by Casey Dawes
“The biggest problem is the burden on the parents. Since Alicia is a single mom, it’s twice as bad. She’s trying to go to college and keep a job.”
“A job she does very well.” An attractive brunette, her hands full of red, white, and blue linens, stepped into the clearing. “You must be Raúl. I’m Elizabeth.”
“Here, let me help you with those.”
“Thanks.”
“Raúl was speaking about Luis,” Marcos said. “He said it is difficult for Alicia to do everything she wants to do.”
“I can see that,” Elizabeth said. “I’m being as flexible as possible with her hours.”
How much should he reveal of Alicia’s struggles?
“I think it might be more than that.” Hunter gestured for Raúl to grab the other end of the plywood tabletop. “She needs help with Luis,” Raúl said. “And she’s having trouble finding it.”
“I thought her grandmother was taking care of him,” Elizabeth said.
“She is.” He held the top steady while Marcos tightened the bolts to hold it to the trestles. “But Alicia thinks it’s wearing her out.”
“Probably. Her grandmother isn’t a young woman.” Elizabeth smoothed the linens on the first table. “I think we’ll set up Mandy’s dishes, buns, and condiments here. We can have plates out by the barbeque. People can get their dogs and burgers and finish up here. We’ll put drinks and desserts over there.”
A highly efficient woman. No wonder she ran a successful business.
A moment later, she was in front of him, hands on her hips. “How do we help her?”
“I’m not sure I can answer that.”
Hunter and Marcos moved behind her, presenting a solid front. He took a step back.
“Look, man,” Hunter said. “Alicia’s pretty rotten at asking for help.”
Elizabeth cleared her throat.
“Okay, she’s not the only one.” This time Hunter’s smile did reach his eyes. “If she needs help, surely we can figure out something.”
“I think what she needs is babysitting help,” Elizabeth said.
“Sarah and I can take him at times—especially when the inn is empty.”
Elizabeth glanced at Marcos.
”We are good until harvest,” he said.
Hunter raised an eyebrow. “Maybe you can help out, too?”
He hesitated. “I’m not sure our relationship is ready for that. Will she trust me with Luis? I’ll offer, but it’s up to her.”
“She might want to see how you handle it.” A smile played on Elizabeth’s lips.
“It’s settled then,” Hunter said. “We’ll provide the help. Raúl gets to figure out how to make her take it.”
He had the most difficult task of all.
His phone buzzed. The number was unfamiliar, but it could be someone in trouble.
“Raúl?” The voice on the other end of the line had heavy overtones of Spanish.
“Sí?”
“It’s Juan. I’m in the States. I need help. They’re going to kill me.”
Chapter 10
What had the guys said to Raúl after she left them alone? When he returned to the kitchen, a spark had gone from his eyes, and the worried crease that always occupied the middle of his forehead was deeper.
“Is something wrong?” she asked when they were finally alone for a few moments.
“No. Nothing.”
“You look worried.”
“It’s nothing. Nothing for you to concern yourself with.” He patted her arm, picked up an armload of salads, and left the kitchen.
She yearned to stomp after him and tell him what she thought, but Luis was finally asleep, and she didn’t want to wake him.
Daisy thumped her tail on the floor, as if understanding how patronizing a man could be without even thinking about it.
“Grrr ...” She busied herself with kitchen cleanup. It was a good thing they weren’t using fine china during the party, because she would have broken some of it. As it was, there may have been a few new dents in the well-used pots.
When Luis finally woke, she coaxed him out to the party, despite his protests. Her temples throbbed as she looked around for Raúl.
“Here, let me take him.” Hunter’s firm voice brooked no disagreement.
She let go of her son, who looked at Hunter and shrieked.
“None of that, Luis,” Hunter said calmly.
Luis opened his mouth again and shut it.
“Good. Let your mother enjoy herself while we take a tour of the premises. Got to make sure there aren’t any bad guys here.”
Sarah was a lucky girl.
Alicia went to the grill where James was flipping burgers. “I’ll take one of those.”
“Coming right up.”
“I see you have duty.” Mandy slipped an arm around her husband.
“Yep. You hungry again?”
“I feel like I’m hungry all the time.” Mandy shrugged. “I’m only four months. I’ll be a small house before I’m through. Were you hungry like this?”
“Sometimes,” Alicia said. “But my family carries well, so it wasn’t a problem.”
“Who knows how my family carries?” Mandy laughed. “My mother isn’t speaking to me again. She wanted to come to our house for the entire duration of my pregnancy, and I said no. She got pissed.”
James snorted. “Better annoyed than dead, which is what she would have been if she stayed around you for any length of time.”
“How is she?”
“Fine when she’s on her pills. If not, she winds up being her old bipolar self.”
Alicia must have looked shocked, because Mandy added, “I didn’t mean to be as harsh as that sounded, but I have to maintain a sense of humor, or I start getting sucked into her craziness.”
James slid a burger on a plate and handed it to Alicia before putting his arm around his wife. “It’s okay, Mandy. Once the baby is born, you’ll roll with your mother’s idiosyncrasies more easily.” He rubbed his hand on her stomach. “I love you, sweetie.”
