“Oh, I assure you,” came a clear, husky voice from the back of the chapel, “his intended is not scared easily. And my name is Lillian Lancaster, not ‘the chit.’”
Nick couldn’t slow his heart enough to attempt to count the beats. It thumped in his ears as Lillian made her way down the center of the small chapel aisle, a breathtaking vision in a flowing green gown with a crown of the palest yellow flowers in her rich black hair. He swallowed, unable to speak past the enormous relief flooding him. She was here and she still wanted to marry him. Damnation, he should not feel so bloody glad.
She stopped in front of him, fragrant and flawless with her bright blue eyes and alabaster skin. She leaned close, the neckline of her wedding dress offering a lust-sparking display of her ample curves. He struggled against the desire to take her in his arms and vow to protect her for the rest of his life. At this moment, a seduction seemed a rather good thing.
She wet her lips before speaking. “Might I have a word with you in private before we marry?”
She could have more than a word. Damn. His control was more than slipping. He felt divided in half, the two parts of himself battling against each other. The part of him that wanted to touch her triumphed. He took her cold hand, and a startled hiss of breath escaped her. He led her to the door at the side of the chapel where the reverend had come from. After she went through the doorway, he turned to face Salisbury, his wife, Drew and Charlotte. “If you’ll excuse us, we’ll be back in a moment.”
Everyone smiled and nodded. Tension coiled through Nick, knotting his muscles in his neck. Lillian faced the window, her face hidden from his view. With one glance at her round backside and long, slender neck, desire gripped him. He wanted to press his lips to her silky skin and hear her moan. Shoving his increasing lust aside, he said, “You wished to speak with me?”
She swung towards him. The wariness he’d recognized a moment ago in her gaze appeared to have increased. Her hand fluttered at her neck and then rested open-palmed on the side of the slope. “Why have you done all this?”
He considered for a moment how honest he should be. The thought of lying to her was repugnant. She’d been lied to enough, he was certain. “I wanted to make you happy.”
Her shoulders sagged. “We had a deal. You agreed to a marriage of convenience. I cannot marry you if you want any more than that.” Her gaze searched his. “If you want more from me, tell me now or vow that you’ll stick to our bargain. If you can’t, I’ll walk away.”
“What about the theatre? You’d lose it.”
Her lips pressed into a thin, hard line. “So be it.”
He had no right to want anything from her or for himself. Whatever longings were trying to surface he would fight them. She needed him, and he would not fail her. Besides, denying his own desires for Lillian was small penance for what he’d done to Amelia. “I promise you an utterly loveless marriage.”
Her mouth fell open, and then she twitched as if she realized how she must look. She snapped her lips shut, her oval face shimmering like a hard pearl. “Do you have the marriage contract?”
He reached into his coat and handed it to her. As she read the document, her tense and drawn features relaxed. Some of the knots of tension in his neck uncoiled. He stepped closer to her. “Are you satisfied?”
“Perfectly. Let us marry.”
He followed her out the door, unsure whether he’d just gained a victory or set himself up to fail them both.
Despite the stoked fire warming the opulent pale blue bedroom appointed to her in Nick’s home, Lillian was freezing. She should be at home yet Nick had insisted she stay the night with him. How could she refuse? She had promised to acquiesce to conjugal rights, and true to what she knew of men, Nick wanted his rights tonight.
Yet he didn’t seem like most men she’d known nor did he act like them. She could not rid herself of the trembling that had taken hold of her since the moment she stepped back into the chapel and took a good look at what Nick had created for her. Her dream had been brought to life perfectly by the handsome man who’d stood beside her and in a deep voice, smooth as silk, taken her as his wife and had lied to God and all present, to honor and protect her for the rest of his life. Men didn’t protect women and they certainly didn’t honor them, did they? And they confused love for lust as far as she could tell.
Lillian clenched her chattering teeth as she sat on the edge of the elegant bed and removed her slippers from her aching feet. She never should have worn shoes that were too small just because they were the least frayed.
