by Kris Jayne
“Any diarrhea or intestinal discomfort?”
“None.”
“And this started yesterday?”
Shannon thought for a moment. “It got worse yesterday. Yesterday was the first day I threw up, but as I think about it, I haven’t feel well for several days. Maybe it’s not food poisoning. Maybe I have some kind of stomach flu.”
“Not likely if you aren’t having intestinal symptoms.” Dr. Franklin paused, looking at her over the top of her reading glasses. “Given the reason for your last visit, I think we should consider other possibilities. When was your last period?”
The doctor flipped the Shannon’s chart to see if the answer was somewhere in her notes. Heat spread from Shannon’s scalp to her toes. Pregnant? No. She couldn’t be pregnant. Not again. That would ruin her. How could she even tell Jonah?
Sharp tingles ran from her scalp to her toes. If the baby was even Jonah’s. The blur of that weekend revisited her, and she felt dizzy.
“Why don’t you lie back for a second?” The doctor flew to her side and eased her back on the exam table. “We don’t have to jump to any conclusions. I can order a blood test, but we need to wait until you’ve actually missed your period. We have a relationship with the lab right down the hall, so you can come back and get it done here in the office.”
The vertigo faded, and Shannon sat up.
“I can’t be pregnant. I’m not that late, only a few days. That happens to me sometimes.”
Dr. Franklin squeezed her hand sympathetically. “One step at a time. I’ll write an order for a blood test next week. Rest here. I want to make sure you’re okay before I send you home. Is there someone you can call to pick you up? I don’t want you driving if you’re dizzy. You can come back in for a follow-up after the test results come back. If I put a rush on it, that’ll be a couple of days after.”
“I can’t keep taking off work. Can’t you tell me over the phone?”
The doctor hesitated. “I’d prefer that you come in. I’ll let the receptionist know to squeeze you in whenever you’re free.”
“Alright. I’ll see what I can do.”
The doctor left, and Shannon dialed Kim, who agreed to come get her.
She couldn’t have done this to herself. Again.
* * *
The thought that she could have a baby with a man she didn’t even know plagued Shannon the entire afternoon. Pleading sickness, she took off from work and stayed home to steep in her dilemma.
Before the pregnancy scare, Shannon decided not to call Lindsay and ask her what happened that weekend. She saw no point in rehashing the past. Now, the issue pressed on her mind, so she called her friend and crossed her fingers.
After dispensing with the polite greetings and recounting a few more happy tales from Laura’s short life, Shannon steadied her shaking hands and broached the subject.
“Lindsay, do you remember when Aaron helped me back into the house that night?”
“Yeah. You were really messed up. I am so sorry. I can’t say it enough. They never should have messed with you like that.”
“Well, um, I remember kissing Aaron, but that’s it. Everything’s a blank. I need to know if you, you know, maybe saw something or if something happened.”
“Oh, sweetie, do you really want to talk about that?”
Shannon’s skin prickled. “I need to know what happened.”
“I’m not even really sure. I was out front trying to get Kid’s cousin to get him out of here, and then when I came into the house, I didn’t see you or Aaron. A while later, he came back down the hall and just left.”
“How long, Linds? I mean was it a couple of minutes or an hour?”
“From the time you went inside?”
“Yes.”
“It had to be at least forty-five minutes that he was doing whatever.”
“Whatever? I was passed out.”
“Aaron’s a good guy.”
“Is he?”
“You said you were kissing him. Cori and Amber both told me you were making out in the hallway.”
“But you knew that they put something in my drink, and I was out of it. You didn’t think to wonder what Aaron could be doing back there with me?”
“You don’t even know that Aaron did anything. He might have been in the other room. He could have been in the bathroom.”
“By himself for forty-five minutes? Why didn’t anyone do anything?”
“I was busy, you know, burying my sister. I didn’t have time to chaperone you and Aaron.”
Lindsay’s blasé attitude about Aaron triggered Shannon’s defensiveness. “There’s a word for having sex with a woman who’s passed out.”
“Don’t go there, Shannon. Aaron is not some creep. If he got with you, it’s because you wanted it.”
“I didn’t know what I wanted. I was high.”
“Exactly.”
Shannon gritted her teeth. Should she go to the police? She sighed. What would she tell them? She thinks that maybe after making out this guy, they might have had sex? Her own friends didn’t support her.
The cops couldn’t even pick up Kid. She doubted they’d be terribly interested in investigating her rape accusations. Everyone would tell them exactly what Lindsay and Cori had told her. They’d think she was crazy.
The phone call she’d hoped would ease her worries only depressed her further. Tears flowed down her cheeks as reality hit her. The fog of that night might never clear—unless she was pregnant with Aaron’s baby. A nightmare might be the only closure she’d get.
* * *
“How’d the doctor visit go yesterday?”
For once, Shannon dreaded having dinner with Jonah, knowing he’d ask the prevailing question about her health. They sat at the Italian restaurant down the street from the Scarlet Maple. Feeling better, Shannon had a craving for pasta.