Mandy stretched her arms up and around James’s neck.
“Madre dios. Get a room.” Alicia left the grill and headed into the arbor, leaving a laughing couple behind her.
Where the heck is Raúl?
Eventually, she found him standing at the edge of the property, staring at the bay. His shoulders sagged, and his mouth drooped.
Longing for the touch from another human being, she came up behind him and put her arms around his waist. A bold move—probably too bold—but she needed to feel his warmth, a cherry on top of what was turning out to be a lovely day.
But he stiffened in response to her touch.
She let go. “What’s the matter, Raúl?”
“I told you. Nothing.”
“Then what are you doing out here by yourself?”
“Just thinking.”
“Uh-huh.” Sun sparkled on the whitecaps where a stiff breeze roiled the water. The fog was a gray smudge at the horizon.
Secrets. She hated them.
“I was talking with Marcos and Hunter earlier,” he said. “They seem like nice men.”
“And?” The randomness of the statement put her on guard.
“No ‘and.’”
A seagull’s call, like the squeak of a rusty swing on a playground, filled the silence between them.
“Yes, they are nice. My sister and her mother picked well.” Maybe he hadn’t meant anything, and she was imagining things.
“They could help you, you know.” He looked away from the view. “I mean with Luis.”
“You talked to them about me?” Her spine felt like someone had it in a vise.
“Yes. I know you’re looking for someone else to take care of Luis while you go to school.” A frown crossed his face.
“What gave you the right?”
“Look, Alicia, I was looking out for you. You can’t be angry with me about that.”
“I can take care of myself. I don’t
need you managing my affairs. I may be young, but I know what I’m doing.”
“I’m just trying to help ...” He splayed his hands.
“Well, don’t. Not unless you’re willing to tell me what’s going on with you.”
“I told you, this is personal. It has nothing to do with you.”
“So’s my situation with Luis.” Her chest was as tight as if she’d been a lifelong smoker.
He ran his hand through his hair and muttered something in Spanish she couldn’t quite make out.
They were making a mess of things, but she couldn’t figure out how to untangle the snarl of words. “Raúl, I—”
“Look, people are willing to help you if you’re willing to accept it. Everyone leans on someone else.”
“Except you.”
“That’s not true. I depend on Hadiya and my staff in the office. Why can’t you stop fighting people who want to help you? You want independence? Fine. Happy Independence Day.”
He stalked down the path to the parking lot.
What the hell had just happened?
“Alicia?” Sarah called out from the other trail, the one leading from the clearing. “I think Luis needs a bottle.”
Her sister emerged from the trees, Luis in her arms.
“Oh, honey, what’s the matter? Where’s Raúl?”
“He’s gone.”
She was all alone. Again.
Slumping onto a nearby bench, she burst into tears.
• • •
Alicia climbed the long stairway to the classrooms the following Tuesday night. The warmth of a coastal summer evening wrapped her in its embrace, but she was still chilled. What had gone so wrong with Raúl?
She needed to put him out of her mind. Hard to do when he was Luis’s doctor. But her child didn’t need another test until he was eighteen months—five months away. She’d be over Raúl by then.
Or she could find another doctor.
“Hi.” Josh came up beside her and smiled, his interest in her shining from his eyes. “Ready for class?”
She nodded.
“How are you doing with the text?”
“It’s fascinating. Who knew people could be so interesting? The more I read, the more I understand why my family acts the way they do.”
Josh laughed. “I think mine is a little crazy.”
“I think all of us believe that.”
He paused in front of the building. “I’ve been meaning to ask you. Are you seeing anyone?”
“No.” The word ended any thought she had of recovering her relationship with Raúl.
He looked at the sidewalk, then back up at her. “Would you like to go out with me sometime? Maybe go to the Boardwalk?”
“I haven’t been to the Boardwalk in ages.” Not since her mom had taken her as a kid, back when she thought she had a real family, before her life had gone downhill and never recovered.
It’d be fun to act like a kid again.
“I’d love to.”
His grin encompassed his face. No secrets there.
“How about Sunday afternoon? I know you have to work. Can you get away?”
Maybe her grandmother would be able to care for Luis for a few more hours after church. “I’ll have to check and get back to you. I have my son to care for.”
“That’s right. I forgot.”
Would he invite Luis along?
Raúl would have.
“I hope it works out.” He held the door for her. “It’d be fun.”
Her bubble of happiness deflated a little. “Yeah, it would.”
The class lecture was candy for her mind. Alicia chewed over every concept Dr. Susan laid out for them.
“We’re so committed to the ideal of a nuclear family—two heterosexual parents, two children—that we become blind to the reality of family’s purpose: to support the physical development of children, the emotional growth in adults, and care of the aging. Family is unique to each of us, and blood relationships, marriages, or their dissolution, can be a factor or not. Alicia’s paper demonstrated that understanding in a way that is unique.”
Her heart nearly burst with pride.
“In spite of the non-traditional structure, she’s lucky to have the people in her life she does.” Dr. Susan handed her the paper.