She pulled her right foot towards her and winced as her bruised big toe hit her knee. Her cheeks burned with mortification. She’d have to apologize to Nick again when she saw him for her two left feet when he’d attempted to lead her in a waltz. Heaven above, the man was daft orchestrating a wedding at night with a dinner all so he could ask her to dance after dinner. Despite herself, a smile tugged at her lips.
Bless Nick. He’d tried to patiently guide her, but her embarrassment of having never learned to dance had taken a beastly hold and made her unable to follow his movements. She dearly wished she’d seen that tray of champagne before she’d twirled into it. Whatever must he think of her? No doubt Nick was second guessing their marriage now. That would work in her favor if he was regretting things, yet she found the idea of causing him humiliation made her heart ache.
The rapping on her bedroom door sent her scrambling onto her feet. “Who is it?”
“Nick.” His tone was low and held the same huskiness that he’d spoken his wedding vows with. Her heart sped in fear and surprising anticipation. Part of her had been unsure if he’d require her wifely submission tonight or if she’d so mortified him he’d not want to lay eyes on her until tomorrow―or maybe never.
She ran a smoothing hand over her dress and tried to calm the tumbling of her stomach with a steadying breath. “Come in.” Her choked tone made her frown. For heaven’s sake! She had to get control. He was merely a man, and a seemingly nice one at that. Whatever transpired tonight, she would survive.
The door swung open with a gentle swish. Nick strode in and stopped a few feet away. His bright green eyes darkened to the color of winter moss as he assessed her, and a smile, as intimate as if he’d caressed her, lifted the corners of his lips. As she took in his appearance, her pulse spun out of control.
Gone were his black silk trousers, black silk coat, fine cambric shirt and the elaborately tied neck cloth he’d worn for their wedding. In his earlier attire, he’d looked handsome, like the picture of a perfectly dressed gentleman who had every confidence in the world. Now, though…
She blinked, conflicting emotions pounding through her, and drank in the sensuality of the picture he presented. He looked dangerous and wicked wearing a thin cotton shirt open at the neck to expose the skin of his chest. She allowed her gaze to travel lower to his trousers, which appeared to be made of a thin loose silk unlike anything she’d ever seen. Still lower, his feet were bare.
Heaven help her. She swallowed. Desire and fear made her knees tremble with weakness, but she locked them in place and stood firm. She raised her gaze to find him watching her with hungry eyes that obliterated the safe distance between them. Icy fear twisted around her heart. “Are you here to take me?” Good Lord above. Had she really just asked that and in such a quaking tone?
His scorching gaze turned hard and filled with distaste. A muscle flicked angrily at his jaw, and she feared her question had annoyed him terribly. Her body tensed as she prepared for the worst. Without a word, he closed the distance between them and stood so close to her she smelled the faint trace of soap that lingered on his skin and felt the heat coming off his powerful body. “I’m here to teach you to dance. It’s why I asked you to stay the night.”
She couldn’t stop the snort of laugher that escaped her. “You can’t be serious! I’ve embarrassed myself and you quite enough for one night.”
A flash of humor crossed his face, but then an emotion she couldn’
t quite place flickered in his eyes. He stepped near her and ran one finger down the side of her arm to settle his hand on her waist and draw her near. “You didn’t embarrass me. Nor will you ever. Never forget that.” It sounded like a command and she found herself nodding. He squeezed her waist before releasing her. For once she wished he’d lingered just a moment more. His touch was so deliciously warm and oddly reassuring. “Dancing on your wedding day was your dream and by God, I intend to make it happen.”
“Thank you.” Her words were breathless, but she was just glad she’d gotten them out. Her senses reeled.
“Once you’ve been taught to dance you’ll be exquisite. I’ve been watching you. You’re naturally graceful.” His voice had dropped low and throbbed with emotion. “Come.” He didn’t grab her hand again but simply motioned her to follow him. She walked silently behind him, studying him. He strode down the corridor with a commanding air of self-confidence. And no wonder! His powerful legs carried him down the hall in steps that required her to triple her own to keep up. Yet she didn’t mind. She enjoyed being able to scrutinize her new husband without his knowing it.
