention, no matter what you wear.”
“Thank you. I just need to put on my heels, and some lipstick. Then we can go.”
“Hold off on the lipstick. I need a few minutes with your lips.”
“Just a few?”
“You’re the one who said we had to go to dinner.”
“I know. We have a date.”
“Uh-uh. Nope. This is not a date. Our first date is not going to be a group outing with D.C. society.”
“So what is it? Are we not going to be together once we get there?”
“I don’t know what to call it, but it’s definitely something. Let me make this clear, El. I am not leaving your side unless it’s to hit the head, and even then I hope you’ll stay nearby.”
“You want me to hang out outside of the bathroom while you take a piss?”
He shrugs. “You can come in if you want. I’ve been in the bathroom while you pee.”
“Yeah, no. And you walked in on me, I didn’t invite you.”
“Whatever. Just stay close, please. I don’t want to have to punch some guy who thinks he can take a shot while I’m incapacitated.”
“Do you ever listen to yourself speak?”
“Nope. That would probably be a disaster.”
“Just when I think I can’t love you more, you go and say something like that,” I tell him, and then freeze. We’ve both used the “L” word, but I haven’t said it since I’ve been here.
“I love you, too, Ellie.”
I don’t say anything else. I can’t right now. I bend down to put my shoes on, tentatively reaching out to hold onto Aiden’s shoulder as I step into them. His muscles flex under me, but he doesn’t move. Once I’m standing straight again, we’re almost the same height. I’m ready to try something. Something small, but meaningful.
I move both my hands down to his, and take them in mine. Then I move them to my hips and place them there. I don’t flinch and it doesn’t feel weird—or bad. Aiden’s hands feel right. He’s still holding them stiff on me, but he doesn’t need to.
“You can relax your hands, Aid. I’m okay.”
“You’re sure?”
Instead of answering, I lean forward and kiss him. After a few moments, his fingers automatically relax, and he starts to rub my hips with his thumbs. I place my hands on his glorious pecs and take things a little more passionate. There are still several inches separating us, but this is more than we’ve done this past week. He pulls back before I’m ready and I chase his lips for a few more kisses as he chuckles.
“Dinner. We have to go to dinner.”
“I know,” I say with a sigh.
“We’ll come back here after.”
“Or we could go to your place.”
“If you want.”
“I want. I’d like to see it again.”
We stayed there when we came into town to support Isa, and I have some very hot memories of the things we did. I can tell Aiden’s having the same thoughts; although, he’s trying hard to be a gentleman and hide what he wants. He’s going to get rewarded for his behavior as soon as we’re alone later. And the
n maybe, someday soon, I can let him make me feel good too.
* * *
Aiden
Walking into the party at Liz Mason’s house is like blasting back to my past. One I worked hard to put behind me. Mingling with Virginia’s polite society, and D.C.’s power players, is just not my scene. There’s just too much fake going on—fake boobs, fake marriages, and most importantly, fake support. Everyone is out for themselves. Well, everyone except for my dad. He’s always been open and upfront about everything he does. Which is why no one ever believed he would be President one day, even if he hadn’t come out.
I’m surprised when Ellie reaches over and takes my hand, but I don’t really blame her. Swimming in shark infested waters is safer than mingling at this party. Jake’s friend, Vicki, spots us and quickly engulfs Ellie in a hug. One that has Ellie stiffening her spine, and squeezing my hand hard enough to break it.
“Ease up, Vicki. You don’t want to smother her to death, do you?”
“Sorry,” she says, sheepishly. “I’m just so happy to see a couple more people who won’t make me want to throw myself off the second floor balcony.”
“You know you’d survive the fall, right?” Ellie asks her, trying to sound like her “normal” funny self. But I don’t even know what her normal self is anymore. I don’t think she does, either.
“Of course you have to remind me. Thanks.”
“Anytime.”
“Let’s go get you a drink,” she tells her. “You’re going to need it.”
“What about me?” I ask.
“You’ve been swimming in these waters for years.”
“I left this scene almost 15 years ago.”
“It’s like riding a bike. Just jump back on and take them all for a spin.”
“Don’t you dare take anyone for a spin until I get back, Aiden Ford.”
“Wasn’t planning on it, Doll. Go have fun with Vicki while I find my dad so the two of you can meet.”
She looks at me strangely, because of course they’ve met before. You can’t work for a secret organization that has unofficial government approval without meeting the Vice President. But she’s only met him when he’s working, not when he’s being my dad. Despite being in a house belonging to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff and her billionaire husband, tonight my dad will be just that to Ellie. My dad. At least if I have any say about it.
I find him, and Andres, in the formal living room. They’re surrounded by supporters, but my dad breaks free once he sees me. That’s one thing I can always say about my parents—I’ve always come first, not matter what.
“Aiden,” he says, hugging me tightly. “It’s so good to see you.”
“You too, Dad,” I tell him truthfully.
“Hey man,” Andres says, giving me a “bro hug.”
We met in the military, before I even knew Matt and Nate. We all joined the Special Forces together, although he went into a different branch. I tried to keep in touch as best as possible, but we dropped out of contact. Until he started dating my dad last year.
To say that was a surprise is an understatement. I always thought he was into women, but hey, he makes my dad happy and that’s all I care about. We still don’t see each other much, but I’m glad he’s back in my life.
“Hey, Andy. How are things? My dad treating you okay?” I ask with a wink.
“We’re good. You should be coming around more now that you’re local.”
“I should. I get too caught up in my own shit sometimes, you know?”
“I do know. We’d love to have you over, though.”
