Her stomach seized. After everything that had been done to her, the last thing she wanted was lives on her head. She stood and backed away from him.
“I don’t need to know.” He stood and started to come after her. She moved out of his reach as he grabbed for her, but still naked, he was so damn distracting. “Please, Nikolai. I am no one here. I shouldn’t know your secrets.”
He managed to capture her then and cupped her head in his hands. She instantly relaxed at his touch as the heat so often in his fingertips pervaded her scalp.
“Naveenah, I’m sorry.”
He stared deeply into her eyes, everything about him calming her now. Now she remembered only how much she felt when she was with him. Her body began to warm again, wanting his touch, never wanting him to leave her. He held her several more minutes, not saying anything, and then he pulled her against him. She went limp in his arms as if all her strength had been drained. He scooped her up and sat them back down in the clover and wildflower. He spoke to her softly in the other language he so often did. She ran her fingers over the dark markings on his shoulders, tracing their outline as far around his back as she could reach.
“What are these markings? They sort of look like words.”
“They are an ancient blessing in the language I speak sometimes.”
“Like you just were?”
He kissed the top of her head. “Yes.”
“Antares doesn’t have anything like this.”
“No. He wouldn’t.”
She started to drift into unconsciousness, so relaxed as he held her, so safe. He chanted softly some more, and Naveenah wished she understood the language because it always sounded so beautiful when he spoke it. Completely sated now, the last thing she remembered before drifting off to sleep was how good she felt in his arms and how she wished she would never have to leave.
* * * *
Naveenah stared at the reflection of a woman she thought she knew. However, in the past month or so, she realized she never really did. In the newly installed mirror in her room, she pulled at the skin on her cheeks, mussed up her hair, and stuck out her tongue.
“You hadn’t had sex in four years. Who’s gonna blame you if you get a little crazy?”
And in truth, she’d never had the kind of sex she was having now. When she and Nikolai came together, it was like spontaneous combustion, the kind of sex books are written about and legends are told. It was only natural to get carried away with someone…something that felt as good as the sex with Nikolai felt. She chewed her thumbnail, still looking at her reflection and trying to see if she looked at all different.
If it were just Nikolai, she could totally write that off as astounding sex, but what was her excuse for Antares then? Even now that man’s kisses burned white-hot in her memory. Oh, dear Lord. If anyone knew what his constant taking her to the brink of insanity then holding back was doing to her sleep. The erotic dreams were killing her. She wondered if Antares’s ulterior motive was making her lose her mind, because he was damn close.
It was beyond amazing being with a real man. She’d even been able to finally make peace with her troubled youth and the regrets for not letting Manny touch her beneath her clothing. She never would have found the satisfaction in his arms she did with Nikolai. It was good she’d told him no. It was a subject she had spent many hours thinking about since becoming an adult as Earth had outlawed sentimental unions long before she’d ever been born. Manny had been her only chance to know what it felt like to be with a man, until now, and she was glad she’d waited. It made her sad thinking about the current state between men and women on Earth. None of them knew what they were missing. Men didn’t need women and women didn’t need men, or so they all thought. They were independent of one another and so damn proud of it, but she found it heart wrenching, really. The only physical contact she ever had before Nikolai and Antares was that of her virtual lover, and now that she had experienced a real man of flesh and blood—felt the warm touch of her skin by someone intent on pleasuring her, inhaled the scent of a lover—there was no comparison.
She fluffed out the folds in her skirt, thinking that the two outfits she’d received were completely ornamental. Yes, the fabric was thick and heavy and flowed to her ankles, because as she was told, there was so much rubble in the streets, the skirts would offer her protection a lighter fabric would not, but these colors? Seriously? One was a baby blue, the other, palest yellow. With no other way to wash these garments other than to scrub them with her hands, the colors were completely inappropriate.
What she needed was a good pair of leather pants like Nikolai wore. She’d seen a man a few times through the crack in her door that looked about her size. She wondered if she could somehow trick him out of his pants.
She giggled to herself as she instantly thought of how pleasurable it was to get Nikolai out of his pants. Maybe there was something in the air on this planet. Of course she hadn’t noticed anyone else running around tearing clothing off, and until she’d met Antares and Nikolai, she hadn’t given sex more than a passing thought, so maybe it was just them. Maybe they were exerting some kind of mind control over her. She often wondered about that, right up until one of them showed up. Then she simply didn’t care.
What she was finding with Antares and Nikolai was so much more than she knew possible. Each satisfied her so completely, but each in a different way. Though the two brothers were similar in appearance, Antares was overall bigger, and his hair had thick waves, where Nikolai’s hair was darker, straight, and softer. Beneath the surface, they were entirely different, and the time she spent with each also just as varied. Antares was such a complex man with so many layers she wanted to get to know, but he kept them so very guarded. With him it was always part business. They would go out to the castle, and he would explain about his people, their way of life, and what he was attempting to accomplish.
She loved listening to him speak. It was the passion in his tone and the love in his eyes that held her captive. She knew she could sit and listen to him endlessly and never get bored. When he would hold her hand or play with her hair as he spoke, she felt as if nothing else in the world existed. Being in his arms was the completion of her soul.