The muscular outline of his shoulders strained against the fine white shirt he wore and made her pulse flutter. His thick dark hair curled around his neck and invited her to plunge her fingers into his silky tresses.
Goodness. She fanned herself as she walked. She couldn’t believe she was having these thoughts. They descended the stairs in silence, and as they continued through the portrait gallery she became distracted looking at all the paintings, so that when Nick stopped she was surprised. He turned to her and gestured towards an open door. “The ballroom, if you please.”
She took his hand and allowed him to lead her into the most breathtaking room she’d ever seen. Beautiful crystal chandeliers glowed above, which allowed her to drink in the details. The floor was a rich gleaming wood in a parquet design. Golden columns lined the archways of the walls and reached towards the ceiling, where an amazing glass structure kept the dark night at bay. She couldn’t wait to see this room in the morning with the sun blazing through the cut glass. “My goodness, it’s beautiful.”
“Not near as lovely as you.” Nick’s breath caressed her neck as he encircled her waist and her back met with the unforgiving hard flesh of her husband’s solid body. He turned her to face him with gentle care, yet as he did, every inch of her skin reacted to him. Heat poured through her with exciting, frightening swiftness.
His sensual smile indicated he knew he affected her. Blasted man. He pressed one hand against her back, grasped her right hand and moved it to rest against his chest. His heart thumped underneath her knuckles for the space of a breath before he raised their hands slightly into the air. “Put your other hand on my upper arm.” The deep sensuality of his voice sent a ripple of awareness through her.
Shaking, Lillian set her hand on the curve of his arm. “Like this?”
“Perfect.” It was one simple word, but it was the way he said it, as if she could do no wrong. The trembling of her body eased as he spoke to her and told her when and where to step. At first, she followed his lead awkwardly, but after a while, she forgot to concentrate and let herself relax.
They didn’t speak. They didn’t need to. The silence was comforting, as if they’d known each other for years. Once Nick no longer had to instruct her, he started humming a tune, or at least she thought he did. As dreamy as she felt, an entire orchestra could have marched into the ballroom and she probably wouldn’t have noticed it.
Nick swirled her around the room, and whether it was the way he led her, or how he’d taught her to move, or his uncanny ability to make her feel at ease, she was having so much fun that when he eventually brought them to a stop, she had to force herself not to beg him to continue.
His gaze danced with amusement as he glanced down at her. “I hope the frown on your face is because you didn’t wish to stop.”
She blushed but grinned. “Nick, that’s the most fun I’ve ever had.”
He offered her a sudden arresting smile. “I’m pleased to hear it. All I wanted for this day was to bring you joy.”
In this moment, she wanted more. She wanted him to kiss her. The thought shocked her. Would she tense up or melt in his arms like she had moments ago? “Is that truly all you want?”
He touched her trembling lips, her already erratic pulse jumping wildly with the contact. “I’d like to kiss you, but I’m fighting very hard against my desire.”
They were both fighting themselves, it seemed. Her whole body flooded with the longing to be kissed on her wedding day by her husband, but she was too afraid to voice how she felt. Instead, she licked her lips, her body swaying toward Nick’s. His hand tightened around hers and he groaned. “Lillian, I’m struggling to resist you.”
Her heart roared in her ears. “Quit struggling.”
“God, Lillian.” Nick slid his hands into her hair, his fingertips curling around her head. A light pressure moved her face closer to his until their lips were almost touching. His eyebrows rose in question. “I have to know you trust me.”
Her pulse pounded like a drum. She swallowed. “In this moment I do. I truly do.”
He brushed his knuckles down the side of her cheek. “Then I’ll take this moment and cherish it.”