Tears washed her eyes as she stared at the big, red A on it.
She was a student. She was good at this. Flipping through the pages, she saw where she needed to improve—grammar and organization. A note at the bottom caught her eye:
From reading your paper, I can see that you have a lot going on. I may be overstepping my bounds, but I sense you are trying to do everything on your own. Family can be a great support if you remember to ask them.
Was that what Raúl had been trying to tell her?
He’d sure picked a lame way to do it.
On their way back to the stairs, Josh took her hand. She wanted to pull away. It was too soon. She still had the touch of Raúl’s lips branded on hers.
But that didn’t matter anymore.
“See you Sunday,” Josh said when he left her to go to his next class. “I’m really looking forward to it.”
“Me, too.” She smiled, hoping it covered her nervousness at the prospect. She started down the steps.
“Hey!” Graciela’s voice stopped her.
What was she doing here? Should she ignore the woman?
“Good to see you have a new Anglo boy toy,” Graciela said. “That means you’ll leave Dr. Raúl alone.”
“Why? He’s not like Eduardo. He won’t roll over for you.”
Graciela laughed. “He’s a man. Of course I can make him do what I want.”
“What are you doing here?”
“Checking into nursing school. I’ll be more valuable to Dr. Raúl that way.” She crowded Alicia, who took a step back, aware of the long flight of cement below her. “Listen, bitch, stay away from the office with your retarded kid.”
“Don’t bring my son into this.” Alicia stood as tall as she could, reclaiming her space, and lowered her voice to a harsh whisper. “If you want Raúl, feel free to go after him. I don’t care. He’s my son’s pediatrician, not my boyfriend.” Each lie tasted bitter in her mouth, but she needed to make Graciela go away.
She felt sick to her stomach.
God, she hated that woman. Why was Graciela trying to make her life so miserable? What had she ever done to her former best friend?
Graciela eyed her, as if trying to figure out if her words were true. “Just keep it that way. I’ll ruin you if you ruin my plans.” She pushed her finger into Alicia’s arm in time with her words. “Stay. Away. From. Him.” Turning, she went back up the stairs, hips swaying seductively as if nothing had happened.
Alicia was unable to get her pulse under control until she was in her car with the doors locked as tightly as her heart.
• • •
He was an idiot!
Raúl stared at his phone, willing it to ring, to provide an answer to the three texts he’d sent. If only God received text messages. Then he could answer man’s most vexing question: How do you handle a woman?
Obviously, he didn’t have the skills. Not only had he driven Alicia from a relationship, but he’d messed up his ability to help her with Luis.
On top of that, he had to figure out what to do about Juan. His brother had once again crossed the border illegally, screwing Raúl’s chances of getting him back into the country on the government’s terms. Now Juan wanted his help hiding in plain sight so he wouldn’t wind up being deported.
“They’re looking for me,” Juan had said. “They say they’re going to kill me. I had to cross the border.”
Even though Juan was a decade older, he’d held a young man’s fear in his voice. And there was no reason to ask who “they” were. He was referring to one of the many cartels that had more control in Mexico than any criminal organization ought to have.
And his brother was in their sights.
&nb
sp; The problem was, Raúl didn’t know any way to help his brother. He wasn’t part of the country’s shadow economy. He’d told Juan his best bet was to find a church. Many Latinos might be illegal, but they were faithful illegals.
“Sí. Sí. I’ll try that,” Juan had said.
Raúl had so much to put out of his mind. His parents’ refusal to sign the papers the lawyer needed, Juan on the run, and his foul-up with the woman he cared for.
He looked at his schedule. Another forty minutes before his next appointment. Time that should have belonged to Alicia. He pawed through his paperwork. There had to be something for him to do other than think about the chaos tearing through his heart.
A brief knock was followed by the door opening.
The pen in his hand stabbed into his clenched fist.
Damn it. How many times had he told his staff to wait until he told them to come in?
“Am I disturbing you?” His partner interrupted his intended speech on privacy. “Looks like your blood pressure is up a little, Raúl.”
“Just some things on my mind.”
“Oh?” Hadiya settled herself in the chair in front of his desk. “Anything you care to share?”
“No.”
A thin eyebrow inched a little higher. “As you see fit.”
“See?” he said. “You understand. Why don’t all women understand there are some things a man just has to keep to himself?”
The eyebrow lifted even higher. “I’m not in a relationship with you. I’m assuming you’ve had a spat with Alicia and that’s what’s turned you into a grumbling bear.”
“It wasn’t a spat. It’s over.” Before it really began.
“Ahh.” She shifted in her chair. “The problem is that it’s affecting everyone around you. The office staff is complaining to me.”
“Why? I’m no different than I was last week.” He knew as well as she did the statement was a lie. His anger, the flip side of his depression, had sputtered to life several times in the last two days.
“Raúl, when I first met you, you mentioned you’d battled depression most of your life. I told you then I didn’t want it affecting our partnership. Remember?”
He nodded, shame-induced heat flooding his body. He wished he could be as cool as she was—hiding every emotion under her mask of professionalism, yet still projecting a warmth that all her patients loved.