“Yes, we would,” my dad says, putting his arm around him and kissing his temple.
Okay, so maybe it is weird. Not because they’re guys, but because that’s my friend. I’d feel the same if my mom was the one Andy was with, or if Audrey was with my dad. It’s odd to have a friend dating your parent.
I’m not sure how she knew that I needed her, but Ellie is all of a sudden at my side, taking my hand in hers again. “Did you miss me, Hawk?”
“Always,” I say, looking over at her with a smile.
“Hello, Ellie.”
“It’s nice to see you again, sir.”
“You’ve met?” Andres asks.
“Oh yes. Ellie has attended some official events in the past, and she’s not easy to forget, especially with how often you’ve mentioned her to me.”
“Hold up. I wanted to make the introductions,” I say, sulking a little.
“We’ve just established that I’ve already met your father.”
“But only as VP, not as my dad.”
She chuckles, but squeezes my hand, so I know she gets it. “By all means then, go ahead and introduce us properly.”
I stand up straighter and puff my chest out a little. “Dad, I would love for you to meet my girlfriend, Ellie. It’s a good thing you’ve gone to the other team, because if you looked even a little interested in her, I’d have to knock you out.”
“Aiden,” Ellie chides me.
“What? He’s dating one of my friends already.”
“I wouldn’t go after your girlfriend, though.”
I feel like crap now. “I know. Sorry about that. I was trying to be funny.”
“And show me how much Ellie means to you.”
“That too,” I acknowledge. “Anyway, Ellie, this is my dad and his boyfriend, Andres.”
Ellie holds out her hand, while her eyes twinkle. “It’s a pleasure to meet you both.”
“The pleasure is all mine, and please call me Tim.”
“You can call me Andy,” my friend tells her.
“Now that all the niceties are done with, I suppose we should mingle,” I say with a grumble.
“Don’t worry. I’ll hold your hand,” she tells me.
“Thank you,” I tell her, looking into her eyes with a smile, when I really just want to kiss her. Even though she let me earlier, I don’t want to push her in any way. She takes the awkwardness away when she leans in, and brushes my lips with hers.
“Welcome.”
I wish we were alone. Like really wish that. We’re not, and we can’t leave anytime soon. Not when everyone’s already seen me arrive. Did I mention that I hate all of this?
Chapter 4
Aiden
“Aren’t you two adorable,” Jake says, coming up and clapping me on the back a few minutes later.
“Leave them alone,” Isa tells him. “We probably looked like that, too.”
“Looked?” I ask her with a smirk.
“Yeah, yeah. We’ll always look like that. I know it and I own it. So, move along,” Jake tells me.
“You started it,” Ellie reminds him.
“You did,” Isa agrees.
“Anyway. It’s good to see you both.”
“You too. Your mom sure packed the house tonight.”
“She does love a good party.”
“And thankfully, she loves me now too,” Isa says.
“Did you and Liz have a rocky start?” Andres asks her.
“You could say that,” she says with a smile. Rocky—yeah, if putting a hit out on someone could be considered “rocky.” That’s not for public knowledge, though, so I keep my mouth shut.
“I’m Andres, by the way,” he tells them.
“Oh shit. Sorry. I thought you’d all met since Isa and Jake have been in town for a few weeks now.”
“No. We’ve been busy with some stuff for my mom, and well, our own stuff.”
“Ah, another medal then.”
“Don’t even think about answering that,” Isa says with a blush. She got him a sex-a-thon medal as a joke, and now we all tease them both about it whenever we can. And he holds it over us guys, reminding us that our women haven’t give us one.
“Medal?” my dad asks.
“Inside joke,” I tell him, winking at Jake, who bumps fists with me.
“Aiden, is that you?” I hear from behind me, and cringe. I knew I’d run into at least one
person from my teens here, I was just hoping it wasn’t someone I’d fucked. No luck there.
“Hi, Brandi,” I say as she walks around me when I don’t turn.
“Is that all the welcome I’m getting?” she asks with a pout.
“Pretty much,” I tell her, lifting Ellie and my clasped hands for her to see.
She glares down at our hands, and I don’t even try to hide my eye roll. I haven’t seen this chick in over a decade, and it’s been even longer since we hooked up. I don’t know what she was expecting. Apparently more than I’m willing to give.
“You’re going to save me a dance, right?”
“No. I only dance with my girlfriend. Nice seeing you,” I tell her as I pull Ellie away.
She’s shaking with laughter. I feel bad leaving my dad to suffer the fallout of my getaway, but he’s got our friends to help him out. If all else fails, he can call his detail in to take her away.
“Running from a woman? Really?”
“Yes, Doll. I’m man enough to admit that certain women scare me. Some of them, because they can potentially kick my ass; that one, because I thought she might jump me right in front of you.”
“I’d protect my property.”
“Property?”
“You said I own you.”
“I’ll show you all about owning,” I say, reaching for her, and stopping myself just in time.
I drop my hand and close my eyes, trying to think how exactly to apologize. “Open your eyes, Aiden,” she tells me. I do as she asks. “It’s okay. I mean, it’s not, but that’s on my side of this situation. You shouldn’t have to hold back. If you want to go back over there to Brandi, I’ll understand.”
“You think because I can’t touch you right now, I’d leave you for someone else?”
“It’s not fair.”
“No. It’s not. But that’s my fault, as much as it’s yours. I should’ve been there, and you shouldn’t have gone in. We can’t change that, but we can do what you asked, and try to move on. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”
“Can I kiss you again?”
“You’re not seriously asking me, are you? Because I have never denied you a kiss.”
“Yes, you have.”
“Not since I told you I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
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