Before she could respond, his lips pressed light as a feather against hers. Not threatening in any way but inviting, enticing. He massaged them with his, until she moaned and leaned towards him in hopes he would deepen the kiss. He responded with such blinding speed and intensity that for one second she was startled, but not afraid. A strangled groan came from him as he touched his tongue to her lips. She parted them eagerly and nearly melted with need when he delved deep into her mouth and slowly circled his tongue around. She touched and retreated while enjoying the silky warmth of his mouth.
He moved one hand to her neck where his fingers traced back and forth over the exposed skin of her chest. Unable to help herself, she arched her back towards him, little whimpers of desire coming from her. When his hand brushed over her breast, she tensed and he pulled back ever so slowly to end the kiss.
“I’m sorry.” His words hummed with restraint.
She laid her palm against his beard-roughened cheek. “No, I’m sorry. I―” She looked past him towards the door and searched for how to tell him what she was feeling. She wanted to be as honest with him as he’d been with her tonight. “I enjoyed every moment of tonight.”
“Even the kiss?” Doubt filled his voice.
She glanced at him sharply and curled her fingers around his strong jaw. Something inside her opened a little wider at his display of vulnerability. The man was nothing like she’d ever expected. He was so much more and better. “Especially the kiss. I’d like to try another tomorrow if you don’t mind.” Egad, she felt foolish, slightly scared and happy.
His burning gaze held hers, and her heart turned over in response. “I think I can arrange another kiss.” His voice was like the most seductive caress that left her shivering. He inclined his head towards the door. “I’ll see you to your bedroom. I instructed my servants on penalty of losing their position not to step a foot out of the servant’s quarters until the morning, but it’s nearing five and they will be stirring.”
“Five!” She gasped. She’d been so preoccupied by dancing with him and kissing him, she’d not noticed the lack of lurking servants or the sky lightening above them or her aching feet or heavy eyes. Yet now, exhaustion claimed her. She smiled, then promptly yawned. By tacit consent, they grasped hands and strolled slowly down the corridor and up the stairs.
He paused in front of her chambers and kissed her on the forehead. The kiss, tender and reassuring, was every bit as wonderful in its own way as the passionate kiss she’d shared with him moments ago. Stepping away from her, he bowed. “Until tomorrow. I mean later today.” His grin was infectious.
“Tomorrow,” she agreed and forced herself to go into her room and shut the door. After
undressing, she settled into the fluffy covers to try to sleep. Her thoughts kept returning to Nick. He was the most honest man she’d ever met. The care and sensitivity he’d shown her in the past several days was like a salve on her wounded soul, yet would she feel the same way about him when they were undressed, flesh to flesh, and he wanted to truly make her his? Could she stand to lie with him? She just wasn’t sure, and the doubt took away a little of her happiness.
The next morning Nick sat in his office trying to think about his estate and not Lillian when his butler knocked and announced Drew. Nick set down his quill as Drew strolled in, plopped into the chair opposite Nick’s desk and gave Nick a puzzled look.
Nick leaned back with a sigh. “I assume you’ve something to say to me or you wouldn’t be at my house at eleven in the morning instead of home with your wife.”
“Perceptive as always, cousin.” Drew tapped his fingers on his knee for a moment before speaking. “If you married the Lancaster chit out of convenience why did you make her stay the night with you last night?”
Nick felt his jaw drop open. “I did no such thing. Besides, how did you know Lillian stayed here?”
“Charlotte made me go to the theatre this morning to see if your wife cared to come for tea. Her seamstress informed me, with a severe frown, that you’d forced her poor mistress to stay at your home. Seems the woman knows that the two of you are married―only in name.”
Nick leaned forward, his right eye twitching with irritation. “Not that it’s any concern of yours, but I asked Lillian to stay so I could teach her to dance. Nothing else.” Drew didn’t need to know about the kiss.
Drew’s smug smile grew wider. “Is this part of your grand plan to never love your wife?”
Nick wanted to put his fist through his cousin’s arrogant face. “Yes.”
Drew guffawed. “You need to seriously reconsider your plan. At the rate you’re going, doing all these little nice things for her, the woman will be in your blood whether you like it or not.”
Season For Surrender (A Danby Family Novella Book 2) Page 6