She cast her eyes on the checkered table cloth in front of her place setting. She’d have to tread carefully to answer without lying, and she certainly wasn’t ready to share her ordeal with him.
“The doctor doesn’t think it’s food poisoning. She’s running some tests, but she thinks whatever it is, I’ll be fine. It could have been the stomach flu.”
“Well, your color is better than the last time I saw you.”
Shannon forced a smile. “I did wash the Halloween makeup off.”
“And you feel better?”
“I do.”
“Good, then I can ask you what you think about my decision to run for office. I sprung that on you the other night, I know. I want to know what you think before I tell my parents.”
Her input mattered to him. The relationship they had meant something to him. Having a man like this love her was exactly what she’d always wanted. These moments should be the best of her life, but instead, her mind churned with worry. Her greatest ability might be deftly eluding happiness.
“I think you’re a good man who would make a great Congressman. If this is what you want, you shouldn’t let anything I have to say change your mind.”
He put down his fork and touched her hand. “I love you, and I know we haven’t been together for very long, but if I do this, it could impact your life as well as mine. We still have time before my deadline. Can you think about whether you could be there with me—on the campaign trail? That’s all. Just think about it.”
“I can do that…but aren’t you worried about my past?”
“No.”
“Jonah—”
“No,” he repeated emphatically. “This is why you hire PR people and political consultants—to manage the stories that your opponent might throw at you. We’ll get out in front of it. It won’t be a problem—but it will mean people will know your history. That’s what I want to make sure you’re okay with. So, think about it. Ask me questions.”
“Alright.” Shannon flashed a shaky smile.
Jonah put down his fork, his brow crunched. “Is everything okay? You’re quiet tonight.”
&
nbsp; The walls of the dining room seemed to close in on her. Nothing was okay, and she couldn’t tell him anything. They lived in two different versions of reality—one where their newly discovered love held nothing but promise and one where Shannon’s problems threatened doom.
“I think I’m just tired.”
“Things haven’t been the same since you got back from the funeral. How’s your friend?”
Another hidden trap of a question.
“She’s struggling. I talked to her this afternoon. It’s hard. Laura was so young. Dying of cancer, even if you know what’s coming, it’s still a shock. Makes you realize how short life is.”
Jonah took her hand and ran his thumb across the tops of her fingers.
“All the more reason we should focus on being happy in the time that we have.”
“I know. You’re right. Sorry I’m being such a downer.”
“You don’t have to apologize for being sad for a friend. I’d rather you tell me what’s going on with you than to keep things to yourself. ‘A harmful truth is better than a useful lie.’ Not that I’ve always lived that way.”
Shannon focused on her fork, using it to cut off a bite of lasagna and keep her gaze from meeting Jonah’s. Silence hung in the air for a moment.
“Where’s that from? The thing you said about truth sounds like it’s from somewhere.”
Jonah paused. “I’m not sure. You’re right. It’s a quotation, but I can’t remember who said it. Give me a second. I’ll look it up.”
He pulled out his phone and typed away, then waited for the magic of the Internet to deliver the results.
“Thomas Mann’s The Magic Mountain. Huh, I never read that book, so who knows where I heard that.”
Shannon looked Jonah in the eye. “It’s true. In the end, it’s better to deal with what is.”
“You don’t think ignorance is bliss?”
“I think just because something feels blissful, doesn’t mean it is. It’s like a tree falling in the forest. If you don’t know that you should be miserable, then you aren’t. Or are you?”
Jonah stopped to ponder Shannon’s question, but before he could answer, she waved him off.
“This is too serious. Let’s talk about something else.”
Jonah stared at her, his mouth slightly open as if words were trying to pry their way out of his mouth. “Okay. Vivienne says you’re going with her to a client meeting on Wednesday.”
Her excitement at the prospect broke through her melancholy mood. “I am. I’ll just be there to take notes and see the space, but still, that she’s letting me come is a big deal.”
“Have you thought anymore about school?”
“I have. I found some design classes at the community college. That might be easier for me to get started than applying to art school. Plus, I still have to work. It’s going to be hard enough to fit in one or two classes a week. I can’t go full-time, but if I save up, I’ll be able to afford it next year.”
“Tuition can’t be that much.”
“It’s not the tuition so much as time in school is time not working plus the cost of tuition.”
A light went on in Jonah’s eyes. Shannon sighed.
He didn’t understand what it was like to balance tiny amounts of money, little time, and goals that require both, and she was lucky. Not many single mothers—and none that she knew—had a child entirely supported by the father.
She reminded herself that Jeff let her off the hook for child support because he wanted her to do something with herself. Something other than having another baby.
“You know, I think I’m starting to feel a little sick. Maybe my stomach isn’t as ready for pasta and cheese as I thought. Would you mind if we got this to go, and I headed home?”
Jonah agreed quickly. “Sure. I’ll get the check and a box for your food. Why don’t you step outside? Get some fresh air.”
“Thanks.”
Shannon slowly pushed back from the table and ambled to the door, barely aware of her surroundings. The crisp autumn air rushed to meet her as she stepped outside, blowing away her mental fog.