Nikolai, on the other hand, most times seemed an open book. He liked sex.
Raw, hard, fast fucking.
She shivered at the thought of his body ramming into hers. She lived for every sensation, every sound and scent. Her breath caught, and just like that, she was ready. He was overwhelmingly arousing even when he was only in her imagination. She couldn’t breathe just thinking about him at times.
A knock startled her thoughts back to the present. She found her heart hoping it was Antares because she hadn’t seen him for almost a week now. She feared for him but had been reassured he was only busy. In truth, that hurt her heart. Why hadn’t he come to tell her himself that he was busy? Maybe her feelings for him were far more genuine than whatever it was he felt for her. She had to remember that he was king. He had an ultimate goal, and it wasn’t her. He only needed her for as far as giving him children, yet she was afraid she was falling hopelessly in love with him.
“Come in.”
She hated that she was still kept under lock and key, and that despite all the promises made her, she had still not been allowed to see her friends from the camp, but she was willing to be patient about that. This was a slow, tedious dance, the dance of trust. Antares had seen to as many of her needs as he was able, including fixing up her room, which had become quite cozy all things considered. The door pushed open, and her heart instantly skipped three or four beats.
“Nikolai.”
She had to focus to control her breathing and fought the smile that wanted to take over her face. Every time he walked through her door, it felt as if it had been eons since she’d seen him, and her heart became quickly overwhelmed with emotion. However, he, too, had disappeared from her life of late with no warning, and she was in no way going to let him think tha
t was okay with her.
“You can leave.” She turned her back to him, hoping with everything she had that rather than take her up on her invitation he would sweep in with apologies and words of flattery and make love to her again all day long.
“How poorly you greet me after all we did to one another on our last meeting.”
The lascivious meaning of his words dripped from his tone. On their last meeting, he’d taken her into the countryside again and they had sex in every way possible, and a few she wasn’t even aware of before he showed her. Still, she constantly feared that he thought badly of her, that she was just some easy fuck who didn’t require any thought if his cock wasn’t hard. She turned to face him, fisted hands on hips.
“Oh, don’t you all we did to one another me! That was an age ago, and I’ve not heard one word from you since. Back where I come from that makes you a…Well, nothing. I don’t think we have anyone who would act like that.” She remembered reading a term once in a book that seemed to fit here. “But I’ve read in a book where that would make you a player!”
He walked to her and wrapped her into his embrace, pushing her hair from her neck. He stared into her eyes for a moment on the way to laying his bite on her shoulder, sending shivers coursing through every part of her.
“I did like playing with you, Naveenah. If that makes me a player, then so be it.”
She sighed the second he began to suck on the bite mark he’d just given her. She was beginning to think she had a yes spot, because the second he started kissing her there, she wanted to say yes to anything he might suggest.
Moments later, but way too soon for her liking, he stopped and stepped away from her.
“However, my dear Naveenah, I did not stop by today to spend the day dallying in your bed.” He leaned close with a wicked grin. “Fool that I am.”
He began to walk back toward the door, and Naveenah thought he meant to leave. She was surprised by how desperately she didn’t want it and what lengths she was willing to go to in order to stop him. As he got to the door, he turned to her and smiled and, with great flourish, pulled open the door.
“Your ladies-in-waiting.”
He bowed as the three women she’d come to cherish came rushing toward her, all squeals and tears. She took them all in a group huddle, her own tears flowing freely as the heart of how very much she’d missed them came pouring out of her. She’d shared something special with these women that no one else but the four of them could ever possibly understand.
“You look so beautiful!” Violet said in awe.
“And clean!” Beatrix returned.
They all laughed and hugged once more.
Nikolai waited until he judged they had greeted each other sufficiently before speaking again. “I hope it pleases you, Naveenah. My brother has made arrangements for the ladies to be moved from their current residences to take the room beside you and the two across the hall, so you will all be close. He apologizes for the delay in coming through on this particular promise, but the rooms needed more preparations than originally thought. That is what the cacophony you’ve been hearing these past days has been about.”
He winked at her, and it was all she could do not to run into his arms and thank him properly for how happy he’d made her.
“I am afraid the doors will remain locked, at least for now, but you will be able to spend time together each day, and each of your situations should improve dramatically in the near future.”
“They already have!” Naveenah blurted, and then rushed into his arms, unable to keep herself under control. She was careful, though, not to allow all her emotions to show. The girls would not understand how she’d come to feel for him, and she didn’t want to give them the wrong impression and have to earn back their trust.
Nikolai had apparently missed the memo, however. He grabbed her tightly and ran his hand along her spine, making her tingle as he whispered into her ear. “I have missed you, Naveenah. May I come to you tonight?”
It was all she wanted. She quickly agreed with nothing more than a slight nod so the girls would suspect nothing, then released him and smiled.
“Ladies, I will leave you to see to your accommodations. Enjoy your reunion.”