The shame of her predicament snuck up on her again, but she squashed it. She had to stay focused and do the best she could where she was, and she never made good decisions out of self-pity and recrimination. Starting from now, she’d look at the truth of her life—good and bad—and just do better.
Chapter Twenty-Six
The sushi restaurant in Uptown served top-shelf cocktails and sake and the freshest sushi in Dallas. The food, plus the atmosphere, made it a favorite spot, which is why he suggested it as a place to meet and catch up with his almost brother-in-law Nick.
They ordered drinks, sashimi, and a platter of maki rolls.
“You’re coming up on a year running your own practice. How does it feel to be out from under the man?” Jonah asked. He picked up a piece of yellowtail tuna with his chopsticks and popped it in his mouth.
“Fabulous. You should try it.”
Jonah sighed. “I’m a company man at the moment, but I may make a change. My dad is pushing me to run for Congress.”
“Do you want to run?”
Jonah decided to be vague until he told his parents. “I don’t hate the idea.”
“You’d be great if you implemented some of the ideas you have about community development, representing the areas of town that don’t always get the attention they should. I’d vote for you…if you run for my district.”
“No, I think you’ve got a pretty stiff incumbent in that seat.”
“Congress.” Nick stroked his chin. “That would be interesting. What else is going on?”
“Not much. Working for my dad is as it always is. That alone might drive me to Congress. Sometimes I think it’d be less slimy.” Jonah snickered, drily.
“I’m sure you’d make Washington a little less slimy.”
Jonah sipped his martini. “I’d hope so.”
Nick tapped the table and heaved a breath.
“Jeff told me that you and Shannon are still dating.”
“Yeah, I didn’t know her connection to Jeff when I met her. Things are going well. I like her. A lot.”
Jonah didn’t know how to characterize the shift in their relationship from server-customer to couple.
“Have you ever talked to Jeff about what went on with Shannon?”
“No. I don’t see why I would. Whatever happened between them happened when she was young. She told me that she took off and had drug problems, but then she came back into Olivia’s life.”
“Look, if that’s what she told you, she skipped some details. It’s none of my business really, so tell me to shut up at any time. But she came back to town with her husband specifically to bilk Jeff out of money. They saw the articles about his selling the business and decided she could try to get a cut.”
“How do you know anything about this? Jeff hasn’t said anything to me,” Jonah sniped.
“He wouldn’t. It’s his ex-wife, and Jeff can be too nice for his own good—or yours in this case.”
“That’s not the Shannon I know.”
Nick put up his hands. “She could have changed. The whole thing with her ex-husband almost got Taryn killed. This was less than a year ago, and I know that in the end, Shannon confessed what was going on because her husband—”
“Ex-husband.”
“Now ex-husband went off the rails, and she wanted to protect Jeff and their daughter.”
“He’s a violent lunatic. I’ve seen that first hand.”
“Really?”
“That’s how I first met Shannon outside of her being my waitress. Kid showed up at the restaurant and attacked her in the parking lot. I think that was over the divorce.”
“Jesus, Jonah. Are you sure you want to get mixed up in all that?”
Jonah waved off the question. “I know she has a problematic past, but the woman I know today is picking herself up and moving on to do good things with her life. I’m not goi
ng to walk away from a woman I care about over a past she can’t change.”
“You’re in love with her.”
Jonah took the shock in Nick’s voice in stride.
“I am capable of that you know.”
Nick smiled. “Okay. I just…all the time I dated Vivienne, I don’t remember your hanging on to that many relationships.”
“I hadn’t met the right person.”
“You’re convinced that’s Shannon?”
“Yes. I feel that way. Maybe it’s delirium. We haven’t known each other that long, but I feel this pull toward her. I can’t explain it. I guess you think I’m being a fool?”
Nick shook his head emphatically. “No, listen, you can’t help who you love. You and I both know that for sure. It’s just that when Jeff and Taryn mentioned you and Shannon were a couple, he seemed to think it wasn’t his place to get in the middle of his ex-wife’s love life. But, you’re a friend, and it wouldn’t be right for me to know something and not tell you. I’m rambling now. I don’t want you to think I’m judging you.”
“I appreciate it,” Jonah assured him and meant it. He couldn’t ignore Shannon’s volatile history—no matter how much her smile sent the blood away from his brain. “I’m going into this eyes open. Trust me. My father has already presented me with a Shannon dossier.”
Nick’s jaw tightened. “He would do something like that.”
“I’m used to it.”
Jonah wished he wasn’t. Driven by his inherited stubborn streak, he planned to stay the course and force his father to accept Shannon eventually. Nick’s news did concern him. He couldn’t picture Shannon trying to shake anyone down. The ex-husband probably drove that bus.
He would ask Shannon. She never shied away from answering questions about her life before she met him. Every time someone warned him about her, Jonah found out something new. Thus far, none of it contradicted anything she’d told him. No one could accuse her of not being honest.
* * *
“You’re pregnant.”
Dr. Franklin started her spiel with lots of filler, and afterward, she provided advice for follow-up and support. Shannon only heard the two words.