Walking back toward the girls, she didn’t see him leave. However, the second the door closed behind him, she felt it—that cold that seeped into her bones whenever either man left. Perhaps it was a Vaturian thing, or possibly just something with those two men, but it made her sad. She longed for their return with such fervor it made her a little crazy at times. Though she never imagined feeling like this for another living soul, now she felt it for two.
Pushing all thoughts of her men from her mind, she took Beatrix’s and Rosalind’s hands and pulled them to sit on the bed with her, Violet immediately following.
“Oh, you have no idea how happy I am to see you all.”
Once settled on the bed, Violet took both her hands and stared at her with the look Naveenah knew too well—fear and uncertainty.
“Have they hurt you, Naveenah?”
“No. No, not at all. In fact…”
She blew a strand of hair away from her face, wondering how she would ever explain all that had happened and how her feelings were changing without all three of the girls hating her.
“They’ve been very good.”
“Well, they’re not animals, so I didn’t expect to see you with bruises or anything, but we were all so afraid for you.” Beatrix’s voice trembled as she spoke.
Naveenah reached across and took her hand. “We’re going to be okay. They have no hostility toward us. They are much too busy trying to save their world to be plotting against us. Honestly, nothing is as we thought it, but I don’t want to waste our first visit boring you with all the politics I’ve learned.”
“All right then, why don’t you tell us about that man then, because you two seem a lot more chummy than when he came to the camp and took you away.” Rosalind was not one to miss anything, and she was a head-to-toe hopeless romantic if one ever existed.
There were times Naveenah thought she had a sixth sense or a special power to feel other people’s thoughts and emotions. Still, she didn’t want to divulge too much just yet. Not if she was going to get the girls on her side.
“He’s been…” Naveenah changed directions with her thought, trying to downplay it all. “I’m very comfortable with him and his brother. They’ve been explaining the history and current situation to me so I can try and understand it. I’ve met a large handful of people so far, and they’ve…” She thought of Hador and a few other comments she’d heard in passing and decided to change her statement slightly. “…mostly all been very nice. Trying hard to make sure I’m comfortable, not frightened by the situation. They want me, all of us, to stay, but they are very serious about it being our choice.”
Violet responded with childlike enthusiasm.
“Woo-hoo, that means little more than seven months of this and we finally get to go home!”
Her comment, although innocent, overwhelmed Naveenah. She no longer felt the all-consuming desire to return to Earth, but she felt that telling them would be like telling a child there was no Santa.
“What’s wrong?”
“Rosalind, stop doing that ‘reading me’ thing! I’m fine.”
“No you aren’t. Something has changed about you. Do you think they’ve drugged your food?”
“No! Of course not. Look, I don’t want to get into all of it tonight. I just want to be happy we’re together again, fair enough?”
The three girls looked at her hesitatingly. She hated not being able to tell them everything, but there was no way they could understand what would appear to them as her sudden change of heart. They had to experience the people, see the great falls, chase wild chickens in a meadow, and laugh themselves silly at the antics of Wold trying to form metal into tools. For without experiencing all the things she had for themselves, they would never be able to step out of the position of vi
ctim. It was so strange that she got exactly what she longed for, to be with the girls again, only now too much had changed and being with them was uncomfortable at best.
“I wonder if Nikolai is still around.” She climbed off the bed and walked to the door. After pressing her eye to one of the many cracks in it, she realized there was no one around and turned back to three sets of eyes peering so intently at her she felt the need for air.
“Okay, fine.” She sighed heavily, realizing that putting them off would only work against her in the long run. “They aren’t what I thought. They’re just people trying to rebuild their lives after years of war and atrocities. No, that doesn’t mean I think it was okay to just take us. I just think I understand now why they did. And furthermore, I don’t know, if given the same set of circumstances, that I wouldn’t agree to do the same damn thing. It was shortsighted and selfish, but it wasn’t done with any malicious intent.” She shrugged. “We’re here. We agreed to stick it out one more year. I guess I just figure if I’m here for a year, I’d rather help than spend another day locked up and guarded.”
She was spent, unloading all the things she’d been feeling for weeks now and having no one to say it all to. Though she figured the girls would never appreciate it, she hoped they didn’t hate her for it.
“I can’t believe they got to you.” Violet sounded so disappointed, it hurt Naveenah’s heart.
“They didn’t get to me. I’ve experienced a lot since they took me from the camp. Things just aren’t what we thought they were.” She blinked away tears. These three women were the closest friends she’d ever had, and now there was this gulf between them she had no idea how to cross.
Beatrix, who rarely hid anything she felt, pushed her opinion in harshly. “I still say we find some way to communicate home, or steal a spaceship, or something, anything but just sit here letting our futures be decided by them!”
Naveenah sighed and closed her eyes. “Beatrix, I’m not sure they have any way to communicate with other worlds any longer. I haven’t seen anything on this planet that isn’t either broken or ancient. And Antares isn’t trying to restore Vaturia back to what it probably was with the technology and capability to leave the planet and communicate with other worlds. He wants something smaller, something more pure, more raw. I don’t know, like medieval England is the closest I can think of.”
To Love a King [The Reformation 1] (Siren Publishing PolyAmour) Page 13